The document describes the drama triangle pattern of communication. It provides an example of a person ("our friend") who exhibits bully behaviors within the drama triangle. This person fails to accept responsibility for their actions, instead blaming others or manipulating situations. They are aggressive towards others who frustrate them or try to hold them accountable. The drama triangle reflects efforts to avoid feeling abandoned or needing to change by externalizing problems onto other people and circumstances.

1. Understanding Three Scripts of Personality
Billy Barnett M.S. LMHC

2.  The drama triangle was conceptualized in the 1960’s by
Dr. Steven Carpman.
 It is also called the Victim Triangle.
 It is a communication pattern that people use to try to
avoid responsibility for internalizing (learning)
responsibility for their behaviors.

3.  Let’s imagine our friend for a moment. Our friend is
constantly struggling with learning lessons and
accepting responsibility for his…or her actions.
 He seems to think that other people are the reason
why he has problems. They are always “bailing out” on
him.
 He tends to project “a bad feeling” that others just
can’t quite figure out, and we usually feel like he is
manipulating us. Many people say it’s like walking on
eggshells around him.

4. Bully
Victim Savior

5.  Our friend is most famous for his tendency to threaten
others. He may curse out his friends and especially his
family.
 He was seen recently threatening a classmate who had
accidentally parked in “his” spot.
 He was also seen at “Burger World” exploding in anger
at the worker who gave him pickles on his deluxe
double cheese burger.

6.  In class our friend failed to turn in his midterm project
because he was “out” for a week. He cursed at the
instructor for being a racist, and a few other choice
words…
 Our friend went back to “Burger World” the next week
with a classmate. He waited for the manager to walk
by and called out in a loud voice “they never listen to
me when I come here.” The manager gave him a
surprised look but didn’t confront him.

7.  Our friend approached his instructor after class and
“helped him” by informing him that two of his friends
cheated on their assignment. He said that he should
give them failing grades to show them who’s boss.
 After yelling at the classmate for parking in his spot he
said that he would help him out by being his partner
in the next class project.

8.  The ability to accept responsibility for negative
behavior without blaming the outside world (such as
other people).
 The inside of the triangle.

9.  An attempt to transfer responsibility for behavior onto
the outside environment (Such as other people, places
or events).
 For the triangle our friend is experiencing frantic
efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
 It’s a self fulfilling prophecy where he tries to make
everyone else the problem by changing his script to
match up with his method of avoiding responsibility
for his behavior.

10.  He must avoid learning a lesson because he believes
the world will not accept him in his current condition
 He believes his ego will be diminished if he learns
something. Maybe everyone else will expect him to
change his behavior in the future if he learns the
lesson this time…so he will sabotage the outside world
and the people in it to avoid learning the lesson
(internalizing) and as a result growing through the
experience.