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Funny Predictions A collection of less than visionary predictions throughout history.
X-rays are a hoax. Lord Kelvin, Scotish mathematician and physicist, former president of the Royal Society, 1897
The abolishment of pain in surgery is a chimera.  It is absurd to go on seeking it… knife and pain are two words in surgery that must forever be  associated in the consciousness of patients. Dr. Alfred Velpeau (1839) French surgeon
Ruth made a big mistake when he gave up pitching.  Tris Speaker on fellow ballplayer Babe Ruth in 1921
When the Paris Exhibition closes electric light will close with it and no more be heard of. Erasmus Wilson (1878) Professor at Oxford University
By the year 1982 the graduated income tax will have practically abolished major differences in wealth. Irwin Edman, professor of philosophy, Columbia University, 1932
You had better get secretarial work or get married. Emmeline Snively, director of the Blue Book Modelling Agency advising would-be model Marilyn Monroe in 1944
It will be gone by June. Entertainment newspaper Variety on Rock and Roll in 1955
Space travel is utter bilge. Richard van der Riet Woolley, upon assuming the post of British Astronomer Royal in 1956
You ain’t going nowhere son - you ought to go back to driving a truck. Jim Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, on firing Elvis Presley after one performance in 1954
This antitrust thing will blow over. Bill Gates
Radio has no future. Lord Kelvin, Scotish mathematician and physicist, former president of the Royal Society, 1897
Everything that can be invented has been invented. Charles Duell, U. S. commissioner of patents, 1899
I must confess that my imagination refuses to see any sort of submarine doing anything but suffocating its crew and floundering at sea. H. G. Wells British novelist 1901
The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty – a fad. The president of the Michigan Savings Bank advising Horace Rachham (Henry Ford’s lawyer) not to invest in the Ford Motor Co. 1903
I confess that in 1901, I said to my brother Orville that man would not fly for 50 years… Ever since, I have distrusted myself and avoided all predictions. Wilbur Wright, U. S. aviation pioneer, 1908
Airplanes are interesting toys, but of no military value. Marshall Ferdinand Foch, French military strategist and future World War I commander, 1911
What use could this company make of an electrical toy? Western Union president William Orton rejecting Alexander Graham Bell’s offer to sell his struggling telephone company to Western Union for $100,000
Television won’t be able to hold on to any market it captures after the first six months.  People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night. Darryl F. Zanuck, head of 20 th  Century Fox - 1946
Computers in the future may perhaps only weigh 1.5 tons. Popular Mechanics forecasting the development of computer technology, 1949
I see no advantage whatsoever to the graphical user interface. Bill Gates - 1983
Man will never reach the moon, regardless of all future Scientific advances. Dr, Lee De Forest, inventor of the audion tube and a father of radio – February 25, 1967
I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943
I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won’t last out the year. The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957
But what… is it good for? Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968 commenting on the microchip.
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. Ken Olson, president, chairman, and founder of now defunct Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication.  This device is inherently of no value to us. Western Union internal memo, 1876
This wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value.  Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? David Sarnoff’s associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920’s
The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a ‘C,’ the idea must be feasible. A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith’s paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)
Nobody now feels that a Japanese fleet could deal an unexpected blow on our Pacific possessions… radio makes surprise impossible. Josephus Daniels, former U. S.  Secretary of the Navy – October 16, 1922
Who the hell wants to hear actors talk? H. M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927
I’m just glad it’ll be Clark Gable falling on his face and not Gary Cooper. Gary Cooper on his decision  not  to take the leading role in Gone With the Wind.
A cookie store is a bad idea.  Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. Response to Debbie Fields’ idea of starting Mrs. Fields’ cookies
We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962
Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895
If I had thought about it, I wouldn’t have done the experiment.  The literature was full of examples that said you can’t do this. Spencer Silver on the work that led to the unique adhesives for 3-M Post-It Notepads
So we went to Atari and said, ‘Hey, we’ve got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us?  Or we’ll give it to you.  We just want to do it.  Pay our salary, we’ll come work for you.’  And they said, ‘No’ So then we went to Hewlett-Packard, and they said, ‘Hey, we don’t need you.  You haven’t got through college yet.’ Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs on attempts to get Atari and H-P interested in his and Steve Wozniak’s personal computer
You want to have consistent and uniform muscle development across all of your muscles?  It can’t be done. Its just a fact of life.  You just have to accept inconsistent muscle development as an unalterable condition of weight training. Response to Arthur Jones, who solved the unsolvable problem by inventing Nautilus
Drill for oil?  You mean drill in the ground to try to find oil?  You’re crazy. Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859
Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau. Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics, Yale University, 1929
Louis Pasteur’s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction. Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872
The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon. Sir John Eric Erickson, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria 1873
640k ought to be enough for anybody. Bill Gates, 1981
What can be more palpably absurd than the prospect held out of locomotives traveling twice as fast as stagecoaches? The Quarterly Review, England (March 1825)
Men might as well project a voyage to the moon as attempt to communicate electronically across or under the stormy North Atlantic Ocean. Dr. Dionysus Lardner (1838) Professor of Natural Philosophy and Astronomy, University College, London
The foolish idea of shooting at the moon is an example of the absurd length to which vicious specialization will carry scientists working in thought-tight compartments. A. W. Bickerton (1926) Professor of Physics and Chemistry, Canterbury College, New Zealand
Well informed people know that it is impossible to transmit the voice over wires and that were it possible to do so, the thing would be of no practical value. Editorial in the Boston Post (1865)
That the automobile has practically reached the limit of its development is suggested by the fact that during the past year no improvements of a radical nature have been introduced Scientific American, Jan. 2, 1909
There is not the slightest indication that [nuclear energy] will ever be attainable.  It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at will. Albert Einstein, 1932
While theoretically and technically television may be feasible, commercially and financially I consider it an impossibility, a development of which we need waste little time dreaming. Lee Deforest, (1926) American radio pioneer
Brain work will cause women to go bald. Berlin professor, 1914
Television won’t matter in your lifetime or mine. Radio Times editor Rex Lambert, 1936
And for the tourist who really wants to get away from it all, safaris in Vietnam. Newsweek magazine, predicting popular holidays for the late 1960’s
I expect to win it.  Sit back, put your feet up in front of the TV, relax and enjoy it.  Let me do the worrying – that’s what I get paid for. England manager Graham Taylor before the 1992 European championships. England didn’t win a game.
I have always found strangers sexy. Hugh Grant, six months before he was arrested with stranger Divine Brown.
I would not wish to be Prime Minister, dear. Margaret Thatcher to her husband in 1973.
That rainbow song’s no good.  Take it out. MGM memo after first showing of The Wizard of Oz
Forget it.  No Civil War picture ever made a nickel. MGM executive, advising against investing in Gone With the Wind
Can’t act. Can’t sing. Slightly bald. Can dance a little. A film company’s verdict on Fred Astaire’s 1928 screen test
Very interesting, Whittle, my boy, but it will never work. Professor of Aeronautical Engineering at Cambridge, shown Frank Whittle’s plan for the jet engine.
The Beatles? They’re on the wane. The Duke of Edinburg in Canada, 1965.  They went on to produce a string of No. 1 hits.
The atom bomb will never go off – and I speak as an expert in explosives. U. S. Admiral William Leahy in 1945
All Saved from Titanic After Collision Newspaper headline in New York
I see no reason to suppose that these machines will ever force themselves into general use. Duke of Wellington, (1769-1852) Referring to the steam locomotive
Sir, I have tested your machine.  It adds new terror to life and makes death a long-felt want. Herbert Beerbohm Tree, British actor and theatre manager, referring to a gramophone
You won’t have Nixon to kick around anymore, gentlemen.  This is my last press conference. Richard Nixon – after losing the election for governorship of California.  Press conference Nov. 2, 1962
I believe it is peace for our time… peace with honour. Neville Chamberlain (1869-1940) British statesman.  Broadcast after the Munich agreement, Oct. 1 1938.
It will be years – and not in my time – before a woman will lead the party or become Prime Minister. Margaret Thatcher (1974) British politician and eventually the first woman to become Prime minister.
The End

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Predictions

  • 1. Funny Predictions A collection of less than visionary predictions throughout history.
  • 2. X-rays are a hoax. Lord Kelvin, Scotish mathematician and physicist, former president of the Royal Society, 1897
  • 3. The abolishment of pain in surgery is a chimera. It is absurd to go on seeking it… knife and pain are two words in surgery that must forever be associated in the consciousness of patients. Dr. Alfred Velpeau (1839) French surgeon
  • 4. Ruth made a big mistake when he gave up pitching. Tris Speaker on fellow ballplayer Babe Ruth in 1921
  • 5. When the Paris Exhibition closes electric light will close with it and no more be heard of. Erasmus Wilson (1878) Professor at Oxford University
  • 6. By the year 1982 the graduated income tax will have practically abolished major differences in wealth. Irwin Edman, professor of philosophy, Columbia University, 1932
  • 7. You had better get secretarial work or get married. Emmeline Snively, director of the Blue Book Modelling Agency advising would-be model Marilyn Monroe in 1944
  • 8. It will be gone by June. Entertainment newspaper Variety on Rock and Roll in 1955
  • 9. Space travel is utter bilge. Richard van der Riet Woolley, upon assuming the post of British Astronomer Royal in 1956
  • 10. You ain’t going nowhere son - you ought to go back to driving a truck. Jim Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, on firing Elvis Presley after one performance in 1954
  • 11. This antitrust thing will blow over. Bill Gates
  • 12. Radio has no future. Lord Kelvin, Scotish mathematician and physicist, former president of the Royal Society, 1897
  • 13. Everything that can be invented has been invented. Charles Duell, U. S. commissioner of patents, 1899
  • 14. I must confess that my imagination refuses to see any sort of submarine doing anything but suffocating its crew and floundering at sea. H. G. Wells British novelist 1901
  • 15. The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty – a fad. The president of the Michigan Savings Bank advising Horace Rachham (Henry Ford’s lawyer) not to invest in the Ford Motor Co. 1903
  • 16. I confess that in 1901, I said to my brother Orville that man would not fly for 50 years… Ever since, I have distrusted myself and avoided all predictions. Wilbur Wright, U. S. aviation pioneer, 1908
  • 17. Airplanes are interesting toys, but of no military value. Marshall Ferdinand Foch, French military strategist and future World War I commander, 1911
  • 18. What use could this company make of an electrical toy? Western Union president William Orton rejecting Alexander Graham Bell’s offer to sell his struggling telephone company to Western Union for $100,000
  • 19. Television won’t be able to hold on to any market it captures after the first six months. People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night. Darryl F. Zanuck, head of 20 th Century Fox - 1946
  • 20. Computers in the future may perhaps only weigh 1.5 tons. Popular Mechanics forecasting the development of computer technology, 1949
  • 21. I see no advantage whatsoever to the graphical user interface. Bill Gates - 1983
  • 22. Man will never reach the moon, regardless of all future Scientific advances. Dr, Lee De Forest, inventor of the audion tube and a father of radio – February 25, 1967
  • 23. I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943
  • 24. I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won’t last out the year. The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957
  • 25. But what… is it good for? Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968 commenting on the microchip.
  • 26. There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. Ken Olson, president, chairman, and founder of now defunct Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
  • 27. This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. This device is inherently of no value to us. Western Union internal memo, 1876
  • 28. This wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? David Sarnoff’s associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920’s
  • 29. The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a ‘C,’ the idea must be feasible. A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith’s paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)
  • 30. Nobody now feels that a Japanese fleet could deal an unexpected blow on our Pacific possessions… radio makes surprise impossible. Josephus Daniels, former U. S. Secretary of the Navy – October 16, 1922
  • 31. Who the hell wants to hear actors talk? H. M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927
  • 32. I’m just glad it’ll be Clark Gable falling on his face and not Gary Cooper. Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in Gone With the Wind.
  • 33. A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. Response to Debbie Fields’ idea of starting Mrs. Fields’ cookies
  • 34. We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962
  • 35. Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895
  • 36. If I had thought about it, I wouldn’t have done the experiment. The literature was full of examples that said you can’t do this. Spencer Silver on the work that led to the unique adhesives for 3-M Post-It Notepads
  • 37. So we went to Atari and said, ‘Hey, we’ve got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us? Or we’ll give it to you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we’ll come work for you.’ And they said, ‘No’ So then we went to Hewlett-Packard, and they said, ‘Hey, we don’t need you. You haven’t got through college yet.’ Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs on attempts to get Atari and H-P interested in his and Steve Wozniak’s personal computer
  • 38. You want to have consistent and uniform muscle development across all of your muscles? It can’t be done. Its just a fact of life. You just have to accept inconsistent muscle development as an unalterable condition of weight training. Response to Arthur Jones, who solved the unsolvable problem by inventing Nautilus
  • 39. Drill for oil? You mean drill in the ground to try to find oil? You’re crazy. Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859
  • 40. Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau. Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics, Yale University, 1929
  • 41. Louis Pasteur’s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction. Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872
  • 42. The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon. Sir John Eric Erickson, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria 1873
  • 43. 640k ought to be enough for anybody. Bill Gates, 1981
  • 44. What can be more palpably absurd than the prospect held out of locomotives traveling twice as fast as stagecoaches? The Quarterly Review, England (March 1825)
  • 45. Men might as well project a voyage to the moon as attempt to communicate electronically across or under the stormy North Atlantic Ocean. Dr. Dionysus Lardner (1838) Professor of Natural Philosophy and Astronomy, University College, London
  • 46. The foolish idea of shooting at the moon is an example of the absurd length to which vicious specialization will carry scientists working in thought-tight compartments. A. W. Bickerton (1926) Professor of Physics and Chemistry, Canterbury College, New Zealand
  • 47. Well informed people know that it is impossible to transmit the voice over wires and that were it possible to do so, the thing would be of no practical value. Editorial in the Boston Post (1865)
  • 48. That the automobile has practically reached the limit of its development is suggested by the fact that during the past year no improvements of a radical nature have been introduced Scientific American, Jan. 2, 1909
  • 49. There is not the slightest indication that [nuclear energy] will ever be attainable. It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at will. Albert Einstein, 1932
  • 50. While theoretically and technically television may be feasible, commercially and financially I consider it an impossibility, a development of which we need waste little time dreaming. Lee Deforest, (1926) American radio pioneer
  • 51. Brain work will cause women to go bald. Berlin professor, 1914
  • 52. Television won’t matter in your lifetime or mine. Radio Times editor Rex Lambert, 1936
  • 53. And for the tourist who really wants to get away from it all, safaris in Vietnam. Newsweek magazine, predicting popular holidays for the late 1960’s
  • 54. I expect to win it. Sit back, put your feet up in front of the TV, relax and enjoy it. Let me do the worrying – that’s what I get paid for. England manager Graham Taylor before the 1992 European championships. England didn’t win a game.
  • 55. I have always found strangers sexy. Hugh Grant, six months before he was arrested with stranger Divine Brown.
  • 56. I would not wish to be Prime Minister, dear. Margaret Thatcher to her husband in 1973.
  • 57. That rainbow song’s no good. Take it out. MGM memo after first showing of The Wizard of Oz
  • 58. Forget it. No Civil War picture ever made a nickel. MGM executive, advising against investing in Gone With the Wind
  • 59. Can’t act. Can’t sing. Slightly bald. Can dance a little. A film company’s verdict on Fred Astaire’s 1928 screen test
  • 60. Very interesting, Whittle, my boy, but it will never work. Professor of Aeronautical Engineering at Cambridge, shown Frank Whittle’s plan for the jet engine.
  • 61. The Beatles? They’re on the wane. The Duke of Edinburg in Canada, 1965. They went on to produce a string of No. 1 hits.
  • 62. The atom bomb will never go off – and I speak as an expert in explosives. U. S. Admiral William Leahy in 1945
  • 63. All Saved from Titanic After Collision Newspaper headline in New York
  • 64. I see no reason to suppose that these machines will ever force themselves into general use. Duke of Wellington, (1769-1852) Referring to the steam locomotive
  • 65. Sir, I have tested your machine. It adds new terror to life and makes death a long-felt want. Herbert Beerbohm Tree, British actor and theatre manager, referring to a gramophone
  • 66. You won’t have Nixon to kick around anymore, gentlemen. This is my last press conference. Richard Nixon – after losing the election for governorship of California. Press conference Nov. 2, 1962
  • 67. I believe it is peace for our time… peace with honour. Neville Chamberlain (1869-1940) British statesman. Broadcast after the Munich agreement, Oct. 1 1938.
  • 68. It will be years – and not in my time – before a woman will lead the party or become Prime Minister. Margaret Thatcher (1974) British politician and eventually the first woman to become Prime minister.