Unit 4 Essay Due Sunday by 1159pm Points 130 Submitting .docx

Unit 4: Essay
Due Sunday by 11:59pm Points 130 Submitting a file upload
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Higher Education for the Twenty-First Century: Re-designing
Student Success
For essay #3, perform a significant revision to last unit's essay.
Revise your work by doing the following:
• Include at least two additional outside perspectives on the
future of higher education. (You will discover these outside
perspectives by conducting
library research, and you will include them via quotation,
paraphrase, and/or summary, which we will practice in this
unit's discussion.)
• Argue for specific recommendations about how higher
education could be re-designed for the students of the twenty-
first century.
As you revise last unit's essays to meet these new goals, you
may also expand, edit, restructure, and delete from your second
essay, in order to make a
clear, effective argument about how to adjust college education
for today's students. This unit's essay should not merely be last
unit's with a few new

paragraphs tacked on, but should be a re-envisioned essay.
You might begin by designing a working thesis about how
higher education needs to change. Then, begin researching what
other writers have said
already about your ideas. Start with an search on your subject
using the Park University McAfee Memorial Library’s Pirate
Search feature
(http://www.park.edu/library/) , but also consider consulting
Google Scholar (http://scholar.google.com) . We will spend
time this unit discussing and
analyzing sources together.
Think about what you would like to teach your readers about
how higher education should change. Consider making precise,
practical
recommendations. Be sure to provide explicit reasoning, and
describe the implications of your ideas for today's college
students of history. Make sure
that every paragraph of Essay #3 points your readers toward
your particular focus and argument.
Some of you may find it possible to use some material from
essay #2, and others will simply use essay #2 as a launching off
point. Either way, I will be
looking for a revised thesis, enhanced supporting arguments,
incorporation of new research, etc. Remember the difference
between revision and

editing; this is a revision project, not an exercise in editing
essay #2. In short, although you will use essay #2 as a basis,
essay #3 should be a significant
re-envisioning, with a revised thesis and development. Essay #3
should have a new title to reflect this revised content.
Please craft a short description (this can be in bulleted list form
if you would like) of the changes and transformations you made
in revising essay #2 to
create essay #3. Submit this description as either a second file
or as a new page (after Works Cited) at the end of your essay #3
file. Failure to submit
this required information will result in a letter grade deduction
from essay #3.
Guidelines for Essay #3
Length/Due Date: approximately 1,000 words, due Sunday
midnight Central Standard Time (CST).
Style/Format: This, as all essays in EN106, should be formatted
in a standard scholarly format. (Most students follow MLA or
APA guidelines, which are
outlined in Easy Writer.) No matter what format you follow, be
sure to do the following:
• Use 12 point, Times New Roman font, double-spaced.
• Use 1-inch margins top, bottom, and sides.
• Although no cover page is needed, you should include your
name, my name, the course number/title, and date at the upper

left-hand corner of the
manuscript.
Research & Documentation: Because you will rely on the work
of others to make your argument, this essay must include formal
references to not only
the assigned readings but also the sources you locate via
research. Use your skills of quotation, paraphrase, and summary
to incorporate these other
writers' perspectives, and be sure to provide in-text citations
using a standard scholarly style outlined in Easy Writer, such as
MLA or APA.
File format: Please submit your essay as a .doc, .docx, or .pdf
file. These formats are available in most word processors,
including Google Docs and
Open Office, and will ensure that your instructor is able to
comment on your work.
Works Cited/References: Your essay should include an
appropriate bibliography, with an entry for each individual
source you reference in the body of
the essay. See Easy Writer for directions on how to create
appropriate entries for works appearing in an anthology and
articles archived in a database.
(Hint: Look for the terms "anthology" and "database" in the
directories for models in Easy Writer.)
Titles: Include a descriptive title at the beginning of your essay
that tips your readers off to your thesis. Do not format your title

with quotation marks,
boldface, underlining or italics. Quotation marks or underlining
are only appropriate if the title borrows words from another
source.
Deadline: Submit your final draft essay no later than Midnight
CST on Sunday at the end of this unit.
Use of essays for future courses: Please understand that your
essay may be used— anonymously—as a sample for future
EN106 students and
instructors unless you expressly request that it not be used.
Your work, of course, will only be used for educational
purposes.
EN 106 Online Rubric (Essay #3)
Assessment: See the Grading and Assessment content item
under Course Information.
Criteria Ratings Pts
25.0 pts
40.0 pts
40.0 pts

25.0 pts
Focus
view longer
description
Exceeds Standard: The essay
is clearly focused around a
creative and insightful central
thesis/message. The writer lays
out clear reasons/points that
contribute to the overall central
thesis/message. Everything in
the essay contributes to the
development of the message.
25.0 pts
Above Standard: The essay is
clearly focused around a
creative and insightful central
thesis/message. There are
several interesting points that

support it. One place may
wander a bit or need more
development, but otherwise
the focus is clear and
interesting.
21.0 pts
At Standard: The essay is
focused around a central
thesis/message. Parts of the
essay might stray from this
focus, but the overall
message is there. The focus
of the essay might be
simplistic or obvious—it might
be hard for the reader to feel
engaged.
19.0 pts
Below Standard: There is no

clear central thesis/message,
or the focus is split across a
variety of topics in a way that
works against a specific focus.
The overall point might be
unclear, confusing, or the writer
might indicate a focus, but little
in the essay supports this
focus.
15.0 pts
No evidence
/ no
assignment
submitted
0.0 pts
Development
view longer
description

Exceeds Standard: There is a
variety of support (anecdotes,
quotes, description, examples,
etc.). The support is vivid,
concrete, and connects clearly
to the message of the essay.
The essay raises well-thought
out questions, or pursues a
line of reasoning in an
unexpected or unusual
direction. The language and
examples are clear and
interesting. There are
connections to other texts or
examples that make the
writer’s argument more vivid
and clear.
40.0 pts

Above Standard: There is a
variety of vivid support that
illustrates and explains the
points the writer makes. The
evidence could be expanded
in one or two places. The
essay raises interesting and
creative questions about a text
or topic, and/or makes
interesting connections with
material. There are places
where an idea is undeveloped
or remains obvious, but the
writer is clearly working toward
moving beyond the obvious.
35.0 pts
At Standard: There are
supporting details for many of

the claims, but some parts of
the essay may be overly
general and vague. Some
evidence might be
unnecessary or distracting
(doesn’t support thesis). The
essay moves slightly beyond
summary or pointing out the
obvious, but the essay might
still have a vague or generic
voice. The essay may lack
figurative language or details
that would enhance the
writer’s message.
30.0 pts
Below Standard: Details that
would support the claims the
writer is making are vague or

missing. In key places, the writer
has not effectively shown what
he/she means. Almost all points
remain abstract or general. The
essay only touches upon the
surface of a reading or topic,
perhaps remaining only a
summary, or only pointing out
the immediately obvious about a
topic. The wording is vague, and
there is little evidence that the
writer invested significant time
or thought into the essay.
26.0 pts
No evidence
/ no
assignment
submitted

0.0 pts
Organization
view longer
description
Exceeds Standard: The
introduction and conclusion
creatively tie the message
together. Each paragraph is
focused and effectively developed
around an individual point. The
overall paragraph organization is
effective and creative. Transitions
are effective and establish
complex relationships between
points.
40.0 pts
Above Standard: There is
an engaging and well-
organized introduction,

body, and conclusion.
Individual paragraphs are
well-organized and
developed. Essay may
need paragraph breaks or
more effective transitions.
35.0 pts
At Standard: There is a clear
introduction, body, and
conclusion. Several places in
the essay need more effective
transitions and/or paragraph
breaks. Some paragraphs may
need to be moved. Individual
paragraph organization may be
confusing in one or two places.
30.0 pts
Below Standard: No sense of

introduction, body, and
conclusion. There might be a
clear middle, beginning and
end with the content, but
paragraph breaks don’t make
sense or are missing. Overall
organization of points might
be confusing or jumpy.
26.0 pts
No evidence
/ no
assignment
submitted
0.0 pts
Mechanics
view longer
description
Exceeds Standard: The

sentences are complex and
effective, and the word choice is
sophisticated. The writer uses
sentence structure and word
choice in creative ways to
establish tone and meaning.
There may be one or two very
minor errors, but no patterns of
error. All words and ideas from
sources external to the writer are
accurately documented via
standard academic
documentation guidelines (i.e.,
MLA or APA.
Above Standard: The essay is
clear with complex sentence
structures. There may be a
minor grammar problem such

as misplaced apostrophes or
missing commas in certain
places, but the rest
demonstrates a mastery of
conventional grammar. Word
choice might be off in one or
two places. Documentation is
essentially complete and
accurate.
21.0 pts
At Standard: The essay is
generally clear, but sentence
structure may be simplistic
and/or slightly repetitive. There
are several grammar error
patterns but nothing that
seriously interferes with
reading, perhaps a few comma

splices and fragments. Word
choice might be confusing in
one or two places.
Documentation is missing in
some areas or incorrectly
applied.
19.0 pts
Below Standard: There are
several grammar patterns
that seriously inhibit
understanding, perhaps a
pattern of fragments or run-
ons throughout. Wording
and sentence structure are
confused to the point where
they interfere with the
reader’s understanding.
Documentation is incorrect

or absent.
15.0 pts
No evidence
/ no
assignment
submitted
0.0 pts
Total Points: 130.0
Criteria Ratings Pts
25.0 pts
Genz 5
English 106
9 April 2017
Changes in Higher Education System
Introduction
This paper explains the changes that have occurred in the higher
education system in the modern times. The ideas of Pablo Freire
and Mark Edmondson are compared and contrasted regarding
this topic. Higher education is an optional final stage of formal
learning that occurs after completion of secondary education. It
is accessible at universities, colleges, and other large institutes

of technology. It is also offered through certain college-level
institutions, including vocational schools, trade schools, and
other certified colleges that award academic
degrees or professional certifications (Hurley 5). Higher
education at non-degree level is sometimes referred to as further
education or continuing studies as it has no difference from
higher education.
In recent researches, they show how education has been
capitalized by the students as shown in Mark Edmondson’s idea
and he focuses on how institutions of higher education have
permitted the private enterprise consumers to attend the classes.
He discussed how things have changed over time as compared to
when he was a student. For example, when he was in college,
the lecturers encouraged the students through teaching and not
entertaining them while in class. He discusses how the modern
system has also given students more power over their teachers.
He shows dislike for the new system which allows the student to
choose teachers of their own preference where the majority try
to avoid teachers who are stricter.
Recently, as a college teacher, Mark entertains the students to
ensure they are attentive in class and to avoid offending them.
He uses training methods as those of Paulo Freire which goes
against the banking concept of education. This concept views
knowledge as a gift passed down from knowledgeable
intellectuals (teachers) to those that know nothing(students).
The raison d'etre of libertarian education concept focuses on
viewing teachers and student as equals. Thus, it involves
solving problems that are caused by negotiations and persuasive
misunderstandings between students and teachers.
Both Pablo and Mark assumed that this type of teaching is
suitable for students as it allows more critical and creative
thinking. They consider the banking system of education to be
oppressive to the learners; Moreover, they believe that system
forces the students to conform to the ideals of their teachers
other than thinking and having ideas of their own. It thus
threatens the student’s critical consciousness. Mark believes in

open forum lessons which are taught because they require more
profound knowledge of the subject offered. He emphasizes on
the use of group projects among the students and creating a
conducive environment for the exchange of ideas. However, he
is more open to the old-fashioned exchange between teachers
and students in the classroom. This, He believes allows the
teachers to correct the mistakes of the student and casts a new
perspective on their ideas; Moreover, it improves the students’
vocabulary on the topic in hand. The teachers are helpful in
showing the students the way to harness their ideas.
Freire believes that keeping all lectures close- minded and
independent is a false sense of reality because it does not need a
lot more than memorization. Hence, it permits the students and
their teachers to become subjects of the learning process. He
encourages that the teacher relationship should be symbiotic so
as both parties acquire knowledge. This enables other people to
overcome the false insight of reality.
By overcoming this false insight, people will have a deeper
consciousness of their environment. It will lead the people to
ask questions about various subjects that affect their society.
These may include leadership. Specifically, leadership that is
oppressive to its citizen. It also encourages the learners to come
up with new ideas as to how to approach an obstacle in day-to-
day activities.
On the other hand, Edmundson believes in the same method
although he discusses how to use this method in class. He
believes that teachers should be allowed to be more superior to
the student in some aspects. He seems nauseated by how
confronting students has become “offensive” in the higher
levels of education and how teachers who confront students
generate trouble for themselves. He notes that there is an air of
caution everywhere. He believes in the productive confrontation
with the students. Confrontation from his perspective builds
character which he noticed lacked in his students.
Mark, however, moves away from class work and learning in
order to ensure his students participate in their activities.

Edmundson explains his purpose of teaching and describes his
reasons of amusing the student that he does that as a professor
and not to be their favorite teacher. At some point, when young
people are beginning their college careers they approach
Edmundson ideas and ask what they ought to search for when
they get to campus. This helps them know how to discover who
their great instructors are. It does not make a difference because
they are supposed to find a genuine instructor, who will help
them to change and discover what to become in future. This can
be the considerable endowment of a liberal instruction.
For example, Mr. Edmundson loved to teach, yet he despised
the conditions under which much teaching happens today, even
at a world class college like Virginia. These conditions make a
genuine instructor an endangered group in the academic
environment. In this exact situation, Mr. Edmundson helps us to
keep in mind the power firm educators needed to formulate
students’ thinking about their identity and who they may
become as they progress in future. This is what really matters to
a genuine instructor.
For example, the Professors in the humanities and social
sciences are anticipated to apply the most popular analyses to
their disciplines. But mythical or cultural criticism can disrupt a
student’s chances to find out the author being analyzed, he
writes, where she would learn “that there are other ways of
looking at the world and other ways of being in the globe than
the ones she inherited from her family and culture.”
Conclusion
Since the 1950s to the present, more people have gone on to
pursue degrees and other certificates of higher education.
However, in recent discussions, they indicate that a degree
nowadays is not worthy as it used to be there before to the
employers (Kohn 32). This has been caused be the relaxation
and interactions of students to lecturers. For instance, Mark and
Freire describe how professors entertain students to avoid
annoying them and capture their attention other than dealing
with the fundamentals of education. Mark welcomes the

changes; however, he feels the students should be more open to
criticism from their teachers without feeling offended as is goes
for their advantage.
References
Hurley, J. Casey. "What Does It Mean to Be Educated?" Mid-
Western Educational
Researcher 24.4 (2011): 2-4.
http://eds.b.ebscohost.com.pegleg.park.edu/eds/pdfviewer/pdfvi
ewer?sid=e23cf4ff-32fb-4a16-b807-
ee57bfdc1cfc%40sessionmgr120&vid=4&hid=120
Kohn, Alfie. What does it mean to be well educated? And more
essays on standards, grading,
and other follies. Beacon Press, 2004. Pg 24-56
"“On The Uses Of A Liberal Education: As Lite Entertainment
For Bored College Students” By Mark Edmundson". Critical
Thinker, 2017,
http://herculodge.typepad.com/critical_thinker/2015/10/on-the-
uses-of-a-liberal-education-as-lite-entertainment-for-bored-
college-students-by-mark-edmundson.html
Freire, P. (1993). The Banking Concept of Education (M.
Bergman Ramos, Trans.). Pedagogy of the Oppressed (Chap 2).
New York: Continuum.
Greene, S., & Lidinsky, A. (2015). From inquiry to academic
writing: a text and reader (Third ed.). Boston: Bedford/St.
Martin's.
.

Unit 4 Essay Due Sunday by 1159pm Points 130 Submitting .docx

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