The document discusses strategies for coping with difficult situations using a "tool box" approach rather than a "strainer" approach. The tool box includes techniques like self-acceptance, using a mental shield to not take others' words personally, coping skills, and addressing issues through preferences rather than demands. Specific tools mentioned are using a dollar bill and pizza as metaphors, avoiding "awfulizing" situations, and focusing on preferences that allow rational problem solving rather than demands that close off thinking.

1. Kelley PeelKelley Peel
Counselor R-P IntermediateCounselor R-P Intermediate
ToolboxToolbox

2. Tool BoxTool Box
SituationSituation
Tool Box vs.Tool Box vs. StrainerStrainer
Feel - BehaviorFeel - Behavior

3. Self-AcceptanceSelf-Acceptance
 Dollar BillDollar Bill
 PizzaPizza

4. ShieldShield
 What you say and do is about you. WhatWhat you say and do is about you. What
others say and do is about them.others say and do is about them.
 Careful for that hook!Careful for that hook!
 Crazy Eighted! What wasn’t yours, nowCrazy Eighted! What wasn’t yours, now
is.is.

5. How Not To AwfulizeHow Not To Awfulize
 Worst ever………………Bad but I canWorst ever………………Bad but I can
COPECOPE
 Awfulizing:Awfulizing:
 Reduces problem solving abilitiesReduces problem solving abilities
 Doesn’t improve the situationDoesn’t improve the situation
 Find your own yard stickFind your own yard stick

6. Demands vs.Demands vs.
PreferencesPreferences
 DemandsDemands
 Closes off thinkingCloses off thinking
 Angry, angry, angryAngry, angry, angry
 PreferencesPreferences
 Allows us to address issues rationally –Allows us to address issues rationally –
more resultsmore results
 I can functionI can function

7. SituationSituation
Tool BoxTool Box
 Self-AcceptanceSelf-Acceptance
 ShieldShield
 CopeCope
 PreferencePreference
StrainerStrainer
 Mixing Pizza w/Mixing Pizza w/
DollarDollar
 Hooked, CrazyHooked, Crazy
EightedEighted
 AwfulizingAwfulizing
 DemandsDemands