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TG survey deck v1
- 1. Confidential Quick Notes to Survey Takers: • Mock images are cut-and-pasted from Google searches, so they are not uniform or final. • Design, branding, and logo are in early draft stage. • For more context on how the images may look once art is commissioned, see notes in the margins. • Hope you have some fun and enjoy! 1
- 2. Confidential “Missing You” I just wanted to say… I’ve been missing you. Notes • Needs to be pop art style • Bullet holes should match their backgrounds better • Scope cross hairs could feel more retro/60s Front Inside 2
- 3. Confidential “Great to See You” Front Inside It was great seeing you Notes • Image could maybe be tighter on face, with absurdly large binoculars • Image of woman in towel could be slightly more revealing, larger and more noticeable, and cartoon. • Face should have a slight grin, and he should look more haggard, unshaven, hair tousled, etc. • Maybe he’s sweating or salivating lightly 3
- 4. Confidential “I Love Us – Male” Front Inside Happy Valentines Day Notes • Obviously the cartoons need to all match… • Taped character should look much worse, unshaven, hair unkempt. 4 I love us.
- 5. Confidential “I Love Us – Female” Front Inside Happy Valentines Day Notes • Obviously the cartoons need to all match… • Taped face should look much worse, hair unkempt, no makeup. 5 I love us.
- 6. Confidential “Great to see you, Flasher” Front Inside Great to see you 6 Hope you enjoyed seeing me too.
- 7. Confidential “Sorry for Your Loss” Front Inside I’m sorry for your loss Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art • Hair strands should be a little bigger/thicker and more obvious • Maybe there’s a creepy, home- made looking dress on it, possible some jewelry or other ornamentation? • Needs to look like it’s been loved and doted on for awhile. Finders keepers. 7
- 8. Confidential “Roses are red…” Front Inside Roses are Red Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art • Hair strands should be a little bigger/thicker and more obvious • Maybe there’s a creepy, home- made looking dress on it, possible some jewelry or other ornamentation? • Needs to look like it’s been loved and doted on for awhile. Violets are Blue I’ve fashioned a hair doll That smells of your shampoo. 8
- 9. Confidential “Thank You, Phone Number” Front Inside Thank You Notes • He should be holding a huge drill and have a belt tightly fastened around his neck. • His eyes should be bulging and his face should convey extreme excitement 9 For having a listed phone number. Mister, I can hear you breathing…I’m so frightened!
- 10. Confidential “It’s been ages…” Front Inside It’s been ages Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art. • He should be wearing sunglasses and wielding a machete and a bottle of chloroform. 10 Since you left your house.
- 11. Confidential “Happy Birthday…To Me #1” Front Inside Happy Birthday Notes • Both images need to be cartoon pop art 11 To me.
- 12. Confidential “Happy Birthday…To Me #2” Front Inside Happy Birthday 12 To me. Notes • Both images need to be cartoon pop art
- 13. Confidential “Happy Birthday…To Me #3” Front Inside Happy Birthday Notes • Need a better reflection image of a man either showering, shaving, or toweling off in his bathroom. • Should maybe be looking in through a window. 13 To me.
- 14. Confidential “Thinking of You” Front Inside Thinking of You Notes • Tissues and lotion should be pop art and look a bit classier • They should all be sitting on a fancy looking wooden nightstand or end table 14
- 15. Confidential “Welcome Home” Front Inside Welcome Home 15 To your worst nightmare. Notes • Images need to be cartoon pop art • Add unpacked moving boxes and clutter (as if they’ve just moved in) to the floor. • Want this to be a woman stalker, so no baclava, but instead show her hair and have her wearing a clown mask that covers just her face. • In addition to a knife, she’s also holding a mace, with spikes coming out of the ball.
- 16. Confidential “Troubling times, deep breath” Front Inside 16 Notes • Images need to be cartoon pop art • Should have Stalker Stephanie chloroforming a man and saying something like, “Sh-sh-sh-sh- sh…let it happen.” During these troubling times… It’s best to just take a deep breath.
- 17. Confidential “Merry Christmas #1” Front Inside Merry Christmas 17 But probably not. Notes • Images need to be cartoon pop art • Add unpacked moving boxes and clutter (as if they’ve just moved in) to the floor. • Want this to be a woman, so instead of a baclava, she’s wearing a Santa hat and fake beard • She’s holding an ice axe and a bloody ice skate.
- 18. Confidential Happy Birthday Drinks are on me. “Drinks on Me” Front Inside 18
- 19. Confidential “Merry Christmas, Balls” Front Inside Merry Christmas 19 I love your balls.
- 20. Confidential Hope you enjoy your special birthday surprise Or did I misread the situation? ”Birthday Surprise” Front Inside 20
- 21. Confidential Happy Anniversary ”Anniversary Dick” Front Inside 21 Hope your dick is ready to do some investigating tonight.
- 22. Confidential Happy Birthday ”Birthday Boobs” Front Inside 22 To a woman with one amazing rack. smile
- 23. Confidential I’m so sorry… About how much porn I still have on VHS. ”VHS Porn” Front Inside 23 Notes • Image needs to be cartoon pop art. • Zoom in a little bit so you can see names on tapes. • Will supply a list of silly porno titles.
- 24. Confidential Happy Birthday! Hope you’re grateful on this special day for running water and Instagram while millions in Africa starve. ”HBD, Starvation” Front Inside 24
- 25. Confidential Happy Graduation! Hope you don’t take your education for granted considering most children in South America can’t read or write. ”Graduation, Literacy” Front Inside 25
- 26. Confidential Congrats on your Marriage! Hoping you aren’t one of the 51% that divorce or 12% that experience domestic violence. ”Congrats, Marriage” Front Inside 26
- 27. Confidential Happy Birthday! One year on my birthday, I had to shoot my best horse. ”HBD, Horse” Front Inside 27
- 28. Confidential Happy Birthday! One year on my birthday, I got bit by a rattler. Ended up losing the toe. ”HBD, Rattler” Front Inside 28
- 29. Confidential Happy Birthday! One year on my birthday, our wagon train was attacked and my whole family got scalped. ”HBD, Indians” Front Inside 29
- 30. Confidential Happy Birthday! One year on my birthday, I fell down a mineshaft and broke both my legs. Had to eat my chaps to survive. ”HBD, Mineshaft” Front Inside 30
- 31. Confidential Happy Anniversary! I was married to my wife Clemmie for 23 years until she done got run over by a herd of spooked steer. ”Anniversary, Steer” Front Inside 31
- 32. Confidential Wishing you the Happiest of Birthdays Did you know that on his birthday, Henry VIII ate so many Cornish game hens that he collapsed into a pheasant-induced coma for a fortnight, what? Quite right, quite right. ”HBD, Henry VIII” Front Inside 32
- 33. Confidential May your anniversary be full of love and memories Did you know that on his 40th anniversary, former Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli had so much sexual intercourse, he required urgent medical attention, what? Indeed he did. ”Anniversary, Disraeli” Front Inside 33
- 34. Confidential Congratulations on the new family member! Did you know that Margaret Thatcher was infertile and tried to be artificially inseminated over a dozen times, what? Yes, yes, quite right. ”New birth, Margaret Thatcher” Front Inside 34
- 35. Confidential Happy Birthday You yoga-nazi queefmaster. “Yoga” Front Inside Goodness I love the smell of my own farts. 35 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 36. Confidential Happy Birthday You hipster douche nozzle. “Hipster” Front Inside Yeah, so I started a blog and it’s all about my balls. 36 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 37. Confidential Happy Birthday You bearded beer f@cker. “Beer Snob” Front Inside Cheers to my big beer and baby d!ck. 37
- 38. Confidential Happy Birthday You foodie f@ck muppet. “Foodie” Front Inside #wishing I had some f@cking #friends today. 38 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 39. Confidential Happy Birthday You Peloton-riding numbnuts. “Peloton” Front Inside I absolutely cannot feel my bonch. 39 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 40. Confidential Happy Birthday You paddle boarding pee pee cheeks. “Paddle Boarder” Front Inside I pee in my suit almost every time. 40
- 41. Confidential Happy Birthday You wooly whiskey ball bag. “Whiskey Snob” Front Inside 41 My beard smells like Monkey Shoulder…and turds. Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art • Want to convey an overly confident know-it-all bar tender in a whiskey bar whose self-image of a smooth-talking, intelligent, man of the whiskey world, is quite detached from the reality that he is a poorly paid hipster who lives at home and doesn’t bathe.
- 42. Confidential Happy Birthday You wine guzzling tw@t goblin. “Wine Snob” Front Inside 42 Mmmm, it’s dry... Like my hoo-haw.
- 43. Confidential Happy Birthday To a raging queen. “Raging Queen” Front Inside 43 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 44. Confidential Happy Birthday To a gigantic twink. “Gigantic Twink” Front Inside 44 Regular Twink You Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 45. Confidential Happy Birthday To my favorite power bottom. “Power Bottom” Front Inside 45 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 46. Confidential Happy Birthday To my dearest flaming fairy. “Flaming Fairy” Front Inside 46 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art • Would prefer a more traditional looking fairy, equipped with a badass flame thrower (that he/she is using)
- 47. Confidential Happy Anniversary Lesbos. “Lesbos” Front Inside 47 Notes • Map should be a cartoon, remove all other cities in Greece other than Athens, and all cities in Turkey You gals
- 48. Confidential Happy Birthday! I would enjoy licking peanut butter from anywhere on your person. ”Pets #1” Front Inside 48
- 49. Confidential Happy Anniversary I look forward to dry humping your leg this evening. ”Pets #2” Front Inside 49
- 50. Confidential Happy Anniversary To someone who likes a good bone as much as I do. ”Pets #3” Front Inside 50
- 51. Confidential Happy Birthday I am quite fond of your cock. ”Pets #4” Front Inside 51
- 52. Confidential Happy Anniversary Looking forward to some doggy style this evening. ”Pets #5” Front Inside 52 Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 53. Confidential Happy Anniversary I love it when you talk dirty. ”Pets #6” Front Inside 53 Squawk! I took a mammoth dump in my cage this afternoon. Squawk! Notes • Image should be cartoon pop art
- 54. Confidential Happy Birthday! My dad said that when he stands next to you at a urinal he feels like less of a man. ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #1” Front Inside 54
- 55. Confidential Happy Birthday! My mom says that you have tits for days. Front Inside 55 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #2”
- 56. Confidential Happy Birthday! My dad said you have an ass that will not quit. Front Inside 56 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #3”
- 57. Confidential Happy Birthday! My dad said that when you take your shirt off he’s worried about my mom leaving him. Front Inside 57 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #4”
- 58. Confidential Happy Birthday! My mom says if she had a hall pass she’d use it on you. Front Inside 58 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #5”
- 59. Confidential Happy Birthday!Front Inside 59 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #6” My mom says that if my dad had your biceps they’d still sleep together.
- 60. Confidential Happy Birthday!Front Inside 60 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #7” My dad said with your cheekbones and jawline he’d have a better life.
- 61. Confidential Happy Birthday! My parents said they’d love to have a threesome with you some time. Front Inside 61 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #8”
- 62. Confidential Happy Birthday! My parents say when they grow up they want a house like yours. Front Inside 62 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #9”
- 63. Confidential Happy Birthday! My mom said you can really hang a shirt. ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #10” Front Inside 63
- 64. Confidential Happy Birthday! My dad is ashamed to lift weights with you. Front Inside 64 ”Kids Say Funny Stuff #11”