Alternate final mission concept for The Simpsons: Hit & Run

1.
THE SIMPSONS: HIT & RUN
ALTERNATE FINAL MISSION
IN-D'OH-PENDENCE DAY
written by
Victor Hugo Bahman

2. INT. ALIEN SHIP - NIGHT
The UFO is in dissarry after abducting a car full of toxic
nuclear waste. The cabin flashes red as a circus of alarms
and dials go haywire.
Two octopuses in space helmets with trails of goo - KANG and
KODOS - rush to repair the damage.
KANG
I told you not to ignore the check
engine light.
KODOS
I don't undersand! The tape over it
usually fixes it.
*BOOM* Another explosion bursts as the aliens shout out. Kang
looks to a flashing monitor.
KANG
Diagnostic scans report critical
levels of radiation damage.
Kodos struggles to catch precarious falling objects at the
furthest reaches of his tentacles. The card pyramid! The
Rigel-7 snowglobe! Not the faberge alien egg!
KODOS
A-ha! So it wasn't the engine.
Lost concentration for a second and damn! They all smashed.
One piece even landed on a button. I wonder what it does?
EXT. SPRINGFIELD - CONTINUOUS
Unbeknownst to our alien baddies, they are broadcasting their
discussion to the city.
KANG (O.S)
Running trace on the source of the
radiation. It appears to be coming
from the nuclear power plant, with
another significant source coming
from the resevoir the town draws
its drinking supply from.
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, BURNS' OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
Ancient billionaire MR BURNS stands by his grand office
window surrounded by disgruntled lackies.

3. 2.
Outside the window we see the UFO hovering above the city
with its great techonological advances.
MR BURNS
(sheepish)
Pshaw, how can we even trust the
technology of these extra-
terrestrials? Besides, since when
Springfield having a so-called
'drinking supply'? Yes, that should
do.
EXT. SPRINGFIELD ELEMENTARY PLAYGROUND - CONTINUOUS
Standing below the ship are balding, chubby, oafish HOMER
(our hero? Ok...), his quick-witted daughter LISA, and her
rebellious older brother BART.
KODOS (O.S)
Then we must destroy this nuclear
plant which should be easy to do
with our technology which is so
rudimentary to us but so advanced
to them!
The aliens cackle over the speaker as the flying saucer races
over towards the power plant.
BART
You'd think it was enough that they
were destroying the city. They
didn't have to make fun of us too.
HOMER
Did you hear that? They're blowing
up the plant. No work Monday! Woo-
hoo!
LISA
Dad, you've got to stop them!
HOMER
What part of woo-hoo did you not
understand?
LISA
It won't just destory the plant,
it'll wipe out the city!
HOMER
Oh honey, death is a natural part
of life.

4. 3.
BART
Isn't Duff brewed in Springfield?
HOMER
Yeah... Ah!
(taking off after the ship)
Come back here you prohobition
loving aliens!
MISSION START SCREEN: 'In-d'oh-pendence Day'
MISSION DESCRIPTION: 'RACE THE ALIENS TO THE POWER PLANT AND
SAVE SPRINGFIELD BEFORE THEY DESTROY IT!'
OBJECTIVE 1: 'RACE THE UFO TO THE POWER PLANT PARKING LOT'
Time Limit: 1:30.
Homer starts in ABE SIMPSON'S (his father) car. As he races
to the nuclear plant, the UFO's faulty tractor beam will turn
on sporadically.
These attacks are signaled by red circles where the beam will
turn on. Getting caught in it can lift the car in place,
slowing it down, and create uneven ground which will slow the
vehicle should Homer drive over it.
INTERIM DIALOGUE: The aliens broadcast from the UFO.
KANG (O.S)
Will you turn off that infernal
beam?
KODOS (O.S)
I can't! This damn thing is on the
fritz!
KANG (O.S)
'The Fritz'? Sorry, I didn't
realise I had a human on board.
KODOS (O.S)
So I like to pick up some of the
culture on our trips. Sue me.
KODOS (O.S) (CONT'D)
Maybe we should stop and ask for
directions?
KANG (O.S)
Don't be foolish! I know a
shortcut.

5. 4.
KODOS (O.S)
Wow, I can see Rigel-7 from here.
KANG (O.S)
That's Shelbyville idiot. Oh, no.
My mistake.
KODOS (O.S)
Do you find it strange that on this
planet we are the aliens and they
are the us?
KODOS (O.S.) (CONT'D)
He's gaining on us! Oh wait,
nevermind, that's not him. Don't
tell them I said this but they all
look kind of the same to me.
INTERIM DIALOGUE: Homer's car takes damage/crashes into
something.
HOMER
The car was like that when I stole
it.
HOMER (CONT'D)
(scared)
Ooh I hope that didn't belong to
anyone stronger than me...
HOMER (CONT'D)
Hey, we're on the same side!
Earth's.
HOMER (CONT'D)
Bill the damages to me! Ned
Flanders!
INTERIM DIALOGUE: Homer's car is caught in the beam.
HOMER (CONT'D)
I don't remember this car having an
up gear.
HOMER (CONT'D)
And they said I was overweight...
HOMER (CONT'D)
That's it. I'm locking the doors.

6. 5.
INTERIM DIALOGUE: Homer drives to the power plant.
HOMER (CONT'D)
I wonder if I have time for a quick
snack. No Homer focus, there are
donuts in the breakroom.
HOMER (CONT'D)
Going to work on a Saturday? I
better get overtime for this.
HOMER (CONT'D)
Note to self: pick up milk on the
way home.
Losing the race triggers a fail state, causing the player to
restart.
EXT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT - NIGHT
Upon winning the race, Homer pulls up to the plant's parking
lot where Mr Burns and his trusty assistant SMITHERS await.
HOMER
Woo-hoo! Eat my Earth dust you
intergalactic jerks!
The UFO immediately overtakes Homer and hovers above the
plant's cooling towers, its beam still randomly turning
on/off.
KANG (O.S)
This is it Springfield. Prepare for
your imminent destruction!... In 3
minutes and a little bit.
SMITHERS
Simpson! What is the meaning of
this?
HOMER
Mr Smithers! It's not what it looks
like.
SMITHERS
You're telling me there isn't a
flying saucer above the nuclear
plant getting ready to destroy
Springfield in just over 3 minutes?
HOMER
Oh. I guess it's exactly what it
looks like.
(MORE)

7. 6.
HOMER (CONT'D)
Ah, I don't know how to stop this.
All I'm good for is causing
meltdowns. Wait, that's it!
MR BURNS
Smithers who is this strange man
and what is he babbling about?
SMITHERS
Homer Simpson sir, one of your
employees from Sector 7-G. This
better be good Simpson.
HOMER
If I caused a meltdown, we could
use the plant to destory the UFO!
MR BURNS
And the plant you ignoramous!
SMITHERS
Actually sir, our insurance does
cover extra-terristrial attack.
MR BURNS
... You must do it man I've never
met before! Be the hero we all know
you to be!
SMITHERS
Hmm. You'll need to expel the
radioactive gas from the cooling
towers to get a direct hit.
HOMER
You got it!
MR BURNS
And Simpson, if you should fail in
this task, you're fired.
HOMER
Aah!
OBJECTIVE 2: 'GET BUZZ COLA'
TIME LIMIT: 3:00. [Applies until end of mission].
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, MAIN HALL - CONTINUOUS
The beam sucks up the ceiling of the plant's main hall, as
well as various pipes and walkways that create platforms, as
Homer enters.

8. 7.
The tear reveals an upper level of the plant previously
inaccessible to the player.
The beam, now turning on/off in a repeated pattern, sucks up
workers in radiation suits.
HOMER
Aah! I'm at work on a Saturday!
Homer kicks the 'BUZZ COLA' soda machine just outside of the
beam's reach.
HOMER (CONT'D)
This cola should do the trick!
Better grab one more for later too.
OBJECTIVE 3: 'POUR THE BUZZ COLA ON YOUR WORK CONSOLE'
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, HOMER'S WORKSTATION - CONTINUOUS
Homer pours the buzz cola over his workstation.
HOMER
State of the art machinery, meet
cola.
A gentle buzz preceeds 'WARNING WARNING, DELICIOUS BEVERAGE
DETECTED IN WORK CONSOLE. MELTDOWN IMMINENT'. Like the UFO,
the whole plant is now in a state of emergency.
HOMER (CONT'D)
Wow, for once it's nice to hear
that and not be worried about
getting yelled at. Now to get up to
the towers.
OBJECTIVE 4: 'REACH THE POWER PLANT'S UPPER LEVELS'
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, MAIN HALL - CONTINUOUS
Homer runs back out into the main hall. The upper floors of
the areas that the player would be familiar with from
previous levels, have now been transformed by the effects of
the tractor beam.
New platforms have been created which the player will have to
navigate using the upwards pull of the beam. By successfully
timing these jumps, the player will be able to achieve the
height needed to reach the upper levels.
INTERRIM DIALOGUE: Homer is being sucked up by the beam.

9. 8.
HOMER
Wait until Lenny hears about this.
HOMER (CONT'D)
He-he. I feel so dainty.
HOMER (CONT'D)
Hmm. Was this always here?
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, UPPER HALLWAY - CONTINOUS
OBJECTIVE 5: 'GET TO THE TOWER CONTROL ROOM'
Homer emerges on an upper level in a tight hallway. Vents
burst with gas as Homer runs past them. In the background
behind a glass pane, we see PLANT EMPLOYEES being chased by
ROBOT WORKERS from the episode 'Last Exit to Springfield'.
HOMER
Oooh. Why did they have to build
this room so far away?
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, COOLING TOWER - CONTINOUS
The player is faced with another series of platforms to climb
with the assistance of the beam. Behind them the tower
rattles as pieces of debris fall to the ground far, far
below.
KODOS (O.S)
So what do you want to do after
this?
KANG (O.S)
We could do lunch. How about
Jupiter?
KODOS (O.S)
Ugh no, I always feel so heavy
whenever we go there.
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, TOWER CONTROL ROOM - CONTINOUS
CUTSCENE:
Homer runs into the control room but it's a maze of buttons,
dials, and lights.

10. 9.
HOMER
Which one of these damn buttons
does the thing? Aren't there any
staff around here?
There it is! A big unmissable red button marked 'EMERGENCY
RELEASE'. SLAM!
EXT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT - CONTINUOUS
The Nuclear Power Plant's towers erupt with green smoke.
Direct hit! The UFO is catapulted into the stratosphere with
the force of the blast, as if a coin that had been flicked.
KODOS
Damn you Earthlings! We'll get you
for this!
KANG
I too echo those sentiments!
INT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT, TOWER CONTROL ROOM - CONTINUOUS
Homer spots the flying saucer flip away until nought but a
speck in the sky.
HOMER
Woo-hoo! Take that whatever your
names are. Hmm, so this is what it
feels like to accomplish something
at work.
EXT. NUCLEAR POWER PLANT - NIGHT, LATER
Ashen haired news reporter KENT BROCKMAN reports live from
outside the power plant where a crowd has gathered to
celebrate Homer's victory.
KENT BROCKMAN
This is Kent Brockman reporting
live from Springfield Nuclear Power
Plant where moments ago, local
somebody Homer Simpson thwarted the
Alien Armageddeon that threatened
the very existence of our fair
city. I'm here with plant owner C.
Montgomery Burns.
(MORE)

11. 10.
KENT BROCKMAN (CONT'D)
Mr Burns, what say you to claims
that residents heard the aliens
saying that you had contaminated
our water supply with radiation?
MR BURNS
Now Kent, let's not take the moment
away from, from... Sampson! That's
it, and here he comes now.
Homer arrives panting as though out of breath from playing a
sports match.
KENT BROCKMAN
Ah yes, Homer. Tell us, how was the
experience?
HOMER
It was pretty rough Kent. For a
while it looked like I might not
make it, but I'm proud to say I
made it down all those stairs!
KENT BROCKMAN
Yes, and what do you make of
concerns that leaking a cloud of
radiation powerful enough to blast
away a flying saucer over our city
may cause lasting damange?
HOMER
What's gonna happen? Our skin's
gonna go a funny colour and we get
a weird amount of fingers? Pfft,
not likely.
KENT BROCKMAN
Well, you heard it here first
ladies and gentleman. Not likely.
For Channel 6 News, I'm -- hey let
go of that!
Homer grabs the mic as Kent and he wrestle for control of it.
HOMER
I wanna say hi to my buddies
Moe, Lenny, Barney, Carl. Hey
look at me, I'm on TV! Oh
yeah, Marge too. We did it
Marjourie!
KENT BROCKMAN (CONT'D)
Hey, give me that! Quit
hogging the, hey!

12. 11.
INT. SIMPSON'S HOME, LIVING ROOM - DAY
The wrestle for mic supremecy can be heard on the TV as
HOMER, MARGE, BART, LISA, and MAGGIE, all watch the report
the next day.
MARGE
Aw Homie, I made the top 5.
HOMER
Heh-heh, yeah.
LISA
Way to go Dad!
BART
I can't believe you actually did it
Homer!
MAGGIE
(sucks pacifier)
HOMER
Yeah... Let's see what else is on.
FAMILY
(in unison)
Yeah/good idea/ok/mm-hm.
Homer flips over the channel as the screen turns to static.