1. Leħen Familji Nsara April 2015 ● Ħarġa Nru 25
Kummissjoni Familja Naxxar
żuru l-webpage tal-Kummissjoni Familja Naxxar Agħfas hawn biex tmur fil-paġna ● e-mail: familjiflimkien@gmail.com
Iż-żwieġ huwa vjaġġ ...
"L-imħabba ta' Kristu, li tbierek u tqaddes l-unjoni
ta’ bejn raġel u mara, tista’ ssostni u ġġedded l-
imħabba tagħkom anke meta minn għajnejn
umani din tkun iddagħjfet, miksura jew saħansitra
ntilfet għal kollox. L-imħabba ta' Kristu tista’
tqajjem u ġġedded il-ferħ ta’ koppja li
jakkumpanjaw lil xulxin. Dan huwa l-qofol taż-
żwieġ: li raġel u mara jagħmlu l-mixja ta’ ħajjithom
flimkien. Għalhekk raġel għandu jgħid lil martu
"Nħobbok u għalhekk irrid ngħinek biex kuljum issir
aktar mara". Bl-istess mod mara tgħid lil żewġha
"Nħobbok u għalhekk irrid ngħinek biex kuljum issir
aktar raġel". Dan huwa x-xogħol tagħkom
flimkien. Hekk apprezzaw ir-reċiproċità u d-
differenzi ta’ bejnietkom. Dan il-vjaġġ ma jkunx
dejjem fil-bnazzi u ħieles min-nuqqas ta' qbil, kieku
ma jkunx vjaġġ uman. Din il-mixja titlob impenn,
kultant tkun diffiċli u anke turbulenti, iżda hekk hija
l-ħajja tal-bniedem!"
Silta mill-omelija tal-Papa Franġisku waqt li għaqqad 20 koppja fis-
sagrament taż-żwieġ fl-14 ta’ Settembru 2014.
Warrbu l-iskrins u tkellmu
Il-Papa Franġisku jixtieq li l-familji jiftakru li
t-teknoloġija mhix kollox fil-ħajja. "Meta
nikbru fl-għarfien tal-importanza li tassew
niltaqgħu flimkien, nistgħu nħaddmu t-
teknoloġija aħjar u mingħajr ma nħalluha
tiddomina l-ħajja tagħna."
"It-teknoloġija u l-midja jistgħu jkunu ta'
xkiel jekk dawn isiru mezz biex nevitaw li
nisimgħu lill-oħrajn, biex nevitaw kuntatt
fiżiku, biex nimlew kull mument ta' silenzju
u ta' mistrieħ. Ma ninsewx li s-silenzju
huwa element integrali tal-
komunikazzjoni"
Il-Papa qal dan fil-messaġġ annwali tiegħu fil-Jum Dinji tal-
Komunikazjoni.
L-irwol tal-missier fil-ħajja tal-familja
Importanti li l-missirijiet ikunu preżenti fil-ħajja ta’ wliedhom, għaliex in-nuqqas tal-figura tal-
missier jista' jkollha konsegwenzi gravi. Meta Ġesù għallimna nsejħu lil Alla “Missierna”, Huwa
għolla u sebbaħ ir-relazzjoni ta’ bejn il-missier u wliedu, li hija fundamentali għas-soċjetà.
Sfortunatament illum qegħdin nesperjenzaw kriżi ta' paternità. Fil-passat kienet aċċettata u
komuni l-ideja ta’ missier awtoritarju u xi drabi anke ripressiv, iżda s-soċjetà moderna tinsab
inċerta u konfuża dwar dan l-irwol. F’dawk il-familji fejn il-missier hu assenti, iż-żgħażagħ
iħossuhom orfni, jixxejru ma kull riħ fl-aktar mumenti kritiċi tal-formazzjoni tagħhom. Il-missirijiet
għandhom ikunu responsabbli, u jagħtu eżempju ta’ għerf u tjieba, li jservu ta’ gwida. Is-soċjetà
b’mod ġenerali għandha responsabbiltà li ma tħallix liż-żgħażagħ għal rashom, mingħajr idejali,
valuri, tamiet, il-possibbiltà ta’ xogħol kif ukoll żvilupp spiritwali. Hekk kif Ġesù wiegħed li ma
jħalliniex orfni, ejjew nitolbu biex isaħħaħilna l-apprezzament għall-irwol tal-missier u biex inrabbu
missirijiet tajba għall-benefiċċju tal-familji, tal-Knisja u tad-dinja tagħna.
Estratt minn diskors tal-Papa dwar il-familja nhar l-Erbgħa 28 ta’ Jannar 2015 matul l-udjenza ġenerali.
Merħba ħbieb!
Nistednukom għal-laqgħa ta’ formazzjoni għall-
koppji fit-18 ta’ April 2015 fis-7:15pm dwar “L-
impatt tas-soċjetà fuq il-familja" fl-annex tal-Knisja
Parrokkjali tan-Naxxar. Din ser tkun immexxija minn
Fr Joe Inguanez, soċjologu u Direttur Eżekutiv ta’
DISCERN - l-istitut ta’ riċerka tal-Knisja f’Malta.
Ejjew u stiednu koppji oħrajn jiġu magħkom.
Il-Papa Franġisku ta’ sikwit fid-diskorsi
tiegħu jitratta ż-żwieġ u l-familja. Hawn
għandna tliet siltiet minn diskorsi riċenti. Fit-
tieni paġna għandna wkoll link għal diskors
dwar id-dixxiplina tat-tfal.

2. Always say “Yes!” to your spouse
This is not a license to blurt out “yes!” when your
wife asks if she looks fat in those pants! And if
your husband is trying in vain to find his keys
and mutters, “I’m such an idiot,” that is not the
time for an enthusiastic “yes!”
However generally, “yes” is not only a great
response, it is the best response. Here are a few
examples:
 When he asks you to watch an action
movie that doesn’t interest you.
 When she asks you to sit and talk with her.
 When he asks you to come to bed early.
 When she asks if you will take her dancing.
Saying yes to your spouse not only shows them
that you value what matters to them, it sets the
tone for your marriage — where each of you
are looking out not just for your own interests,
but also (and foremost) for your spouse’s needs
and desires.
Also say “What can I do to make you feel
loved?”
When you ask this question, you are moving
beyond simply being responsive to your
spouse’s needs, and are seeking out ways to
communicate your love.
And when your spouse asks you this question —
honour his/her efforts by answering it. Some of
us struggle with the expectation that “my
spouse should know what would make me feel
loved right now.” Well, he doesn’t and she
doesn’t. But instead of focusing on your
spouse’s lack of paranormal abilities, choose to
be grateful that your mate is standing before
you and asking for a way to demonstrate love
to you. That is amazing! Reward the effort by
openly and kindly communicating your needs.
to you. That is amazing! Reward the effort by
openly and kindly communicating your needs.
Go on to say “I appreciate it when you . . . “
Expectations can be extremely damaging to a
marriage. When you stop being grateful for
who your spouse is, and for the many ways that
they daily demonstrate love and commitment
to you, you stop looking for and appreciating
the things your spouse does right. Instead, you
begin building a case against them based on
your perception of what they are doing wrong.
This has two consequences. The first is that
bitterness begins to overwhelm you and
squeeze the joy out of your life. The second is
that your spouse will conclude there is no use in
trying, because you’ll find the proverbial needle
buried under a haystack of good intentions.
If this is your reality right now, it doesn’t have to
stay that way. But it starts with a concerted,
and daily effort to catch your spouse doing
things right. And when you catch your spouse,
verbally appreciate those efforts! If your
husband unloads the dishwasher, don’t chastise
him for the water drops on the kitchen floor,
acknowledge his attempt to serve you.
Responding with words of appreciation has two
consequences. The first is that an attitude of
gratitude begins to take root in your heart and
squeeze the bitterness out of your life. The
second is that your spouse starts searching for
more ways to demonstrate love to you. This
second part takes a while, don’t short-circuit
the process by returning back to the world of
expectations and scorekeeping. Show
appreciation to your spouse because it is the
right thing to do, and because, if nothing else, it
will change your heart.
Adapted from an article “5 things to always say to your spouse” at
http://bowlingwithed.com/
żuru l-webpage tal-Kummissjoni Familja Naxxar Agħfas hawn biex tmur fil-paġna ● e-mail: familjiflimkien@gmail.com
Click here -
Pope
Francis on
“How to
discipline
your child”