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How to Break Up Well
Justin Young
Chinese Community Church of Indianapolis
Pastor of English (↓) and Youth (↑) Ministries
Micah
 age 4
Elia
age 2
Why


              ?
does
breaking up
hurt
so much
How to Break Up Well
Don’t
Stay single.
Don’t
Stay single.
Don’t
        Marry your first.
Attractive
Attractive


Godly
Attractive


        Ready
Godly   for marriage
        and more
Attractive


        Ready
Godly   for marriage
        and more
Decide
Diverging
         paths




Decide
Diverging
         paths

         Habitual
         relationship



Decide
Diverging
         paths

         Habitual
         relationship

         Constant
Decide   combat
Diverging
         paths

         Habitual
         relationship

         Constant
Decide   combat

         Sexual
         promiscuity
Diverging
         paths

         Habitual
         relationship

         Constant
Decide   combat

         Sexual
         promiscuity
         Unfaithful
         actions
Diverging
         paths

         Habitual
         relationship

         Constant
Decide   combat

         Sexual
         promiscuity
         Unfaithful
         actions
         Parental
         objections
Do
Heartbreaker
Talk
               with God.




Heartbreaker
Talk
               with God.

               Clarify
               the bad and good.

Heartbreaker
Talk
               with God.

               Clarify
               the bad and good.

Heartbreaker   Plan
               the time and place.
Talk
               with God.

               Clarify
               the bad and good.

Heartbreaker   Plan
               the time and place.

               Communicate
               with honesty and humility.
Talk
               with God.

               Clarify
               the bad and good.

Heartbreaker   Plan
               the time and place.

               Communicate
               with honesty and humility.

               Listen
               but be clear and firm.
Heartbroken
Let go
              with persistence & patience.



Heartbroken
(x1y1)s+1+            (x2y2)s+1 
        x = # of exes
        y = total years with exes
        s = sexual relationships
        higher total = more drama
Let go
              with persistence & patience.

              Address
              your emotions.
Heartbroken
4Qs
What are you angry about?
4Qs
What are you angry about?
      Who/what are you missing?
4Qs
What are you angry about?
      Who/what are you missing?
4Qs   What are you learning?
What are you angry about?
      Who/what are you missing?
4Qs   What are you learning?
      What do you need now?
Let go
              with persistence & patience.

              Address
              your emotions.
Heartbroken
              Participate
              in community.
Let go
              with persistence & patience.

              Address
              your emotions.
Heartbroken
              Participate
              in community.

              Enjoy
              the new normalcy.
Gospel
Honesty


Gospel
Honesty

         Empathy
Gospel
Honesty

         Empathy
Gospel
         Conviction
Honesty

         Empathy
Gospel
         Conviction

         Hope
“He will wipe every tear from their
eyes. There will be no more death
or mourning or crying or pain, for
the old order of things has passed
away.”
                      -Revelation 21:4
Q&A
bit.ly/mccabreakup

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How to Break Up Well

Editor's Notes

  1. Sense of rejection - Loss [time, money, friends] - Force to let go - Youthful idealism; Gospel > Things are not as they ought to be (Gen 3)
  2. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.” (Hebrews 4:15) / “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
  3. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.” (Hebrews 4:15) / “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
  4. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.” (Hebrews 4:15) / “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
  5. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.” (Hebrews 4:15) / “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)