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Know Your Inner Mammal
dopamine endorphinoxytocinserotonin
Loretta G. Breuning, PhD. Inner Mammal Institute
Neuroscience of Happy Relationships
Your friends & family are mammals
Your coworkers are mammals
Your lovers are mammals
You are
mammal
too
The brain chemicals that make us feel
good are inherited from earlier mammals
dopamine endorphinoxytocinserotonin
They’re controlled by brain
structures inherited from
earlier mammals
Your limbic system
doesn’t process
language so it
can’t tell you in
words why it
turns the chemicals
on & off
The ups & downs of our brain chemicals are
hard to make sense of until you know
how they work in other mammals
Happy relationships start with
knowing your happy chemicals
Our brain evolved to promote survival,

not to make you feel good
Your brain saves the happy chemicals
for things that promote survival
But it defines survival in a
quirky way
1. It cares about the
survival of your genes
2. It relies on neural
pathways built in youth
Good feelings turn on when
you do things that:
1. Spread your genes in the state of nature

(ie. attracting mates and nurturing children)
2. Triggered happy chemicals in your youth

(because a neural pathway developed)
We all do
quirky
things to
stimulate
our happy
chemicals
When other people do quirky things

to feel good, you notice
But when you do quirky things, it
feels like you are just trying to survive
Yikes!
It’s not easy
being
mammal!
Our big
human
cortex is
good at
‘splainin’
But if you want to feel good,
you have to get it from your
mammal brain
Happy = survival

to your mammal brain, so your quest for

happy chemicals always feels urgent
When your happy chemicals droop, your
mammal brain thinks it’s a survival threat
You don’t think that in words.
You think it by releasing cortisol.
To make life even harder,
happy chemicals are released in short spurts,
so you always have to do more to get more
And the brain habituates to the
rewards you have, so it takes

“new and improved”
to really trigger them
Everyone is trying to do things that
stimulate their happy chemicals
dopamine endorphin oxytocinserotonin
With the neural pathways
built from
their unique
life
experience
When you know the special
job of each happy chemical,
life makes sense
dopamine endorphinoxytocinserotonin
You can feel good about yourself
and others
Dopamine
is the great feeling

that a reward is at hand
Dopamine
releases energy for the chase
When you expect to meet a need,

your dopamine is released
Neurons connect when

dopamine flows, which wires you to
seek more in the same way
Your expectations are neural
pathways built from your past
dopamine experiences
Dopamine
droops
once you
get the
reward,
until

you set
your sights
on another
reward
Your brain
habituates to the
rewards you have
so you seek
“new & improved”
for dopamine
Oxytocin
is often called
the “love chemical”
Oxytocin rewards you with
a good feeling when you find
safety in numbers
Oxytocin is stimulated by
touch,

trust,
birth,

and

sex
Trusting everyone
does not promote
survival.
Your brain makes
careful decisions
about when to turn

on the oxytocin.
Your brain defines trust with
neural pathways built from your
past oxytocin experiences
Oxytocin stops when you’re
isolated, which makes it feel like a
survival threat
Serotonin
is the pleasure of
social dominance
Serotonin
is not
aggression
but calm
confidence in
your strength.
“I will get the
banana.”
Serotonin is released when you
believe you can assert and prevail
Your brain defines social dominance
with neural pathways built from
your past serotonin experiences
Serotonin

is soon
reabsorbed,

so we are
always looking
for ways to
stimulate more
Endorphin masks pain

so you can do what

it takes to survive
Endorphin is

“endogenous morphine”
it evolved for
emergencies,
not partying
Endorphin is triggered by
pain, and vigorous exertion
We are NOT designed to
inflict pain on ourselves.
We are designed for survival.
We all struggle
• Our happy chemicals droop

• To get more of one,

we risk losing another, or
triggering cortisol

• We feel threatened easily
It’s not easy being
mammal!
Put two mammals together
and it’s even harder!
Blame
• Your inner mammal thinks others are the problem

• You can prove it!

Your cortex is designed to find external evidence
to explain your internal alarm signals
• You feel threatened constantly if you let your
brain do this
Relationships improve when
you know your inner mammal
Self-acceptance
Acceptance of others
We all strive to stimulate happy
chemicals and relieve threat
chemicals in whatever way worked
in our unique past experience
We all struggle to feel good with
a brain that saves the happy
chemicals for survival moments
Self-acceptance
1. I am a mammal
2. My happy chemicals don’t flow all the time
so I am urgently motivated to do things that
trigger them
3. They’re controlled by neural pathways built
from my past experience
4. I can build new pathways by feeding my
brain new experiences- if I invest the effort.
Acceptance of others
1. My friends are mammals. My family. My
partner. My co-workers. My fellow citizens.
2. Their happy chemicals don’t flow all the time
so they are urgently motivated to do things
that trigger them
3. Their neural pathways are built from their past
experience.
4. They can build new pathways by feeding their
brain new experiences- if they invest the effort.
What new pathways?
New happy pathways
dopamine 

positive expectations about my own steps

serotonin
stop thinking others are putting me down

oxytocin
build trust actively in small steps instead of
bonding around common enemies
1. Personal agency
• I focus on steps toward
rewards because dopamine
makes me feel good when I
succeed.
• When my path is blocked, it
may feel like a survival threat.
• I can remind myself that my
survival is not actually
threatened. I’m just a
dopamine-seeking mammal.
2. Social comparison
• We mammals keep comparing ourselves to others
• When your one-up position is threatened, it feels
like a survival threat
• You can remind yourself that your survival

is not actually threatened. You are just a

serotonin-seeking mammal.
3. Trust and betrayal
• We mammals seek the safety of social trust.
• When others disappoint our expectations,

it feels like a survival threat.
• I can remind myself that my survival is not
actually threatened. My inner mammal is just
seeking oxytocin.
Repeat these new thoughts and

a new pathway will build
The electricity in your brain
will have a new place to flow!
Step-by-step instructions in
Habits of a Happy Brain
Retrain your
brain to boost
your serotonin,
dopamine,
oxytocin and
endorphin levels
Get the full story at
InnerMammalInstitute.org
videos, podcasts, blogs, books,
infographics, slideshows, & training

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Know Your Inner Mammal: The Neuroscience of Happy Relationships