What couples need to know to keep their marriages successful and still in love with each other even after years

1. Marriage success
guideFor Everyone Regardless Of Age, Background Or Education
4 tips for
avoiding divorce
How To Overcome
Co-Dependency In
Your Marriage?
Tips to add
spice and love
How To Save
Marriage When
Facing Divorce?

2. Contents
1. 4 Tips For Avoiding Divorce 1
2. How To Overcome Co-Dependency In Your Marriage 4
3. Tips To Add Spice And Love Into Your Marriage 6
4. How To Save Marriage When Facing Divorce 9

3. 1
4 tips for avoiding
divorce
AREALITY OF MODERN RELATIONSHIPS IS THE KNOWLEDGE THAT DIVORCE
statistics have been steadily escalating in recent years.
Even now, all marriages have between a 40 and 50 percent chance of divorce, which
increases for second and third marriages, which is why it's more important than ever to
have the necessary skills to ensure your relationship is secure against the threat of
divorce.
There are steps you can take to actually build a strong, stable marriage and avoid divorce.
Here are some key steps to apply to your marriage:
1. Start By Understanding And Being Informed
You can never be too informed about tools, methods and studies about building
successful marriages.
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4. 2 MARRIAGE SUCCESS GUIDE
Understand the risk factors like your age and maturity at marriage can determine how
successful it will be, the anatomy of an affair and what you can do after infidelity.
Understand the success factors like the personal and psychological circumstances that
will influence your marriage, what are the tools and approaches available to you in
dealing with conflict, and numerous other relevant data.
All this information is readily available to you whether through self-help material,
through a counsellor, support group or other venues.
In fact, we have made it our commitment to provide these to you in different formats to
help you make the best marriage you can.
The thing is, remember, this is information is not available for you to begin hyper-
psychoanalyzing your relationship, yourself and your partner.
It is not a matter of spewing trivia for the sake of conversation information is there for
you to ponder over and internalize to help you transform yourself and your marriage.
That includes maturing to such a point that you become more competent in your
knowledge but more prudent in approach.
2. A Solid Marriage Is One In Which You Never Stop Putting In Effort To Make It Better
And Better
Good marriages are made. They don't just fall from heaven or off the pages of a romance
novel.
Unfortunately, many couples still believe that everything will be just fine after the
wedding.
Well, the wedding may have been absolutely lovely but the hard work of the marriage
comes right after!
When the prospect of years together crops up, you just cannot slack off.
No, it is not a matter of stressing yourself trying to please your spouse daily.
It is a mutual commitment to be other-focused to communicate, spend time together, plan
and set goals as a couple, lay down guidelines and sticking to them, lay down guidelines
and knowing when to change them, dealing with kids and other significant issues.
And remember to keep up the romance, passion and intimacy in your marriage.
Even if some days, you both are not in sync.
Interestingly, a couple who has put in the effort develop an almost 6th sense about the
others needs and desires.
Now that is effort well worth it.

5. 4 Tips For Avoiding Divorce 3
3. Commitment
Notice that we did not say happiness as one of key factors in making a successful
marriage.
It is not even purely love.
You see, happiness comes, goes and takes many forms.
Love grows, wanes, develops and is a given in marriage relationship.
Commitment, though, is something to invest in, to muster, to understand, to renew from
time to time.
This is the one constant through the happy and sad times, through the passionate and
lovelorn times.
Commitment make people want to stay, make them feel they ought to stay, and/or they
have to stay.
What many couples don't realize is that commitment is a decision. It is an act of choice
within one mature individual that translates to how this person will be present for
another.
It is neither a whim nor an extra.
But rather the true foundation of any relationship.
4. The Power Lies With You
I always say that mature individuals make mature, lasting marriages.
What people fail to realize is that, in anything, even a love relationship and more so in
one, you can take responsibility and choose your actions.
When the going gets tough, you have the choice to either react to the situation you're in
or to be swept away by a tide of emotion.
When faced by temptation, the temptation will not make you 'do it' ' you will. It all lies
with you. A happy, fulfilling relationship begins with you.
This means that you also have a lot of self-work to do.
Work out your issues, mature, learns to love yourself.
These are all part of growing up and growing into a successful marriage.
Even when your partner has issues of his or her own or buckles under the pressure of a
crisis, there is still you.

6. 2
How to overcome co-
dependency in your marriage?
ARE YOU MARRIED TO AN EMOTIONAL ADDICT OR SOMEONE WITH DEEP
personal issues?
Is your marriage or family life going through a difficult time because of problems,
financial concerns, abuse, or caring for a physically or emotionally handicapped family
member?
If so, do you find yourself making excuses for these issues? Calling in sick for your
alcoholic husband?
Taking over the housework because your poor spouse is just too depressed to help?
Denying that abuse is going on in your own home? Do you find yourself taking charge
and bearing the burdens of the entire marriage or family?
You may be a co-dependent and this is a serious issue in marriages and families.
4

7. How To Overcome Co-Dependency In Your Marriage 5
You may have learned to be co-dependent due to your family background.
It happened in your family so you tend to be attracted to the same situation once you
marry.
You may have learned behaviours such as making excuses, tuning out, controlling,
excessive caretaking, being hyper-vigilant because you feel that you should do something
to save your family from shame or to at least diffuse the situation and keep the peace.
You also do this because you desire to be needed and fear of doing anything that would
change the relationship.
Unfortunately, while such behaviours may reduce conflict and tension for the meantime,
they won't help for the long term.
All you are doing is reinforcing the situation and even, allowing it to worsen. You are also
allowing yourself to be lost within the situation and, in the long run, may find yourself no
longer able to cope.
What can you do to overcome co-dependency in your marriage and family life?
If you are reading this short article and have come to recognize that you do have this
problem - congratulations.
That is the first step in beginning to overcome co-dependency. Admit that you have a
problem and take steps to begin changing it. It will require both self-help and professional
help.
More often than not, these issues stem from deep seated psychological problems. Don’t
let shame keep you from seeking the help of a counsellor or psychologist.
Additionally, there are programs similar to Co-dependent’s Anonymous that will help you
process your issues and provide you with tools how to overcome them.
Your partner or family member may also need professional help, especially if they are
battling clinical conditions or addiction.
Work at getting them the help they need, whether they want it or not.
Is Your Marriage Is Still
Going Downhill After
Reading This?
If So, Go Here Now!

8. 3
Tips to add spice and
love into your marriage
WE HAVE HEARD THE TERM 2 OLD MARRIEDS BEFORE.
Most of us younger married couples harbour dreams of getting to that point.
Some of us find it unappealing and unexciting.
After all, what would you always prefer?
A marriage as comfy as an old sock or the one hyped up in romantic novels and
comedies?
Interestingly, it does take years of passion, love and intimacy to get to the point where a
couple is so comfortable with each other that they finish each other's sentences and
depend on each other.
6

9. Tips To Add Spice And Love Into Your Marriage 7
Want to know a secret?
Studies say that couples like these have an even better sex life in their marital futures
than the ones with all the passion at the start then burn out later on.
Why?
Because these savvy couples don't let up on keeping the intimacy, passion and spice in
their marriages.
They have built it up through the years to what we can call as a marriage art form.
How can you learn these spicy tips to keep the love in your marriage?
Here are some of them!
1. Prioritize Each Other
This is the mother of all tips.
Successful old marrieds have come to realize that above all relationships each one has in
their lives' even kids, own parents, siblings, co-workers, best buddies, a couple has to
prioritize their marriage.
Why?
Ultimately, it will be just the both of you going through life together and you made the
promise to do so.
People fail to realize that your spouse is your first and foremost priority!
They allow their marriages to get caught in between squabbling kids, family politics and
even work obligations. Big no-no.
Your spouse has to know that he or she can trust on you to do what's best for the
relationship and vice versa, that he or she is your best friend and will never let you down.
When you work as a team, you face the obligations you have towards others as a team.
2. Don't Give Up Dating Each Other!
The humdrum of life, kids and laundry can take a way time for each other.
Don't allow it!
If you are the spontaneous type, rethink your understanding because you really do have
to set a date to date your spouse and keep it regular!
You can even take turns planning surprise dates.
They don't have to be grand, they just have to be time off to feed number one above.

10. 8 MARRIAGE SUCCESS GUIDE
And, don't forget, they are the same way you are creative in dating your spouse, learn to
be creative in the bedroom!
3. Fight Fair And Laugh Always.
You might think the elements in this tip are not related but they absolutely are!
It is all a matter of attitude.
How do you see fighting or arguing in your relationship?
How do you see humor?
If you can inject both with a positive approach always, then you realize that it all comes
from the inside.
Learn how to fight constructively with the correct communication tools. And don't take
fighting too seriously.
Laugh with your spouse at your annoying little fights. See them both as essential to your
marriage.
4. Talk, Discuss And Agree To Disagree!
As a couple, it is better if you share a majority of your beliefs and perspectives about life.
But, even if you don't, talking, discussing and bantering are important in keeping the
spice in your marriage.
You can even agree to disagree and that's that!
The more you talk, the more you get to know what your spouse is thinking and feeling.
The more you get to know the real person behind the words.
The more opportunities you find that you still surprise each other after all!

11. 4
How to save marriage
when facing divorce?
THERE ARE MANY REASONS WHY A ONCE COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP WOULD
degenerate to one partner asking for a divorce.
It could have been:
- an affair
- having been separated by a long distance for lengths of time
- conflict
- behavioural issues or psychological problems of one spouse
- even unmanaged addictions.
9

12. 10 MARRIAGE SUCCESS GUIDE
Whatever of these problems may be what is seen on the surface, the bottom line is that
usually, barring any abuse or psychological problems that are best handled by a
professional, a couple find themselves in danger of divorce when there is a loss of:
- communication,
- love
- and intimacy
in the marital relationship.
Conflict or anger itself does not have to cause an irreparable rift between partners.
With good communication skills and a shared commitment to a marriage, even these are
surmountable.
However, at that point where one partner is at the brink of abandoning the relationship,
how can the remaining partner save their marriage?
If you are at the point where your spouse has asked for a divorce, what can you do?
You must realize first that, you do have a choice.
Often, when confronted by a crisis, we find ourselves backed into a corner thinking we
have no choice in the matter.
How can we change the situation when it involves another person's feelings or decisions?
While we cannot, must not and in no way manipulate, blackmail or threaten our partner
into changing their mind, we can actually control how we react to the situation.
If anything, you must realize that you still have control over yourself.
You have the opportunity to look inward and take responsibility for your own feelings
and actions and even have the chance to take personal inventory of what your partner is
trying to tell you.
Are there points in your marriage that must be changed? If so, respond appropriately and
proactively.
Here Is the thing.
You can choose to wallow in pain and anger or you can choose to become even more
positive and loving towards your spouse.
You can choose to blame and shame your partner.
Or you can choose to take stock, be accountable for where your marriage is and move on
towards a more fulfilling, happy you.
Yes, you heard me.

13. How To Save Your Marriage When Your Partner Wants Divorce 11
You can choose to be fulfilled and happy in the midst of crisis.
Even if your spouse is stubborn and unresponsive, you can still change yourself and
become as engaging, positive and proactive as you were when you first fell in love.
Usually, at the struggling stage of a relationship, one or both couples would look back and
miss the good old days where it was easy to be together.
You can capture those days again ' and even add to them with your own current maturity
and growth.
After all, you did not spend those years after the wedding for nothing.
You and your spouse have made a huge investment into this partnership and your
intention to stay in the marriage through positive loving actions, through open
communication and strengthened commitment can help your spouse refocus his view on
what you once committed to.
Become a loving person again by caring for your spouse in the little everyday things.
Be there for him or her when before you may have been too much of a workaholic.
Set aside intimate time just for your partner alone whereas previously, you may have let
the kids take up too much of your time.
Then, when the time comes that you are able to open communication with your spouse
and actually sit down and discuss the crisis you are in asking him or her if he or she
realizes just how much effort a divorce could entail?
Does your spouse actually realize that a divorce has emotional, financial, logistical and
physical consequences?
A divorce brings change and it is definitely not to be taken lightly.
If your spouse wants a divorce, is he or she prepared to embrace this change?
Finally, you also have the option to involve a third party or mediator to help you and your
spouse through this situation.
If the situation is truly serious then by all means, get help.
This is not the time to let your pride get in the way.
A professional counsellor, trusted elder or neutral friend can help in putting things into
perspective between you and your partner and may even help unlock deep seated
concerns or issues.
For all you know, it may be as simple as your partner wanting more attention or more
ways to open up to you.

14. Is Your Marriage Is Still
Going Downhill After
Reading This?
If So, Go Here Now!