Virtual Talk with Author & Pastor Bruce Reyes-Chow on Everyday Kindness on 03/22/2022. Meet the author of In Defense of Kindness, Pastor Bruce Reyes-Chow! These days we view kindness as an inert act based on the absence of being a jerk, or we see it as heroic and herculean, beyond the reach and capability of mere mortals. But what if kindness was a practice we could each choose, every day, as a way to experience community and wholeness in new, life-giving, world-changing ways? Reyes-Chow shows how being kind (which is different than being nice) has the power to transform our relationships in all arenas of our life – from the internet to the public square, from those closest to us to those we find it hardest to be kind to, from justice work on the streets to meetings in the boardroom, and from the line at the coffee shop to the line for school drop-off. Defense of Kindness will jumpstart your heart and inspire you to practice kindness as a daily discipline, grounded in the idea that each person is created and complex and worthy of dignity and respect. Join the kindness movement and help heal the world! This author talk is inspired by this year’s Silicon Valley Reads’ themes of Kindness, Resilience, and Hope.

1. KINDNESS
Santa Clara City Library
Author Series
March 22, 2022

2. ABOUT
BRUCE

3. ABOUT
BRUCE
● Generation X, “Whatever"

4. ABOUT
BRUCE
● Generation X, “Whatever"
● Presbyterian Pastor rooted
in community organizing.

5. ABOUT
BRUCE
● Generation X, “Whatever"
● Presbyterian Pastor rooted
in community organizing.
● Lived and worked in San
Francisco for 30 years.

6. ABOUT
BRUCE
● Generation X, “Whatever"
● Presbyterian Pastor rooted
in community organizing.
● Lived and worked in San
Francisco for 30 years.
● Pastor at @FPCPaloAlto.

7. ABOUT
BRUCE
● Generation X, “Whatever"
● Presbyterian Pastor rooted
in community organizing.
● Lived and worked in San
Francisco for 30 years.
● Pastor at @FPCPaloAlto.
● Three children (25, 20, 18)

8. ABOUT
BRUCE
● Generation X, “Whatever"
● Presbyterian Pastor rooted
in community organizing.
● Lived and worked in San
Francisco for 30 years.
● Pastor at @FPCPaloAlto.
● Three children (25, 20, 18)

9. MEDIOCRE AT A
GREAT MANY THINGS
● Rule #2: Don't Be an Asshat: An Official
Handbook for Raising Parents and Children
● But I Don't See You as Asian: Curating
Conversations about Race
● The Definitive-ish Guide for Using Social
Media in the Church
● In Defense of Kindness: Why It Matters,
How It Changes Our Lives, and How It Can
Save the World

10. AGENDA
I / Defining Kindness
What does kindness mean and NOT mean?
II / Kindness and our Souls
Kindness as acts of self-care and healing?
III / Kindness and Other Humans
Extending kindness to those around us?
IV / Kindness and the Common Good
Envisioning kindness as a discipline that
changes the world?

11. WHEN YOU
THINK OF
KINDNESS?

12. Habit
Tactic
Event
Person
Aspiration

13. KINDNESS
A Definition.
Santa Clara City Library
March 22, 2022

14. REV. DR.
MR. FRED
ROGERS

15. ESTEBAN
DE LOS
REYES

16. KINDNESS
DEFINED
To be kind is to accept that each
person is a created and complex
human being—and to treat them as
if you believe this to be true.
Kindness is choice to honor the
humanity (holiness) that lies
within each and every one of us.

17. KINDNESS
DEFINED
To be kind is to accept that each
person is a created and complex
human being—and to treat them as
if you believe this to be true.
TOWARDS OURSELVES.

18. KINDNESS
DEFINED
To be kind is to accept that each
person is a created and complex
human being—and to treat them as
if you believe this to be true.
TOWARD OTHERS.

19. KINDNESS
DEFINED
To be kind is to accept that each
person is a created and complex
human being—and to treat them as
if you believe this to be true.
TOWARD THE WORLD.

20. KINDNESS
DEFINED
To be kind is to accept that each
person is a created and complex
human being—and to treat them as
if you believe this to be true.
KINDNESS NOT AS/JUST NICE.

21. KINDNESS
When and What is Enough?
Santa Clara City Library
March 22, 2022

22. Enough
…sometimes the kind thing to do
for everyone is to know when
and what is enough and walk
away, at least for a time.

23. Enough
…sometimes the kind thing to do
for everyone is to know when
and what is enough and walk
away, at least for a time.

24. Enough
…sometimes the kind thing to do
for everyone is to know when
and what is enough and walk
away, at least for a time.

25. Enough
…sometimes the kind thing to do
for everyone is to know when
and what is enough and walk
away, at least for a time.

26. Enough
…sometimes the kind thing to do
for everyone is to know when
and what is enough and walk
away, at least for a time.

27. KINDNESS AND
OTHER HUMANS
Extending kindness to those around us?
Santa Clara City Library
March 22, 2022

28. KINDNESS
DEFINED
To be kind is to accept that each
person is a created and complex
human being—and to treat them as
if you believe this to be true.
Kindness is choice to honor the
humanity (holiness) that lies
within each and every one of us.

29. NOT OUR
BEST SELVES
Especially during times of stress
and anxiety (Pandemic
anyone?), being humble and
reflective enough to know that
none of us are are best selves
right now is an act of kindness.

30. WE CARE
WHAT WE
CARE ABOUT
Remember that we all view the
world through different lenses.

31. EVERY DAY
KINDNESS
Notice where you are least kind
as you move through the day,
and shift the behavior.

32. MAKE IT
A HABIT
Choose to move the through the
world with a lens of kindness.

33. PRACTICE
APOLOGIZING
Remove transactional nature of
forgiveness and apologies.

34. ONLINE
Be consistent with online
interaction.

35. DISCOURSE AND
DISAGREEMENT
…dipping into the attack well of
body-shaming, racism,
misogyny, and ableism is just
lazy and we play to the
bot-fueled, troll-fed, worst of
who humans can be.

36. KINDNESS AND THE
COMMON GOOD
Envisioning kindness as a discipline that
changes the world?
Santa Clara City Library
March 22, 2022

37. CHOOSING
TO BE KIND
There are three ways to
ultimate success:
The first way is to be kind.
The second way is to be kind.
The third way is to be kind.
—Rev. Dr. Fred Rogers

38. PROTEST
May our call to civil discourse be
more about listening to the
genuine struggles of our human
sisters, brothers, siblings,
neighbors, and strangers than
about protecting our own
spaces of security.

39. REDEMPTION
& HUMANITY
…we force those who are acting
as agents for the system to see
us as human beings and question
what they are doing rather than
see us as ideological opposition
that can be treated with
detachment and disregard.

40. THE WHOLE
BODY
Humanity has known far too much COVID
sickness, death, and grief, so for those
choosing not to be vaccinated, I'm choosing
to let go of my judgmentalism and
welcoming any way folks may come to
choose differently. Suffering is not partisan
or political, so my ability to show empathy
should not be either.

41. THE BODY

42. CHOOSING
TO BE KIND
Kindness is not a journey for the
meek and mild. For those of us
who have been steeped in ways of
being that are not kind, it takes
tremendous energy to purge
ourselves of patterns and
behaviors that are not kind. Every
day we have to choose to commit
to live out kindness that day.

43. ALL THE LINKS
Today’s Slides:
www.slideshare.net/breyeschow
on the Socials:
@breyeschow on all the things:
Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, etc.
eMail:
bruce@reyes-chow.com
Blatant Shilling of My Stuff
https://linktr.ee/breyeschow

45. ALL THE LINKS
Today’s Slides:
www.slideshare.net/breyeschow
on the Socials:
@breyeschow on all the things:
Instagram, Twitter, Faceback, etc.
eMail:
bruce@reyes-chow.com
Blatant Shilling of My Stuff
https://linktr.ee/breyeschow