This document contains a collection of poems and news snippets on various humorous topics. Some of the topics covered include: donkeys being ordered to wear diapers in Kenya; a man living a normal life despite having an unusually small brain; Kenyan ministers complaining of having no work; and Spanish cows preferring classical music to rock or jazz. The poems use wordplay, irony and unusual topics to elicit amusement.
Book 4 harry potter and the goblet of fireTiron Renata
This document is an excerpt from the book Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling. It summarizes the backstory of the mysterious Riddle House and the unsolved murders that took place there decades ago of the Riddle family. The gardener Frank Bryce was suspected of the crime but never convicted. To this day, the village suspects Frank and the house remains abandoned.
Harry potter and the goblet of fire 402438Wahaj Khan Pti
This document summarizes the first chapter of the Harry Potter book "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire". It describes the setting of the Riddle House, an old mansion that was once grand but is now run down and empty. The villagers believe something strange happened there 50 years ago when the Riddle family was found dead with no apparent cause. The gardener Frank Bryce was suspected but never convicted. The summary introduces the main events and setting of the first chapter.
Little Red Riding Hood is a 10th century European folk tale that was edited and published by the Grimm Brothers in 1857. It tells the story of a young girl, Little Red Riding Hood, who is tricked by a wolf while taking cake and wine to her grandmother's house in the woods. The wolf arrives first and eats the grandmother, then waits for Little Red Riding Hood in her disguise. When Little Red Riding Hood arrives, she too is eaten by the wolf. The 2011 film Red Riding Hood, starring Amanda Seyfried, adapts this classic fairy tale into a romance horror story set in a medieval village threatened by a werewolf. It explores the themes of the original but with additional characters
This document discusses ambiguity, puns, and visual ambiguity through examples. It begins by providing ambiguous examples of fruit and poems. It then discusses linguistic and syntactic ambiguity through examples of ambiguous sentences, signs, and marketing slogans. Many examples of puns are given, including in business names, jokes, comic strips, and speeches. The document concludes by discussing optical illusions and their ability to create visual ambiguity.
This document discusses various ghost stories and urban legends from York, England. It summarizes accounts of several reported ghosts in historic buildings in York, including a young Victorian girl who fell to her death on a staircase. It also examines modern urban legends, like Bloody Mary and Slenderman, which originated online and gained widespread popularity through digital sharing and adaptation. The document reflects on the nature of new urban legends and their relationship to viral internet memes. In conclusion, it notes that "The Licked Hand" is a particularly creepy tale, while Slenderman could inspire an interesting creative project given the real-life killings said to be influenced by the fictional character.
The ghost of Canterville Chase has haunted the estate for 300 years but the current owners, the Otis family from America, are not afraid of ghosts. The ghost tries to scare the Otis family but the children are not frightened. Virginia, one of the daughters, feels bad for the ghost and wants to help him find peace so he can rest. She goes with the ghost to the haunted cavern, despite warnings. Eventually, through Virginia's kindness and belief in mercy, the ghost is released from his haunting of Canterville Chase.
The document summarizes several chapters from the story "The Canterville Ghost". It introduces the American Otis family who move into Canterville Castle in England, despite being warned that it is haunted. Strange events begin to occur, with a blood stain reappearing on the floor each morning. The family encounters the Canterville Ghost and attempt to clean the stain, angering the ghost. Subsequent interactions show the family is not afraid and plays tricks on the ghost, wounding his pride. Virginia later feels sorry for the lonely ghost who has not slept in 300 years.
1. The document discusses ambiguity, puns, and visual ambiguity through examples from literature, wordplay, and syntax.
2. It provides definitions of puns, examples of puns in marketing, literature, and names, and discusses ambiguity on multiple linguistic levels.
3. The document concludes by mentioning the International Save the Pun Foundation and several websites dedicated to puns.
Book 4 harry potter and the goblet of fireTiron Renata
This document is an excerpt from the book Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling. It summarizes the backstory of the mysterious Riddle House and the unsolved murders that took place there decades ago of the Riddle family. The gardener Frank Bryce was suspected of the crime but never convicted. To this day, the village suspects Frank and the house remains abandoned.
Harry potter and the goblet of fire 402438Wahaj Khan Pti
This document summarizes the first chapter of the Harry Potter book "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire". It describes the setting of the Riddle House, an old mansion that was once grand but is now run down and empty. The villagers believe something strange happened there 50 years ago when the Riddle family was found dead with no apparent cause. The gardener Frank Bryce was suspected but never convicted. The summary introduces the main events and setting of the first chapter.
Little Red Riding Hood is a 10th century European folk tale that was edited and published by the Grimm Brothers in 1857. It tells the story of a young girl, Little Red Riding Hood, who is tricked by a wolf while taking cake and wine to her grandmother's house in the woods. The wolf arrives first and eats the grandmother, then waits for Little Red Riding Hood in her disguise. When Little Red Riding Hood arrives, she too is eaten by the wolf. The 2011 film Red Riding Hood, starring Amanda Seyfried, adapts this classic fairy tale into a romance horror story set in a medieval village threatened by a werewolf. It explores the themes of the original but with additional characters
This document discusses ambiguity, puns, and visual ambiguity through examples. It begins by providing ambiguous examples of fruit and poems. It then discusses linguistic and syntactic ambiguity through examples of ambiguous sentences, signs, and marketing slogans. Many examples of puns are given, including in business names, jokes, comic strips, and speeches. The document concludes by discussing optical illusions and their ability to create visual ambiguity.
This document discusses various ghost stories and urban legends from York, England. It summarizes accounts of several reported ghosts in historic buildings in York, including a young Victorian girl who fell to her death on a staircase. It also examines modern urban legends, like Bloody Mary and Slenderman, which originated online and gained widespread popularity through digital sharing and adaptation. The document reflects on the nature of new urban legends and their relationship to viral internet memes. In conclusion, it notes that "The Licked Hand" is a particularly creepy tale, while Slenderman could inspire an interesting creative project given the real-life killings said to be influenced by the fictional character.
The ghost of Canterville Chase has haunted the estate for 300 years but the current owners, the Otis family from America, are not afraid of ghosts. The ghost tries to scare the Otis family but the children are not frightened. Virginia, one of the daughters, feels bad for the ghost and wants to help him find peace so he can rest. She goes with the ghost to the haunted cavern, despite warnings. Eventually, through Virginia's kindness and belief in mercy, the ghost is released from his haunting of Canterville Chase.
The document summarizes several chapters from the story "The Canterville Ghost". It introduces the American Otis family who move into Canterville Castle in England, despite being warned that it is haunted. Strange events begin to occur, with a blood stain reappearing on the floor each morning. The family encounters the Canterville Ghost and attempt to clean the stain, angering the ghost. Subsequent interactions show the family is not afraid and plays tricks on the ghost, wounding his pride. Virginia later feels sorry for the lonely ghost who has not slept in 300 years.
1. The document discusses ambiguity, puns, and visual ambiguity through examples from literature, wordplay, and syntax.
2. It provides definitions of puns, examples of puns in marketing, literature, and names, and discusses ambiguity on multiple linguistic levels.
3. The document concludes by mentioning the International Save the Pun Foundation and several websites dedicated to puns.
it is based on the novel named canterville ghost.it is a thriller story based on a ghost . ghost is present in the villa
.jhfhryt hfrr hjh geryhgkj hdgyd hyryreiy kjfhgkdry gfreiurgjdfkghfkgr kyhferkt kfkrfrthk y rhrky kjgrhg jghajghhy fgrguerjgfkghfj ertkuhdfsgjfkgshgriu ekrtkgdj kertukdjgvhfdkg kdrtikgjfgjk kurtrejk jkj kriutjg,df erurl lriuglgjl rigi lfdjgui kerjigjd,gju eirjgkjgyud krjtug ldgkjdjgtreiot jelk jkgrug kj kjerkgk jk jkrgt kjrtjuk j krtrhk hrkthret khk hkrj gy ekjthkghrkgh je h h krk kutrh khjrkeu kjgrherkt uergth herkjghk uhyerkjh dekit kh kutkj hrkttk e yhrkurhjrghkerg ie k rk kgfd igtj orj o riojerj eioj oi etij ogrikgjjg retiogj greig gikgjgkijgkirhjuki rjogjr gogiju oig irgorugijrgierghrg groigrgju girog roiggjug irgjgijhgj giuhjdkjghkrg reiughjkghrg jerhjkrhgkg re hg kiguh dgiuhrgjdghkirgtkur
o rg g.
Urban legends, like rap and hip hop, exhibit features of literature such as being dramatic, playing on emotions, and using rhetorical devices. They appear credible because they are based in reality and explain mysterious phenomena. They also rely on common stereotypes and always involve something that supposedly happened to a friend of a friend. While many urban legends are not true, the rumors about Kentucky Fried Chicken containing people's fingers and an ingredient of Coca-Cola once being cocaine did have elements of truth.
The summary is:
1) The story takes place in Canterville Chase, an old English mansion that is supposedly haunted.
2) An American family moves in and does not believe the warnings about the ghost.
3) Virginia befriends the ghost and helps him find peace, leading him to reveal the story of his death and gift her valuable jewels before passing on.
The American Minister Hiram B. Otis and his family move into the haunted Canterville Chase estate in England despite warnings that it is haunted. On their first night, Mrs. Umney the housekeeper tells them about the blood stain on the library floor that will not be removed, left from the murder of Lady Eleanore de Canterville centuries ago. Washington Otis tries to clean the stain but it reappears after a thunderstorm, much to their surprise. The stain continues reappearing each morning, convincing the family that the house truly is haunted.
English project canterville ghost by abhishek copyabhishekandanmol
The document provides a summary of Oscar Wilde's short story "The Canterville Ghost". It describes the plot of the story in which an American family moves into an old English mansion, Canterville Chase, that is supposedly haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon de Canterville. The ghost attempts to frighten the Otis family with his spooky antics, but the family refuses to believe in ghosts and plays tricks on the ghost instead. The ghost eventually gives up trying to scare the family as the twins continue humiliating him with their pranks. The document outlines the characters and some key events in the story over multiple chapters.
The caterville ghost - Chapter 6 and 7Sõûråv Gùptã
1) Virginia is the only member of the Otis family who takes the ghost, Sir Simon, seriously. She listens to him and learns an important lesson.
2) Sir Simon asks Virginia to weep for him, pray for him, and accompany him to the angel of death. Virginia does this and disappears with Sir Simon.
3) Virginia later returns through a secret door carrying jewels. She reveals she helped pass Sir Simon on to the next world, and the family finds his skeleton.
Urban legends are stories that are circulated as true, often involving horrifying or humorous elements happening to friends or family members. Common examples described in the document include Bloody Mary, where a spirit may appear in a mirror when her name is called three times, and stories of alligators living in the New York City sewer system. Urban legends are often plausible enough to be believed but are generally not factual stories. They are typically passed along through oral or written forms from person to person.
The document provides a book review and summary of the short story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It introduces the author Oscar Wilde and provides background on the story. The summary then outlines the plot over 4 chapters, describing the American family that moves into a haunted English mansion, their interactions with the ghost, and their unconventional treatment of the ghost that leaves him feeling humiliated.
This document provides a summary of the short story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It describes how the American Minister Mr. Otis buys a haunted English estate, Canterville Chase, despite being warned by the previous owner about the ghost. Mr. Otis does not believe in ghosts. He and his family move into the estate and encounter strange occurrences, but the high-spirited daughter Virginia is not afraid of the ghost.
This story describes events surrounding an incident at a steel mill where an employee, Al Con, is fired after allegedly striking his foreman, Bueller. Witness Joe Wizowski and another employee, Jim, were present. The union plans to challenge Al's firing at a hearing. Wizowski and Jim inspect the pit where Al worked and find unsafe, toxic conditions, in violation of OSHA regulations, raising the possibility of filing an additional complaint. Jim considers testifying at the hearing on Al's behalf. The union mobilizes support to save Al's job, seeing his firing as an attack on all workers' rights.
The brief wondrous life of oscar waoalso by junot rock73
This document is the copyright page and introduction for the novel The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Díaz. It includes information about the author's previous works, copyright details, and excerpts from the novel introducing the concept of fukú, a curse that haunts the characters. The introduction describes fukú as originating in the Dominican Republic and spreading to impact other countries and events, with an enduring and inescapable effect on its victims.
The document is a summary of the story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It summarizes:
The Otis family moves into Canterville Chase, which is supposedly haunted. Their son Washington dismisses the ghost story and cleans a blood stain from the floor. However, the stain keeps reappearing. The ghost disturbs the family but they are not frightened. Virginia feels sorry for the ghost and helps him find a place to sleep by taking him to the churchyard, where he is finally at peace.
The document summarizes Oscar Wilde's short story "The Canterville Ghost". The story is about the Otis family who move into Canterville Chase, an English mansion that is haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon de Canterville. While the rest of the Otis family do not believe in ghosts, young Virginia feels sorry for Sir Simon and goes on a journey to help him find peace. She is able to help Sir Simon's spirit find rest by fulfilling an ancient prophecy. The document provides chapter summaries and questions to test the reader's comprehension of the story.
Oscar Wilde was born in 1854 in Dublin, Ireland. He studied at Trinity College in Dublin and Oxford University in England. He became famous in London as a writer, poet, and playwright in the late 1800s. His most famous work was the play The Importance of Being Earnest. However, he was imprisoned from 1895 to 1897 for homosexual acts, which were illegal at the time. After his release, he lived in France due to the social stigma. He died in 1900 at the young age of 46.
- The story is about an American family, the Otises, who move into Canterville Chase in England which is haunted by the Ghost of Sir Simon. The ghost tries to scare the family as he did previous occupants but fails due to the family's pragmatism and lack of belief in ghosts.
- The only family member who interacts with the ghost is the daughter Virginia, who feels sorry for him. She convinces the ghost to finally rest by taking him through the Garden of Death. Her encounter with the ghost is never fully revealed though it seems to be profound.
- The story contrasts the American way of life with English traditions and superstitions, and satirizes both through the interactions between
The Canterville Ghost, Class 11 English novel - Character sketch of characte...Kendriya Vidyalaya
This ppt aims to describe all the characters of class 11 novel 'The Canterville Ghost. There is both brief and detailed character sketch of all characters of class 11 long reading text(novel).
self made presentation...
Noel Gallagher, the surly Oasis guitarist, launched stinging insults at several fellow musicians during a drunken radio interview. He compared troubled singer Amy Winehouse to a "destitute horse" and criticized Mark Ronson and The Kaiser Chiefs. Gallagher also took issue with New York rapper Jay-Z headlining Glastonbury Festival. He is known for his scathing outbursts against other artists.
This document is a sales catalogue from AAA Entertainment that provides information on movies available for acquisition. It includes sections on new releases, movies in post-production, fiction titles, and movies in development. The catalogue lists movie titles, genres, languages, territories available, director information, and 1-2 sentence synopses for each movie. It also provides contact information for the head of acquisitions and head of sales.
This document contains 59 short poems or fragments on various themes including nature, life, death, memory, and the passage of time. The poems range from 3 to 6 lines and explore ideas through minimal yet vivid language and imagery. Overall, the collection provides a glimpse into the human experience and condition through concise and impactful poetic expressions.
it is based on the novel named canterville ghost.it is a thriller story based on a ghost . ghost is present in the villa
.jhfhryt hfrr hjh geryhgkj hdgyd hyryreiy kjfhgkdry gfreiurgjdfkghfkgr kyhferkt kfkrfrthk y rhrky kjgrhg jghajghhy fgrguerjgfkghfj ertkuhdfsgjfkgshgriu ekrtkgdj kertukdjgvhfdkg kdrtikgjfgjk kurtrejk jkj kriutjg,df erurl lriuglgjl rigi lfdjgui kerjigjd,gju eirjgkjgyud krjtug ldgkjdjgtreiot jelk jkgrug kj kjerkgk jk jkrgt kjrtjuk j krtrhk hrkthret khk hkrj gy ekjthkghrkgh je h h krk kutrh khjrkeu kjgrherkt uergth herkjghk uhyerkjh dekit kh kutkj hrkttk e yhrkurhjrghkerg ie k rk kgfd igtj orj o riojerj eioj oi etij ogrikgjjg retiogj greig gikgjgkijgkirhjuki rjogjr gogiju oig irgorugijrgierghrg groigrgju girog roiggjug irgjgijhgj giuhjdkjghkrg reiughjkghrg jerhjkrhgkg re hg kiguh dgiuhrgjdghkirgtkur
o rg g.
Urban legends, like rap and hip hop, exhibit features of literature such as being dramatic, playing on emotions, and using rhetorical devices. They appear credible because they are based in reality and explain mysterious phenomena. They also rely on common stereotypes and always involve something that supposedly happened to a friend of a friend. While many urban legends are not true, the rumors about Kentucky Fried Chicken containing people's fingers and an ingredient of Coca-Cola once being cocaine did have elements of truth.
The summary is:
1) The story takes place in Canterville Chase, an old English mansion that is supposedly haunted.
2) An American family moves in and does not believe the warnings about the ghost.
3) Virginia befriends the ghost and helps him find peace, leading him to reveal the story of his death and gift her valuable jewels before passing on.
The American Minister Hiram B. Otis and his family move into the haunted Canterville Chase estate in England despite warnings that it is haunted. On their first night, Mrs. Umney the housekeeper tells them about the blood stain on the library floor that will not be removed, left from the murder of Lady Eleanore de Canterville centuries ago. Washington Otis tries to clean the stain but it reappears after a thunderstorm, much to their surprise. The stain continues reappearing each morning, convincing the family that the house truly is haunted.
English project canterville ghost by abhishek copyabhishekandanmol
The document provides a summary of Oscar Wilde's short story "The Canterville Ghost". It describes the plot of the story in which an American family moves into an old English mansion, Canterville Chase, that is supposedly haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon de Canterville. The ghost attempts to frighten the Otis family with his spooky antics, but the family refuses to believe in ghosts and plays tricks on the ghost instead. The ghost eventually gives up trying to scare the family as the twins continue humiliating him with their pranks. The document outlines the characters and some key events in the story over multiple chapters.
The caterville ghost - Chapter 6 and 7Sõûråv Gùptã
1) Virginia is the only member of the Otis family who takes the ghost, Sir Simon, seriously. She listens to him and learns an important lesson.
2) Sir Simon asks Virginia to weep for him, pray for him, and accompany him to the angel of death. Virginia does this and disappears with Sir Simon.
3) Virginia later returns through a secret door carrying jewels. She reveals she helped pass Sir Simon on to the next world, and the family finds his skeleton.
Urban legends are stories that are circulated as true, often involving horrifying or humorous elements happening to friends or family members. Common examples described in the document include Bloody Mary, where a spirit may appear in a mirror when her name is called three times, and stories of alligators living in the New York City sewer system. Urban legends are often plausible enough to be believed but are generally not factual stories. They are typically passed along through oral or written forms from person to person.
The document provides a book review and summary of the short story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It introduces the author Oscar Wilde and provides background on the story. The summary then outlines the plot over 4 chapters, describing the American family that moves into a haunted English mansion, their interactions with the ghost, and their unconventional treatment of the ghost that leaves him feeling humiliated.
This document provides a summary of the short story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It describes how the American Minister Mr. Otis buys a haunted English estate, Canterville Chase, despite being warned by the previous owner about the ghost. Mr. Otis does not believe in ghosts. He and his family move into the estate and encounter strange occurrences, but the high-spirited daughter Virginia is not afraid of the ghost.
This story describes events surrounding an incident at a steel mill where an employee, Al Con, is fired after allegedly striking his foreman, Bueller. Witness Joe Wizowski and another employee, Jim, were present. The union plans to challenge Al's firing at a hearing. Wizowski and Jim inspect the pit where Al worked and find unsafe, toxic conditions, in violation of OSHA regulations, raising the possibility of filing an additional complaint. Jim considers testifying at the hearing on Al's behalf. The union mobilizes support to save Al's job, seeing his firing as an attack on all workers' rights.
The brief wondrous life of oscar waoalso by junot rock73
This document is the copyright page and introduction for the novel The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Díaz. It includes information about the author's previous works, copyright details, and excerpts from the novel introducing the concept of fukú, a curse that haunts the characters. The introduction describes fukú as originating in the Dominican Republic and spreading to impact other countries and events, with an enduring and inescapable effect on its victims.
The document is a summary of the story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It summarizes:
The Otis family moves into Canterville Chase, which is supposedly haunted. Their son Washington dismisses the ghost story and cleans a blood stain from the floor. However, the stain keeps reappearing. The ghost disturbs the family but they are not frightened. Virginia feels sorry for the ghost and helps him find a place to sleep by taking him to the churchyard, where he is finally at peace.
The document summarizes Oscar Wilde's short story "The Canterville Ghost". The story is about the Otis family who move into Canterville Chase, an English mansion that is haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon de Canterville. While the rest of the Otis family do not believe in ghosts, young Virginia feels sorry for Sir Simon and goes on a journey to help him find peace. She is able to help Sir Simon's spirit find rest by fulfilling an ancient prophecy. The document provides chapter summaries and questions to test the reader's comprehension of the story.
Oscar Wilde was born in 1854 in Dublin, Ireland. He studied at Trinity College in Dublin and Oxford University in England. He became famous in London as a writer, poet, and playwright in the late 1800s. His most famous work was the play The Importance of Being Earnest. However, he was imprisoned from 1895 to 1897 for homosexual acts, which were illegal at the time. After his release, he lived in France due to the social stigma. He died in 1900 at the young age of 46.
- The story is about an American family, the Otises, who move into Canterville Chase in England which is haunted by the Ghost of Sir Simon. The ghost tries to scare the family as he did previous occupants but fails due to the family's pragmatism and lack of belief in ghosts.
- The only family member who interacts with the ghost is the daughter Virginia, who feels sorry for him. She convinces the ghost to finally rest by taking him through the Garden of Death. Her encounter with the ghost is never fully revealed though it seems to be profound.
- The story contrasts the American way of life with English traditions and superstitions, and satirizes both through the interactions between
The Canterville Ghost, Class 11 English novel - Character sketch of characte...Kendriya Vidyalaya
This ppt aims to describe all the characters of class 11 novel 'The Canterville Ghost. There is both brief and detailed character sketch of all characters of class 11 long reading text(novel).
self made presentation...
Noel Gallagher, the surly Oasis guitarist, launched stinging insults at several fellow musicians during a drunken radio interview. He compared troubled singer Amy Winehouse to a "destitute horse" and criticized Mark Ronson and The Kaiser Chiefs. Gallagher also took issue with New York rapper Jay-Z headlining Glastonbury Festival. He is known for his scathing outbursts against other artists.
This document is a sales catalogue from AAA Entertainment that provides information on movies available for acquisition. It includes sections on new releases, movies in post-production, fiction titles, and movies in development. The catalogue lists movie titles, genres, languages, territories available, director information, and 1-2 sentence synopses for each movie. It also provides contact information for the head of acquisitions and head of sales.
This document contains 59 short poems or fragments on various themes including nature, life, death, memory, and the passage of time. The poems range from 3 to 6 lines and explore ideas through minimal yet vivid language and imagery. Overall, the collection provides a glimpse into the human experience and condition through concise and impactful poetic expressions.
This summary provides the essential information from the document in 3 sentences:
The document is a collection of 34 short poems or vignettes written in English that explore Indian themes, culture, mythology, and current events. The poems cover topics like religious rituals, family, gender roles, politics, nature, and history. Many of the poems are abstract and leave room for interpretation, while others comment on or are inspired by specific people or events happening in India.
This document contains a list of 102 poems written throughout the year of 2013, with each poem assigned a page number and date. The poems are organized by month, with multiple poems listed under each month from January through March.
This document contains 31 short poems or reflections by A.J. Rao. Many explore themes of nature, aging, memory, and impermanence. The poems are concise, often just a few lines or a short paragraph. Recurring images include trees, birds, the sea, and changing seasons. Overall the poems provide brief poetic meditations on life and observations of the natural world around the author.
This document contains 21 poems written by A.J.Rao between March 2-15. The poems explore themes of nature, memory, loss, and the passage of time. They make references to other poets and works and are tagged with keywords like "ekphrasis", "dying confession", and "Golconda". The poems range from 3 to 15 lines and utilize imagery and metaphors to reflect on everyday objects, people, and experiences.
This document appears to be a collection of poems or poetic passages by a single author. The poems explore various themes through vivid imagery and metaphor, including:
1. The vanishing of the human body and how bodies are remembered.
2. Contemplating mortality and what it means for the human body to return to dust.
3. Descriptions of nature, including gardens, trees, and animals.
4. Reflections on places the author has lived and memories of cities, mountains, and the sea.
5. Childhood recollections involving learning the alphabet and school.
This document contains 20 poems written in April 2014. The poems cover various topics such as souvenirs, mist, butterflies, trees, dreams, narration, earth day, gold, songs, turbans, children's inventories, uncles, old stories, physiology, torque, tinsel, inside thoughts, death, lampposts, hand holding, laundry, outlines, and unplugging. The poems range from 3 to 25 lines in length and explore philosophical and imaginative ideas through descriptive language and metaphor.
The document introduces an interview with cartoonist and game designer John Kovalic conducted at Warpcon 26. It discusses Kovalic's work creating games like Munchkin, Kobalds Ate My Baby and his ability to pursue his nerdy passions. The introduction also provides a brief overview of the sections in the student magazine, including interviews, reviews of films, music, arts, gaming, humor and poetry.
Fifteen painted cards from a vampire tarotNaman Kumar
The document contains excerpts from 15 cards of a vampire tarot deck. Each card provides a brief story or description. The Fool card introduces a young man who seeks immortality by meeting a vampire in a graveyard. The voice that speaks to him says "This is not life." Other cards include The Magician, which references a man claiming to be 1000 years old, The Priestess featuring a self-proclaimed vampire queen on a talk show, and The Lovers describing a couple found dead together in a coffin with the man more decayed than the woman. The final card, The World, has a vampire telling the listener that vampires are essentially just like humans but colder and deader.
The student composition discusses the statement that nobody should enjoy going to zoos which keep animals in cages. While the student enjoyed zoos as a child, they recognize that keeping animals in cages denies them freedom and can cause psychological harm. Supporters of zoos argue that the animals are well cared for, but the student believes proper wildlife parks that allow both security and freedom for animals are better. In conclusion, the student thinks zoos are often cruel, but acknowledges many families will continue visiting zoos with their children.
presentation on catch up Friday drop everything and readRachelleAbalos
Brille, an older prisoner with poor eyesight, is part of a group of political prisoners known as Span One. A new harsh warder, Hannetjie, begins targeting the group. Brille unintentionally drops a cabbage in front of Hannetjie, angering him. Later, Brille catches Hannetjie stealing fertilizer and blackmails him into leaving Span One alone. Through this, Brille is able to gain power over the abusive warder and improve conditions for the political prisoners.
The document is a summary of the beginning of Robert Louis Stevenson's novella "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde". It describes Mr. Utterson, a lawyer, and his friend Mr. Enfield taking their weekly walk, during which Mr. Enfield tells Mr. Utterson a strange story about a man who trampled a young girl and then paid to keep the incident quiet, obtaining the money from a cellar accessed through a mysterious door. The document provides context and setup for the novella's plot.
The document is a summary of Chapter 1 of the short story "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde. It introduces Mr. Otis, an American who buys Canterville Castle in England despite warnings that it is haunted. Mr. Otis and his family arrive at the castle and encounter signs of the ghost, including a blood stain that cannot be removed from the library floor.
The document is a summary of Chapter 1 of The Canterville Ghost by Oscar Wilde. It summarizes that:
1) Mr. Otis, an American, buys Canterville Castle in England despite locals warning him it is haunted. However, Mr. Otis does not believe in ghosts.
2) When the Otis family arrives at the castle, they see a mysterious blood stain in the library. The housekeeper explains it is from Lady Eleanore who was murdered by her husband centuries ago.
3) Washington Otis tries to clean the stain but it reappears after lightning and thunder, indicating the ghost's displeasure at its removal.
Check My Essay For Fragments. Online assignment writing service.Christy Velasquez
The document provides instructions for checking an essay for fragments. It outlines a 5-step process: 1) Create an account; 2) Complete a order form with instructions and deadline; 3) Review bids from writers and choose one; 4) Review the completed paper and authorize payment; 5) Request revisions to ensure satisfaction. It emphasizes providing original, high-quality content and offering refunds for plagiarized work.
Persuasive Essay Short Essay On Nat. Online assignment writing service.Ashley Smith
This document provides a budget proposal and financial forecasts for a landscaping business called Cutting Edge Landscaping for the years 2011 through 2014. It includes an executive summary, sales forecasts and assumptions, capital expenditure budgets, investment analyses including cash flows, NPV, rates of return, and payback periods. It also includes pro forma income statements and balance sheets for each year. The sales forecast anticipates obtaining 100 homeowner clients each year who are retirees.
Vern tells his friends Gordie, Chris, and Teddy that he overheard his brother Billy and Billy's friend Charlie discussing finding a dead body in the forest near an abandoned railway line. They believe it is the body of Ray Brower, a boy who had gone missing while berry picking a few days prior. Vern's friends make plans to sneak out at night and go see the dead body, not realizing this discovery will change their lives forever.
Eng the canterville ghost summary by kaustub shenoykaustub SHENOY
The summary is:
1) The Otis family moves into Canterville Chase despite warnings that it is haunted.
2) The ghost tries to scare the family but they are not frightened, cleaning bloodstains and ignoring his antics.
3) Virginia befriends the sad ghost and helps him find peace, leading him to the churchyard where he is finally at rest.
Get ready for a delightful blend of travelogue, storytelling, and humour - from the ridiculous to the sublime.
Travel with us to Knossos Palace, Crete, and beyond as we share our tales and experiences through a refreshingly different lens.
A melange of storytelling, travel and humour.
Enjoy the musings of a would-be- professor of ethics.
Follow our loved-up couple on their absurd and very tragic story set in Crete.
Get to know Alex - a college kid trying to survive among the undead in NYC.
Dive into a travelogue about Knossos Palace in Crete.
The Canterville Ghost is a short story by Oscar Wilde about the Otis family who move into Canterville Chase, a house haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon de Canterville. Despite warnings that the house is haunted, Mr. Otis does not believe in ghosts. Strange events begin to occur, including the reappearance of a blood stain on the library floor that cannot be removed. The ghost tries to frighten the Otis family but they are not scared and treat the ghost in unusual, disrespectful ways. The twins in particular play tricks on the ghost, frustrating his attempts to haunt the house.
- The American Otis family moves into Canterville Chase in England, which is rumored to be haunted by the ghost of Sir Simon de Canterville.
- Virginia Otis encounters the sad and lonely ghost, who complains that he is forced to haunt the castle and is unable to sleep. He asks Virginia to help him find a place to rest.
- Virginia promises to help the ghost and leads him through a secret passage. When she doesn't return for dinner, the family searches for her without success. At midnight, Virginia reappears with a box of jewels, saying the ghost is dead.
- The family follows Virginia to a secret room where they find the skeleton of Sir Simon, the
The document is a collection of poems written by A.J. Rao in June 2003. It includes 30 poems on various topics ranging from nature, philosophy and daily observations. The poems are brief, typically 3 sentences or less, and explore ideas and images through minimal yet vivid language.
The document contains 18 short poems or reflections on various topics such as arguments, editing, illness, fear of flying, death, sunsets, women, understanding, spontaneity, and the supermoon. The poems explore philosophical ideas through imagery and metaphor in brief, abstract language.
The poem describes passing over a bridge spanning a river of sand at dawn on a noisy train. As the train curves away from the bridge, the narrator takes a long backward glance at the bridge, now suffering from noise injury caused by the passing train. The bridge stands alone in the emptiness, spanning the river of sand.
This poem collection spans poetry written between January and March 2001. It contains over 50 poems on various topics ranging from nature, relationships, philosophy and daily life. The poems are concise, often only a few lines, and explore ideas and images through metaphor and symbolism.
The document is a collection of poems written by A.J. Rao between July 25, 2011 and October 5, 2011. It contains over 40 poems on various topics ranging from nature, daily life, relationships and reflections. The poems are presented with their titles and text. An introduction provides background that the poems were generated from an automated blog to book conversion system using content from the author's blog.
This poem collection contains over 70 poems written by A.J. Rao between October 2001 and December 2011. The poems cover a wide range of topics and themes including nature, history, relationships, and daily life. They are arranged chronologically based on the date they were written. A table of contents is provided at the beginning for easy navigation of the poems.
The document is a collection of nature poetry and short prose pieces by the author nisheedhi. It contains over 50 brief passages describing observations of the natural world, memories from childhood, and reflections on themes like seasons, landscapes, plants and animals. The pieces range from 3 to 13 sentences and provide vivid sensory details and imagery related to the outdoors.
The document contains a collection of short poems. It begins with an introductory section listing the title "Poetry of the Moment: Volume 2 - Short Poetry" and the author "nisheedhi". The collection then contains over 30 untitled poems ranging from 3 to 13 lines in length. The poems cover a wide variety of topics including nature, death, travel, social issues, and philosophical reflections.
The boy priest of Lepakshi temple gave a tour of the temple's history and artworks in a haunting voice that bridged distances in time. His childlike voice floated like a cloud as he described statuesque stone figures, including a woman with delicate features. On another occasion, the narrator reflects on returning from the Jagannath temple in Puri, recalling images of wooden gods and celebrations of celestial love, as well as the omnipotent god who sees humans in their absurdity and fears unblinking.
1. The document describes a man reflecting on the vulnerable women who lived near the railway tracks and his interactions with them, including accompanying friends to a brothel out of curiosity.
2. It then discusses his cousin who endured domestic violence and depression, believing the world was conspiring against her.
3. Years later, the man wrote poems to capture the pointlessness of adultery and the ramblings of a schizophrenic mind, alluding to his cousin's mental state after her marriage and second bout of depression.
The document is about a man who is fascinated by death and the mysteries of life. He spends time in cremation grounds with his friend, contemplating death. Years later, after witnessing the death of a friend, he develops a theory that people continue to exist in time even after ceasing to exist in space. He is intrigued by spiritual figures and loves exploring philosophical questions, though this drives one acquaintance insane. He also admires a classmate from a distance but struggles with feelings of inadequacy.
The document describes a boy's experiences growing up in a small town in India. He is deeply afraid of the dark and strange noises and sights he encounters at night. He also observes and interacts with the people in his community, including a missionary doctor who helps the poor, and his unstable landlord who frightens him. The boy spends his time exploring the area, going to school, and dealing with illness and death in his community.
This document provides a series of vignettes describing life in the town of Sompeta. It describes the monsoon rains and procession for the God Jagannath. It introduces characters like Srinivasarao who cared for the narrator in school. Srinivasarao later marries a woman who tragically dies young after giving birth. The document also describes the Telugu teacher Sharanyacharya and his two daughters, Tiruvengadamma and her sister. It concludes with descriptions of fires during road construction and the summer heat, as well as the seasonal flooding of the Nagavali River during monsoons.
The document discusses the author's reflections on death and impermanence. As a child, he saw his aunt Savitri die unexpectedly by falling into a well. His other aunt Vinodini lived with a cancer that eventually took her life. Throughout his life, he has experienced periods of existential dread and fear of his own mortality, seeing himself as just one small consciousness in a vast, uncertain world. He recalls vivid nightmares of dying and has come to appreciate death as a natural part of life.
This document provides glimpses into the narrator's childhood experiences and observations growing up in a village in Sompeta. It describes several people from the narrator's life including teachers, relatives, and villagers. It also shares the narrator's childhood fears and fascinations including ghosts, the edge of the earth, dangerous animals in the jungle, and encounters with snakes. The writing explores the narrator's vivid imagination and curiosity about the world from a young perspective.
This document contains 20 short poems or vignettes with themes of nature, death, memory, mythology, and observation. The poems explore images like flamingos, trees, rain, bells, dreams, myths, and shadows through minimal yet vivid language. Overall the collection captures brief moments and reflections through a poetic lens.
The document contains poems describing various scenes and experiences. Many poems depict natural landscapes and focus on elements like fireflies, crows, tribal people, mountains, beaches, lakes, and forests. Other poems describe cultural sites like temples, palaces, and Buddhist stupas. Interactions and relationships between people are also explored, such as descriptions of women, children, elderly people, and lovers. Moods and emotions like hope, darkness, refusal, and transience are reflected upon.
1) The narrator experiences existential confusion and uncertainty about his own existence from a young age, feeling like he may be part of someone else's dream.
2) As he gets older, he grapples with philosophical and theological questions about causality, duality, and the nature of reality.
3) Throughout his life he experiences periods of illness, hallucination, fear, and introspection, but also finds moments of beauty in nature that provide temporary relief from his inner turmoil.
This poem describes scenes of nature, including fireflies rising at night, monks coming from nowhere, and words humming like leaves in the wind. It also depicts cultural elements such as women dancing dimsa and men drinking wine all night. The poem references the passage of time and change through lines like "They all went beyond / The mountains never to return" and explores themes of impermanence and memories that remain through dreams.
Mersault observes various images or glimpses of people in the train who exist merely as images to him on the periphery of his awareness, like Marthe and her lover from Camus' novel he is reading. These include a woman changing a baby's diaper where the child swings gently in its cradle like a bird in a nest, as well as Marthe who exists as a mere image to Mersault though she herself does not realize it. Only the narrator seems aware these people are merely images passing in the train.
বাংলাদেশের অর্থনৈতিক সমীক্ষা ২০২৪ [Bangladesh Economic Review 2024 Bangla.pdf] কম্পিউটার , ট্যাব ও স্মার্ট ফোন ভার্সন সহ সম্পূর্ণ বাংলা ই-বুক বা pdf বই " সুচিপত্র ...বুকমার্ক মেনু 🔖 ও হাইপার লিংক মেনু 📝👆 যুক্ত ..
আমাদের সবার জন্য খুব খুব গুরুত্বপূর্ণ একটি বই ..বিসিএস, ব্যাংক, ইউনিভার্সিটি ভর্তি ও যে কোন প্রতিযোগিতা মূলক পরীক্ষার জন্য এর খুব ইম্পরট্যান্ট একটি বিষয় ...তাছাড়া বাংলাদেশের সাম্প্রতিক যে কোন ডাটা বা তথ্য এই বইতে পাবেন ...
তাই একজন নাগরিক হিসাবে এই তথ্য গুলো আপনার জানা প্রয়োজন ...।
বিসিএস ও ব্যাংক এর লিখিত পরীক্ষা ...+এছাড়া মাধ্যমিক ও উচ্চমাধ্যমিকের স্টুডেন্টদের জন্য অনেক কাজে আসবে ...
Chapter wise All Notes of First year Basic Civil Engineering.pptxDenish Jangid
Chapter wise All Notes of First year Basic Civil Engineering
Syllabus
Chapter-1
Introduction to objective, scope and outcome the subject
Chapter 2
Introduction: Scope and Specialization of Civil Engineering, Role of civil Engineer in Society, Impact of infrastructural development on economy of country.
Chapter 3
Surveying: Object Principles & Types of Surveying; Site Plans, Plans & Maps; Scales & Unit of different Measurements.
Linear Measurements: Instruments used. Linear Measurement by Tape, Ranging out Survey Lines and overcoming Obstructions; Measurements on sloping ground; Tape corrections, conventional symbols. Angular Measurements: Instruments used; Introduction to Compass Surveying, Bearings and Longitude & Latitude of a Line, Introduction to total station.
Levelling: Instrument used Object of levelling, Methods of levelling in brief, and Contour maps.
Chapter 4
Buildings: Selection of site for Buildings, Layout of Building Plan, Types of buildings, Plinth area, carpet area, floor space index, Introduction to building byelaws, concept of sun light & ventilation. Components of Buildings & their functions, Basic concept of R.C.C., Introduction to types of foundation
Chapter 5
Transportation: Introduction to Transportation Engineering; Traffic and Road Safety: Types and Characteristics of Various Modes of Transportation; Various Road Traffic Signs, Causes of Accidents and Road Safety Measures.
Chapter 6
Environmental Engineering: Environmental Pollution, Environmental Acts and Regulations, Functional Concepts of Ecology, Basics of Species, Biodiversity, Ecosystem, Hydrological Cycle; Chemical Cycles: Carbon, Nitrogen & Phosphorus; Energy Flow in Ecosystems.
Water Pollution: Water Quality standards, Introduction to Treatment & Disposal of Waste Water. Reuse and Saving of Water, Rain Water Harvesting. Solid Waste Management: Classification of Solid Waste, Collection, Transportation and Disposal of Solid. Recycling of Solid Waste: Energy Recovery, Sanitary Landfill, On-Site Sanitation. Air & Noise Pollution: Primary and Secondary air pollutants, Harmful effects of Air Pollution, Control of Air Pollution. . Noise Pollution Harmful Effects of noise pollution, control of noise pollution, Global warming & Climate Change, Ozone depletion, Greenhouse effect
Text Books:
1. Palancharmy, Basic Civil Engineering, McGraw Hill publishers.
2. Satheesh Gopi, Basic Civil Engineering, Pearson Publishers.
3. Ketki Rangwala Dalal, Essentials of Civil Engineering, Charotar Publishing House.
4. BCP, Surveying volume 1
Leveraging Generative AI to Drive Nonprofit InnovationTechSoup
In this webinar, participants learned how to utilize Generative AI to streamline operations and elevate member engagement. Amazon Web Service experts provided a customer specific use cases and dived into low/no-code tools that are quick and easy to deploy through Amazon Web Service (AWS.)
Strategies for Effective Upskilling is a presentation by Chinwendu Peace in a Your Skill Boost Masterclass organisation by the Excellence Foundation for South Sudan on 08th and 09th June 2024 from 1 PM to 3 PM on each day.
How to Fix the Import Error in the Odoo 17Celine George
An import error occurs when a program fails to import a module or library, disrupting its execution. In languages like Python, this issue arises when the specified module cannot be found or accessed, hindering the program's functionality. Resolving import errors is crucial for maintaining smooth software operation and uninterrupted development processes.
it describes the bony anatomy including the femoral head , acetabulum, labrum . also discusses the capsule , ligaments . muscle that act on the hip joint and the range of motion are outlined. factors affecting hip joint stability and weight transmission through the joint are summarized.
Main Java[All of the Base Concepts}.docxadhitya5119
This is part 1 of my Java Learning Journey. This Contains Custom methods, classes, constructors, packages, multithreading , try- catch block, finally block and more.
How to Setup Warehouse & Location in Odoo 17 InventoryCeline George
In this slide, we'll explore how to set up warehouses and locations in Odoo 17 Inventory. This will help us manage our stock effectively, track inventory levels, and streamline warehouse operations.
ISO/IEC 27001, ISO/IEC 42001, and GDPR: Best Practices for Implementation and...PECB
Denis is a dynamic and results-driven Chief Information Officer (CIO) with a distinguished career spanning information systems analysis and technical project management. With a proven track record of spearheading the design and delivery of cutting-edge Information Management solutions, he has consistently elevated business operations, streamlined reporting functions, and maximized process efficiency.
Certified as an ISO/IEC 27001: Information Security Management Systems (ISMS) Lead Implementer, Data Protection Officer, and Cyber Risks Analyst, Denis brings a heightened focus on data security, privacy, and cyber resilience to every endeavor.
His expertise extends across a diverse spectrum of reporting, database, and web development applications, underpinned by an exceptional grasp of data storage and virtualization technologies. His proficiency in application testing, database administration, and data cleansing ensures seamless execution of complex projects.
What sets Denis apart is his comprehensive understanding of Business and Systems Analysis technologies, honed through involvement in all phases of the Software Development Lifecycle (SDLC). From meticulous requirements gathering to precise analysis, innovative design, rigorous development, thorough testing, and successful implementation, he has consistently delivered exceptional results.
Throughout his career, he has taken on multifaceted roles, from leading technical project management teams to owning solutions that drive operational excellence. His conscientious and proactive approach is unwavering, whether he is working independently or collaboratively within a team. His ability to connect with colleagues on a personal level underscores his commitment to fostering a harmonious and productive workplace environment.
Date: May 29, 2024
Tags: Information Security, ISO/IEC 27001, ISO/IEC 42001, Artificial Intelligence, GDPR
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How to Make a Field Mandatory in Odoo 17Celine George
In Odoo, making a field required can be done through both Python code and XML views. When you set the required attribute to True in Python code, it makes the field required across all views where it's used. Conversely, when you set the required attribute in XML views, it makes the field required only in the context of that particular view.
1. Potty poetry
Our citizens are hoity- toity
And at times downright naughty
Yet our city has to teach them
A thing or two in daily potty.
2. The kicks from behind are a side-issue
The donkeys may not wear
Nappies or tissues happily
How you will persuade them
To wear them is the central issue.
Painful kicks from their behinds
Are ,after all, a side-issue.
“Donkey owners in a Kenyan town are up in arms after officials ordered their animals to
wear nappies.”
3. One need not have a large brain to be a civil servant
He is a French civil servant
With a pin-sized brain
Thank God one need not be
Well -endowed in that line.
“A man with an unusually tiny brain managed to live an entirely normal life as a civil
servant.Scans of the 44-year-old man’s brain showed a huge fluid-filled chamber took up
most of his skull.French researchers say it left room for little more than a thin sheet of actual
brain tissue.”
4. They can profitably stare at the ceiling
The ministers have no work to do
Here ,there,and anywhere
They make friends with the lizard
And stare and stare and stare
The ceiling is a good place to stare ,
Away from the public glare,
They also serve the nation
Who sit in their chairs and stare.
(”At least 30 assistant Kenyan ministers have written a letter to the president, complaining
they have no work to do.”)
5. The bum truth
For a year he has not spoken a single lie
But when it comes to the wife’s bum
He could neither speak the “big” lie
Nor keep mum: one does not know why.
A Swansea man is about to complete a year without telling a lie - but admits he came unstuck
when his wife asked: “Does my bum look big in this?”
6. A bad case of “guestritis”
This honored guest has talked
For 30 hours without break
Her friend is sick with chronic
“Guestritis”, what the heck.
7. We settle for the meat
For the sexy babes the brain
Surely takes the back seat
The brainy ones are not much
In the bed , rain or heat
Finally we sacrifice gray matter
And settle for the meat.
8. The bride in whiskers
This German farmer had picked up
His pretty bride on the net
On his first night she was actually
A whiskered man in her pants.
9. He felt forlorn and love-lorn, watching porn
He felt sad and forlorn,
Watching alone all the porn
He actually liked all of you
To feel equally love-lorn
And screened the stuff for all
Ye,high-born and low-born !
“A TECHNICIAN at a French Polynesian television station has been suspended from work
after accidentally screening a porn movie he thought he was watching alone”
10. Mountain dew prevents pregnancy
All through the night we make love
Under the stars, me and you
Our torrid love affair goes on ,
Protected by the mountain dew
In the company of the mountain goat
And the friendly sheep and the ewe.
“ORLANDO, Fla. — A recent survey that found some Florida teens believe drinking a cap of
bleach will prevent HIV and a shot of Mountain Dew will stop pregnancy has prompted
lawmakers to push for an overhaul of sex education in the state.”
11. Poo analysis is a scholarly pursuit that stimulates the intellectual in you
It is true that poo is serious stuff
Not merely belonging to the loo
Poo smells a lot but tells a lot too,
Highly useful like the didgeridoo.
View it like a regular for a detailed
And scatological analysis in your loo
These scholarly pursuits will surely
Stimulate the intellectual in you.
12. You get banned from tennis if you grunt loudly in play
You get banned from tennis
If you grunt loudly in play
For such noises distract
The other players all day
Less distracting sounds like
Passing the wind seem okay.
13. It is the plumbing problems that plague their performance
The Kiwis' concerns are neither
Less libido nor lack of chance
It is the plumbing problems
That plague their performance.
“Lack of sexual desire and infrequent intercourse are among the most common sexual
problems experienced by New Zealanders, according to a new academic study.”
14. It is a foul and dastardly act to leak before the Police Department
The cops are polite guys
With a friendly public face
It is a dastardly act and
Is surely a cognizable case
If a guy chooses to leak
Right in front of their place.
“An apparently drunk man picked the wrong place to tinkle. Appleton, Wis. police arrested
the man Friday afternoon after he reportedly relieved himself in front of the police
department.”
15. In our country we vacuum our underpants off and on
A vacuum cleaner is without doubt
The most gorgeous thing in town
Its going is smooth ,under and down
In our country we vacuum off and on
All our underpants ,above and down-
A normal practice ,you would have known.
.
A Polish worker had been caught in the act with a vacuum cleaner and when asked what he
was doing with the machine ,he claimed that he was vacuuming his underpants, which was a
normal practice in Poland.
16. Vinny the mobster is verily the pulchritudinous friendster
Vinny mobster is very gorgeous,
But inside the prison Vinny who ?
These days Vinny the poo practices
His sharp-shooting in prison loo
Vinny is now a great scholar ,
Both pulchritudinous and platitudinous
He tells his son do’s and don’t s and
Has hobbies truly multitudinous.
NEW YORK (AP) - He’s known as Vinny Gorgeous, but convicted mob boss Vincent Basciano
might want to trade up to Vinny Photogenic or Vinny Pulchritudinous.
17. All the world is a stage ,all the men and women players
Without booze and fag
We cannot think of a bar
If we cannot have our bar
Without nicotine and tar
We shall deem our bar
Just Shakespearean theater.
All the world is a stage and
Men players says the bard.
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more.
It is a tale told by an idiot
Full of smoke and fury
Our lungs are black
Like Macbeth’s dark deeds
And all our yesterdays
Have lighted fools
The way to dusty death.
“Bars in Minnesota are declaring themselves theatres to get around a public smoking ban.
The state ban allows actors to light up in character during theatrical productions.
So the bars are declaring themselves theatres and their customers performers, reports the Daily
Telegraph.“
18. The humbled lion now stands on the herald without its manhood
Women will have none of this
Male stuff on the herald
So there is now no penis
In the lion’s loins, O my God
The humbled lion now stands
Without penis on the herald.
“Protests from female soldiers have led to the Swedish military removing the penis of a heraldic lion
depicted on the Nordic Battlegroup’s coat of arms.
The armed forces agreed to emasculate the lion after a group of women from the rapid reaction force
lodged a complaint to the European Court of Justice, Göteborgs-Posten reports.”
19. A she-goat is not acceptable looking to the gravity of the offense
The first lady Kibaki has whacked him allegedly
Nothing less than a he-goat and an apology
Is what the victim demands from the first family
A she-goat is not acceptable looking to the gravity.
“Amidst the political unrest that has ravaged Kenya, elders are demanding a goat from the President
as compensation for an alleged assault by his wife.”
20. Art for ants’ sake
For art’s sake we stand naked
Against the tree in cling-film
Big black ants are playing
Havoc with our sensitivities.
(Naked students in Colombia attach themselves to trees in cling-film in the name of art.)
21. This daddy is hot
While the whole family was sick
And little Tom ached all over
The daddy got hot last night
Sonny’s vowels have come off loose.
(Excuse letter from home
Maryann was absent December 11 - 16 because she had a fever, sore throat, headache, and upset
stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever, and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all
over. I wasn’t the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father
even got hot last night. )
22. We decorate your interior
We do all kinds of dick painting
And other interior decoration
Guaranteed to enhance yours and
Partner’s aesthetic satisfaction.
(An advertisement for home improvement:
“C G Dick Painting has provided high quality wall covering and painting expertise for the last 26
years to Columbia County, New York residences. Owners Craig and Victoria Dick are members of the
National Guild of Professional Paperhangers, offering our customers with the best in training,
installations, and product selections for your interior wall needs.)
23. With an ignoranus the sarchasm will widen
Dealing with an ignoranus will
Only increase sarchasm quickly
And you withdraw willy-nilly
Making you look really silly.
(The Washington Post’s Style Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it
by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Some hilarious ones are as
follows :
Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.
Ignoranus (n): A person who’s both stupid and an arse.
Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent….”
http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/3830
24. The world is their loo
Men are happier than women
Because the world is their loo
And when they belch they can beat
Beethoven black and blue.
(Why Men Are Happier Than Women
1. We keep our last name.
2. The garage is all ours.
4. We can be president.
5. The world is our urinal.
6. Same work, more pay.
7. Wrinkles add character.
8. People never stare at our chest when we’re talking to them.
9. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.”)
http://www.davesdaily.com/funpages.htm
25. The Spanish cows appreciate classical music and have a dim view of rock and
jazz
The Spanish cows have eclectic tastes
When they go about their lactation
But as cognoscenti they choose Mozart
Over rock and jazz without hesitation.
“The Chirigota farm on the outskirts of Madrid is using an innovative system to produce the best
quality milk possible from its milking cows.
The bovines are treated like VIP’s at this Spanish farm with the help of accessories such as waterbeds,
electronic brushes and sprinklers that have turned the complex into a five-star hotel for pampered cows.
However, the biggest influence on milk quality, according to the farm owners, is the use of music. It is
not any old music though, but that of the composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. The placid harmonies
of the Austrian composer’s concerto for flute and harp in D major is played continually at milking
time. The music soothes the nerves of the Friesians.
26. Our company sucks but our rival sucks more
Our company sucks,in the core,
Our programs are such a bore
But there is good news at the door
Our rival company sucks more.
(”NEW YORK –
Sirius Satellite Radio Inc. (SIRI) CEO Mel Karmazin sought to allay shareholder concerns at the
company’s annual meeting Thursday, saying he was just as disappointed as other investors in Sirius’
lagging stock price. Compared to rival XM (XMSR), however, he said: “We suck less.”
27. Personal freshness is a matter of confidence
His pants have been worn for 2 years ,
Pretty pants we heartily agree
Are you confident about your personal freshness ,
We ask hesitatingly.
(”Darwin man wears same trousers for 2.5 years The fashion police have been called in on a Darwin
accountant who admits he has worn the same pair of trousers every work day for more than two years.
“Wayne” will not reveal his surname but is proud of wearing the same pants Monday to Friday, only
washing them on the weekend.The father of one says he sometimes gets another wear out of them on
Saturday”I wear them all week, don’t wash,” he said.
“I do wash them at the end of the week and I sometimes wear them out on a Saturday night when I go
to live theatre or wherever it may be.
“But nearly two-and-a-half years I’ve been wearing the same set of trousers.”
Business etiquette specialist Patsy Rowe has told the ABC’s Barry Nichols that Wayne’s case is deeply
troubling.
“I’m just a little concerned,” she said.
“This is a personal matter Barry, and I wouldn’t discuss it normally, about odour. One doesn’t like to
bring this up but is Wayne confident about his personal freshness?”
http://strange.blosker.com/link/darwin-man-wears-same-trousers-for-2.5-years-11983
28. Porno reading is permitted for rape convicts
In prison you cannot read porno
And the law is very strict,
Unless you have at least one
Rape conviction to your credit.
“STOCKHOLM, Sweden –Convicted sex offenders in Sweden are free to read pornography in their
cells following a court ruling that has angered the prison service.
The Supreme Administrative Court in Stockholm last week ruled that the Swedish Prison and
Probation Service had no right to deny a rape convict access to his porn magazines.”
29. The cops are without pants
The Baltimore police are in a crisis
With their stakes very high
Without a pair of pants how can they
Look the thieves in the eye ?
“BALTIMORE –Baltimore police are looking for a few good pairs of pants.
The police department has run out of two popular sizes of the custom-made navy blue uniform pants it
provides to every officer, a department spokesman said Wednesday.”
http://www.boston.com/news/odd
30. Buy two kilos of cabbage and you get a pack of condoms free
If you buy two kilos of cabbages
You get a nice pack of condoms free
We are now stocking up on cabbages
For the ensuing monsoon with glee.
(NEW DELHI (Reuters) - India, struggling to promote greater condom use among its population, is
looking to hire its own “condom man” to follow the example of a former Thai cabinet minister who
successfully pushed for safer sex, the Times of India reported.
National AIDS Control Organization (NACO) chief Sujatha Rao said that India needed to find
someone like Mechai Viravaidya, famous for getting Thais to talk about sex, condoms and
AIDS.Viravaidya became famous in Thailand as the “Condom King” for actions such as taking
condoms to World Bank talks as well as for the name of his Bangkok restaurant “Cabbages and
Condoms,” where condoms are a major part of the decor.)
31. Women shake their fingers at their manhood
Giggling women shake their fingers
At speeding drivers
The aspersions they cast on their manhood
Causes shivers.
“A new Australian ad campaign is seeking to reduce road deaths by questioning the manhood of
speeding drivers.
The series of TV ads shows women shaking their little finger - a gesture used to symbolise a small penis
- as speeding male motorists race past.”
32. Plunging necklines are not spiritually uplifting
They attend the mass every Sunday
Deep in their souls they ardently pray
Alas, plunging necklines have their sway
Over bodies making them an easy prey.
(“The Catholic Church has issued guidelines on what Filipinos should wear to mass in Manila after
some parishioners complained about distracting skimpy attire.
“This is to remind people that it would be good to come in appropriate clothing because other people are
scandalized,” said Peachy Yamsuan of the archdiocese of Manila on Monday.
“It is for the other worshippers who are distracted. You come to the church to pray and if your eyes
wander and you see inappropriate clothes, well, it does not add to your spiritual goals.”)
33. The women are self-sufficient and men should focus on their core competencies
The American women should be admired
For their self-sufficiency
They would prefer their men to leave them
To their own proficiency
And focus on doing dishes and vacuum cleaning
As their core competency.
“There was a new study out that said a majority of women do not have an orgasm from intercourse but
rather from foreplay, specially oral sex. A little over half of the women questioned said they only have
an orgasm during intercourse about 35 percent of the time as opposed to having an orgasm about 70
percent of the time when their partner does oral sex to them.
Even more interesting, women also said that they not only achieve an orgasm more often than not
when they are masturbating with a toy but the orgasm is usually more intense and they generally have
multiple orgasms when they are alone.”
34. We are sure the police are adequately trained in changing diapers
They will jail a thumb-sucking toddler
For firing on the police
We admire them for their sagacity
Without malice
We hope they can change diapers
Every five minutes thrice.
(“Srinagar: Police in Kashmir usually accustomed to fighting separatist militants have a new target in
their sights — teenagers canoodling in parks, restaurants and at Internet cafes.The crackdown aims to
curb “immoral activities,” a senior police officer said on Friday, adding that dozens of places had been
raided across Srinagar.”)
35. Their moral conscience is outraged
The cops here are decent guys with liberal views
But they cant bear the youth with morals loose
When it comes to really touching in public places
Even if transactions are avoided in private places.
(”Srinagar: Police in Kashmir usually accustomed to fighting separatist militants have a new target in
their sights — teenagers canoodling in parks, restaurants and at Internet cafes.
The crackdown aims to curb “immoral activities,” a senior police officer said on Friday, adding that
dozens of places had been raided across Srinagar.”)
36. We now call her Joan of Arc
In our party we love intensely our madam
And worship her as Durga at kadam kadam
We are sorry she does not like it ek dum
We now call her Joan of Arc ,that is a lark.
She will now bless us profusely,please mark.
NEW DELHI: It could have been a sycophantic partyman pulling off the old trick to curry favour with
the leadership. But the man responsible for the projection of Sonia Gandhi as goddess Durga in a poster
in Moradabad had no idea that the Congress president would hardly react with divine beneficience.
With TV cameras repeatedly zooming on the poster at the Moradabad district Congress office, Sonia
called for immediate action. Moradabad district party unit chief Ajay S Soni was suspended.
(Kadam kadam means at every step. Ek dum means absolutely or suddenly)
37. Naughty ladies make innocent gentlemen blush
Innocent gentlemen politely admire female faces
Turning their gaze away from the interesting areas
Naughty ladies focus on men’s other areas directly
Making them blush severely in their under-pants.
(ATLANTA - Contrary to popular opinion, men are more likely to look at a female’s face before other
areas when looking at pictures of naked women, according to a study by Emory University researchers.
And women will gaze at pictures of heterosexual sex longer than men, the study found.
Both findings, published in the journal Hormones and Behavior, shed light on sexual attitudes that
really aren’t all that mysterious when considered in a scientific light, Emory psychologist Kim Wallen
said.”)
38. There was a cleavage on display on Wednesday afternoon
There was a cleavage on display
On Wednesday afternoon
So pronounced was the cleavage
In the candidates’ opinion.
“In Washington, where professional women’s style statements are pointedly conservative,
Hillary Clinton’s cleavage has suddenly burst into one of the hottest topics of the Democratic
presidential race. The normally very conservative dresser’s slightly low neckline during a
July 18 campaign debate on education mostly went unremarked at first, until Washington
Post fashion writer Robin Givhan took notice and branded it a “small acknowledgment of
sexuality and femininity.”
39. Auntie Linettie makes the finest panty in Ypsilantie
Auntie Linettie in Ypsilanti makes
The prettiest panty, the Ypsipanty
Our beauteous auntie wears
The finest panty , the Ypsipanty.
PSILANTI, Mich. (AP) — Around here, history lives on with people’s underwear.
Two artists are selling hot pink underwear screen-printed with the word “Ypsipanty” as part of an
effort to keep alive the city’s historical place in the underwear business.
Linette Lao and Mark Maynard have sold nearly 200 pair of Ypsipanties
40. Your cleavage is my heavy haulage
Get off my bus, busty lady ,
But what is the big bus fuss ?
Your bust makes my butt miss
And heavily I miss the bus.
“A 20-year-old woman was told to get off a bus in southern Germany by the driver because she was too
sexy.
The woman, named only as Deborah, told a German national newspaper: “Suddenly he stopped the
bus. He opened the door and shouted at me ‘Your cleavage is distracting me every time I look into my
mirror and I can’t concentrate on the traffic. If you don’t sit somewhere else, I’m going to have to
throw you off the bus “
41. Grass cutting in bikinis improves quality by at least 40%
The bikini-clad ladies make
A fine job of mowing grass
The mowing improves by 40%
When it is done in bikinis
A recent study confirms
Grass cut in dress lacks body
Cutting in bikinis spells
Significant upgrade in quality.
“The women of Tiger Time Lawn Care offer to mow customers’ lawns dressed in bikini service
that attracts more attention to the ladies than the lawns.Beckman said the extra
attention was expected, but she looks on the bright side.“You get the attention but you
also get a tan, which I need,” she said. Owner Lee Cathey said the bikini service would
make mowing the lawn a lot more interesting, although the fee is slightly higher.
42. Naked people do not impress her much
This old man in the buff tried
To get her to look down there
But naked people do not impress her
After all that wear and tear.
“On July 6, a 68-year-old man showed up naked downtown, walking the streets during Gallery Walk, a
monthly social event in which people roam downtown, stopping in art galleries and shops. Gallery
owner Suzanne Corsano was locking up for the night when she encountered him on a sidewalk.
“Naked people don’t impress me,” said Corsano, 60. “But to be walking down the street like that. I just
looked straight at him, and he looked down. He was trying to get me to look down there, but I
wouldn’t.””
43. Spreading pissiculture
We are flushed with pride
At these marvelous musical loos
This way we spread toilet culture far
And drive away our blues.
(“BEIJING - They’re flush with pride in a southwestern Chinese city where a recently-opened
porcelain palace features an Egyptian facade, soothing music and more than 1,000 toilets spread out
over 32,290 square feet.Officials in Chongqing are preparing to submit an application to Guinness
World Records to have the free four-story public bathroom listed as the world’s largest, the state-run
China Central Television reported Friday.)
44. Nearly half of the Shanghai girls had sex with boys they had met, online
46% girls had sex with boys
They had just met online
We can’t understand how
One becomes pregnant online
Thank goodness ,the balance
Had sex entirely offline.
Shanghai: Nearly half of pregnant teens in China’s financial centre Shanghai met their partners on the
Internet, according to a newspaper report that also spotlighted widespread ignorance about sexual
health.Fully 46 per cent of the more than 20,000 girls who called the city’s pregnancy hot line during
the past two years said they had sex with boys they met online, the China Daily said, citing Dr. Zhang
Zhengrong of Shanghai’s No. 411 Hospital.”
45. In such provocative situations one cannot concentrate on our Lord and Master
With naked bodies staring down
From the billboard
It is rather difficult to meditate
On our master and Lord.
NEW YORK - A bidet company’s advertising plans in Times Square are too cheeky for the pastor of a
nearby church.Rev. Neil Rhodes, pastor of the interdenominational Times Square Church, is asking a
state court to block a billboard company from posting huge ads that feature naked buttocks with smiley
faces on them. The display is to go up on two sides of the Broadway building that houses Rhodes’
church, its Bible school and day-care center.
“You walk into a church building, you have naked bodies before your eyes, how are you going to close
your eyes and seek God?” Rhodes told the New York Post in an article published Sunday.
46. Bush takes his sweeping job seriously
Bush had proposed sweeping
Immigration changes
We are not clear as to why
He had to sweep all of them.
“President Bush has proposed sweeping immigration changes, which is pretty amazing when you
consider before he became president, Bush thought immigration was the sincerest form of flattery.” –
Jay Len
47. If you have name with an “i”and smilie without reasoni you can be a beauty queen y
If you are really randy
With the looks of a candy
You then are eye-Candy
With a name like Candi
And certainly not a disciple
Of Mahatma Gandhi.
“Have you thought about the field of competitive beauty pageantry? We have some photos from a
“school” in Bolivia that prepares young women for a long and rewarding career of tiara-wearing. If
you can smile for no reason whatsoever, and your name ends in an “i” even though it probably
shouldn’t - Bambi, Brandi, Randi, Candi, etc. - you may have royal potential. Think about it.”
http://blogs.reuters.com/category/themes/oddly-enough
48. Women seem undecided where to look
The last survey stated women
Looked at men’s crotches
The latest reveals that they
Actually look at men’s eyes
We request them to make up
Their minds once and for all
Where they actually look ,
Whether on the eyes or crotches.
According to a survey by internet firm Buy Specs4Less.co.uk , while men’s obsession with women’s
busts makes their eyes inadvertently turn towards them before roving to their behind and legs, women
are more drawn towards a man’s eyes.