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do you ever feel depressed?




                      A YoungMinds Booklet
page   2         ✪              ✪                                           ✪                             ✪            ✪          page    3

 We a l l h a v e t o d e a l w i t h d i f f e r e n t k i n d s    For a small number of people, feeling down or depressed can go
                                                                     on for a long time so they can’t get on with their everyday lives.
 of feelings and emotions                                            But if you’re feeling down or depressed in any way, then this


                                                           ✪
                                           d                         booklet is for you.
                                     c ite
 Sometimes we feel h a p p y and e x                                 Why do I feel like this?
 At other times, we’ll feel s a d and d o                            ‘Mum walked out on me and my brother, and dad got a job in
                                          wn                         another part of the country so we had to move. Mum didn’t
                                                                     want to see us any more, because she said she had a new life.
 There are plenty of things that might make you worry. But
                                                                     Dad started drinking. It’s like I lost everything I knew.’
 people feel and react to different things in different ways. It’s
 normal to feel stressed, anxious or lonely from time to time, or    There are lots of things that can make you feel down or
                                                                     depressed.

                                                                                                                          ✪ ☛
 that no-one understands us. But for most people, these feelings
 come and go.                                                        Over the page are just some examples...
page   4         if someone close to
                 you is ill, or dies
                                                  worrying about how you look
                                                                                        ✪                                                          page       5
                                    worrying about
feeling guilty or responsible
for someone else’s behaviour        your sexuality            feeling left out    How do I know if I’m feeling depressed?
                                                              and not being
                                                              part of a group     ‘ I couldn’t concentrate on my work. I was always daydreaming, and
moving or leaving home          feeling useless                                   wanted to sleep a lot. I couldn't be bothered to do anything.
                                and worthless               arguing with          Sometimes when I felt really low it was scary, and I’d start messing
 having a parent or                                         friends or family     about at school, getting into trouble. Anything not to feel like that...’
 carer who is               changes in your family
 depressed or worried       or becoming part of a                                 It’s ok not to feel positive or happy all the time. It’s always good
                                                           thinking things will
 about other things         new family                                            to talk to someone about how you feel to understand more and
                                                           never get better


                                                                                                                                                   ✪
                                                                                  feel more in charge. If you feel like harming yourself it’s
 having trouble with       worrying about exams                                   important to get help.
 your boyfriend or         or getting disappointing         being bullied at
 girlfriend, or even       results                          school or elsewhere   If it is hard to talk to someone you know, there are a lot of
 just a close friend                                                              places that offer advice and help. Some organisations are listed
                            feeling you have                                      at the end of this booklet.
                                                                  if you have

                                                                                                                                                      ☛
if someone close to         no-one to talk to and that            been abused
you moves away              no-one understands you
page   6                                                                                                                                         page     7

 People show they are unhappy in different ways...
                                                       ✪                               Wa y s t o h e l p a f r i e n d i f t h e y ’ r e u n h a p p y
 lying or making
 up stories
                          feeling life is
                          not worth living          ✪          worrying
                                                               about things
                                                                                   ✪
                                                                                       or feeling depressed

                                                                                       ✪ listen and try to be sympathetic
  eating a lot more or a lot                             being moody or
                                      not wanting
  less than usual                                        irritable or snappy           ✪ don’t expect them just to snap out of it
                                      to go out
                                                                                       ✪ don’t criticise or tease them


                                                                                                                                             ✪
having trouble sleeping                                          crying a lot
                               feeling like harming yourself                           ✪ try and get them to talk about how they feel
or having bad dreams
                                                                                       ✪ be patient and allow them time to talk
                                                        feeling no-one likes you
 stealing things or        feeling lazy or bored        or people are talking          ✪ try and help them look for help
 getting into trouble      and tired a lot              behind your back

 Maybe you recognise some of these in yourself or in a friend?
                                                                                                                                                    ☛
page   8                                                                      ✪                                  ✪                       page   9

 Wa y s t o h e l p y o u r s e l f                                        It’s important that anyone who feels depressed finds ways to cope.
                                                                           There are often good reasons why you feel down. So if you’re
 ’After I felt depressed a few times I knew I’d always come out of         feeling depressed, don’t be afraid and don’t panic.
 it, and just tried to do things to distract myself till it passed. That
 helped a bit. It was horrible thinking it might come back though.         And always remember, feeling sad and unhappy will come to an


                                                                                                                                           ✪
 In the end I went for counselling, which helped me feel more in           end, even if you sometimes find it hard to imagine.
 control of my life.’

 ‘I didn’t think I could talk to anyone I knew. I thought it would
                                                                  ✪        You might find it good to…

                                                                            make a tape of your
 just make things worse. I couldn’t talk to my friends about it             favourite music                                 write things down
                                                                                                     do some drawing
 because I didn’t think they would take it seriously. I just felt                                                           in a diary
                                                                                                     or painting
 completely alone. I wrote to a problem page and they encouraged
 me to phone a helpline. Once I did that they helped me have more          write a poem or song
                                                                                                           listen to some music
                                                                                                                                        ✪
                                                                 ✪
 confidence to get help.’

                           ✪                                               These things may help you understand how you feel.
                                                                                                                                         ☛
page   10                                  ✪                                 ✪                                      ✪          page     11
 There are lots of other things which might help you feel            Ta l k t o s o m e o n e
 better, at least for some of the time.
                                                                     Talking to someone might help you feel more able to cope. Try
 The important thing is to do something that you enjoy.
                                                                     and talk to someone you like and trust. This might be a…
 Here are just some ideas...
                                                                     ✩ friend               ✩ brother or sister     ✩ grandparent


                                                           ✪
                                                                     ✩ parent or carer      ✩ aunt or uncle         ✩ friend’s parent
       watch something              get outside in
       you enjoy on TV             the fresh air                     Other people you could talk to could be a...

                                                                     ✩ teacher              ✩ school counsellor     ✩ social worker
                                                                     ✩ school nurse         ✩ youth worker
  try a sport like swimming or         eat regularly and
  jogging or dancing – even just       as healthily as you can       They may be able to come with you to talk to someone else or

                                   ✪                             ✪
  go for a walk
                                                                     may be able to phone someone for advice if you don’t want to
                                                                     do it yourself. They may be able to help and reassure you that
                                                                     they sometimes feel the same way.
                                                                                                                                      ☛
page   12                                                                 ✪                              ✪                          page    13
 Even if you can’t control what is making you feel unhappy – for    will be confidential – that is, they will not tell anyone what you
 example, if adults close to you are always arguing, or if          tell them. But if your health or safety is at serious risk then
 someone you know is unwell – it’s still important to get help.     your doctor may want to tell your parent or carer. You may want
                                                                    to speak to your doctor first about this and explain that you
 If you speak to a t e a c h e r they can listen and may give you   want what you say to be confidential.
 some advice. If you want, they can speak to someone to try and
 help sort things out or arrange for you to see a school            If you speak to a counsellor or therapist, or someone who is a
 counsellor. Maybe you have a school counsellor you can see         specialist in young people’s difficulties, they will be very sympathetic.
 without talking to the teacher.                                    They will give you the time to think about what you are going through.
                                                                    They are trained and used to talking to people who have all sorts of
 If you speak to a d o c t o r they should be sympathetic, listen   worries. They will respect confidentiality and, if you agree, they may
 and offer you some advice. Sometimes doctors prescribe             offer to meet you, together with other people who matter to you.
 tablets, which can be helpful if you are feeling very depressed.   You can also find out about places where young people can go for help
 They can also refer you to a specialist who is trained to help     through Youth Access (address is at the end of this booklet).


                                                                                                                                         ☛
 young people with problems. What you talk to the doctor about      If you are nervous you can always take a friend with you.
page        14
                     ✪                                 The Line
                                                   Freepost NATN 1111
                                                      London E1 6BR
                                                                           ✆                       Carers UK
                                                                                                     EC1A 4JT
                                                                                                  Carers helpline:
                                                                                                                                        Get Connected
                                                                                                                                    Freephone: 0808 808 4994
                                                                                                                                 (7 days a week, 1.00pm-11.00pm)
                                                                                                                                                                                        Cruse
                                                                                                                                                                                  Bereavement Care
                                                                                                                                                                          Cruse Youth Helpline for young people
                                                                                                                                                                                aged 12-18: 0808 808 1677
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          page
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Careline
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     15
                                                                                           0808 808 7777 (Wed & Thurs                         Email:

   Help section                                Freephone: 0800 88 44 44
                                               (Mon - Fri, 3.30pm-9.30pm.
                                                                                               10am–12pm; 2pm–4pm)
                                                                                             Email: info@ukcarers.org
                                                                                                                                  helpline@getconnected.org.uk
                                                                                                                                     www.getconnected.org.uk
                                                                                                                                                                                   (Mon-Fri, 9.30am-5pm)
                                                                                                                                                                           Day by Day Helpline: 0870 167 1677
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Counselling line:
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 020 8514 1177
                                               Weekends, 2.00pm-8.00pm)                       www.carersonline.org.uk            Finds young people the best help                  (Mon-Fri, 9.30am-5pm)                   (Mon–Fri, 10.00am–1.00pm
               ChildLine                    Provides free confidential advice,            Provides advice and information             whatever the problem.            Email: helpline@crusebereavementcare.org.uk            and 7.00pm–10.00pm)
           Freepost NATN 1111                   counselling and support to                    for people who care for                Connects young people to                www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk             Email: careline@totalise.co.uk
               London E1 6BR                      young people with any                          partners, relatives                  organisations that can                  Youth website: www.rd4u.org.uk        Confidential crisis telephone counselling
     Freephone: 0800 1111 (24 hours)              problem who are living                             or friends.                            help them.                      Offers counselling, information and      for children, young people and adults.




                                                                                                                      ✪✆
        Textphone: 0800 400 222                         away from                                                                                                              advice to anyone who has been           Careline can refer callers to other
         (Mon-Fri 9.30am-9.30pm.                           home.                                                                                                                  bereaved and those who                   organisations and support



                                                ✪
          Weekends 9.30am-8pm)                                                                                                                     Frank                               care for them.                          groups throughout
                                                                                            NSPCC Child
             www.childline.co.uk                                                                                                          Call free and confidentially on:                              Youth   Access            the country.
ChildLine is the free, confidential 24 hour                                              Protection Helpline                                      0800 77 66 00                                          1-2 Taylors Yard
  helpline for children and young people                                           Freephone: 0808 800 5000 (24 hours)
                                                                                                                                       (24 hour service. If you call from a                            67 Alderbrook Road
   concerned about any problem. Lines                                              Textphone: 0800 056 0566 (24 hours)
                                                                                                                                     landline the call is free and won’t show                           London SW12 8AD
     can be busy, but please keep on                  Sexwise                         Asian Freephone: 0808 096 7719
                                                                                                                                  up on your phone bill. Also provides language               Signposting Service: 020 8772 9900
             trying and you will             Freephone: 0800 28 29 30                       (Mon–Fri 11am–7pm)                  interpreting service for non-English speakers.)            (Mon-Fri, 9.00am-1.00pm and 2.00-5.00pm)
                get through.                (Mon-Sun, 7.00am-Midnight)           CYMRU/Wales Freephone: 0808 100 2524                Textphone: 0800 917 8765 (24 hours)                        Email: admin@youthaccess.org.uk
                                             Textphone: 0800 328 1651                       (Mon-Fri 10am-6pm)
                                                                                                                                          Email: frank@talktofrank.com                               www.youthaccess.org.uk
                                            (Mon-Sun, 7.00am-Midnight)                    Email: help@nspcc.org.uk
                                                                                                                                                www.talktofrank.com                       A national membership organisation for youth
                                                 www.ruthinking.co.uk                         www.nspcc.org.uk



✪
                                                                                                                                    Confidential information and advice for               information, advice and counselling agencies.




                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            ✪
                                              Sexwise offers free and            A confidential service offering counselling,                                                                Provides information on youth agencies
                                                                                                                                        anyone concerned about their own
                                              confidential advice about             information and advice for children,
                                                                                                                                            or someone else’s drug or                            to children and their carers but
                                                sex, relationships and                    young people and families
                                                                                                                                                  solvent misuse.                                        does not provide
                                                   contraception.                                  in need.
                                                                                                                                                                                                           direct advice.
To obtain further copies of this booklet, contact the YoungMinds Order Line on
0870 870 1721. This booklet (ref B01) was reprinted in 2004. © YoungMinds 2003.




YoungMinds, 102-108 Clerkenwell Rd, London EC1M 5SA. Tel: 020 7336 8445, Parents Information Service: 0800 018 2138
(freephone supplied by MCI WorldCom); www.youngminds.org.uk Email: enquiries@youngminds.org.uk Reg charity no. 1016968

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Depression Bklt Aug 03

  • 1. do you ever feel depressed? A YoungMinds Booklet
  • 2. page 2 ✪ ✪ ✪ ✪ ✪ page 3 We a l l h a v e t o d e a l w i t h d i f f e r e n t k i n d s For a small number of people, feeling down or depressed can go on for a long time so they can’t get on with their everyday lives. of feelings and emotions But if you’re feeling down or depressed in any way, then this ✪ d booklet is for you. c ite Sometimes we feel h a p p y and e x Why do I feel like this? At other times, we’ll feel s a d and d o ‘Mum walked out on me and my brother, and dad got a job in wn another part of the country so we had to move. Mum didn’t want to see us any more, because she said she had a new life. There are plenty of things that might make you worry. But Dad started drinking. It’s like I lost everything I knew.’ people feel and react to different things in different ways. It’s normal to feel stressed, anxious or lonely from time to time, or There are lots of things that can make you feel down or depressed. ✪ ☛ that no-one understands us. But for most people, these feelings come and go. Over the page are just some examples...
  • 3. page 4 if someone close to you is ill, or dies worrying about how you look ✪ page 5 worrying about feeling guilty or responsible for someone else’s behaviour your sexuality feeling left out How do I know if I’m feeling depressed? and not being part of a group ‘ I couldn’t concentrate on my work. I was always daydreaming, and moving or leaving home feeling useless wanted to sleep a lot. I couldn't be bothered to do anything. and worthless arguing with Sometimes when I felt really low it was scary, and I’d start messing having a parent or friends or family about at school, getting into trouble. Anything not to feel like that...’ carer who is changes in your family depressed or worried or becoming part of a It’s ok not to feel positive or happy all the time. It’s always good thinking things will about other things new family to talk to someone about how you feel to understand more and never get better ✪ feel more in charge. If you feel like harming yourself it’s having trouble with worrying about exams important to get help. your boyfriend or or getting disappointing being bullied at girlfriend, or even results school or elsewhere If it is hard to talk to someone you know, there are a lot of just a close friend places that offer advice and help. Some organisations are listed feeling you have at the end of this booklet. if you have ☛ if someone close to no-one to talk to and that been abused you moves away no-one understands you
  • 4. page 6 page 7 People show they are unhappy in different ways... ✪ Wa y s t o h e l p a f r i e n d i f t h e y ’ r e u n h a p p y lying or making up stories feeling life is not worth living ✪ worrying about things ✪ or feeling depressed ✪ listen and try to be sympathetic eating a lot more or a lot being moody or not wanting less than usual irritable or snappy ✪ don’t expect them just to snap out of it to go out ✪ don’t criticise or tease them ✪ having trouble sleeping crying a lot feeling like harming yourself ✪ try and get them to talk about how they feel or having bad dreams ✪ be patient and allow them time to talk feeling no-one likes you stealing things or feeling lazy or bored or people are talking ✪ try and help them look for help getting into trouble and tired a lot behind your back Maybe you recognise some of these in yourself or in a friend? ☛
  • 5. page 8 ✪ ✪ page 9 Wa y s t o h e l p y o u r s e l f It’s important that anyone who feels depressed finds ways to cope. There are often good reasons why you feel down. So if you’re ’After I felt depressed a few times I knew I’d always come out of feeling depressed, don’t be afraid and don’t panic. it, and just tried to do things to distract myself till it passed. That helped a bit. It was horrible thinking it might come back though. And always remember, feeling sad and unhappy will come to an ✪ In the end I went for counselling, which helped me feel more in end, even if you sometimes find it hard to imagine. control of my life.’ ‘I didn’t think I could talk to anyone I knew. I thought it would ✪ You might find it good to… make a tape of your just make things worse. I couldn’t talk to my friends about it favourite music write things down do some drawing because I didn’t think they would take it seriously. I just felt in a diary or painting completely alone. I wrote to a problem page and they encouraged me to phone a helpline. Once I did that they helped me have more write a poem or song listen to some music ✪ ✪ confidence to get help.’ ✪ These things may help you understand how you feel. ☛
  • 6. page 10 ✪ ✪ ✪ page 11 There are lots of other things which might help you feel Ta l k t o s o m e o n e better, at least for some of the time. Talking to someone might help you feel more able to cope. Try The important thing is to do something that you enjoy. and talk to someone you like and trust. This might be a… Here are just some ideas... ✩ friend ✩ brother or sister ✩ grandparent ✪ ✩ parent or carer ✩ aunt or uncle ✩ friend’s parent watch something get outside in you enjoy on TV the fresh air Other people you could talk to could be a... ✩ teacher ✩ school counsellor ✩ social worker ✩ school nurse ✩ youth worker try a sport like swimming or eat regularly and jogging or dancing – even just as healthily as you can They may be able to come with you to talk to someone else or ✪ ✪ go for a walk may be able to phone someone for advice if you don’t want to do it yourself. They may be able to help and reassure you that they sometimes feel the same way. ☛
  • 7. page 12 ✪ ✪ page 13 Even if you can’t control what is making you feel unhappy – for will be confidential – that is, they will not tell anyone what you example, if adults close to you are always arguing, or if tell them. But if your health or safety is at serious risk then someone you know is unwell – it’s still important to get help. your doctor may want to tell your parent or carer. You may want to speak to your doctor first about this and explain that you If you speak to a t e a c h e r they can listen and may give you want what you say to be confidential. some advice. If you want, they can speak to someone to try and help sort things out or arrange for you to see a school If you speak to a counsellor or therapist, or someone who is a counsellor. Maybe you have a school counsellor you can see specialist in young people’s difficulties, they will be very sympathetic. without talking to the teacher. They will give you the time to think about what you are going through. They are trained and used to talking to people who have all sorts of If you speak to a d o c t o r they should be sympathetic, listen worries. They will respect confidentiality and, if you agree, they may and offer you some advice. Sometimes doctors prescribe offer to meet you, together with other people who matter to you. tablets, which can be helpful if you are feeling very depressed. You can also find out about places where young people can go for help They can also refer you to a specialist who is trained to help through Youth Access (address is at the end of this booklet). ☛ young people with problems. What you talk to the doctor about If you are nervous you can always take a friend with you.
  • 8. page 14 ✪ The Line Freepost NATN 1111 London E1 6BR ✆ Carers UK EC1A 4JT Carers helpline: Get Connected Freephone: 0808 808 4994 (7 days a week, 1.00pm-11.00pm) Cruse Bereavement Care Cruse Youth Helpline for young people aged 12-18: 0808 808 1677 page Careline 15 0808 808 7777 (Wed & Thurs Email: Help section Freephone: 0800 88 44 44 (Mon - Fri, 3.30pm-9.30pm. 10am–12pm; 2pm–4pm) Email: info@ukcarers.org helpline@getconnected.org.uk www.getconnected.org.uk (Mon-Fri, 9.30am-5pm) Day by Day Helpline: 0870 167 1677 Counselling line: 020 8514 1177 Weekends, 2.00pm-8.00pm) www.carersonline.org.uk Finds young people the best help (Mon-Fri, 9.30am-5pm) (Mon–Fri, 10.00am–1.00pm ChildLine Provides free confidential advice, Provides advice and information whatever the problem. Email: helpline@crusebereavementcare.org.uk and 7.00pm–10.00pm) Freepost NATN 1111 counselling and support to for people who care for Connects young people to www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk Email: careline@totalise.co.uk London E1 6BR young people with any partners, relatives organisations that can Youth website: www.rd4u.org.uk Confidential crisis telephone counselling Freephone: 0800 1111 (24 hours) problem who are living or friends. help them. Offers counselling, information and for children, young people and adults. ✪✆ Textphone: 0800 400 222 away from advice to anyone who has been Careline can refer callers to other (Mon-Fri 9.30am-9.30pm. home. bereaved and those who organisations and support ✪ Weekends 9.30am-8pm) Frank care for them. groups throughout NSPCC Child www.childline.co.uk Call free and confidentially on: Youth Access the country. ChildLine is the free, confidential 24 hour Protection Helpline 0800 77 66 00 1-2 Taylors Yard helpline for children and young people Freephone: 0808 800 5000 (24 hours) (24 hour service. If you call from a 67 Alderbrook Road concerned about any problem. Lines Textphone: 0800 056 0566 (24 hours) landline the call is free and won’t show London SW12 8AD can be busy, but please keep on Sexwise Asian Freephone: 0808 096 7719 up on your phone bill. Also provides language Signposting Service: 020 8772 9900 trying and you will Freephone: 0800 28 29 30 (Mon–Fri 11am–7pm) interpreting service for non-English speakers.) (Mon-Fri, 9.00am-1.00pm and 2.00-5.00pm) get through. (Mon-Sun, 7.00am-Midnight) CYMRU/Wales Freephone: 0808 100 2524 Textphone: 0800 917 8765 (24 hours) Email: admin@youthaccess.org.uk Textphone: 0800 328 1651 (Mon-Fri 10am-6pm) Email: frank@talktofrank.com www.youthaccess.org.uk (Mon-Sun, 7.00am-Midnight) Email: help@nspcc.org.uk www.talktofrank.com A national membership organisation for youth www.ruthinking.co.uk www.nspcc.org.uk ✪ Confidential information and advice for information, advice and counselling agencies. ✪ Sexwise offers free and A confidential service offering counselling, Provides information on youth agencies anyone concerned about their own confidential advice about information and advice for children, or someone else’s drug or to children and their carers but sex, relationships and young people and families solvent misuse. does not provide contraception. in need. direct advice.
  • 9. To obtain further copies of this booklet, contact the YoungMinds Order Line on 0870 870 1721. This booklet (ref B01) was reprinted in 2004. © YoungMinds 2003. YoungMinds, 102-108 Clerkenwell Rd, London EC1M 5SA. Tel: 020 7336 8445, Parents Information Service: 0800 018 2138 (freephone supplied by MCI WorldCom); www.youngminds.org.uk Email: enquiries@youngminds.org.uk Reg charity no. 1016968