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Grilled cheese sandwiches - Are they right for you?
- 1. Grilled Cheese Sandwiches Are they right for you?
- 2. Grilled Cheese Sandwiches You think you’re good enough for a grilled cheese sandwich? Do you know what the fuck you're getting into? Don’t kid yourself, shit is about to get real.
- 3. Grilled Cheese History No one knows where cheese comes from. There are rumors it has something to do with gangs or the Vatican, but don’t believe everything your friends say. Your friends lie to you ALL THE TIME. How old are you for fucks sake?
- 4. Cheese According to this picture there are at least 3 types of cheese. And let me tell you something - they are all delicious. You’re lucky you even know what cheese IS! Don’t forget that.
- 5. Don’t fuck this up A few years ago I had a chance to eat a grilled cheese sandwich. I thought I was too cool for school so I said no. You want to know what happened? DO YOU!?!??!?!
- 6. Consequences of not eating a grilled cheese sandwich. It started me down the path of ruin. Within 2 months I was on the street and working as a full time prostitute. I lost my job, my house, even my guns.
- 7. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
- 8. Grilled Cheese Sandwiches are loved Everyone that has ever tried a grilled cheese sandwich has loved them. Even assholes. But here is the thing. A lot of people get stuck on only using American cheese. Come on people are you fucking kidding me! It’s like you are wiping your ass with the statue of liberty.
- 9. So tired of your bullshit I don’t even know why I’m wasting my time. You obviously don’t understand what’s at stake.
- 10. I’ll give you another chance Look, I get it. Life is fucked. Everyday is like “What the fuck am I doing here? I didn’t ask for this?” And you fuck up. It’s part of being a human. So it’s cool. Honestly I believe in you. I like you. I used to be a lot like you. I know that seems crazy but it’s true. I really just want you to be happy.
- 11. Onward and upward I’m proud that you are going to take your grilled cheese sandwich experience more seriously. There are so many cheese options, it’s just, you know, wrong, to miss out. I just care is all.
- 12. Can I get a ride? My car got towed last month. It’s complete bullshit and I got one of those guys that advertises on TV to represent me. Seriously, if this goes as he says, I could be looking at a sweet payday. Real money. Fuck you money, if you know what I mean. But right now I’m kind of rideless, so if you could give me a lift, I’d totally appreciate it. And I promise, when I get that fucking giant settlement check, I’ll treat you to some really fucking amazing cheese like from England or some bullshit like that.
- 13. Thanks for your time!
Editor's Notes
- Let’s do this!
- Time to lay down the law!
- Reminder - see if you can find Men in Black on Netflix. That’s a really fun movie.
- Make sure to look them in the eye. You can do this! Stop thinking about the past. What’s done is done.
- Remember after the presentation to check under the seats for hidden cocaine.
- Reminder - See if Craigslist can do anything about the money you are still owed. You were a prostitute, not a prosti-free.
- Reminder - Take a breath.
- I’m so mad right now. What the fuck is wrong with people?
- Just leave. They don’t deserve you.
- Reminder - buy kitty litter.
- Remember - you are passionate because you care.
- I think they got the message but who knows. I just want to take a bubble bath and get drunk.