How to Live a balanced family/working life

1. PASTOR, MINISTRY AND
FAMILY
RCCG ZONE 6 CONVENTION

2. OBJECTIVE:
• IDENTIFY PROBLEMS LEADING TO MINISTRY- FAMILY
DYSFUNCTION
• ESTABLISH A BALANCED, HEALTHY AND FULFILLED MINISTRY AND
FAMILY LIFE

3. OUTLINE
• INTRODUCTION
• DEFINITION OF PASTOR, MINISTRY, FAMILY AND CHURCH
• TEXT REVIEW
• MINISTRY /FAMILY DYSFUNCTION
• (BASIC ANATOMY OF THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY)
• THE IDEAL PASTOR AND FAMILY - CREATING A WORK- FAMILY BALANCE

4. INTRODUCTION
• DEFINITION OF TERMS
• PASTOR: A THE LEADER OF A CHRISTIAN CONGREGATION WHO ALSO GIVES ADVICE
AND COUNSEL TO PEOPLE FROM THE COMMUNITY OR CONGREGATION.
• EP 4 : 11 AND HE GAVE SOME, APOSTLES; AND SOME, PROPHETS; AND SOME,
EVANGELISTS; AND SOME, PASTORS AND TEACHERS;
• MINISTER: SERVANT OF GOD ( A PERSON SET APART TO SERVE GOD)
• MINISTRY: THE OFFICE OF SERVICE IN THE BODY OF CHRIST
• FAMILY: A SOCIAL GROUP MADE UP OF PARENTS AND THEIR CHILDREN ( THE BASIC
UNIT OF SOCIETY)

5. TEXT: 1 TIMOTHY 3:1-7
• 3 HERE IS A TRUSTWORTHY SAYING: WHOEVER ASPIRES TO BE AN
OVERSEER DESIRES A NOBLE TASK. 2 NOW THE OVERSEER IS TO BE ABOVE
REPROACH, FAITHFUL TO HIS WIFE, TEMPERATE, SELF-CONTROLLED,
RESPECTABLE, HOSPITABLE, ABLE TO TEACH, 3 NOT GIVEN TO
DRUNKENNESS, NOT VIOLENT BUT GENTLE, NOT QUARRELSOME, NOT A LOVER
OF MONEY. 4 HE MUST MANAGE HIS OWN FAMILY WELL AND SEE THAT HIS
CHILDREN OBEY HIM, AND HE MUST DO SO IN A MANNER WORTHY OF
FULL[A] RESPECT. 5 (IF ANYONE DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO MANAGE HIS OWN
FAMILY, HOW CAN HE TAKE CARE OF GOD’S CHURCH?) 6 HE MUST NOT BE A
RECENT CONVERT, OR HE MAY BECOME CONCEITED AND FALL UNDER THE SAME
JUDGMENT AS THE DEVIL. 7 HE MUST ALSO HAVE A GOOD REPUTATION WITH
OUTSIDERS, SO THAT HE WILL NOT FALL INTO DISGRACE AND INTO THE DEVIL’S
TRAP.

6. 3 This is a faithful saying: If a man desires the position of a
bishop, he desires a good work. 2 A bishop then must be
blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-
minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; 3 not
given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle,
not quarrelsome, not covetous; 4 one who rules his own
house well, having his children in submission with all
reverence 5 (for if a man does not know how to rule his own
house, how will he take care of the church of God?); 6 not a
novice, lest being puffed up with pride he fall into the same
condemnation as the devil. 7 Moreover he must have a good
testimony among those who are outside, lest he fall into
reproach and the snare of the devil.

7. 1 TIMOTHY 5:8
• BUT IF ANY PROVIDE NOT FOR HIS OWN, AND SPECIALLY FOR THOSE OF HIS
OWN HOUSE, HE HATH DENIED THE FAITH, AND IS WORSE THAN AN INFIDEL.

8. IF THE FOUNDATIONS BE DESTROYED WHAT WILL
THE RIGHTEOUS DO……. PSALM 11:3
• DIVORCE RATES: 60 %(IDENTIFYY AS CHRISTIAN), 38% (REGULAR FAITHFUL CHRISTIAN).
PASTOR DIVORCE RATE: 25 %.
• DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN PASTORS
• WHY PASTORS DIVORCE.
• ONGOING ADULTERY/PORNOGRAPHY (WHICH IS THE SAME AS ADULTERY IN THE HEART – MATT 5:28)
• LACK OF COMMUNICATION
• DRUG OR ALCOHOL ADDICTIONS/ABUSE
• PHYSICAL/EMOTIONAL ABUSE
• SEXUAL PROBLEMS
• FINANCIAL PROBLEMS
• CHURCH = WORLD

9. FAMILY DYSFUNCTION
• MALACHI 2:16: 'I HATE DIVORCE, SAYS THE LORD GOD OF ISRAEL.

10. LIFE PRIORITIES
• GOD FIRST
• FAMILY SECOND (PRIMARY MINISTRY)
• YOUR FIRST CHURCH
• MINISTRY/ JOB
• A BALANCED BELIEVER SHOULD
BLEND HIS MINISTRY INTO HIS
CAREER/JOB EXAMPLE: DANIEL.
• CHURCH (THE INSTITUTION)

11. TYPES OF FAMILY/MINISTRY DYSFUNCTION
• 1. THE SPIRITUALLY DEFICIENT
MINISTER.
• PRAYER LESS
• CARNAL :1 TIM 6: 3-6
• LOVER OF MONEY AND THE
PLEASURES OF LIFE.. EX: SONS OF ELI,
SAMUEL & DAVID
• COVETOUS PASTORS 2PETER 2:1-3
• DO MINISTRY FOR GAIN (MONEY) AND
FAME
• STRUGGLING IN MINISTRY
• REPENT
• WALK IN HOLINESS
• STUDY TO SHOW YOURSELF APPROVED.
 WAIT ON THE HOLY SPIRIT. HE WILL
BAPTIZE YOU WITH HIS POWER . ACT
1:8

12. TYPES OF FAMILY DYSFUNCTION
• MOSES: EXODUS 18:13-27
• ELIJAH: 1KINGS 19:14-18
• SUFFERED FROM
BURNOUT/EXHAUSTION
• MOSES ANOINTED 70 JUDGES
• ELIJAH ANOINTED ELISHA,
• 2. THE SUPER PASTOR.
• HEAVILY ANOINTED
• SPEND TIME WITH THE LORD
• SPEND A LOT OF TIME MINISTERING
TO OTHERS
• NO TIME TO REST AND RECOVER
• VERY LITTLE TIME FOR THE FAMILY

13. 2 KINGS 19:14-18
• 14 HE SAID, “I HAVE BEEN VERY JEALOUS FOR THE LORD, THE GOD OF HOSTS.
FOR THE PEOPLE OF ISRAEL HAVE FORSAKEN YOUR COVENANT, THROWN DOWN
YOUR ALTARS, AND KILLED YOUR PROPHETS WITH THE SWORD, AND I, EVEN I
ONLY, AM LEFT, AND THEY SEEK MY LIFE, TO TAKE IT AWAY.” 15 AND THE LORD
SAID TO HIM, “GO, RETURN ON YOUR WAY TO THE WILDERNESS OF DAMASCUS.
AND WHEN YOU ARRIVE, YOU SHALL ANOINT HAZAEL TO BE KING OVER SYRIA.
16 AND JEHU THE SON OF NIMSHI YOU SHALL ANOINT TO BE KING OVER ISRAEL,
AND ELISHA THE SON OF SHAPHAT OF ABEL-MEHOLAH YOU SHALL ANOINT TO
BE PROPHET IN YOUR PLACE. 17 AND THE ONE WHO ESCAPES FROM THE SWORD
OF HAZAEL SHALL JEHU PUT TO DEATH, AND THE ONE WHO ESCAPES FROM THE
SWORD OF JEHU SHALL ELISHA PUT TO DEATH. 18 YET I WILL LEAVE SEVEN
THOUSAND IN ISRAEL, ALL THE KNEES THAT HAVE NOT BOWED TO BAAL, AND
EVERY MOUTH THAT HAS NOT KISSED HIM.”

14. TYPES OF FAMILY DYSFUNCTION
• 3. THE SUPERMINISTER WITH DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY.
• THE MINISTER IS SO ANOINTED.
• THE SPOUSE OR CHILDREN ARE A DISGRACE
• EXAMPLE:
• THE SONS OF ELI, SAMUEL AND DAVID.
• 1 SAM 8:1-3,
• ABUSIVE AND UNHOLY UNIONS
• 2COR 6:14:14 BE YE NOT UNEQUALLY YOKED TOGETHER WITH UNBELIEVERS: FOR WHAT
FELLOWSHIP HATH RIGHTEOUSNESS WITH UNRIGHTEOUSNESS? AND WHAT COMMUNION HATH
LIGHT WITH DARKNESS?
• AHAB AND JEZEBEL
• SAMSON & DELILAH

15. • I SAMUEL 8 - 1.AND IT CAME TO PASS, WHEN SAMUEL WAS OLD, THAT HE MADE
HIS SONS JUDGES OVER ISRAEL.
• 2 NOW THE NAME OF HIS FIRSTBORN WAS JOEL; AND THE NAME OF HIS SECOND,
ABIAH: THEY WERE JUDGES IN BEERSHEBA.
• 3 AND HIS SONS WALKED NOT IN HIS WAYS, BUT TURNED ASIDE AFTER LUCRE,
AND TOOK BRIBES, AND PERVERTED JUDGMENT.

16. 3 This is a faithful saying: If a man desires the position of a
bishop, he desires a good work. 2 A bishop then must be
blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-
minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; 3 not
given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle,
not quarrelsome, not covetous; 4 one who rules his own
house well, having his children in submission with all
reverence 5 (for if a man does not know how to rule his own
house, how will he take care of the church of God?); 6 not a
novice, lest being puffed up with pride he fall into the same
condemnation as the devil. 7 Moreover he must have a good
testimony among those who are outside, lest he fall into
reproach and the snare of the devil.

17. 1. THE SPIRITUAL DEFICIENT
2. THE SUPERPASTOR
3. THE SUPERMINISTER WITH DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY
4. THE FINANCIALY DYSFUNCTIONAL MINISTER

18. 1 TIMOTHY 5:8
• BUT IF ANY PROVIDE NOT FOR HIS OWN, AND SPECIALLY FOR THOSE OF HIS
OWN HOUSE, HE HATH DENIED THE FAITH, AND IS WORSE THAN AN INFIDEL.

19. • UNABLE TO PROVIDE FOR HIS OWN
FOR MULTIPLE REASONS.
• “I AM CALLED FULL TIME”: THE MOST
COMMON REASON.
• PAUL WAS CALLED FULL TIME BUT HE
WORKED
• "WORKED NIGHT AND DAY, LABORING
AND TOILING SO THAT WE WOULD
NOT BE A BURDEN TO ANY OF YOU"
(2 THESSALONIANS 3:8).
• ACTS: 18: 3-4 2THERE HE FOUND A
JEW NAMED AQUILA, A NATIVE OF
PONTUS, WHO HAD RECENTLY COME
FROM ITALY WITH HIS WIFE PRISCILLA
BECAUSE CLAUDIUS HAD ORDERED
ALL THE JEWS TO LEAVE ROME. PAUL
WENT TO VISIT THEM, 3AND HE
STAYED AND WORKED WITH THEM BE
CAUSE THEY WERE TENTMAKERS BY
TRADE, JUST AS HE WAS. :

20. SOLUTION TO FAMILY/MINISTRY. DYSFUNCTION.
• SEAT AT THE MASTERS FEET:
• TAKE YOUR FAMILY ALONG
• ABRAHAM & ISAAC , ISAAC & JACOB
• 2TIM1: 4-6 : LOIS, EUNICE AND
TIMOTHY
• AQUILA AND PRISCILLA ACTS: 18:1-3
• MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON.
• TIME MANAGEMENT
• REST: MRK 6:31
• EXERCISE: 1TIM 4:8
• EAT GOOD FOOD
• LOVE & HUMILITY /WORSHIP
• ACTIVELY TRAIN YOUR CHILDREN
• FIND WORK FOR YOUR HANDS TO
FEED YOUR FAMILY.

21. • 2TIM 1: 4RECALLING YOUR TEARS, I LONG TO SEE YOU SO THAT I MAY BE
FILLED WITH JOY. 5 I AM
REMINDED OF YOUR SINCERE FAITH, WHICH FIRST DWELT IN YOUR GRANDMO
THER LOIS AND YOUR MOTHER EUNICE, AND I AM CONVINCED IS IN YOU AS
WELL. 6FOR THIS REASON I REMIND YOU TO FAN INTO FLAME THE GIFT OF
GOD, WHICH IS IN YOU THROUGH THE LAYING ON OF MY HANDS.…