We can be very quick to look externally for the issues - and excluding ourselves from the post-mortem process. Restore yourself to responsibility by finding the turnaround.

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+44 (0) 7976 751 095 dan@danbeverly.com http://danbeverly.com
Finding the Turnaround
21 September 2016
We can be very quick to look externally for the issues - and excluding ourselves from
the post-mortem process. Restore yourself to responsibility by finding the turnaround.
Many of us – and perhaps especially those of us in
leadership roles – can be very quick to look externally
when things don’t go to plan or miss expectation. To
somehow exclude ourselves from the post-mortem.
And we can be doubly-guilty of this external focus bias
when those circumstances leave within us uncomfortably
negative feelings.
But more than we care to admit, we are responsible for the
reality we create.
And as for the uncomfortable feelings that result – well,
that’s ALL us. Because it’s not the thing itself that upsets us,
but the thoughts, beliefs and stories we attach to the thing.
As long as we think the problem is out there, the situation
is going to be beyond us.
Challenging our
view of the world
To take back control:
1. Notice the story you’re telling
yourself and ask: “Is It True?”
2. And then: look for the “turnaround”.
The turnaround is something I love to have my private
clients challenge themselves with.
It’s about taking our judgement and turning it on its head.
Statements become their opposite. Statements about others
become statements about ourselves. Statements that are
external in focus become internal in focus.
Here are a few examples.
(Notice what the turnarounds do for
the person thinking the thought.)
She doesn’t trust me.
 She does trust me (but I choose not to see it).
 I don’t trust her (but won’t admit it).
 I don’t trust myself (engendering mistrust from
others).

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+44 (0) 7976 751 095 dan@danbeverly.com http://danbeverly.com
He should have done a better
job.
 I could have done a better job (supporting and
delegating).
 He couldn’t have done a better job (with the tools
and direction given).
They are not prepared to make
the change.
 They are prepared to make the change (but in a
different way).
 I am not prepared to make the change (but care not
to admit it).
My team should respect me
more.
 I could respect my team more (and lead by
example).
 My team shouldn’t respect me (until I earn it).
 I will respect myself more (engendering respect from
others).
They should have promoted me.
 They shouldn’t have promoted me (because honestly,
I’m not ready yet).
 I could have promoted myself (and acted up to my
target role).
My team failed to meet to my
expectations.
 My team met my expectations (as set by me).
 I failed to meet my team’s expectations (with poor
delegation).
 I failed to meet my expectations (and the standards I
set for myself).
The power of
the turnaround
Finding the turnaround is not about apportioning blame.
It’s about noticing that what we see on the outside is
more-often-than-not a projection of our own thinking.
Notice, in any of the above examples that might resonate
with you, how the turnaround is as true (if not truer!)
than the original thought.
Notice also that the turnaround restores me to two useful
states:
1. Self-awareness, leading to options and choices.
2. Accountability, reclaiming my responsibility and
influence.
With these useful states, we ultimately achieve the result.
And as a special bonus, with far less of the uncomfortable
feelings that accompanied the original thought.
So from here: make it your habit to challenge your stories
and look for the turnaround – in any way you care to,
until self-realisation results.
REFERENCES
If this thinking resonates with you, read and enjoy the
powerful work of Byron Katie.
Byron Katie, Loving What Is (London: Rider, 2002).