A man threatened to melt a kettle after it emptied itself on him. The kettle then attacked the man and a passerby who tried to help. It kicked the passerby into the sky, causing him to land headfirst on an egg tree and smash all the eggs. A policeman shot and killed the kettle, but its head was thrown into space and crashed into Mars, causing Mars to crash through the universe. The kettle's head was then swallowed by another planet.

1. KETTLE NEWS
One day a man had just put on the kettle when it suddenly jumped up and emptied
itself all over the man. The man said:
“You!” just you wait kettle fiend I’ll melt you to mince bread.”
The kettle got its wild up and filled itself up and lunged itself at the man. He ran out
like a shot and had to summon a passer - by for help. The passer – by grabbed hold
of the kettle pest but it was too big for its boots. It then grabbed the passer – by,
kicked him up into the sky and he landed headfirst onto an egg tree and all the eggs
smashed.
Meanwhile, down below the mad kettle was trying to shin up the egg tree to attack
the man but got shot dead by a passing policeman. Although the kettle was dead that
didn’t however stop it from trying to climb the egg tree, when all of a sudden one of
the branches grabbed hold of his head and pulled it off. The head got chucked up
into outer space and rammed Mars causing it to crash down the Universe. It then
got swallowed up by another planet.
The man’s head, the murderer behind Mars’ death was grabbed by Jupiter’s son
and knocked all the way the Diblicorsoy, another planet in the Universe.
The passer – by whose head got pulled off by the egg tree’s branch grew a new head.