Based on Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges, this lesson discusses the end results of anger. Bitterness, resentment, enmity, hostility, and grudges are all addressed.

1. THE WEEDS OF ANGER
Based on Respectable sins by Jerry Bridges

2.  We tend to accept anger as a part of life. It’s tolerable because we know it’s going to
happen over and over.
 The Bible isn’t quite so accepting when it comes to our anger.
 We are to put it away. Ephesians 4:31. Colossians 3:8
 Anger is associated with a lot of ugly sins, like bitterness, malice, clamour, wrath,
slander, evil or corrupt communication (obscene talk, cursing, blasphemy, etc).
 II Corinthians 12:20
 Ephesians 4:26 Paul is not giving us permission to be angry here; he takes it for
granted that you will become angry and he is telling you how to handle it.
 Loose translation: “Don’t hold on to your anger. Get over it quickly.”

3.  We’re going to look at some of the long-term results of anger, or the
“weeds of anger.” Weeds are always something you want to get rid of.
 Anger’s weeds are noxious; they can poison the minds of others around
us.
 Resentment is anger held on to and internalized.
 It arises in the heart of a person who is ill-treated in some way but who
doesn’t feel in a position to do anything about it. (Happens to
employees and spouses a lot.)
 Resentment may be more difficult to deal with than outwardly
expressed anger because the person often continues to nurse his
wounds and dwell on his ill-treatment.
 Bitterness is resentment that has grown into a feeling of ongoing
animosity.
 Resentment can dissipate over time, but bitterness continues to grow
and fester.

4.  Bitterness frequently occurs within a church family or our blood family.
Someone is ill-treated (or thinks they are) and instead of seeking to
resolve the issue, they allow the hurt to fester and become bitter.
 Regardless of the real or perceived ill-treatment, bitterness is never a
biblical option.
 Enmity and hostility are synonyms that denote a higher level of ill will
than does bitterness.
 Bitterness may be marked by polite behavior, but enmity and hostility is
usually expressed openly in the form of denigrating or hateful speech.
 Hate or grudge is the next level of animosity. It involves plans to get
revenge against another person.
 Genesis 27:41; 50:15; Psalm 55;3
 They usually dare not act on them, but the get a perverse enjoyment
out of going over them in their minds.

5.  Romans 12:19-21 is Paul’s answer to hate and how to deal with it.
 Strife is open conflict between parties. This is no longer a subtle sin;
this is where church fights and family feuds start.
 It often occurs between self-righteous Christians who never consider
the possibility that their own attitudes or heated words contribute to
the strife. In their minds, it is always the other party who is in the
wrong and causing the strife.
 All these definitions are to tell you something simple: anger held on to
is not only sin, it is spiritually dangerous.
 Anger is never static. It is always growing unless you deal with it. So
how do we do that?

6. FIRST, WE MUST ALWAYS LOOK TO THE
SOVEREIGNTY OF GOD.
 God doesn’t cause people to sin against us, but He does allow it, and it
is always for a purpose – most often our own growth in Christlikeness.
 Genesis 45:8
 Joseph had this attitude during his entire time in slavery, not just at
then end when he was 2nd in command of the Egypt.
 Nowhere in the Bible is it even suggested that Joseph became bitter.
Instead it tells us he did his work well and was so well regarded by
Potiphar and the keeper of the prison that both gave him major
responsibilities.

7.  Recall that the other person’s actions are under the sovereign control of
God. Though those actions may be sinful in themselves, God intends
them for my good.
 Genesis 50:20
 God may be preparing you in some way for greater usefulness.
 You may never know why you are in that particular situation.
 Actively reflecting on God’s sovereignty is the first step to defuse anger.

8. SECOND, WE SHOULD PRAY THAT GOD WILL
ENABLE US TO GROW IN LOVE.
 I Peter 4:8
 Peter’s words mean that love enables us to overlook a lot of sinful
actions of other people.
 Love enables you to overlook snubs, embarrassment, or
inconveniences.
 We can choose how we react to the real or perceived wrong actions of
other people. While love may not cover significant sins, it can certainly
cover many ordinary wrongs.
 We are to love earnestly, meaning we should diligently pursue it in
dependence on the Holy Spirit.
 I Corinthians 13:5

9.  Do you let the words of others hurt you? Love could overlook that.
 Do you tend to file away in your mind the wrongs done to you? Love
doesn’t keep record of wrongs.
 That means we cease to bring them up to ourselves or to others. We
stop feeding the hurt. And if it does come to mind, we dismiss it
immediately.

10. THIRD, WE LEARN TO FORGIVE AS GOD
HAS FORGIVEN US.
 Matthew 18:21-35
 This servant owed the 200,000 years’ wages for the typical laborer. That
would be like me owing $5-6 billion.
 He is forgiven by the king and then finds someone who owes the
equivalent of $10-15,000.
 The first amount represents our moral and spiritual debt to God. It is
something so enormous we could never pay.
 The damage to God’s glory by our sin is determined not by the severity
of our sin but by the value of God’s glory.

11.  The king in this parable forgave the debt. This act of mercy cost him
tremendously.
 In the same manner, it cost God to forgive us. It cost Him the death of
His Son.
 No price can be put on that death, but God paid it so He could forgive
each of us the enormous spiritual debt we owe Him.
 Here’s the problem: the moral debt of wrongdoing, of sinful words and
acts against us, is virtually nothing compared to our debt to God.
 The basis of our forgiving one another is the enormity of God’s
forgiveness of us. We are to forgive because we’ve been forgiven of so
much.
 This attitude will not cause our anger to disappear immediately; but this
attitude in action does give us a weapon to use to put our anger to
death.