The Song of Songs Chapter 5: Love and Sexuality in Marriage

CHAPTER 5 THE SONG OF SONGS
Written and edited by Glenn Pease
1 I have come into my garden, my sister, my
bride; I have gathered my myrrh with my spice. I
have eaten my honeycomb and my honey; I have
drunk my wine and my milk. Eat, O friends, and
drink; drink your fill, O lovers.
1. Expositor's Bible, "WE have seen how this strange poem mingles fact
and fancy, memory and reverie, in what would
be hopeless confusion if we could not detect a common
prevailing sentiment and one aim towards which the
whole is tending, with all its rapidly shifting scenes and
all its perplexingly varying movements. The middle
of the poem attains a perfect climax of love and rapture.
Then we are suddenly transported to an entirely differ
ent scene. The Shulammite recites a second dream,
which somewhat resembles her former dream, but is
more vivid and intense, and ends very painfully. The
circumstances of it will agree most readily with the
idea that she is already married to the shepherd.
Again it is a dream of the loss of her lover, and of her
search for him by night in the streets of Jerusalem.
But in the present case he was first close to her, and
then he deserted her most unaccountably ; and when
she went to look for him this time she failed to
find him, and met with cruel ill-treatment. In her
dream she fancies she hears the bridegroom knocking
at her chamber door and calling upon her as his sister,
his love, his dove, his undefiled, to open to him. He
has just returned from tending his flock in the night,

and his hair is wet with the dew."
1B. The strong sexual content here bothers many, but what this song is saying is that
the sexual delights we enjoy are approved by God. There is no immoral sex when
enjoyed by partners that God approves. Whatever is acceptable to them is
acceptable to God. He has put no restrictions on what can be enjoyed between them
alone in the privacy of their lovemaking. Oral sex becomes a major issue here. Many
Christians feel it is wrong. My first encounter with it in counseling was by a wife
who enjoyed it but felt guilty because she did. Most counselors would advise any
couple that if something is mutually enjoyable then it is something they should
thank God for, and rejoice in their love. If it is objectionable to one partner it
should not be forced upon them, nor any other sexual practice that is painful or not
enjoyable. Sex is to be mutual pleasure, and if it is not then it is an abuse of sex.
What may not be acceptable at the moment may be later, for couples grow in their
desire to explore more ways to enjoy each other. New methods of giving each other
pleasure will develop as a couple grows in their desire to keep the fires of passion
alive and burning. If they never try new things there is a danger of losing that
passion. Enjoying each other sexually should be a passion for all of life, and
continue into old age.
2. "Eat . . . O lovers." The metaphors used express the fully satisfying nature of his
sexual experience (cf. 2 Sam.13:15). "Biblically, when a lover gives himself to his
beloved as these two have done, the relationship of each has changed to all the rest
of the human race. That is why traditionally in our culture a wedding cannot be
performed without witnesses. That is the reason behind the publishing of wedding
bans. The taking of a woman by a man is a public matter. "Furthermore, what one
does with one's sexuality is of concern to God (Exod 20:14). Likewise, it is a concern
to everyone else. The woman now belongs to the man and the man to the woman.
This changes all other personal relationships. Thus the witnesses present at
weddings represent the larger society. This is why weddings are considered legal
matters. "Self-giving love between the sexes is of social significance. Society must
know. How else can marriage be a witness and testimony to the relationship of
Christ and the church? One Savior, one spouse!" And obviously Solomon cannot be
the example of one Savior, one spouse. The only one who can be this example is the
shepherd lover.
2B. One commentator expresses how intense the passion is in this verse. "The Loved
One has entered his garden and taken what it offers to him. Images of scent
("myrrh" and "spice", referring again to the Dear One's vulva) and of taste
("honeycomb" and "honey", "wine" and "milk") describe (it seems) the sensations
and secretions of intercourse itself, including the climax and ejaculation of the
Loved One. What an experience! The Loved One's joy can hardly be
contained...and then calms of itself. After the Lovers rest, they make love again...and
again, until they are satiated: "Eat, O friends; drink and imbibe deeply (or be

drunken), O lovers!" Far from being prudish about sex (even if delicate in its
descriptions of it), the Song encourages its full expression in marriage (and
especially during the honeymoon)."
2C. The wife of a well known evangelical leader spoke to a women’s group and said,
“You know girls, a prostitute is skilled in all the techniques of giving sexual pleasure
to a man she does not even know or love. If they can do that for a man they do not
even know or love, just for money, surely we should be even more skilled in giving
sexual pleasure to our husbands whom we do love.”
3. Clarke, "Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits. I have
come into my garden, my sister, callah, or spouse; I have gathered my myrrh," &c. I
have taken thee for my spouse, and am perfectly satisfied that thou art pure and
immaculate. Eat, O friends-drink abundantly - These are generally supposed to be
the words of the bridegroom, after he returned from the nuptial chamber, and
exhibited those signs of his wife's purity which the customs of those times required.
This being a cause of universal joy, the entertainment is served up; and he invites
his companions, and the friends of both parties, to eat and drink abundantly, as
there was such a universal cause of rejoicing. Others think that these are the words
of the bride to her spouse: but the original will not bear this meaning; the verbs are
all plural."
4. Patsy Rae Dawson wrote, "God, who inspired the recording of this true story,
puts his stamp of approval on the proposal of the Shepherd rather than the
sensuous proposal of Solomon. Since the Shulammite and the Shepherd have built
their relationship on a firm foundation of true love and emotional involvement, God
tells them to drink and become drunk on married love. In a marriage built on
mutual respect for each other's role in life and inherent abilities, blessings abound
from God. God created marriage and the marriage bed along with the sexual desires
of a husband and a wife. He cares about who a person marries, just as he cared
about who the Shulammite married. The Song of Solomon teaches how to pick the
right marriage partner and how to build a foundation of true love. Wanting his
people to be happy, God tells the Shulammite and the Shepherd, “Get married and
get drunk on married love!”
4B. "The NIV margin attributes the last part of the verse, Eat, O friends, and drink;
drink your fill, O lovers,to the “friends” of the couple. However, it is unlikely that
friends, wedding guests, or any other persons would have been present in the
bedroom at the consummation of the couple’s marriage. A more plausible
suggestion is that the speaker was God Himself. Only their Creator would have been
a “guest” on that occasion. Since their love was from Him it was fitting that He
approve it. He invited them to enjoy sexual love in marriage as if it were a banquet
(“eat... and drink”). This clearly indicates God’s approval of marriage, which He
designed in the Garden of Eden." Author unknown

5. The greater the sexuality of this song, the more it proves that the song is all about
pure love rather than the excessive sexual escapades of king Solomon. He has wives
galore, and sex partners in dozens of rooms in his palace. There is no beautiful love
story that comes from that atmosphere, but there is with the one man and one
woman story of the shepherd and his lover. It is the ideal relationship. Someone said
that one mate is monogamy, and two is bigamy, and so what is the number that
Solomon had? That is pigamy. His lustful life is not out example, but that of the
faithful young man and woman are. Solomon was not wrong to find this lovely
young thing very attractive and appealing, but like every man who is stimulated by
the beuty of another woman, he should have satisfied his needs with one of his many
beautiful wives. David was not wrong to find Bathsheba beautiful and enticing, but
he too should have gone to one of his many wives to meet his need. Men cannot help
be being stimulated by sexual beauty anymore than they can stop their mouth from
watering when they smell popcorn, but they don't go and try to take other people's
popcorn. They go and get their own, and that is how men are to deal with all sexual
stimulus. They are to go and use the energy stimulated to enjoy lovemaking with
their own wives. The sources of sexual arousal are many, but the satisfaction of it is
to be the one to whom you are committed exclusively as a sex partner, and that is the
whole point of Paul in I Cor. 7:1-7. Solomon could not, or would not, follow this
pattern, and so it is folly to take a man like him and make him the hero of this song,
for in doing so you glorify lust and polygamy as God's ideal. Some try to get around
this by suggesting that Solomon was not having sex with any of his many wives and
concubines. If you buy that you are among the most rare specimens of gullibility
who actually believe that anything in print has to be true.
6. Spurgeon adds his spiritual perspective: “The heart of the believer is Christ's
garden. He bought it with His precious blood, and He enters it and claims it as His
own. A garden implies separation. It is not the open common; it is not a wilderness;
it is walled around, or hedged in. Would that we could see the wall of separation
between the church and the world made broader and stronger. It makes one sad to
hear Christians saying, "Well, there is no harm in this; there is no harm in that,"
thus getting as near to the world as possible. Grace is at a low ebb in that soul which
can even raise the question of how far it may go in worldly conformity. A garden is
a place of beauty, it far surpasses the wild uncultivated lands. The genuine Christian
must seek to be more excellent in his life than the best moralist, because Christ's
garden ought to produce the best flowers in all the world. Even the best is poor
compared with Christ's deservings; let us not put Him off with withering and dwarf
plants. The rarest, richest, choicest lilies and roses ought to bloom in the place which
Jesus calls His own. The garden is a place of growth. The saints are not to remain
undeveloped, always mere buds and blossoms. We should grow in grace, and in the
knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. Growth should be rapid where
Jesus is the Husbandman, and the Holy Spirit the dew from above. A garden is a
place of retirement. So the Lord Jesus Christ would have us reserve our souls as a
place in which He can manifest Himself, as He doth not unto the world. O that

Christians were more retired, that they kept their hearts more closely shut up for
Christ! We often worry and trouble ourselves, like Martha, with much serving, so
that we have not the room for Christ that Mary had, and do not sit at His feet as we
should. The Lord grant the sweet showers of His grace to water His garden this
day."
2 I slept but my heart was awake. Listen! My
lover is knocking: "Open to me, my sister, my
darling, my dove, my flawless one. My head is
drenched with dew, my hair with the dampness of
the night."
1. Here is a strange dream she is having. Have you ever had a dream that did not
make sense? It appears that the male lover is approaching her in the middle of the
night when she is sleeping, and what I have read about this is that it does not work
very well. Women are not usually in the mood for loving after they have gone to
sleep. Men are often not aware of the fact that women are not as easily aroused as
they are, and it takes some preparation. Instant sex is male sex. Those who insist on
this kind of sex will have some experience similar to what Jay Leno talked about. He
said that some study showed that 26 % of women will answer the phone if it rings
while making love. He said what should really worry a man is if she is making out
going calls. Dillow points to I Pet. 3:7 and says live with is consistently translated in
LXX as “have sexual intercourse with.” See Gen. 20:3, Deut. 22:13, 24:1, Isa. 62:5
He paraphrases it, “You husbands likewise, have sexual intercourse with your wife
in a way that is based upon insight gathered from personal investigation of her
needs.” This is sex as is should be." This shepherd lover is making a wrong
approach in her dream, but maybe he is wiser in real life.
2. It is obvious that she is dreaming about her shepherd lover, for Solomon would
not be out in the night getting all wet with dew when he lived in the palace where
she was at. He is coming from the outside world and is seeking entrance. An
unknown commentator puts it all together like this:
"5:2 Again the woman dreamed (cf. 3:1-4). In her dream her husband came to
her having been out of doors in the evening. His mind appears to have
been on making love in view of what follows.
5:3-4 However she had lost interest. She gave a weak excuse: she had already
gotten ready for bed (and may have had a headache). When he tried to
open her door but found it locked, he gave up and went away. It was not
long before she knew she had erred in discouraging him.

5:5-7 She went to the door and found that he had been ready to make love (v. 5;
cf. Prov. 7:17; Song of Sol. 4:6, 5:13). She opened it but discovered he
had gone. The fact that in her dream the watchmen beat her may indicate
that she subconsciously felt that someone should punish her for refusing
him.
5:8 She told her friends to tell her husband if they saw him that she wanted his
love again (cf. 2:5-6).
"'Lovesick' here seems to describe frustration from sexual abstinence rather than
exhaustion from sexual activity."
3. Ron Wallace see this from a different angle:"The curtain opens and once again
we are in the living quarters of the daughters of Jerusalem. The Shulamite woman is
still occupied with her love for the shepherd and begins to relate an incident when
he came to visit her late at night at her home in the country. She is presently absent
from the shepherd and longs for his presence. She thus recalls another time when
she wanted to be with him and he with her, but because of miscommunication, they
did not meet and instead, she was found wandering in the city and was beaten by
the guards, who assumed she was a harlot."
4. Scot McKnight gives us his quick summery of how he sees it: "The narrative of
Song of Songs 5:2–6:3 surprises. The woman is in bed, her lover knocks at the door,
she delays, he departs, she searches, she enlists the women of Jerusalem to tell him if
they find him that she loves him, they ask where he is and she surprises us: “He’s
right here. Tending his garden (me).” He adds his understanding of what is being
taught here as he writes, "Perhaps one thing we learn is that love has its union and
its separation, its delights and its downers, its moments of fear and its moments of
courage. It is both satisfaction of desire and frustration about distance.......The ups
and downs, the ins and outs, the intimacies and separations are part of the process
of knowing one another, loving one another, and learning the fine art of love in the
key of delight.
5. McKnight goes on, "Is this the age-old story that “if you love me, you’ll do what I
say?” That is, the story of an impatient young man? Or is this the delicacy of a
woman who doesn’t quite know how to respond properly and, because of her
unsurety, makes a mistake and regrets her mistake? In light of what follows in the
text, I tend to think the second view is more accurate, but no one one knows for
sure. Sometimes we regret our delays; sometimes our delays were wise because we
weren’t sure. There are no certainties in relationships — there are trusts, risks,
adventures, delights, and disappointments. We make decisions and live with their
impacts. I think what I like most about the woman’s delay and disappointment is
her search for her lover. Maybe the search shows she regrets her delay; if so, she
searches for him and pursues him and then finds him. She thinks, perhaps, that
she’s made a mistake — and she seeks to undo it."

6. David Holder, "Love's obstacles and problems (5:2-8) This section may be a
dream sequence as 3:1-5, yet it nevertheless reflects what could be real
circumstances and reactions. We are faulty and fragile creatures, and interpersonal
relationship are sometimes difficult. The man approaches his wife, she is initially
indifferent toward him and slow to respond, and he leaves for the moment. But no
sooner do the words come out of her mouth than she regrets having said them. She
feels remorse and her vision of the watchmen's and gaurdsmen's treatment of her
may reflect her guilt. She "beats up on herself" for the way she reacted. She wants
the opportunity to be with her husband again. "The Song is unabashedly erotic. Yet
it is never satisfied to be content with the physical alone. A normal person finds the
erotic ultimately meaningful only if there is trust and commitment, delight in the
other's person as well as in the body" (Kinlaw, p. 1234).
7. As You Sleep by Scarlet MethosLove
As you sleep the sound of your breathing calms me,
Knowing that you are safe and secure in your bed.
Only wishing my arms were around you holding you close and
comforting you from the day to day stress that has exhausted you so.
Loving you so much and wanting you so badly.
As I listen to your soft sensual breathing my mind wanders and my body
aches for your touch, to feel your lips on mine and our bodies entangled in a
passionate fiery embrace.
You occasionally awaken just enough to whisper my name and say I love you.
Whether it be conscious or unconsciously my heart races as the words drift across
your lips.
Listening to you not wanting to let go of the moment but sometimes awakening you
saying that I love you and I miss you hoping that you understand hoping that you
hear me in the back of your mind.
So you may feel my love for you in your heart and soul and know how much I care.
For when you sleep I watch over you and my love goes with you and protects your
hopes and dreams always...
8. An unknown author gives us his brilliant insight on this text. " In the
dream sequence, she refused his advances (5:2-5) and he
turned and went away for a while (5:6). He would not
force love, but he did not give up on it either. He
probably felt confused and his pride may have been

wounded. If so, these would be natural feelings. But it
wasn't long before he was back and when he returned he
had adoring words to say to her (6:4-10). Now here is a
great lesson for us to learn. He could have returned
with his own analysis of the situation and accusations
against her, having decided what all this meant and what
it was related to in the past. He could have taken this
opportunity to unload on her. It seems that our minds
quickly run to the worst and we draw incorrect conclu-sions
about another person's intentions. We are so sure
we have the situation sized up correctly, and often we
give it the worst possible connotation. Instead, our
rule of thumb should be to look for the good, remember
our love, and refuse to focus on the bad, where 'focus'
is a key word. It is not news to anyone who's married
that men and women think differently. And surely we all
know that we are often uncertain about another person's
thoughts and feelings. Since this is true, we must
decide to give each other the benefit of the doubt, look
for the good, and refuse to get focused on the bad.
3. Remember and renew love. Perhaps this is the most
impressive feature of this man and woman dealing with
their problems. They did not forget that they are on the
same team, that there was something that drew them to
each other, that they loved each other deeply. Probably
more than any one other factor, this will go the farthest
toward resolving difficulties in marriage."
9. Spurgeon wrote from the spiritual perspective. “Paradoxes abound in Christian
experience, and here is one--the spouse was asleep, and yet she was awake. He only
can read the believer's riddle who has ploughed with the heifer of his experience.
The two points in this evening's text are--a mournful sleepiness and a hopeful
wakefulness. I sleep. Through sin that dwelleth in us we may become lax in holy
duties, slothful in religious exercises, dull in spiritual joys, and altogether supine
and careless. This is a shameful state for one in whom the quickening Spirit dwells;
and it is dangerous to the highest degree. Even wise virgins sometimes slumber, but

it is high time for all to shake off the bands of sloth. It is to be feared that many
believers lose their strength as Samson lost his locks, while sleeping on the lap of
carnal security. With a perishing world around us, to sleep is cruel; with eternity so
near at hand, it is madness. Yet we are none of us so much awake as we should be; a
few thunder-claps would do us all good, and it may be, unless we soon bestir
ourselves, we shall have them in the form of war, or pestilence, or personal
bereavements and losses. O that we may leave for ever the couch of fleshly ease, and
go forth with flaming torches to meet the coming Bridegroom! My heart waketh.
This is a happy sign. Life is not extinct, though sadly smothered. When our renewed
heart struggles against our natural heaviness, we should be grateful to sovereign
grace for keeping a little vitality within the body of this death. Jesus will hear our
hearts, will help our hearts, will visit our hearts; for the voice of the wakeful heart is
really the voice of our Beloved, saying, "Open to me." Holy zeal will surely unbar
the door.
"Oh lovely attitude! He stands
With melting heart and laden hands;
My soul forsakes her every sin;
And lets the heavenly stranger in."
3 I have taken off my robe-- must I put it on
again? I have washed my feet-- must I soil them
again?
1. This sound like the weak arguments that women come up with for not being
ready for sex. They have many, and this is an old one, but it sounds lame to a lover.
What about, it will wake the kids, it is too late, it is too cold, or hot, or my head
aches, or my back, or I am too full, or too tired, or just not in the mood, or their is
company in the next room. To a man everything is a weak excuse, for none of these
things would hinder him. Some studies show that many women after 20 years of
marriage no longer have orgasms. It is because of a lack of security. They are losing
their family of children and feel insecure. Only when they feel secure can they let go.
But they do not want to let go when it seems they will lose something. Security is an
important part of sex. This is a minor issue here, but she did not want to lose the
labor of all she went through to get ready for bed, and so she rejects the advances of
her lover. She is cool, and he is hot, and in more than one way, for when he could
not get her to let him in he kicked the door and went off in a bad mood. What about
persistence? She came when she thought about it, but he gave up too soon. Both of
them display faults in their relationship, for she was too complacent, and maybe
even lazy, and he was way too impatient. Love relationships do not guarantee that

the sinful nature will disappear. Mates need to fight their flaws constantly. She was
worried about getting her feet dirty again, and so she refused to budge from the bed,
but before the night was over she would be dirtied, beaten and humiliated because
she was unmotivated to answer the door.
2. Mates need to learn that total availability is the key to prevent sex outside of
marriage. Frustration in marriage can lead to obsession with sex outside the
marriage bond. If a mate is not up to sex on occasions, that can be tolerated, but if it
is very frequent it is bad news. A mate needs to satisfy the partner sometimes in a
quick fix type sex to relieve the tension. It is not romantic, but just mechanical sex,
and may just be manipulation with the hand, but it satisfies a need for a brief time
with little energy. Studies would indicate that it will usually be the women who has
to mechanically meet this need in the man. Dr. Miles did a study of Christian
couples and found that men needed an orgasm ever 2:7 days, and women every 3:2
days. This means a man needs an extra every once in a while. One women missed
this study, for she said, “My husband is so over sexual that he would insist in
making love to me twice a month if I’d let him.”
3. Rabbi Adin Stensaltz sees a spiritual application: "The dramatic description of
the lover knocking on the door seeking entrance, while the beloved is not yet ready
to receive him, idly hesitant about getting up and opening the door, is the classic
description of the relation between Knesset Yisrael, the soul in particular, and the
Shekhinah in general, to the call from on high. The lazy heart, the inner reluctance
to total commitment, even to any alteration of the comfortable existing situation, are
common to both the people and the individual. This great opportunity that comes to
nation and to person occasionally is often missed. And afterward, the belated
awakening of consciousness to wonder of what was being offered urges one to run
after and catch the missed opportunity, in spite of the difficult, the dark night, and
the cruel watchers of the wall. All of this is an intrinsic part of the chronicles of
Israel, just as they are intrinsic to the life of any human soul. They are universal
depictions of the experience of the almost attained spiritual solution.
4. She sounds like a woman married for some time already. Professor H. W. Jurgen,
a West German sociologist, claims that couples chat with each other for seventy
minutes a day in their first year of marriage, dropping to thirty minutes a day in
their second year and then to only fifteen minutes in the fourth. His research shows
that by the eighth year a husband and wife share hardly any small talk and become
nearly silent with each other. This can happen at any stage of a relationship on
certain days, and this appears to be what is happening here. She was not in the
mood for talking, or anything else.
5. Her unwillingness to get a little dirt on her feet to enjoy the love of this man at her
door makes me think of the woman in this poem by Ella Wheeler Wilcox.

If all the year was summer time,
And all the aim of life
Was just to lilt on like a rhyme,
Then I would be your wife.
If all the days were August days,
And crowned with golden weather,
How happy then through green-clad ways
We two could stray together!
If all the nights were moonlit nights,
And we had naught to do
But just to sit and plan delights,
Then I would wed with you.
If life was all a summer fete,
Its soberest pace the "glide,"
Then I would choose you for my mate,
And keep you at my side.
But winter makes full half the year,
And labor half of life,
And all the laughter and good cheer
Give place to wearing strife.
Days will grow cold, and moons wax old.
And then a heart that's true
Is better far than grace or gold—
And so, my love, adieu!
I cannot wed with you.
6. Some of the enthusiasm seems to have gone out of this woman in bed, and it
happens in all marriages that there are times of loss of passion. It is then that they
need to begin again where they started, and rekindle that love that broght them
together in the first place. Bass Mitchell quotes a song that speaks to this very issue,
and I quote him from his Valentine Day sermon, "Speaking of songs, there's one by
Jim Murray, a contemporary Christian singer, that sums up well what I hope for
each marriage relationship. It's entitled, "It's Like Beginning Again." I want to read
the words to you.
"Remember when we met, a time I'll never forget;
our love was young and new.

Two kids just starting out, too young to have any doubt,
our love would pay the bills and somehow see us through.
But somewhere in between just living each day,
doing things we had to do;
I loved you so, but didn't know,
how far I'd grown from you.
And it's like I'm beginning again,
rediscovering a long lost friend;
finding all those feelings, that somehow slipped away.
Chasing dreams that I hoped would come true,
I'd forgotten that they started with you.
You've always been my true love,
and now it's like beginning again.
Just like a spark that burns,
with care it slowly turns,
into a glowing flame.
So let's begin again,
with simple things we did then,
a smile, a gentle touch,
a love that will remain.
We'll make each moment the beginning of a memory
that's ours to share alone;
and even though, the years may show,
our love will not grow old.
And it's like I'm beginning again,
rediscovering a long lost friend;
finding all those feelings, that somehow slipped away.
Chasing dreams that I hoped would come true,
I'd forgotten that they started with you.
You've always been my true love,
and now it's like beginning again."
Or, as Robert Browning, the poet, said it, "Come, grow old with me; the best is yet
to be."

4 My lover thrust his hand through the latch-opening;
my heart began to pound for him.
msg, "But my lover wouldn't take no for an answer, and the longer he knocked, the
more excited I became."
1. She seems to be getting aroused by his aggression. Sometimes this is what a
woman needs to see in her lover-an aggressive approach. One translation has it, “I
trembled to the core of my being, my heart was stirred for him.” She had just told
him she was basically naked and not able to get to the door. When he acted as if he
was coming in anyway she was aroused, and her heart began to beat more rapidly.
1B. "Commentators offer a spectrum of opinions from Shulammith feeling
agitation, pity and compassion, sexual arousal, or a revival of her love for him. A
survey of the translations reveals the same lack of consensus: “my bowels were
moved for him” (KJV), “my bowels stirred within me” (NEB), “my heart yearned
for him” (AT), “my heart was thrilled within me” (RSV), “I trembled to the core of
my being” (JB), “my heart trembled within me” (NAB), “my heart was stirred for
him” (JPS, NJPS), “my feelings were aroused for him” (NASB), and “my heart
began to pound for him” (NIV). While the precise meaning may never be agreed
upon, whatever she was feeling roused herself from her indifferent apathetic
inactivity to arise and open for her beloved in 5:5."
2. This passage was used as a sex tool for the sake of nuns. St. Jerome encouraged
virgins to use this as a fantasy that would enable them to live without a man. He said
to them, “Ever let the Bridegroom fondle you.....He will put his hand through the
opening and will touch your body. And you will arise trembling and cry, I am
lovesick.” The nuns would masterbate and find satisfaction without a man. What
this reveals is that even those who see it as an allegory can also see it as an erotic
love song dealing with literal love making.
3. Ron Wallace, " my sister, my darling, my dove, my perfect one: These are terms
of affection to indicate the intimate relationship between the two. We must not think
that the use of the term sister here, means that it is Solomon again. The term is
common enough as an expression of strong affection, and the shepherd has the
reality of such a relationship with the Shulamite, while Solomon is presuming. (The
use of the term SISTER in a romantic context, is not unusual in this culture. In fact,
it communicates an aspect of intimacy -friendship and closeness- that would only be
experienced by a brother - or a lover.) The shepherd also uses the word darling
(rayAh), which means a very close friend. This word is only used in Song (9 times)
and one time at Judges 11:37, where it refers to the close female friends of
Jephthah's daughter. It is another common word of affection and once again,

communicates the intimate reality between the shepherd and the Shulamite. The
term, my dove, communicates affection in the context of the purity, cleanliness and
general gentleness of the dove. The term, my perfect one, expresses the speaker's
enthrallment with her physical beauty. He sees her as complete or "perfect" in
beauty. These terms are all very common and we should not seek to make an
identification of the speaker as being the same person when the terms are used.
Solomon has used them and will use them again, as at verse 6:9, but that does not
mean that Solomon and the shepherd are the same person."
4. Spurgeon offers this spiritual insight: “Knocking was not enough, for my heart
was too full of sleep, too cold and ungrateful to arise and open the door, but the
touch of His effectual grace has made my soul bestir itself. Oh, the longsuffering of
my Beloved, to tarry when He found Himself shut out, and me asleep upon the bed
of sloth! Oh, the greatness of His patience, to knock and knock again, and to add
His voice to His knockings, beseeching me to open to Him! How could I have refused
Him! Base heart, blush and be confounded! But what greatest kindness of all is this,
that He becomes His own porter and unbars the door Himself. Thrice blessed is the
hand which condescends to lift the latch and turn the key. Now I see that nothing
but my Lord's own power can save such a naughty mass of wickedness as I am;
ordinances fail, even the gospel has no effect upon me, till His hand is stretched out.
Now, also, I perceive that His hand is good where all else is unsuccessful, He can
open when nothing else will. Blessed be His name, I feel His gracious presence even
now. Well may my bowels move for Him, when I think of all that He has suffered
for me, and of my ungenerous return. I have allowed my affections to wander. I
have set up rivals. I have grieved Him. Sweetest and dearest of all beloveds, I have
treated Thee as an unfaithful wife treats her husband. Oh, my cruel sins, my cruel
self. What can I do? Tears are a poor show of my repentance, my whole heart boils
with indignation at myself. Wretch that I am, to treat my Lord, my All in All, my
exceeding great joy, as though He were a stranger. Jesus, thou forgivest freely, but
this is not enough, prevent my unfaithfulness in the future. Kiss away these tears,
and then purge my heart and bind it with sevenfold cords to Thyself, never to
wander more.
5 I arose to open for my lover, and my hands
dripped with myrrh, my fingers with flowing
myrrh, on the handles of the lock.
1. On her way to the door she apparently got herself ready for love making for she
covered herself with perfume. The nose is an important part of romance. It was
romantic to cover the handles for he would then by touching them also have the
wonderful odor on him. Pleasant odor creates desire.
2. Odor enters into the spiritual picture as well.

1 JESUS, the very thought of thee
With sweetness fills my breast;
But sweeter far thy face to see,
And in thy presence rest.
2 Nor voice can sing, nor heart can frame,
Nor can the memory find
A sweeter sound than thy blest name,
O Saviour of mankind!
3 O hope of every contrite heart,
O joy of all the meek,
To those who fall how kind thou art!
How good to those who seek!
4 But what to those who find? Ah! this
Nor tongue nor pen can show;The love of Jesus, what it is
None but his loved ones know.
5 Jesus, our only joy be thou,
As thou our prize wilt be;
Jesu, be thou our glory now,
And through eternity.
6 I opened for my lover, but my lover had left; he
was gone. My heart sank at his departure. I
looked for him but did not find him. I called him
but he did not answer.
1. She took so much time getting ready that he decided it was hopeless and so he
took off. She heard the knock of opportunity, but failed to cease the day and grab
that opportunity. Sometimes we need to act quickly when we feel the powerful pull
of sexual urges. Delay can lead to a cool down that is just as rapid as the worm up,
and the opportunity to share a passionate experience fades. She felt bad that she had
taken too much time, and leaving him discouraged. She looked around and called
for him, but he was long gone.
2. Spurgeon, “Prayer sometimes tarrieth, like a petitioner at the gate, until the King
cometh forth to fill her bosom with the blessings which she seeketh. The Lord, when
He hath given great faith, has been known to try it by long delayings. He has
suffered His servants' voices to echo in their ears as from a brazen sky. They have
knocked at the golden gate, but it has remained immovable, as though it were rusted

upon its hinges. Like Jeremiah, they have cried, "Thou hast covered Thyself with a
cloud, that our prayer should not pass through." Thus have true saints continued
long in patient waiting without reply, not because their prayers were not vehement,
nor because they were unaccepted, but because it so pleased Him who is a
Sovereign, and who gives according to His own pleasure. If it pleases Him to bid our
patience exercise itself, shall He not do as He wills with His own! Beggars must not
be choosers either as to time, place, or form. But we must be careful not to take
delays in prayer for denials: God's long-dated bills will be punctually honoured; we
must not suffer Satan to shake our confidence in the God of truth by pointing to our
unanswered prayers. Unanswered petitions are not unheard. God keeps a file for
our prayers--they are not blown away by the wind, they are treasured in the King's
archives. This is a registry in the court of heaven wherein every prayer is recorded.
Tried believer, thy Lord hath a tear-bottle in which the costly drops of sacred grief
are put away, and a book in which thy holy groanings are numbered. By-and-by,
thy suit shall prevail. Canst thou not be content to wait a little? Will not thy Lord's
time be better than thy time? By-and-by He will comfortably appear, to thy soul's
joy, and make thee put away the sackcloth and ashes of long waiting, and put on the
scarlet and fine linen of full fruition.
7 The watchmen found me as they made their
rounds in the city. They beat me, they bruised me;
they took away my cloak, those watchmen of the
walls!
1. Some see this as her dream or fantasy that grows out of her guilt for rejecting her
lover. She feels like she deserves a good beating for this behavior. Here is police
brutality, but nothing can be too strange for a dream. It could be a sex dream, for
she is left naked by them, and she says next that she is love sick, and so highly
aroused and not satisfied because she turned her lover away.
2. Ron Wallace, "While she was out looking for him in the early night hours, she
was found by the watchmen of the city. Apparently she was mistaken for a harlot,
for there is no other explanation for the abuse they heaped upon her. Her shawl was
probably used partly for warmth and partly for a veil, but the guards would see that
as a ruse and thinking she was a harlot, would take the shawl away. After being
bullied and beaten she was released to wander to her home on her own efforts."
3. "With urgent desperation, I sought my absent lover. I sought but did not find
him. The stolid watchmen of the night, the city walls patrolling, they took me for a
wandering girl of doubtful reputation. They beat me, stripped me of my outer dress
and left me crying in distress. The composer of this song describes sexual longing.
He knows about erotic dreams, meddling relatives and the struggle to

pursuerelationship in a world beyond Eden. Love can easily turn to lust, the beloved
can dream of love-making and equally of rape, (5:7."
8 O daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you-- if you
find my lover, what will you tell him? Tell him I
am faint with love.
1. She is ready now and no one there to meet her need. She blew it and now needs
the help of others to get the message to her lover that she is offering him a second
chance. She is ready for him now and will not make any lame excuses to turn him
away. Tell him, if you find him, that I need the medicine that only he can supply, for
I am love sick and need a huge dose of his love to make me well.
2. Wherever he is, she wants him to know that he is hers and she is his. She does not
want him going off hungry for love and finding another to satisfy his need. She
wants him to come back knowing he belongs to her just as the old song says.
You Belong To Me by The Duprees
See the pyramids along the Nile
Watch the sun rise on a tropic isle
Just remember darling all the while
You belong to me
See the marketplace in old Algiers
Send me photographs and souvenirs
But remember when a dream appears
You belong to me
I'll be so alone without you
Maybe you'll be lonesome too and blue
Fly the ocean in a silver plane
Watch the jungle when it's wet with rain
Just remember till you're home again
You belong to me

3. Spurgeon, “Such is the language of the believer panting after present fellowship
with Jesus, he is sick for his Lord. Gracious souls are never perfectly at ease except
they are in a state of nearness to Christ; for when they are away from Him they lose
their peace. The nearer to Him, the nearer to the perfect calm of heaven; the nearer
to Him, the fuller the heart is, not only of peace, but of life, and vigour, and joy, for
these all depend on constant intercourse with Jesus. What the sun is to the day, what
the moon is to the night, what the dew is to the flower, such is Jesus Christ to us.
What bread is to the hungry, clothing to the naked, the shadow of a great rock to
the traveller in a weary land, such is Jesus Christ to us; and, therefore, if we are not
consciously one with Him, little marvel if our spirit cries in the words of the Song, "I
charge you, O ye daughters of Jerusalem, if ye find my beloved, tell Him that I am
sick of love." This earnest longing after Jesus has a blessing attending it: "Blessed are
they that do hunger and thirst after righteousness"; and therefore, supremely
blessed are they who thirst after the Righteous One. Blessed is that hunger, since it
comes from God: if I may not have the full-blown blessedness of being filled, I
would seek the same blessedness in its sweet bud-pining in emptiness and eagerness
till I am filled with Christ. If I may not feed on Jesus, it shall be next door to heaven
to hunger and thirst after Him. There is a hallowedness about that hunger, since it
sparkles among the beatitudes of our Lord. But the blessing involves a promise. Such
hungry ones "shall be filled" with what they are desiring. If Christ thus causes us to
long after Himself, He will certainly satisfy those longings; and when He does come
to us, as come He will, oh, how sweet it will be!
9 How is your beloved better than others, most
beautiful of women? How is your beloved better
than others, that you charge us so?
1. What makes you think your lover is better than others? What is so special about
him?
2222.... Judith Viorst in Redbook answered the question, What is the difference between
infatuation and love? She wrote, “Infatuation is when you think that he’s as sexy as
Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger, as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as
Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Connors. Love is when you realize he’s as
sexy as Woody Allen, as smart as Jimmy Connors, as funny as Ralph Nader, as
athletic as Henry Kissinger, and nothing like Robert Redford, but you’ll take him
anyway.”
3. Ron Wallace may be reading more in than is here, but it sounds good anyway.

"Upon hearing this, they inquire as to his appearance so that they might recognize
him. This is further evidence that Solomon is NOT the man in view. She is speaking
about someone whom the daughters do not know. If it were Solomon, they would
not be asking for a description." Ron McKnight agrees and wrote, "In essence,
“What’s so special about him that gives us a clue on how to identify him?”
10 My lover is radiant and ruddy, outstanding
among ten thousand.
msg, 10-16 I have kept this section of the Message together to give the full impact of
her description of her lover. " My dear lover glows with health—red-blooded,
radiant! He's one in a million.
There's no one quite like him!
My golden one, pure and untarnished,
with raven black curls tumbling across his shoulders.
His eyes are like doves, soft and bright,
but deep-set, brimming with meaning, like wells of water.
His face is rugged, his beard smells like sage,
His voice, his words, warm and reassuring.
Fine muscles ripple beneath his skin,
quiet and beautiful.
His torso is the work of a sculptor,
hard and smooth as ivory.
He stands tall, like a cedar,
strong and deep-rooted,
A rugged mountain of a man,
aromatic with wood and stone.
His words are kisses, his kisses words.
Everything about him delights me, thrills me
through and through!

That's my lover, that's my man,
dear Jerusalem sisters.
1. He is one in ten thousand. Today we would upgrade that to one in a million. She
goes on to tell of what she loves about her lover, and this reveals that woman can be
very conscious of how the male body can be a turn on. Men are more visual, and
they are captured by the female body, but even though woman may not be as
strongly captured by the male body, they still have an attraction to it that increases
their love and desire.
1B. "..the idea is that he is the epitome of masculinity and virility. On the other
hand, the emphasis would be upon his health and virility, evidenced by his ruddy
complexion, or it could be a comparison between his ruddy coloring and the redness
of rubies (Lam. 4:7)." "The numeral “ten thousand” is the highest number used in
comparisons in Hebrew poetry (1 Sam. 18:7-8; 21:12; 29:5; Ps. 91:7). It is not used
to mark out a specific number, but to denote an indefinite number of persons of the
largest possible proportions (Gen 24:60; Num 10:36; Deut 33:2; Ps 3:7). Her point is
simply this: no other man could possibly compare."
2. To be in love is merely to be
In a state of perpetual anesthesia:
To mistake an ordinary young man for a Greek god
Or an ordinary young woman for a goddess.
~ by H.L. Mencken ~
3. Scot McKnight wrote, "Here’s what she likes — and these might not be what
women today like most about their lovers or what men like to be loved for, but they
are hers and it is her delights that concern us in this post. And what maybe will
surprise is how her delights are shaped by his physical body. There is nothing here
about how smart he is, or how much money he can bring home, or how much
reputation he brings to the family and to her, or how he makes her feel — instead,
she loves his body. The little rumor that ancient Jewish women kept to themselves,
kept quiet, and kept their feelings to themselves is blown out of the water by this
woman’s aesthetic but clearly erotic description of how she just is love-drunk over
her lover’s body. From head to legs, and then back to his speech, she scans her
man’s body. And she does so publicly — for the women of Jerusalem.
So effusive is this delight that one can not but understand why both rabbis and
Christians have been compelled to transfer this language into love language of God
and God’s people. But, herein lies a problem: if the language is so rich that it
borders on the idolatrous to love your lover so intensively, it is good to see that love
for one another is that sacred and that delightful and know that this is what love for

our lover is to be like."
4. Clarke, "My beloved is white and ruddy - Red and white, properly mixed, are
essential to a fine complexion; and this is what is intimated: he has the finest
complexion among ten thousand persons; not one in that number is equal to him.
Literally, "He bears the standard among ten thousand men;" or "He is one before
whom a standard is borne," i.e., he is captain or chief of the whole."
11 His head is purest gold; his hair is wavy and
black as a raven.
1. He has a lovely head of hair, full of curls and dark black. He is the fabled ideal
man who is tall, dark and handsome.
2. "His head the finest gold;
With secret sweet perfume,
His curled locks hang all as black
As any raven's plume."
2B. One commentator wrote, "He has the most beautiful head, fine and majestic.
Gold is here used to express excellence.The NASB has, "His head is like gold, pure
gold” carrying over the Hebrew text which uses two terms for gold. The first is gold
in general but the second is gold that has be freed from all impurities,“pure gold.”
She starts at the top with the head (and hair). The NAC has, “His face is like gold
not only in that it is tanned but of the highest value to her”
3. Spurgeon applies this to Christ. “Comparisons all fail to set forth the Lord Jesus,
but the spouse uses the best within her reach. By the head of Jesus we may
understand His deity, "for the head of Christ is God" and then the ingot of purest
gold is the best conceivable metaphor, but all too poor to describe one so precious,
so pure, so dear, so glorious. Jesus is not a grain of gold, but a vast globe of it, a
priceless mass of treasure such as earth and heaven cannot excel. The creatures are
mere iron and clay, they all shall perish like wood, hay, and stubble, but the
everliving Head of the creation of God shall shine on for ever and ever. In Him is no
mixture, nor smallest taint of alloy. He is for ever infinitely holy and altogether
divine. The bushy locks depict His manly vigour. There is nothing effeminate in our
Beloved. He is the manliest of men. Bold as a lion, laborious as an ox, swift as an
eagle. Every conceivable and inconceivable beauty is to be found in Him, though
once He was despised and rejected of men.
The glory of His head is not shorn away, He is eternally crowned with peerless
majesty. The black hair indicates youthful freshness, for Jesus has the dew of His

youth upon Him. Others grow languid with age, but He is for ever a Priest as was
Melchisedek; others come and go, but He abides as God upon His throne, world
without end. We will behold Him to-night and adore Him. Angels are gazing upon
Him--His redeemed must not turn away their eyes from Him. Where else is there
such a Beloved? O for an hour's fellowship with Him! Away, ye intruding cares!
Jesus draws me, and I run after Him."
12 His eyes are like doves by the water streams,
washed in milk, mounted like jewels.
1. His eyes are also like doves, but his are wasked in milk, and the implication is that
they are such a brilliant white that the center of the eye is like a beautiful jewel
mounted on it. They catch a woman's eye like the hugh jewel catches her eye for
beauty. Men can be beautiful just as well as women, and they can eye catching
qualities just as women do.
13 His cheeks are like beds of spice yielding
perfume. His lips are like lilies dripping with
myrrh.
1. It can be a sure bet that this man does not have bad breath, for he smells like
perfume and is just dripping with sweet smalling myrrh.
2. Clarke, "His cheeks are as a bed of spices - Possibly meaning a bed in the garden,
where odouriferous herbs grew. But it has been supposed to refer to his beard,
which in a young well-made man is exceedingly beautiful. I have seen young Turks,
who had taken much care of their beards, mustachios, &c., look majestic. Scarcely
any thing serves to set off the human face to greater advantage than the beard, when
kept in proper order. Females admire it in their suitors and husbands. I have known
cases, where they not only despised but execrated Europeans, whose faces were close
shaved. The men perfume their beards often; and this may be what is intended by
spices and sweet-smelling myrrh."
3. Spurgeon, “Lo, the flowery month is come! March winds and April showers have
done their work, and the earth is all bedecked with beauty. Come my soul, put on
thine holiday attire and go forth to gather garlands of heavenly thoughts. Thou
knowest whither to betake thyself, for to thee "the beds of spices" are well known,
and thou hast so often smelt the perfume of "the sweet flowers," that thou wilt go at
once to thy well-beloved and find all loveliness, all joy in Him. That cheek once so
rudely smitten with a rod, oft bedewed with tears of sympathy and then defiled with

spittle--that cheek as it smiles with mercy is as fragrant aromatic to my heart. Thou
didst not hide Thy face from shame and spitting, O Lord Jesus, and therefore I will
find my dearest delight in praising Thee. Those cheeks were furrowed by the plough
of grief, and crimsoned with red lines of blood from Thy thorn-crowned temples;
such marks of love unbounded cannot but charm my soul far more than "pillars of
perfume." If I may not see the whole of His face I would behold His cheeks, for the
least glimpse of Him is exceedingly refreshing to my spiritual sense and yields a
variety of delights. In Jesus I find not only fragrance, but a bed of spices; not one
flower, but all manner of sweet flowers. He is to me my rose and my lily, my heart's-ease
and my cluster of camphire. When He is with me it is May all the year round,
and my soul goes forth to wash her happy face in the morning-dew of His grace, and
to solace herself with the singing of the birds of His promises. Precious Lord Jesus,
let me in very deed know the blessedness which dwells in abiding, unbroken
fellowship with Thee. I am a poor worthless one, whose cheek Thou hast deigned to
kiss! O let me kiss Thee in return with the kisses of my lips."
14 His arms are rods of gold set with chrysolite.
His body is like polished ivory decorated with
sapphires.
1. When a woman can see the male body as beautiful as expensive jewelry then we
know that women can be as visually stimulated as men are by the body.
2. Clarke, "His hands-gold rings set with the beryl - This really seems to refer to
gold rings set with precious stones on the fingers, and perhaps to circlets or
bracelets about the wrists. Some suppose it to refer to the roundness and exquisite
symmetry of the hand and fingers. vyvrt tarshish, which we translate beryl, a gem of
a sea-green tint, had better be translated chrysolite, which is of a gold colour.
His belly-bright ivory overlaid with sapphires. - This must refer to some garment set
with precious stones which went round his waist, and was peculiarly remarkable. If
we take it literally, the sense is plain enough. His belly was beautifully white, and
the blue veins appearing under the skin resembled the sapphire stone. But one can
hardly think that this was intended."
15 His legs are pillars of marble set on bases of
pure gold. His appearance is like Lebanon, choice
as its cedars.
1. The woman so often gets complimented for her beauty, but seldom do men get
complimented for their physical appearance concerning their body. This has been
shown to be a powerful image maker. When a wife compliments her husband in this

way it can change his whole attitude to life. It can help him at work, and in all that
he does, for it gives him a sense of self worth. It is one of the most rewarding things
a wife can do for their marriage. Most men feel insecure about their sexuality, and if
they hear their body praised they will feel like Tarzan, it will so boost their self
image. Tell a man he looks so sexy and that he is a great lover, and you will have a
passionate man.
2. His legs are as pillars of marble - Exquisitely turned and well-shaped; the sockets
of gold may refer to his slippers. On these a profusion of gold and ornaments are
still lavished in Asiatic countries. His countenance is as Lebanon - As Lebanon
exalts its head beyond all the other mountains near Jerusalem, so my beloved is tall
and majestic, and surpasses in stature and majesty all other men. He is also as
straight and as firm as the cedars.
16 His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether
lovely. This is my lover, this my friend, O
daughters of Jerusalem.
1. "In sharing a life together, you should develop a unity of interest and mutual
appreciation. This makes it possible to become best friends. Marital friendship
means we can bare our soul and share our innermost hopes, dreams, fears, pain and
joy. Do you know your mates greatest fear or disappointment? Their fondest
dream? The trust of mutual friendship means we can do this without fear of being
ignored, misunderstood or ridiculed. "A friend loves at all times" (Prov. 17:17).
Someone has said, "A friend is one who comes in when the rest of the world goes
out." You can count on a friend. Friends may have problems. Yet, you're not going
to get rid of a true friend."
2. Ella Wheeler Wilcox wrote a poem about the importance of friendship as the
foundation for love.
All love that has not friendship for its base
Is like a mansion built upon the sand.
Though brave its walls as any in the land,
And its tall turrets lift their heads in grace;
Though skilful and accomplished artists trace

Most beautiful designs on every hand,
And gleaming statues in dim niches stand,
And fountains play in some flow'r-hidden place:
Yet, when from the frowning east a sudden gust
Of adverse fate is blown, or sad rains fall,
Day in, day out, against its yielding wall,
Lo! the fair structure crumbles to the dust.
Love, to endure life's sorrow and earth's woe,
Needs friendship's solid mason-work below.
3. This is commonly thought to be a reference to Jesus who alone was altogether
lovely. He only was without flaw.
He is altogether lovely,
And the fairest of ten thousand,
This wonderful Friend divine;
He gave Himself to save me,
Now He lives in heav’n to keep me,
He is altogether lovely,
Is this wonderful Savior of mine. Wendell Loveless
4. Chris Tomlin has lyrics that many of us sang for years.
Light of the world,
You stepped down into darkness.

Opened my eyes,
let me see.
Beauty that made this heart adore you
Hope of a life spent with you
And here I am to worship,
here I am to bow down,
here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely,
altogether worthy,
altogether wonderful to me.
King of all days,
oh, so highly exalted.
Glorious in heaven above.
Humbly you came
to the earth you created
All for love's sake became poor.
And here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down

Here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely.
altogether worthy,
altogether wonderful to me.
I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost
And I'll never know how much it cost
No, I'll never know how much it cost
Here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful to me
5. The artist Larry Hampton has more lyrics about Jesus being altogether lovely.

Lord I love to feel Your presence
Resting tenderly
An intoxicating fragrance
I breathe You into me
You're beautiful
Altogether lovely
You're wonderful
Forever I will be
In love with You
Lord Your Spirit is the essence
Of life itself to me
And to be here in Your presence
Is all I'll ever need
To look into Your eyes of fire
To gaze upon Your face
Is everything my heart desires
As I come into this place.
6. These types of songs we can sing in church and never think of them in an erotic
context, but this song is full of the erotic, and it seems out of place to put Jesus in
this context of the erotic. That is why the song had to be spiritualized and the erotic
ignored, but it just does not work, for the erotic is here and nobody can deny it. This
sounded too sensual, and so it had to be spiritualized for centuries. To see it honestly
for what it is means that it is wonderful that God made the bodies of males and
females so attractive to each other that they get some of the greatest pleasures of life
by enjoy those bodies. Today many see it as the normal exaggeration of one who is

passionately in love with the body of her lover. This even sounds like oral sex to
some. Some love it and others think it terrible. Rom. 14:14 applies here, and every
one has to be persuaded in their own mind. There is no biblical hint that condemns
anything two people do together in love making that they both enjoy, and which
does not violate any statement that is made in Scripture.
7. Clarke, "His mouth is most sweet - His eloquence is great, and his voice is
charming. Every word he speaks is sweetness, mildness, and benevolence itself.
Then, her powers of description failing, and metaphor exhausted she cries out, "The
whole of him is loveliness. This is my beloved, and this is my companion, O ye
daughters of Jerusalem."
8. An unknown author wrote,"A female's adoration and admiration of her man can
help him be all that he can be, and history reveals this to be true.On a more
mundane level, romantic love can help lovers carry out their everyday tasks. An
impressive example comes from the letters of President Woodrow Wilson. Wilson's
first wife died in 1914. America was being sucked into the dark whirlwind of World
War I. German submarine warfare had begun in British shipping lanes. In 1915, the
Lusitania was sunk and 128 Americans died. At that time, in Winston Churchill's
estimation, President Wilson"played a part in the fate of nations incomparably
more direct and personal than any other man." And Wilson was falling in love.
During days filled with urgent briefings and nights of sleepless anxiety, Wilson
somehow found time to write Edith Gait and tell her he was "absolutely
dependent" on her love for the "right and free and most effective use of my
powers." With her, he experienced a "new confidence God's in his heaven and all's
right with the world. Duty looks simple and the tasks of the day pleasant and easy."
Romantic love, naturally, is better from the inside than the outside. Edith Galt's love
certainly lifted Wilson from the depression he suffered after his first wife's death,
and was his still point in a chaotically turning world."
9. These two lovers know every inch of each other, and love every inch. They are
lovers and friends, and have the desire that is expressed in the following song to
know each other more. This also applies to our knowledge of our Lord.
10. Brian Adams song “I Wanna Know You”
The biggest lie you ever told - deepest fear about growing old
the longest night you ever spent - the angriest letter you never sent
the boy you swore you’d never leave - the one you kissed on new year’s eve
the sweetest dream you had last night - your darkest hour, your hardest fight
I wanna know you - like I know myself

I’m waiting for you - there ain’t no one else
talk to me baby - scream and shout
I wanna know you - inside out
I wanna get down deep - I wanna lose some sleep
I wanna scream and shout - I wanna know you inside out
I wanna take my time - I wanna know your mind
ya know there ain’t no doubt - I wanna know you inside out
The saddest song you ever heard - the most you said with just one word
the loneliest prayer you ever prayed - the truest vow you ever made
what makes you laugh, what makes you cry
what makes you mad, what gets you by
your highest high, your lowest low - these are things I want to know
I wanna know you like I know myself
I’m waitin for you - there ain’t no one else
talk to me baby - scream and shout
I wanna know you - inside out
11. Spurgeon, “The superlative beauty of Jesus is all-attracting; it is not so much to
be admired as to be loved. He is more than pleasant and fair, He is lovely. Surely the
people of God can fully justify the use of this golden word, for He is the object of
their warmest love, a love founded on the intrinsic excellence of His person, the
complete perfection of His charms. Look, O disciples of Jesus, to your Master's lips,
and say, "Are they not most sweet?" Do not His words cause your hearts to burn
within you as He talks with you by the way? Ye worshippers of Immanuel, look up
to His head of much fine gold, and tell me, are not His thoughts precious unto you?
Is not your adoration sweetened with affection as ye humbly bow before that
countenance which is as Lebanon, excellent as the cedars? Is there not a charm in
His every feature, and is not His whole person fragrant with such a savour of His
good ointments, that therefore the virgins love Him? Is there one member of His
glorious body which is not attractive?--one portion of His person which is not a
fresh loadstone to our souls?--one office which is not a strong cord to bind your
heart? Our love is not as a seal set upon His heart of love alone; it is fastened upon
His arm of power also; nor is there a single part of Him upon which it does not fix
itself. We anoint His whole person with the sweet spikenard of our fervent love. His
whole life we would imitate; His whole character we would transcribe. In all other
beings we see some lack, in Him there is all perfection. The best even of His

favoured saints have had blots upon their garments and wrinkles upon their brows;
He is nothing but loveliness. All earthly suns have their spots: the fair world itself
hath its wilderness; we cannot love the whole of the most lovely thing; but Christ
Jesus is gold without alloy-light without darkness--glory without cloud--"Yea, He is
altogether lovely."
APPENDIX A
JAMES PRATT
[ They enter the garden?^
The Shepherd.
Tm come to my garden, my fair one, my love.
And gather my spices and myrrh from the grove ;
My food is of honey, extracted from flowers,
The fairest and sweetest that bloom in the bowers ;
My drink is of milk, and of generous wines
Produced from the grapes of the choicest of vines ;
My much-loved companions, oh, hither repair,
My fruits and my wines now abundantly share.
V.
[A Room in the Kin^s Palace. The Shidamite,

brought back again^ relates to the Daughters of
Jerusalem a dream she had of her beloved, ^^
The Shulamite.
At night when wearied I was sleeping,*
My anxious heart awake was keeping,
And thus methought that I could hear
The voice of one to me most dear.
He gently knockM, and said, " My love,
Open to me, my own sweet dove ;
My head the evening dews have chillM,
My hair the drops of night have fillM."
My robe, I petulantly cried,
I have put off and laid aside,
And must I dress again ?
Must I arise ? and is it meet
That I again should soil my feet
And have them washM in vain }
.Then from the door my own beloved
His hand too speedily removed —
And soon my heart was torn in twain
At those sad words he spoke in vain.
No more delay could I abide —
I rose, and ran to open wide
The door of my abode.
Then from my hands with perfumes ' fillM,
Richly the liquid myrrh distillM,
And down the portal flowM,
I opened to my loved one wide**
But ah ! my heart within me died,
My loved one was not there.
I sought him, but I sought in vain ;

I caird ! he answered not again
The cry of my despair.
The guards in their patrol at night
Then met me in my rapid flight —
And heartless, made me stay.
With cruel blows they struck me down,
While they who keep our walls and town
Tore all my veil away.
Daughters of Zion, fair and kind !
If ye my loved one e'er should find,
I charge you tell him how I languish —
How pines my loving heart with anguish.
The Daughters of Jerusalem.,
Fairest of maidens, we beseech thee tell
In what thou deem'st thy loved one to excel,
Wherein is he superior, tell us pray ?
Since thou hast charged us in this solemn way.
The Shulamite.
My loved one's countenance is beaming bright,
Fair his complexion, mingled red and white ;
Amid the noblest youths in all the lands,
Chief above thousands he unrivallM stands.
To gold for preciousness I would compare
His head adornM with locks of raven hair ;

His eyes, which softly in their fulness beam.
Are likfe doves bathing in the limpid stream.
His cheeks resemble choicest flower-beds,
Whose grateful fragrance thro' the garden spreads ;
His lips the ear with words encbanti ng fill.
As lilies sweet pellucid drops distil.
His arms are set like cylinders of gold
Inlaid with beryl, beauteous to behold ;
His body may be likenM when array'd
To ivory, with sapphires overlaid ;
His limbs appear as marble pillars based
On golden pedestals securely placed ;
His aspect is as Lebanon renownM,
Distinguished as the lofty cedars round ;
His voice is exquisitely sweet to hear,
He is all lovely, and to me most dear.
Daughters of Zion, beautiful and wise.
Such is my loved one, such the one I prize.

The Song of Songs Chapter 5: Love and Sexuality in Marriage

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