This document defines and explains common corporate buzzwords and phrases used in job postings and interviews. It reveals the true meanings behind positive-sounding terms like "competitive salary" (we pay less), "fast-paced team" (we don't train), and "casual work atmosphere" (we don't pay enough for you to dress up). It suggests these phrases are used to disguise less desirable job aspects like low pay, lack of training or support, long hours, and unrealistic expectations.

1. Corporate lingo for dummies
Read on…

2. 
You have heard them number of times
and perhaps used them also but,
corporate buzzwords seem to have a
new meaning everytime...

3. 'COMPETITIVE SALARY'
We remain competitive by paying less
than our competitors

4. 'JOIN OUR FAST-PACED TEAM'
We have no time to train you

5. 'CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE'
We don't pay enough to expect that
you'll dress up; well, a couple of the real
daring guys wear earrings

6. 'MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED'
You'll be six months behind schedule
on your first day

7. 'SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED'
Some time each night & some time
each weekend

8. 'DUTIES WILL VARY'
Anyone in the office can boss you
around

9. 'MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL'
We have no quality control

10. 'CAREER-MINDED'
Female applicants must be childless
(and remain that way)

11. 'APPLY IN PERSON'
If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the
position has been filled

12. 'NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE'
We've filled the job; our call for resumes
is just a legal formality

13. 'SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A
WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE'
You'll need it to replace three people
who just left

14. 'PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A
MUST'
You're walking into a company in
perpetual chaos

15. 'REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP
SKILLS'
You'll have the responsibilities of a
manager, without the pay or respect

16. 'GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS'
Management communicates, you listen,
figure out what they want and do it