1. PAPA SMURF ON LEADERSHIP
It’s all about Preparation, Inspiration, and Fear
DAVID WHITE

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You wouldthinkthatafter5 yearsinseminaryIwouldhave a generallygoodideaof whatleadershipis,and
have a general philosophyof leadership. Buthonestly,evenat44 yearsoldI am still a beginnerwhenitcomes
to leadership,onlyjustbuilding myphilosophyandideaof whatLeadershiptrulyis.
Afterreadingseveral pilesof books,takingclassesbothinseminaryandatwork,I have come to realize avery
importantfact. Leadershipwasdescribedbestinanepisode of Scrubsbackin2004.
“Turk: Well, you'rebetter off watching good ol'Papa Smurf,here!Yeah,hesaysleadership
boils down to three things:Smurferation,Smurferation,Smurf.
J.D.:Preparation,Inspiration,and Fear?
Turk: You knowit.”1
Andunderstandingthisisthe mostimportantthing. Ittakespreparation,inspirationandfeartolead.
Preparation
The road to beinga leaderisa journeyone hasto take,andeveryjourneyisdifferent. Althoughthe giftswe are
givenfromGod are withus always,we needtofirstopenourheartsand soul to the HolySpiritand thentrain
our mindstoeffectivelyuse ourgifts.
It’sbeenan interestingroadthatI have takenthese past44 years,and for 37 of themI have beenJewish. Now
that I have beensavedIcan thinkback on themI can see manytimeswhere Yeshuahasmade himselfknownto
me,and eitherthroughignorance,shame,orjustsome plainstupidity,Imissedthe signsandcontinuedon
withouthislove.
In the summerof 1999 I interviewed withmydreamcompanyMicrosoft. Iwashiredand movedtoCharlotte NC
inNovemberof 1999. My wife andI have made our home here inCharlotte andin2001 we were blessedwith
our firstchildGabriel. Withourfirstchildcame many things,butthe most significant,atleastintermsof my
path to Christ,wasPleasantHill PresbyterianChurch. Gabe wasenrolledintothe preschoolinthe middleof the
1 (Lawrence and Nissel 2004)

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termwhenhe was 2 yearsold. Andthisstartedmy currentpath. PleasantHill ismade upof a greatgroup of
people. Throughthe yearstheyhave acceptedmyfamilyaspart of theirown,eventhoughIwas Jewishandmy
wife Catholic. Bothof mychildren,thensecondborninJulyof 2004, are treatedjustlike anychildof the
congregation. Afterseveralsummersof VacationBible School andayearof Hilltopgang,the weekdayYouth
Ministry,Ifeltitwas time formy childrentostart attendingchurch. I thoughttheyneededmore,butinrealityit
was me that neededmore. The summerof 2008 we startedto attendchurch weekly,andsomethingamazing
happened,Ifoundmyhome. Itwas here thatI truly came to an understandingof myfeelings,afeelingof being
home. My wife wasalreadyplanningonjoiningthe churchand we hadmade arrangementsforthe boys tobe
baptized,butIwas notpart of those plansyet. I setup a meetingwithBobJackand we discussedthe feelingsI
had and whatI wantedtodo, and ithappened. OnAugust24, 2008 my boysand I were baptized. Andthenthe
funreallystarted. Ihave alwaysenjoyedstudyingthingsfromanacademiclevel,andIjoinedtwoBible studies,
one withBob Jack,and the otherput on bythe Menof the Church.
My beingsaveddidnotoccur until justa little later. AlthoughIhadcome to understandmyfeelingsof being
home,thatfeelingthatcouldbringme totears didnot trulymake itself knowntome until October. I wouldsit
inservice andonce in a while tearupwhile the ministerwasdoingthe readingorgivinghissermon,andI
thought,like most,perhapsthe airisdry. But whatI was notgraspingwas thisfeelingof awarm all-
encompassinghug. Thatwas whatwas bringingme totears,and inOctober I was saved. Andat that momentI
trulyunderstoodwhatitwasmeantto be saved. Itwas not beingsavedfromsome unknownconqueringarmy
comingto getme,it was beingsavedfrommyself. Ibelieve thathadI continuedatthe pace and rate I was
goingI wouldhave hada Heart Attack bynow. The pressure andstressthat I wasputtingmyself throughwas
not healthy. Itwasnot healthyforme or for myfamily. Andat that momentinOctoberthatpressure andstress
dissipatedwithanethereal hug. Itwasas if Yeshuareachedaroundme and pulledme close toletme knowthat
everythingeverywhere wasgoingtobe fine. ThatI was loved,andthatas longas I felthishug andlove that it
didnot matterwhat else wasgoingonaroundme. That as longas whatI didI did forHim, I was doingright. I

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have scoffedatpeople thattell me thatGod spoke to them, now Iunderstandthatwhetheritisa Hug or justa
feeling,ora wordof encouragement,whattheyare feelingisGod’slove. Anditisthislove thatI want to share
withthe world.
One day I wasdrivingdownChoate Circle andsaw the Seminary. Andithitme,thiswas where Iwas to getmy
Master’sDegree. I readthroughthe catalogand thoughtI wouldgetmydegree ineitherOldTestamentorin
ChristianThought. ButwheneverIwouldexplainmyplansorputtheminwriting,Ialwaysseemedtobe moved
towardsMasters inDivinity.
ClassesstartedandI wasimmersedinthe worldof Christ,of Love and Forgiveness. Ihadthe opportunityto
learnthe originsof the church, the historyof Christianity. IlearnedaboutTheology,Iwasimmersedinaworld
inwhichI was an amateurand drankfrom the firehose! Itookmy firstleadershipcourse andIhadan
opportunitytolearnaboutteamsand teambuilding.
Thisclass tookme through the ideaof howteamsform, how teamsoperate,andhow teamssucceed. Itwas not
justabout howto leadteams,buthowto alsobe a part of a team. I learnedhow torecognize the stage a team
was on,whetheritwasforming,storming,norming,orperforming. Itwasmore than thatthough,it was
understandinghowtotake advantage of eachstage,how to move a team forwardalongthe stages,andhowto
ensure peakperformance of ateamregardlessof whatstage theyare on.It was aboutunderstandingwhena
teamwas stuck,whena teamwas unable toperform, andwhatto do if you hada badapple stuckamong a
great crop. It’simportantto realize thatteamsare made up of people,andinthe non-secularrealm, typically
volunteers,sotheirmotivationismuchdifference thaninthe secularworld. ButI will explainmore aboutthat
later.

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Foundations for Leadership
NextIfoundmyself inacourse withDr. KlipowitzcalledFoundationsforLeadership. Itwashere that I focused
on a Personal DevelopmentPlan. Thisclasswasnothingthat I hadexpected,butwasoutstanding.
Whentaskedwiththispersonal developmentplan,mymindwentwildwithideasandthenitstoppedshort,doI
reallywantto share witha professoratschool my shortcomings,sins,andareaswhere Ijustdon’tthinkIam
doingas well asI coulddo. AndI will admitthatthere are thingsthat are missingfrommyPersonal
Developmentplan thatIam still notcomfortable sharingwithanyone thoseareasinwhichIfeel Ineedtosee
change,growth,or possiblyjuststopsomethingthatIam doingwrong. But there are thingsin mypersonal
developmentplan,thatnowthat I have sat downandput thingsonpaper,I realize that there are thingsI always
thoughtI didexceptionallywell,thatIreallystinkat,andthere are othersthatI thoughtI was justbarely
graspingthat I didnotneedto develop. Ican’t saythat I enjoyed thatlookintoDavidWhite,butIwill sayI have
done quite abit of soul searching,praying,andlearningaboutmyself inputting itall together.
In reviewingmyPersonal DevelopmentplanIrealize thatIhave done a lotof work,but I still have a lotof work
to do. I am not ina rush to become apastor, butthenagain,there are dayswhenI am ina rush. I wouldlove to
preachon a Sunday. I have had the opportunityto officiate amarriage, andI wouldlove the joyof officiating a
baptism;Iam readyto serve Communionagain. ButI know that I needmore time,more study. Ineedtoaccept
that thingsdon’thappenovernight. IknowI needtofocusmore time on my family. Iknow Ineedto take a
FatherSon trip;I alsoneedto take a weekendandfocusonlyonmywife. Thenagain,Icoulduse a weekend
where Ijustgo out inthe woodsandfocuson nothingbutthe wind.
I hita majorhurdle inmylife backin Februaryof 2012 and foundmyself outof work. Microsoftletme go. This
was like beingdivorced,majorkickinthe pants. Godhad a change in plansfor me,andI neededtolearna
lesson,thatmyidentitywasnota MicrosoftEmployee,butafollowerof Christ. Ifounda jobwithDell quite
quicklyandI wentfromworkingfromhome 2 days a weektotravelingeveryweek. Iwouldleave brightand
earlyMondayMorning, andbe home justafterdinneronFridays. Notan ideal situation,butthe moneywas

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goodand the billswere beingpaid. ProblemwasIstartedHebrew duringthistime andfoundthatI reallydonot
have an affinityforlanguages,I knewthisfromHighSchool butI hoped. Isoonchangedmy majorfrom Divinity
to ChristianLeadership.
Thischange of directionwasnota drastic one,Ihad alreadybeentakingChristianLeadershipclassessince 2010
whenI firsttookTeamBuilding,FoundationsforLeadership,andManagingConflict. Iwasalreadypreparingto
be a ChristianLeader,Ijustdidnotrealize thatthiswasthe rightpath forme. I wantedtotake leadership
coursesbecause Ithoughttheywouldhelpme improve atwork,perhapsGodwastellingme all alongthatthis
was the pathI wasto be on.
Managing Conflict
At thistime, Ihad an opportunitytotake one of my favorite classes,ManagingConflict. One of thingsIbrought
withme to class wasthat everyone’sbabyisugly,butnoone believesthattheirbabyisugly. Your ideasare
your babiesandyouhave to be willingtoacceptcriticismtomake your babybetter. Ittakesconflictto improve
our babies.
Withoutconflictthere isnolife,noinnovation,andnocreativity. Withoutconflictwe wouldnothave the ability
to learnand growthroughdiversity. Withoutconflictwe wouldall be of asingularmind. Itis withinconflict
that we findourpassionsanddesires. ItiswithinconflictthatGodhelpsusbecome the best we couldeverbe.
Conflictisnotnew. Biblicallyconflicthasbeenhere since the beginning. AdamandEve rebel againstGodand
breakhisrules;theyallowedthemselvestobe ledastraybyevil,tobelievethatGodwas holdingout. They
decidedthattheywantedmore forthemselves. AbrahamargueswithGodoverthe destructionof Sodomand
Gomorrah. MosesquestionsGod’sintentions,wonderswhyGodwouldchoose someoneasuselessashimself.
ThroughthisConflictGodpushesMosesto be all that he couldbe.
Solomonfindshimselfmade the ultimatearbitratorof conflict,byGod. In 1 Kings10:24 Solomonissoughtafter
by everyone tosee andhearof hisWisdom. 1Kings3:16-28 accounts forthe most importantdecisionSolomon

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makes,andalsoexplains the difference betweenathose ina conflictwhowouldkill the ideaif itisnotone of
theirown,andone who iswillingtosacrifice forthe chance foran ideato live.
Conflictitself,atitsmostbasicform, comesintwobasic flavors. Conflictis eitherpersonal oritisimpersonal.
Conflictthatispersonal isnota conflictwhere anyone wins. Itisa conflictonlyof loss. Andinalmostall
situations,itiswiththisconflictthatbothsideslose something. Impersonal conflictisaconflict where all should
win. That whenthe conflictishandledcorrectlybyall,thatall win,there are nolosers,andwe are all the better
for this.
Whendealingwithimpersonal conflict,we are trulydealingwithameetingof minds,achance to increase the
value,create somethingnew,achance to move forwardinlife andlearn. Whendealingwithpersonal conflict
we are dealingwithsomethingcompletelydifferent. We are dealingoutside of logicandmore personal
feelings. Andsometimesconflictcrosses bothlines. Sometimesthatconflict,althoughisimpersonal atitstruest
definition,becomespersonal because of fearandpassion.
Duringmy time at MicrosoftI had the opportunitytoworkon manyprojects;one of the most controversial
projectsI workedonwasthe Service DeliveryPlanproject. Itwaswithinthisprojectthata tool wascreatedto
helpTechnical AccountManagersto documenttheirplanswiththe customeronmovingthe customerforward
and hopefullyincreasethe maturityof theirITdepartment. ButmostTechnical AccountManagersfoughtthis
ideathe entire time the projectwasinexistence. The perceptionof the projectwasthatthe projectwas a
chance for managementtomicro-manage the community,andatMicrosoft,perceptionisreality. Andasthe
naysayersgainedground,the projectlostmomentum.
Duringthis class andthe assignmentswithin Ilearnedquite abitaboutwhatI call impersonal conflict,the most
importantlessonthatIlearned,though,isthatitis difficulttocompletelyremoveoneselffromthe conflictand
make it purelyimpersonal. Personal conflictmakesitdifficulttohave purposefulproductive andconstructive

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conflict. Ihave noticedthatmost wantto personalize the conflictandtake offensetothose whodifferin
opinionoridea. Andthat we as a group tendto wanta loseras opposedtowantingeveryone towin.
Conflictresolutionbecomesverydifficult,if everyconflicthasapersonal perspective. Inthe OldTestamentthe
people of Israel continuouslylashoutagainstGod,and thenwhentheyfindthemselvesinperil,cryoutfor his
help. AndGod isalwaysthere;readytoaccept themback intohisarms. God teachesthat inconflict,one must
alwaysbe willingtoforgive,andthatGod forgivesabsolutely,itismanthat has issuesforgiving. We are taught
that forgivenessisimportant. ThatGodalwaysforgives,andinthe Lord’sPrayerwe are taught thatGod
forgivesusoursinsas we forgive otherswhosinagainstus.
In the storyof the servantwhohad no mercy,Mt 18:21 – 35 we are introducedtoa servantwhooweshis
mastera great debt. The Mastershowsthe servantmercy andforgiveshisdebt. Soonafterthe servantisfound
demandingpaymentof asmallerdebtfromanotherservant. Whenthe Masterfindsoutaboutthishe isdriven
to anger,the masterhad forgiventhe servant,butthe servantwasunable tofinditinhisheart to offer
forgivenesshimself. Ibelieve thatdebtandsinare exchangeableinthisstory.Thatthe “sin” againstyour
brotherfoundinMt 18:15 isthe same as the debtthe servantowesthe master. That ultimatelythere isno
amountof forgivenessyoushouldhave foryourbrother,because thereisnolimittothe forgivenessGodhasfor
us. That if we bindthere sinto ourselvesonEarth,we will carryitwithus inheaven,butif we release those
sins,we will be releasedourselvesfromitalways,Mt18:18.
In Dt 15:1-6, God commandsus to forgive ourbrothers,the debttheyowe us,everysevenyears,because the
Lord proclaimsthis. Laterin Dt 15:12-18 we are toldof how we shouldrelease servantsfromtheirdebts. It
mustbe done willingly,andmustbe done withageneroussupplyof foodanddrinkfromyour ownstores.
From a conflictperspective,we mustforgive,andmustforgive withall ourheartand spirit.
I trulybelievethatconflictisanecessityinlife. Thatinits basestformitis whattrulytiesus togetherasmen.
Conflictisnecessaryfortrue relationship. We mustbe willingtodisagree withourbrothers,toworktogetherto

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collaborate fora solutionthatnotonlyallowsusto grow as men,but allowsustoserve God at our best. In
orderfor us to helpthe churchgrow, we have to findbetterwaystodo it. The adage “No Pain,NoGain” istrue.
Withoutconflictwe cannotfindfaultinwhatwe are doing. We cannot findwaysto improve onwhatwe are
doing. We cannot innovate andinvigorate the Churchwithoutconflict. Itiswithinourconflictthatourpassions
bringforththe bestwaysto make all people livingDisciplesof Christ.
The ideathat we are to Love our God withall of our Heart, Mind,and Soul andthat we shouldLove our
Neighboraswe Love Ourselvesmeanswe are tohave relationship. Andwithinthatrelationshipwe have to
have conflict. Itis notthe conflictthatdefinesus,butthe wayinwhichwe deal withthatconflict. KennyRogers
saidit best“we have to knowwhentoholdem, know whento foldem, know whentowalkaway,andno when
to run.”
We all are competitors,collaborators,compromisers,avoiders,andaccommodators. Withinall of our
relationshipswe have todetermine whenwe mustbe one of these oract as some of these. We have to
understandthe situationandtake the time todecide whichpathwe needtotake. It iswithinthese pathsthat
we strengthenorweakenourrelationshipswithourfamilies,ourfriends,ourco-workers,ourcommunity,and
withGod. Abraham,Isaac,Moses,and Davidall understoodthistoa degree.Theyknew whentopushGodand
whentoback off. They knewwhentocollaborate andwhentoaccommodate. Betteryet,theyknew whento
change tactics, as AbrahamdidduringSodomandGomorrah, firstworkingtocompete,thenrealizingall he
coulddo wascompromise andsave Lot.
We spendourlives,these days,watchingTelevision,findingwaystoentertainourselves. Inwatchingthis,we
are watchingpeople deal withtheirconflictsinlife,be itconflictandcomedyinshowslike “BigBangTheory”or
conflictandpainlike “Sonsof Anarchy.” Bothshows,at theircore,are showsof how people deal with
relationshipsinlife,of howtheymove forwardwiththeirconflicts. The BigBang Theorydealswithconflict

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throughfriendshipandlove,where Sonsof Anarchydeal withconflictthroughbloodandpain. Butinthe end
bothshowsdeal withconflict.
We have to learn,asa people thatconflictisanecessityforrelationship. More importantly,we have tolearn
howto deal withconflictinsucha way as to strengthenthose relationships,nothurtthem. We have to learn
howto forgive absolutely,sowe canfindforgiveness,not onlyfromGod,butfrom ourselves.
At thispointI wasfocusedonearningmyMACL, my perspective hadchanged,mygoalswere knew,andGod
taught me a lesson,notjustinclassbut inlife. ThatI am notdefinedbywhatIdo, butwho I am inChrist. I am a
ChristianMan,not a Microsoft Employee. Ittookme quite a bitof time to learnthislesson,butafterlearning
the lessonIbelieveIbecame abetterChristian,abetterman,and a betterleader.
The Leader as a Communicator
Learningaboutcommunicationistough,namelyasyouprepare forleadership. There are timeswhenyou
realize thatyoucommunicate insucha way as to drive people awayinsteadof motivatingandinspiringthose
youlead.
FirestormbyRonSusek,speaksaboutChurchConflictsandthe lifecycleof afirestorm. Itexplainsthat
“Firestormshave anobservable lifecycle. Justasa firestorminnature can be predictedbyweatherpatterns,so
can patternsinhuman relationshipsreveal where agroupisin the lifecycleof afirestorm.” 5
Susekgoesonto
describe the 6 phasesof a Firestorm;sparks,sparksignitingafirestorm, firestorminfullfury,consumingwinds,
the final burn,and rebuildingonburnttimbers.
The Leaderas the Communicatorbecomesthe leadernotonlywhenitiscalm, butwhenitis storming. This
classbuiltso well off ManagingConflictandTeamBuilderthatthere were timeswhenitwasdifficultto separate
them.
5 (Susek 1999, Location 177)

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Managing the Organization
As mypath comesto a close inschool,the final preparationclassItookwas Managingthe Organization. We
focusedonputtingtogetherwhatwe hadlearnedsofar andwhat we were doinginlife. Iwasat a definite
disadvantage asIdid notwork fora non-profit,Iworkedinthe Secularworld. The restof the classall workedin
the non-secular. NeverdidIthinkof what I didwiththe BoyScouts of Americaas my workinginthe non-secular
world. I waswrong. AndI had the opportunitytolookat the workI do withthe Boy Scoutsas my ministry. Iput
togethera ProformaoutlininghowIwouldbuilda ScoutersCloset. The Missionof the ScoutersClosetwillbe to
remove the obstacle of uniformandequipmentcostssothatall eligibleyouthwhowishtobe a part of Scouting
will have the opportunity. We will dothisbysupplyinguniformstoindividual scouts,inneed,andsupplying
equipmenttoscoutingunitstobe usedbythose scoutswhodo not have accessto that equipment. Thiswill not
be a small endeavorandwill require the partnershipof all three districtswithinthe MecklenburgCounty
Council. We hope that byremovingthe financial obstacleof uniformsandequipment,more youngmenand
youngwomenwill benefitfromthe skillsandmoralslearnedthoughScouting.
Today I findmyself asaSolutionArchitectatCompuCom, Ididnotfindthisrole,andthey foundme. I was
actuallytoldbymy hiringmanagerthatpart of the reasontheywere willingtohire me wasthat fact that I was in
school earningmy Master’sDegree,thisshowedthemIwaswillingtolearn,willingtoimprove. Inowwork
fromhome,have time tobe withmyfamily,andvolunteerquite abitof time withthe Boy Scoutsof America.
I compare my journeytothat of a busride,where Igeton but I cannotget off until Iam told. In the bookHarry
Potterand the Prisonerof Azkaban, Harryfindshimself alone inthe darklookingforhelp,whenoutof nowhere
a bus appearsto sweephimaway,the KnightBus. The KnightBusis transportationforwaywardwizards. The
ride seemsroughandtumble. Itsqueezesbetweencars,acceleratesanddeceleratesquicklyandtossesHarry

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around. The olderwizardsdonotseemto notice the ride andnap inbedsstrungalong the floor. Eventhough
the bedsare tossedaround,those olderwizardsdonotseemtomind.17
Inspiration
It isthroughthe grace of God that we findourselveswithhiminourlives. He lovesusandforgivesus. Itis
throughGod that we as leadersfindinspiration.
It isthroughour own personal Theologyof Leadershipthatwe findourbasisfor inspiration. The verydefinition
of Leadershipisslowlybuiltthroughexperiences,education,success,andfailuresof one’slife. Fromchildhood,
throughadolescents,teenage years,youngadultyears,totoday,eachactivity,class,andpersonmet,affects
howone createstheirpersonal worldview,theirpersonal tastes,andtheirpersonal theologies.
One the strongestinfluencesof Leadershipupon mypersonal theologyisthe time Ispentinthe Military. The
MilitaryteachesmanythingsaboutLeadership,mostof themcenteredonhonor,courage,noexcuses,and
drive. Theyteachthat Leadershipisearnedthroughamutual respectof the Leaderand theirsoldiers.
The firstthingtheyteach isthat a leaderswill neverasktheirsoldierstodoa task theythemselveswouldnotdo.
A leaderwhodirectshissoldierstocleanthe barracksmust be willingtograba broom and helpsweepthe floor.
Thiswould,at first,seemtocontradictthe thoughtthat the leadershouldbe above those theylead,butthat
thoughtiswrong. Leadershipisnotalwayshierarchal,butinsteadcanbe thrust uponall dependinguponthe
situationandskillsnecessarytoaccomplishthe missionandtasksat hand. A leaderwhoiswillingtograb the
broom,letshissoldiersknowthatthe tasktheyare accomplishing isimportant,it’simportantenoughtobe
done byeveryone,notjustbythe lowestrankingindividuals.
17 (Rowling1999, 31-42)

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Christteachesthislessontowardthe endof hisearthlyexistence. InJohn13:1-7 Jesuswashesthe feetof his
disciples.
WASHINGHIS DISCIPLES’FEET
Justbeforethe PassoverFeast,Jesusknew thatthetime had cometo leave this world to go to
the Father.Having loved his dearcompanions,hecontinued to lovethem rightto the end.It
wassuppertime.TheDevil by nowhad Judas,son of Simon theIscariot,firmly in his grip, all
set forthe betrayal.
Jesusknewthatthe Fatherhad puthim in complete chargeof everything thathe camefrom
God and wason his way backto God.So he gotup fromthe suppertable,set aside hisrobe,
and puton an apron.Then he poured waterinto a basin and began to wash the feetof the
disciples, drying themwith his apron.When hegotto Simon Peter, Peter said,“Master,you
wash my feet?”
Jesusanswered,“You don’tunderstand now whatI’mdoing,butitwill beclear enough to you
later.”
Peter persisted,“You’renotgoing to wash my feet—ever!”
Jesussaid,“If I don’twash you,you can’tbepartof whatI’mdoing.”
“Master!”said Peter.“Not only my feet, then.Wash my hands!Wash my head!”
Jesussaid,“If you’vehad a bathin the morning,you only need yourfeetwashed now and
you’reclean fromhead to toe. My concern,you understand,isholiness,nothygiene.So now
you’reclean.But notevery oneof you.”(Heknew who wasbetraying him.That’swhy he said,
“Notevery oneof you.”) Afterhehad finished washing theirfeet,he tookhis robe,put it back
on,and wentbackto his place at the table.
Then hesaid, “Do you understand whatIhavedoneto you?You addressmeas ‘Teacher’and
‘Master,’and rightly so.Thatis whatI am.So if I, the Masterand Teacher,washed yourfeet,
you mustnowwash each other’sfeet.I’velaid down a pattern foryou.WhatI’vedone,you
do.I’monly pointing outtheobvious.A servantis notranked abovehismaster; an employee
doesn’tgiveordersto the employer.If you understand whatI’mtelling you,actlike it—and
live a blessed life.18
Thismessage isthe mostimportantlessoninLeadership,eventhoughitispointedoutthat‘A servantisnot
rankedabove hismaster;”19
Christalsois teachingusthat there isnothingbeneaththe master. Thatina time
18 (Peterson 2005,Jn 12:50-13:17)
19 (The Holy Bible: English Standard Version 2001,Jn 13:16)

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where youwalkthroughdungand dirt,where feetare neverclean,thatevenGodiswillingtobendoverand
washhispeople’sfeet. And,Godbeingthe sovereignone,withnoneabove him, thenall LeaderssentbyGod
shouldbe willingtodothe same. That there isnothingtoomenial,dirty,ordisgusting,thatthe leadershould
not do,and there isnothingthe leadershouldtellhispeople todo,thathe himself wouldnotdo.
The Military teachesthat Leadershipisacallingfromabove. Tobe a Leader,youmustbe calleduponfrom
those whooutrankyou,who leadyou. Whenlookingatthe story of Moses,we findMosesthe day afterhe
killedanEgyptianforkillingaJewishslave. “The nextdayhe wentout andsaw twoHebrewsfighting.He asked
the one in the wrong,“Why are youhittingyourfellow Hebrew?”The mansaid,“Whomade you rulerandjudge
overus?”20
We may sayto someone whotellsuswhattodo “Who diedandmade you boss.” The ideais the
same,Leadershipisgranted. Inthe Militaryitisgrantedby those whooutrankyou. You are promotedintoa
positionof Leadership,be itthatof a NCO(Non-CommissionedOfficer),oranOfficer,thisisa promotioninto
Leadership. Inthe Corporate world,PeerLeadersandPeople Leadersare hiredandpromotedfromwithin. In
The Bible,Leadersare calledbyGod. God doesnotchoose leadersfromthe qualitiesandtraitsthatman calls
leadersto. “But God toldSamuel,“Looksaren’teverything.Don’tbe impressedwithhislooksandstature.I’ve
alreadyeliminatedhim.Godjudgespersonsdifferentlythanhumansdo.Menandwomenlookat the face;God
looksintothe heart.”21
This isa difficultthingformanto trulyunderstand. Godcares not the way youlook,the
colorof your hair,youreyes. He cares not if youare bigor small,fator thin,strongor weak. God has hisown
methodsforchoosing. Godpromotesthose He wishestopromote andhumblesthose He wishestohumble.
““You didn’tchoose me,remember;Ichose you,andputyou inthe worldto bear fruit,fruitthatwon’tspoil. 22
God choosesthose he wishestobe leaders,he choose Moses,Jacob,Isaac,Daniel,andDavid. He choose
Matthew,Mark, Luke,John,James,Thomas,andevenJudas. God choose,notthose whowe wouldfindtobe
20 (The New International Version 2011,Ex 2:13-14)
21 (Peterson 2005,1 Sa 16:7)
22 (Peterson 2005,Jn 15:16)

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great leaders,butwhathe foundtobe whatwas necessarytoleadduringthe timesandthe occasion. God
knewwhatwas necessaryforthe missionandchose aleaderwhowouldbe able toaccomplishGod’sgoals. God
callshisleadersathisown time whenhe isreadyandneedsa leader.
God doesnot call the extraordinary,butthe ordinary,tobe hisleaders. Lookat Moses,he arguedwithGod,
feelinghisinadequacies,hisstammerandstutterwouldmake himapoorleaderof Israel.YetGod knewHe had
chosenthe correct man forthe job. “Mosesraised anotherobjectiontoGod:“Master, please,Idon’ttalkwell.
I’ve neverbeengoodwithwords,neitherbefore norafteryouspoke tome.I stutterand stammer.” God said,
“Andwho doyou thinkmade the humanmouth?Andwhomakessome mute,some deaf,some sighted,some
blind?Isn’titI,God? So, getgoing.I’ll be rightthere withyou—withyourmouth!I’ll be rightthere toteachyou
whatto say.”23
AndwhenGod chose Gideontosave Israel,Gideoncouldnotbelieve thischoice ashishouse wasone of the
weakest,notthe strongest. “Gideonsaidtohim, “Me,my master?How and withwhat couldI eversave Israel?
Look at me.My clan’sthe weakestinManassehandI’mthe runt of the litter.” God saidto him, “I’ll be with
you.Believe me,you’lldefeatMidianasone man.”24
WhenChristfoundPeterandJohn,theywere uneducatedfisherman. Butthese twomenstoodtall amongstall.
The logicGod usedto choose themconfusingthose whocouldnotor wouldnotunderstandGod’slogicintheir
choosing. ButGod knewthat theywere twomenwillingtoleave all thattheyknew andhadto follow Christ.
“Theycouldn’ttake theireyesoff them—PeterandJohnstandingthere soconfident,sosure of themselves!
Theirfascinationdeepenedwhentheyrealizedthese twowere laymenwithnotraininginScripture orformal
education.Theyrecognizedthemascompanionsof Jesus,butwiththe manrightbefore them, seeinghim
standingthere soupright—sohealed!—whatcouldtheysayagainstthat?”25
23 (Peterson 2005,Ex 4:10–12)
24 (Peterson 2005,Jdg 6:15–16)
25 (Peterson 2005,Acts 4:13-14)

16. Page | 15
God callsleaderstohelp othersuse the giftsHe has giventhem, tobothaccomplishhismission,butalsokeep
the leaderfromburningout. God callsus to accomplishHistasks,to accomplishHismission. We dothis,not
justby tellingsomeone towalkoverthere,buttohelpthemutilize the verygiftsgiventothembyGod. Saying
“to get itdone rightI have to do it myself,”goesagainstthe veryfabricof whyGodgrants gifts.“Each personis
givensomethingtodothat showswhoGod is: Everyone getsinonit,everyone benefits.”26
Asleaders,partof
our task at handis helpingdevelopanduse others,toutilize the verygiftseachone of themhasbeengivento
helpGodaccomplishhistask. “You can easilyenoughseehow thiskindof thingworksbylookingnofurther
than yourownbody.Your bodyhas many parts—limbs,organs,cells—butnomatterhow manyparts youcan
name,you’re still one body.It’sexactlythe same withChrist.Bymeansof hisone Spirit,we all saidgood-bye to
our partial andpiecemeal lives.We eachusedtoindependentlycall ourownshots,butthenwe enteredintoa
large and integratedlifeinwhich hehasthe final sayin everything.”27
We dothisby delegation. We cannotdo the missionof Godon our own,Moseshad Aaron tohelphim. And
evenwithAaron’shelpMosesstill wasunabletoaccomplishall onhisown. “WhenMoses’father-in-lawsawall
that he was doingforthe people,he said,“What’sgoingonhere?Whyare youdoingall this,and all byyourself,
lettingeverybodyline upbefore youfrom morningtonight?”28
We as leaderscannotattempttoaccomplish
God’smissiononour own,we have notbeengrantedthe giftsor the energy,the missionof the leaderisto
developothersandallowthemtoaccomplishthe missionhandedtothem. We do not askour eyestohear or
our earsto speak,insteadwe letoureyesdothe functionof an eye,andthe ear to functionasan ear,so must
we letthose whocan sweepthe streetstosweepthe streets,andthose thatcancount moneytocount money.
The giftsgiventothose we leadiswonderful,“Now toeachone the manifestationof the Spiritisgivenforthe
commongood. To one there isgiventhroughthe Spiritamessage of wisdom, toanothera message of
26 (Peterson 2005,1 Co 12:7)
27 (Peterson 2005,1 Co 12:12)
28 (Peterson 2005,Ex 18:14)

17. Page | 16
knowledge bymeansof the same Spirit,toanotherfaithbythe same Spirit,toanothergiftsof healingbythat
one Spirit,toanothermiraculouspowers,toanotherprophecy,toanotherdistinguishingbetweenspirits,to
anotherspeakingindifferentkindsof tongues,andtostill anotherthe interpretationof tongues. Allthese are
the work of one and the same Spirit,andhe distributesthemtoeachone,justas he determines.”29
Mosesfather-in-lawexplaineditbest,“Thisisnoway to go aboutit.You’ll burnout, andthe people rightalong
withyou.Thisis waytoo muchfor you—youcan’tdothis alone.Now listentome.Letme tell youhowtodo this
so that God will be inthiswithyou.Be there forthe people before God,butletthe mattersof concernbe
presentedtoGod.Your jobis to teachthemthe rulesand instructions,toshow themhow tolive,whattodo.
Andthenyou needtokeepa sharpeye outfor competentmen—menwhofearGod,menof integrity,menwho
are incorruptible—andappointthemasleadersovergroupsorganizedbythe thousand,bythe hundred,byfifty,
and byten.They’ll be responsibleforthe everydayworkof judgingamongthe people.They’llbringthe hard
casesto you,but inthe routine casesthey’llbe the judges.Theywill share yourloadandthatwill make iteasier
for you.If you handle the workthisway,you’ll have the strengthtocarry outwhateverGodcommandsyou,and
the people intheirsettingswill flourishalso.”30
God expectsfromusa service of teamwork,not me work. We are not to be doingall the work,but pulling
togetherthe bodyto dothe work. “So the Twelve calledameetingof the disciples.Theysaid,“Itwouldn’tbe
rightfor us to abandonour responsibilitiesforpreachingandteachingthe Wordof God to helpwiththe care of
the poor. So,friends,choose sevenmenfromamongyouwhomeveryonetrusts,menfull of the HolySpiritand
goodsense,andwe’ll assignthemthistask.Meanwhile,we’ll sticktoourassignedtasksof prayerand speaking
God’sWord.”31
The disciplesunderstoodthis,pickingthose to accomplishnecessarytaskswhilewe focusupon
29 (The New International Version 2011,1 Co 12:7-11)
30 (Peterson 2005,Ex 18:17–23)
31 (Peterson 2005,Ac 6:2–4)

18. Page | 17
our owntasks,and the summationof the whole equalsmore thanthe sumof its parts. We become a greater
force whenwe worktogether,thenif we workapart.
God prunesleaders,he takesfromusthe deadoldand diseasedbranches,sothatourhealthybranchesmay
produce healthyfruit. “Iam the Real Vine andmy Fatheristhe Farmer.He cuts off everybranchof me that
doesn’tbeargrapes.Andeverybranchthat isgrape-bearinghe prunesbacksoitwill bearevenmore.”32
God
makeshisleadersbetterbyremovingthe sinfromourlives,justaswe mustdie toChristwhenwe become
Christians,we mustcontinue toletthose partsof our livesandof ourselves,thatdoesnotbearfruit,and letit
witheranddie,we muststopfeedingthose thingsthatkeepusfromGod. It isthrough ourexperiences,
challenges,eventhe drudgeryof ourdayto day,that God prunesandfine tunesus,sothat we may utilize his
giftsto the bestof our ability. We mustperceiverthroughthe toughtimes,because atthe end,Godwins,and
thisisour onlyendgoal,God’s success. Ourmission,be itcleaningthe church,ministeringtothe sick,building
an orphanage,orhelpingpeoplefindChrist,all hasthe same endgoal,God’ssuccess. Andeverypartof that
mission,everyexperience,isGodtestingandchangingus,transformingusintothe tool he needstodo the job.
As a leaderwe mustletGodprune us, and as a leaderwe are the example forourfollowers,if we canaccept
pruning,ourfollowerswill acceptpruningalso. “Consideritasheergift,friends,whentestsandchallenges
come at youfromall sides.Youknowthat underpressure,yourfaith-life isforcedintothe openandshowsits
true colors.So don’ttry to get outof anythingprematurely.Letitdoitswork so youbecome mature andwell-
developed,notdeficientinanyway.”33
Those whoGod callsmust rememberitwasGodwho calledthem. “Firstpride,thenthe crash—the biggerthe
ego,the harderthe fall.”34
Eventhoughwe mayhelpGod accomplishgreatthings,itisGod that is
accomplishingthesetasks,itisGodwhomdirectsus, andsupportsus,and it isGod who movesthe obstacles
32 (Peterson 2005,Jn 15:1)
33 (Peterson 2005,Jas 1:2–4)
34 (Peterson 2005,Pr 16:18)

19. Page | 18
out of our way. JimmyCliff saiditright,“Ican see clearlynow the rainis gone. I can see all obstaclesinmyway.
Gone are the dark cloudsthat had me blind.”35
ItisGod who doesthisforus, itis God whousesusto do thisfor
others. In the enditis, andalwayswill be,God. We mustnot be boastful orprideful forthe accomplishments
God makesthroughus,we must be humble. We are warnedthroughproverbsof the verydanger of pride,
“Pride landsyouflaton yourface;humilitypreparesyouforhonors.”36
Throughourpride we fosterevil,if we
start takingcreditfor God’saccomplishments,we make ourselvesequal toGodandwe can become ourown
idol. We decide thatwe are no longerthe servantanymore,butthe Master,and there can be onlyone Master,
and that isGod. “Christ’slife showedme how,andenabledme todoit. I identifiedmyselfcompletelywithhim.
Indeed,Ihave beencrucifiedwithChrist.Myegoisno longercentral.Itisno longerimportantthatI appear
righteousbefore youorhave yourgoodopinion,andIam no longerdriventoimpressGod.Christlives inme.
The life yousee me livingisnot“mine,”butitis livedbyfaithinthe Sonof God, wholovedme andgave himself
for me.I am notgoingto go back on that.”37
“Its commonknowledge that“Godgoesagainstthe willfulproud;
God givesgrace to the willinghumble.”SoletGod workhiswill inyou.Yell aloudno to the Devil andwatch him
scamper.Say a quietyestoGod and he’ll be there innotime.”38
God callson leaderstoserve,notbe served. ““You’ve observedhow godlessrulersthrow theirweightaround,
howquicklya little powergoestotheirheads.It’snotgoingto be that way withyou.Whoeverwantstobe great
mustbecome a servant.Whoeverwantstobe firstamong youmustbe yourslave.Thatis whatthe Sonof Man
has done:He came to serve,notbe served—andthentogive awayhislife inexchange forthe manywhoare
heldhostage.”39
Justas we learnedearlier,before Christdied,he washedthe feetof the disciples,andindoing
thishe didmore thanwash the feetof those he led,he servedthemasa servant. The job of washingfeet,was
keptfor the lowestof servants. Thiswasa nastyjob,it wasmore thanjustthe dustof the road,and it was
35 From Jimmy Cliff’s song“I can see clearly now” lyrics werememorized years ago in Choir
36 (Peterson 2005,Pr 29:23)
37 (Peterson 2005,Ga 2:20–21)
38 (Peterson 2005,Jas 4:6–8)
39 (Peterson 2005,Mt 20:25–28)

20. Page | 19
everythingtheywouldwalkthrough. Justbeforethe washingof feet,the discipleswere arguingoverwho
wouldbe the greatestof them,as toldinLuke 22:24. Gentile leadersgave eachothergreatnessandtitles,they
expectedtobe served. Theirrolesasleaderswastobe served,nottoserve,Godexpectsusto serve. Justas he
servesus!
LeadershipisacallingfromGod. Althoughitmaynot feel like agiftfromGod,to be calledto doGod’s bidding
is,initself,agift. Leadershipdoesnotmeanthatyouare placedabove,butinsteadthatyouare calledtoserve,
to serve God,and to serve those whomyouare leading. There isnothingthatGodwouldnotdo for hispeople,
so there isnothingthatis belowyou. Godcall’swhomhe wishestocall,notthe extraordinary,butthe ordinary,
and he callsuponthemon hisschedule. Godcallsleaderstohelpothersuse the giftsgiventothem. God
sanctifieshisleaders,he setsthemapart. Andthe leadermustremember,thatwhattheydo,theydo through
God. It isnot “lookat what I have accomplished”but“lookatwhatGod has accomplished, andIwasblessedto
be a part of that.”
It’snot justour personal theologythatdefinesus,buta constantreturnto devotionwithGodthat allowsusto
stay inspiredandgivesusthe abilitytoinspireothers.
We live verybusylivesasleaders. Ours daysstart well beforedawn,andendwell aftersundown. We nolonger
live ina worldthatis ruledbythe sun. Our daysno longerstartjustbefore dawnandendjust aftersunset. We
go to bedjustas connectedaswe go towork. Communicationwithour co-workers,neighbors,family,friends,
and spousescanoccur at anytime fromany place. Facebook,LinkedIn,Twitter,Snapchat,Pinterest,we are
connectedelectronicallytothe worldwhereverwe have aComputer,Laptop,Tablet,orsmartphone. “We
cannot turnback the handsof time. Our 24/7 worldisnot goingto change. Life will onlygetmore intense.”40
40 (Sleeth 2012,25)

21. Page | 20
The more we getconnectedtothe world,the lessconnectedwe are outsidethe world. The more time we
spendsocializing,the lesstimewe spendpraying,meditating,reading,andstudying,the lesstimewe spend
reflecting,the lesstime we spendindevotionof ourCreator,our Father,the Son,and the HolySpirit.
Yet the busierwe getthe more we needa chance to disconnectfromthe world,andreconnectwithGod. There
isthisconstant naggingat the back of yourbrain,it isas if God wrote “out the plan in [us],carvingiton the
liningof [our] hearts.”41
Godmade usto be relational innature,notjustconnectedamongstourselves,but
mostimportantly,tobe connectedtohim. God wantsto be ina relationshipwithus,butforusto be in a
relationshipwithGod,we mustconnecttoGod. This ismore than justacceptingChristintoour heart,thisisa
chance to be deeplyconnectedtoGod,to be connectedtoGod withall of our mind,heart,andsoul.
To connectwithGod, we mustmake time for God. Thisismore thanjustthe hourwe give himon Sundaysfor
church. It’snot our spendingtime atschool,preparingforclasses,preppingforwork,ortakingtime withour
families. Itisa time of “solitude,silence,andunceasingprayer.”42
Itisa time for devotion.
Thistime of devotionisa time setaside forGod. PhillipKellersaysthat“A flockthat isrestless,discontented,
alwaysagitatedanddisturbedneverdoeswell”43
anditisnot justthe flockthathe isreferringto,itisthe
individualmembersof thatflock. If youare restless,discontented,oragitatedanddisturbed,youwill not
functionatyour best. The way to findpeace isto findtime toreconnectwithyourFather,andofferupa time of
devotiontohim.
Dr. C. C. Albertsonbreaksthe weekdownforus,“There are 168 hoursin eachweek.Fifty-sixof these we spend
insleep.Of the remaining112 hours,we devote 48 to labor.Thisleavessixty-fourhours,of whichletusassign
twelve hoursforourdailymeals.(Thisallowsthirtyminutesforeachmeal,andone-and- one-halfhoursextrato
41 (Peterson 2005,Heb 8:10)
42 (Nouwen 1981,Back Cover)
43 (Keller 2007)

22. Page | 21
promote gooddigestion.) We have leftfifty-twohours,net,of consciousactive life todevotetoanypurpose to
whichwe are inclined.”44
52 hours a weekwe have tosetaside for anythingwe wish. We are toldto ““Give
back to Caesarwhat isCaesar’sand to God whatis God’s.”45
Shouldwe notdo the same withour most
importantresource,time! Andif we are tithingourtime toGod, evenif we give 16 hours a week,afterchurch,
youthgroup,scouts,bible study,andlife groups,youprobablyonlyhave about three andahalf hoursleft,or
thirtyminutesaday.
Thirtyminutesperday,butwhat shouldwe dowiththose thirtyminutes? Henri Nouwentellsusthat“solitude
isthe furnace of transformation. Withoutsolitude we remainvictimsof oursocietyand continue tobe
entangled.”46
We have tosetaside those thirtyminutesforsolitude,foralone time. We needtofindaplace
where we can be unbotheredbythe world,where ourcell phones,tablets,computers,TV’s,telephones,where
the worldcannot find usor touch us.
Nextwe mustfindsilence. “Silence isthe home of the Word. Silence givesstrengthandfruitfulnesstothe
Word.”47
It isnot enoughtobe alone withourselves,we mustalsofindaplace where the dinof the worlddoes
not affectus. We live ina worldwhere silence isdeafening. Where white noiseisthe norm. Itwas not longago
where youcouldfindyourself athome,withoutanysound,now thatisnot the case. The casual humof the
heatingandair system,the white noiseof computers. The soundsof passingcars,the roar of planesflyingover
your head. All these noisesinterruptourabilitytofindquiet. Iam not recommendingthatyoubuildaquiet
room inyour home,asimple pairof noise dampeningheadphonescansuffice,andperhapsyoujustneedto
travel away,finda neighborhoodpark,ora prayerroomat yourlocal church.
44 (Tan 1996)
45 (The New International Version 2011,Mk 12:17)
46 (Nouwen 1981,13)
47 (Nouwen 1981,34)

23. Page | 22
Withinall thiswe mustlearnhowto calm ourselves. Ourworldisbusy. It isloud. We are pulledinsomany
directions,sometimeswe are unsure of whichwaytogo. Our prioritiesgetjumbled. We mustlearnto calm
ourselves. IntrainingBrazilianJujitsuIhave learnedthat one of the mostimportantthings isthatyou cannot
panic. If youhave everwatchedan MMA or UFC fightyou may hear,fromone of the fighter’scorners,aword
yelledoutbytheircoach,calma. “Calmaquite literallytranslatesto‘Calm’ or‘Relax. [InBJJand inlife] itis
essential tofirstrelax orcalmdowninsteadof tryingto franticallybulldoze your waythroughopposition. Once
calmeddownyoucan logicallythinkthroughthe situation,listentothe coach’sinstructionandnotonlyavoid
the dangerbut alsoturn it aroundto workin yourfavor.”48
The same can be saidaboutour spiritual lives,
before we canconnectto God, we have to calm ourselvesdown,sothatwe can listentoHis instructionsandnot
onlyavoiddanger,insteadturnitaroundto workin Hisfavor.
We mustpray. Henri Nouweninstructsustopray of the heart,andthere are three characteristicsof thisprayer.
“The prayerof the heartisnurturedby short,simple prayers. The prayerof the heartis unceasing. [And] the
prayerof the heartis all-inclusive.”49
The prayersof the heart are nurturedby short,simple prayers. Noteveryprayermustlast30 minutesormore.
Theycan be short,simple,andtothe point,suchas “Lord, please keepandprotectme,guide me,andlove me.”
Justas we converse withourfamiliesinamethodthatrequiresaback and forth,somust we converse withGod.
If your prayerslastthe whole time of yourdevotion,whendoyougive Goda chance to answerback? “And
whenyoucome before God,don’tturn that intoa theatrical productioneither.All these peoplemakinga
regularshowout of theirprayers, hopingforstardom!Do youthinkGod sitsina box seat? Here’swhatI want
youto do: Finda quiet,secludedplace soyouwon’tbe temptedtorole-playbefore God.Justbe there assimply
and honestlyasyoucan manage.The focuswill shiftfromyouto God,and youwill begintosense hisgrace.The
worldisfull of so-calledprayerwarriorswhoare prayer-ignorant.They’re full of formulasandprogramsand
48 (Wade 2014)
49 (Nouwen 1981,63)

24. Page | 23
advice,peddlingtechniquesforgettingwhatyouwantfromGod. Don’tfall forthat nonsense.This isyourFather
youare dealingwith,andhe knowsbetterthanyouwhatyou need.WithaGod like thislovingyou,youcanpray
verysimply.”50
The prayersof the heart mustbe unceasing. Paul tellsthe Thessaloniansinhisfirstletterto“Be cheerful no
matterwhat; pray all the time;thankGod no matterwhathappens.”51
Althoughourtime of devotionisatime
for usto sit withGod quietlyandprayandspeakwithhim, we shouldcontinue topraywithhimoutside of this
time. We shouldprayall the time.
“The final characteristicof the prayerof the heart isthat it includesall of ourconcerns.”52
Whenwe sitdownto
speakwithGod,he knowswhatwe want,need,andfeel. Thisisyourtime totell himall,everything,tolayitall
out onthe table. And regardlessof howyousayit,God will understand.
Fear
Fear,by far,is the toughestof the group. The personof the leaderisnotonlydefinedbytheirabilitiesandskills,
but alsoby theirfaults. Itishowtheydeal withthese faultsandcontrol themthattrulydefinesthe personof
the leader. Itis through“fear”that we manage our faults. In readingandreflectinguponthe book Overcoming
the DarkSide of Leadership Iwas able to lookuponmydark side.
Throughmy childhoodandintoCollege Ihadthisinnate needtobe accepted. Althoughmypersonalityisthatof
an outgoingintrovert,Ilike tobe liked. Ilike tobe wanted,andthroughoutthistime Iwasneitherlikednor
wantedmuch,and ithurt. I foundmyplace in the worldwhenItook myfirstjobin InformationTechnology,or
IT.
50 (Peterson 2005,Mt 6:5–9)
51 (Peterson 2005,1 Th 5:16–18)
52 (Nouwen 1981,69)

25. Page | 24
In IT we appreciate pride,we appreciateself-confidence,andinfactwe appreciate arrogance. The IT field
requiresasense of self-confidence,abelief thatyoucando what yousay youcan do,withoutquestion. We
pushpeople tothe edge of theirknowledgemakingthemlearnmore andmore ata firehose pace. Butwithin
thiswe tendto breedarrogance and narcissisticpersonalities. Ittakesa strongpersonto notstepoutside pride
and intoarrogance.
In “Overcomingthe DarkSide of Leadership”we explore ourdarksides. We explore the “innerurges,
compulsions,anddysfunctionsof ourpersonality” 53
But inorderto understandthose partsof our personalities
that are dark,we must firstunderstandwhere theycome from. These dysfunctionsare notalwayspartof usat
birth,buttheyare born withinus. Theycome fromour experiences,theyare shapedwithinuseveryday. Itis in
understandinghowtheyare shapedthatwe can,in some ways,understandhow tokeepthematbay,and when
it maybe necessarytouse themalso.
Thisis notone of those booksthat youreadonce andwalkaway from, nor isit one that isfinishedinasecondor
thirdreading,butinsteadisa bookwhichrequiresmultiplepassesandchancestoaffectourlives.
In mylife Ihave to understandmydark side,andunderstandhow tocontrol itscontrol overme,understand
howto keepitat bay, and understandhowitshapesme. Ideal withissuesof arrogance anddepression. In
some waysI am the narcissisticleader,andattimesthe codependentleader. Ifighthardto not allow myself to
geta bighead. My wife fightshardfor me to not countmy chickensbefore theyhatch. Andwe,togetherfight
my abilityto,attimes,fall deepintomyself.
One otherarea we my fearisnot leading,justdoing. Myfatherinlaw toldme duringhislastvisit,“Thatpeople
do notvolunteertowatchme work,butto work.” There isa song I like tolistento,byLazloBane,called Iam no
53 (McIntosh and Rima,Sr. 2007,27)

26. Page | 25
Superman,andthe lyricsgoas follows, “ButIcan't dothisall onmy own, No,I know,I'm noSuperman,I'mno
Superman”54
As a Leaderwe mustrememberwhere we came fromandhow we got there. We mustunderstandwhat
inspiresusandconstantlybe inspired. Andwe mustrememberthatwe are not superman,we have faultswe
mustwork to fix.
54 (Bane 2000)

27. Page | 26
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