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DEAR BASTARD.
Written by
Zachary Retort
2611 Winchester Drive
(412) 327 - 7341
FADE IN:
EXT. A FRONT YARD - LATE MORNING - CONTINUOUS
NELSON BOYLE (27) a fat man, who is dressed in a coffee
stained undershirt, sleep pants, and dirty old tennis shoes.
He throws a baseball towards his son, CAM (6). Cam catches,
then drops the ball.
NELSON
(smiling)
It’s alright, buddy. Throw it back
to me.
Cam picks up the baseball. He throws it. The ball goes way
left of Nelson. Nelson, runs over to the ball, he icks it up.
NELSON (CONT’D)
(excitedly)
Nice throw.
Nelson throws the ball. Cam catches, then drops the ball. He
dejectedly hangs his head down.
NELSON (CONT’D)
It’s alright.
Cam continues to hang his head down. Nelson walks over to
Cam. He squats down and puts his hand on Cam's shoulder. Cam
doesn't look up at him.
NELSON (CONT’D)
Let’s try something else.
Nelson stands up, runs toward the front door of his house.
A beat.
Nelson returns with a battered, white soccer ball. He puts
the soccer ball on the ground.
NELSON (CONT’D)
Get ready.
Cam lifts his head up.
Nelson is about to kick the soccer ball, when PATTI, Nelson’s
wife (26) a slender blonde, who is nicely dressed, appears
outside the front door.
PATTI
Nelson, why aren’t you dressed for
your father’s funeral?
Nelson turns around and faces Patti.
NELSON
I’m not going.
PATTI
You will regret it if you don’t go.
NELSON
I will regret it, if I do go.
Patti, is about to say something, but then a car appears.
Patti and Nelson turn to look at the car.
PATTI
It’s Rodger. He is here to pick us
up for the funeral.
Patti turns to Cam.
PATTI (CONT’D)
Cam!
Cam turns towards the direction of his mother.
PATTI (CONT’D)
Go inside and get dressed.
Cam looks at Nelson.
NELSON
(to Cam)
Do as your mom says!
Cam complies. He goes into the house. Patti follows after
Cam.
A car door opens. RODGER (21) steps out. He is also nicely
dressed.
Nelson walks towards Rodger.
They embrace.
RODGER
(to Nelson)
Why aren’t you dressed? The funeral
is in a half an hour!
NELSON
I’m not going.
2.
RODGER
He was our father.
NELSON
He wasn’t a father to me.
RODGER
How can you say that?!
NELSON
Easy, I have a good memory.
RODGER
You know dad sobered up, right?
NELSON
(mockingly)
Really!? Was that before or after
the second heart attack?
RODGER
(hesitates)
Before.
NELSON
So he had a moment of clarity.
Fucking a.
RODGER
He apologized to me and I forgave
him.
NELSON
He never apologized to me. So, I
can’t forgive him and I never will.
A DOOR SLAMS from behind Nelson and Rodger. They both turn
towards the sound. Patti stands by the front door.
RODGER
Will you go, at least for me?
Nelson looks at Rodger.
NELSON
(bitterly)
Sure.
RODGER
(quietly)
Thanks.
Nelson walks away from Rodger. He walks to the front door.
Patti meets Nelson.
3.
They smile at each other.
Nelson goes into the house.
Patti walks down to Rodger’s car. She meets Rodger.
PATTI
Hey Rodger.
RODGER
Hi Patti.
Patti reaches into the front seat of Rodger’s car and takes
out a cigarette and a lighter. She comes out of the car.
She lights the cigarette. She inhales.
RODGER (CONT’D)
I don’t get it. It’s just a
funeral. It’s not like he has to
give a eulogy.
She exhales. She looks up at the sky.
PATTI
The weather is changing.
RODGER
It’s summer.
PATTI
It’s quite beautiful.
She continues to smoke.
Nelson and Cam, come out of the house. They are nicely
dressed. They walk towards Rodger’s car. They get in.
INT. BACK OF CHURCH - AFTERNOON - CONTINUOUS
Nelson and Rodger stand in the back of the church. People
come up to Rodger and Nelson.
PERSON 1
(solemnly)
James was taken too soon. Forty-
eight is too early of an age.
PERSON 2
(stoically)
Your father was a saint.
4.
PERSON 3
(with great sadness)
A wonderful man has died.
The crowd dies down.
NELSON
Christ, any more praises?
RODGER
(lightly laughing)
Not for awhile. Is mom coming?
NELSON
Nope. She sent me a text this
morning. She said and I quote ‘I
don’t want to see that bastard in
this life, or the next.’ I couldn’t
blame her for not coming.
RODGER
Time heals, but for some it
doesn’t.
Rodger and Nelson’s AUNT VERA, 55, walks up to Nelson and
Rodger. She looks down at her program before she speaks.
AUNT VERA
I don’t see anything about
Scriptures or eulogies. Are you two
going to read for your dad?
RODGER
(quickly)
Yes we are. We are also both giving
eulogies, too.
Nelson turns. He gives Rodger an evil look.
AUNT VERA
Oh, what Scripture are you reading
Rodger?
RODGER
Isaiah 57:1-2
AUNT VERA
A very nice passage. What about you
Nelson?
Nelson is about to speak--
5.
RODGER
(quickly)
Psalm 34:14.
AUNT VERA
A wonderful verse.
NELSON
(blankly)
Thanks.
Aunt Vera leaves.
Nelson turns to Rodger.
Rodger meets Nelson’s gaze.
RODGER
(calmly)
Just do it. It may not fill the
void, but--
NELSON
--But that’s it, I’m not going to
feel any better after doing it.
Rodger is about to say something, when Patti shows up.
NELSON (CONT’D)
Where’s Cam?
PATTI
With your aunt. What aren’t you
doing?
NELSON
Rodger signed me up to read a
Scripture passage, and to also give
a eulogy about my dad.
RODGER
Patti, tell your husband, that this
isn’t that big of a deal.
Patti gives Nelson a dirty look.
NELSON
(rolls eyes)
Says you. You love the man. I am
glad he’s fucking dead. That’s my
eulogy.
Nelson turns away from Rodger and storms off. Rodger turns to
Patti.
6.
RODGER
Will you go talk some sense into
him?
PATTI
What an asshole you are.
RODGER
Thanks.
EXT. BEHIND CHURCH - AFTERNOON - CONTINUOUS
Patti follows Nelson until they both reach a side door of
the church. Patti and Nelson walk out the door.
PATTI
Nelson!
Nelson turns around to face Patti.
NELSON
You can’t convince me--
PATTI
--I’m not going to try to.
NELSON
I don’t want to do it. I just can’t
honor a man, who--
PATTI
--You can’t keep going on this way.
NELSON
(hangs head)
You’re right.
Patti puts her arms around him.
Nelson keeps his arms to his sides.
PATTI
Do you remember when we found out
that I was pregnant?
NELSON
(lifting up his head)
Yeah.
PATTI
I hated the fact that I was
pregnant. You were just kicked out
of school, unemployed. I lived at
home, a shit job--
7.
NELSON
(annoyed)
--Your point being.
Patti doesn’t change expression.
PATTI
What I’m saying is that it was a
rough time, and we got through it.
NELSON
I don’t know if I will get through--
PATTI
--You will.
(pause)
We will.
He tries to leave.
She remains STUCK on him.
NELSON
If this is adulthood--
PATTI
(smiling)
Adulthood is nothing more than
blah, blah, blah.
(pause)
Do you have a passage ready?
NELSON
“For now we see through a glass,
darkly; but then face to face: now
I know in part; but then shall I
know even as I am known.”
They stop.
NELSON (CONT’D)
I can’t go in there.
PATTI
He’s nothing but molecules now.
Patti firmly grabs Nelson’s hand.
PATTI (CONT’D)
I care about you, about us and Cam.
Nelson looks at Patti’s hand.
8.
NELSON
(angrily)
Why the hell do you care?
Nelson yanks his hand away.
NELSON (CONT’D)
I don’t need either you or Cam. You
two can leave.
PATTI
(hurt)
Go fuck yourself. I’m taking your
son away from you.
Patti takes off.
Nelson remains standing.
INT. CHURCH - AFTERNOON - LATER
A PRIEST, 75, is up at the pulpit, he finishes up his sermon.
His LOUD voice reaches the audience.
PRIEST
--We shall honor the life of James
Corneilus Boyle. Would anyone like
to come up and speak?
We see the audience sit in silence. In the front of the
church, a hand goes up. The hand belongs to Rodger.
PRIEST (CONT’D)
James’s sons are going to come up
now.
Rodger gets up. Rodger taps Nelson. Rodger stoically goes up
to the pulpit. He opens the Bible to the verse. Nelson sits
in a chair behind Rodger.
RODGER
Isaiah 57:1-2. “Good people pass
away; the godly often die before
their time. But no one seems to
care or wonder why...
As Rodger talks, Nelson grows bored and looks over at Patti
and Cam. Nelson centers his attention on Cam. He drifts off.
FLASHBACK:
EXT. JAMES HOUSE - AFTERNOON - JULY 1994
9.
Nelson, (6) playing catch with his father JAMES (27). James
drunkenly throws a baseball at Nelson. The baseball goes over
Nelson's head.
JAMES
(yelling)
GO FUCKING GET IT YOU RETARD!
Nelson doesn’t move.
James throws his baseball glove at Nelson. The glove hits
Nelson. Nelson begins to CRY.
INT. CHURCH ALTER - AFTERNOON - CONTINUOUS
Rodger SLAMS his fist on the pulpit. Nelson COMES to. Rodger
finishes up his eulogy.
RODGER
(crying)
...I hope now that my father is in
the presence of the Lord.
Rodger leaves.
Nelson goes up. He flips through the Bible. He stops, and
looks over at Patti and Cam.
NELSON
This eulogy would have been nothing
but empty talk. I can’t honor my
father. To stand up here, and
eulogize that man; would be a gross
assassination of his character.
Nelson stops, a moment of clarity occurs. He takes one last
look at the crowd, Patti and then Cam.
NELSON (CONT’D)
This whole affair is a crock of
shit.
Nelson walks away from the podium. He makes his way over to
Patti and Cam. He tousles Cam’s hair. He moves in close to
Patti. He whispers into her ear. A shocked expression appears
on Patti’s face.
Patti tightly grabs Nelson’s wrist.
Nelson rips his wrist away from Patti. He walks away from
her, and heads down the aisle.
FADE OUT.
10.

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Dear Bastard (Rewrite)

  • 1. DEAR BASTARD. Written by Zachary Retort 2611 Winchester Drive (412) 327 - 7341
  • 2. FADE IN: EXT. A FRONT YARD - LATE MORNING - CONTINUOUS NELSON BOYLE (27) a fat man, who is dressed in a coffee stained undershirt, sleep pants, and dirty old tennis shoes. He throws a baseball towards his son, CAM (6). Cam catches, then drops the ball. NELSON (smiling) It’s alright, buddy. Throw it back to me. Cam picks up the baseball. He throws it. The ball goes way left of Nelson. Nelson, runs over to the ball, he icks it up. NELSON (CONT’D) (excitedly) Nice throw. Nelson throws the ball. Cam catches, then drops the ball. He dejectedly hangs his head down. NELSON (CONT’D) It’s alright. Cam continues to hang his head down. Nelson walks over to Cam. He squats down and puts his hand on Cam's shoulder. Cam doesn't look up at him. NELSON (CONT’D) Let’s try something else. Nelson stands up, runs toward the front door of his house. A beat. Nelson returns with a battered, white soccer ball. He puts the soccer ball on the ground. NELSON (CONT’D) Get ready. Cam lifts his head up. Nelson is about to kick the soccer ball, when PATTI, Nelson’s wife (26) a slender blonde, who is nicely dressed, appears outside the front door. PATTI Nelson, why aren’t you dressed for your father’s funeral?
  • 3. Nelson turns around and faces Patti. NELSON I’m not going. PATTI You will regret it if you don’t go. NELSON I will regret it, if I do go. Patti, is about to say something, but then a car appears. Patti and Nelson turn to look at the car. PATTI It’s Rodger. He is here to pick us up for the funeral. Patti turns to Cam. PATTI (CONT’D) Cam! Cam turns towards the direction of his mother. PATTI (CONT’D) Go inside and get dressed. Cam looks at Nelson. NELSON (to Cam) Do as your mom says! Cam complies. He goes into the house. Patti follows after Cam. A car door opens. RODGER (21) steps out. He is also nicely dressed. Nelson walks towards Rodger. They embrace. RODGER (to Nelson) Why aren’t you dressed? The funeral is in a half an hour! NELSON I’m not going. 2.
  • 4. RODGER He was our father. NELSON He wasn’t a father to me. RODGER How can you say that?! NELSON Easy, I have a good memory. RODGER You know dad sobered up, right? NELSON (mockingly) Really!? Was that before or after the second heart attack? RODGER (hesitates) Before. NELSON So he had a moment of clarity. Fucking a. RODGER He apologized to me and I forgave him. NELSON He never apologized to me. So, I can’t forgive him and I never will. A DOOR SLAMS from behind Nelson and Rodger. They both turn towards the sound. Patti stands by the front door. RODGER Will you go, at least for me? Nelson looks at Rodger. NELSON (bitterly) Sure. RODGER (quietly) Thanks. Nelson walks away from Rodger. He walks to the front door. Patti meets Nelson. 3.
  • 5. They smile at each other. Nelson goes into the house. Patti walks down to Rodger’s car. She meets Rodger. PATTI Hey Rodger. RODGER Hi Patti. Patti reaches into the front seat of Rodger’s car and takes out a cigarette and a lighter. She comes out of the car. She lights the cigarette. She inhales. RODGER (CONT’D) I don’t get it. It’s just a funeral. It’s not like he has to give a eulogy. She exhales. She looks up at the sky. PATTI The weather is changing. RODGER It’s summer. PATTI It’s quite beautiful. She continues to smoke. Nelson and Cam, come out of the house. They are nicely dressed. They walk towards Rodger’s car. They get in. INT. BACK OF CHURCH - AFTERNOON - CONTINUOUS Nelson and Rodger stand in the back of the church. People come up to Rodger and Nelson. PERSON 1 (solemnly) James was taken too soon. Forty- eight is too early of an age. PERSON 2 (stoically) Your father was a saint. 4.
  • 6. PERSON 3 (with great sadness) A wonderful man has died. The crowd dies down. NELSON Christ, any more praises? RODGER (lightly laughing) Not for awhile. Is mom coming? NELSON Nope. She sent me a text this morning. She said and I quote ‘I don’t want to see that bastard in this life, or the next.’ I couldn’t blame her for not coming. RODGER Time heals, but for some it doesn’t. Rodger and Nelson’s AUNT VERA, 55, walks up to Nelson and Rodger. She looks down at her program before she speaks. AUNT VERA I don’t see anything about Scriptures or eulogies. Are you two going to read for your dad? RODGER (quickly) Yes we are. We are also both giving eulogies, too. Nelson turns. He gives Rodger an evil look. AUNT VERA Oh, what Scripture are you reading Rodger? RODGER Isaiah 57:1-2 AUNT VERA A very nice passage. What about you Nelson? Nelson is about to speak-- 5.
  • 7. RODGER (quickly) Psalm 34:14. AUNT VERA A wonderful verse. NELSON (blankly) Thanks. Aunt Vera leaves. Nelson turns to Rodger. Rodger meets Nelson’s gaze. RODGER (calmly) Just do it. It may not fill the void, but-- NELSON --But that’s it, I’m not going to feel any better after doing it. Rodger is about to say something, when Patti shows up. NELSON (CONT’D) Where’s Cam? PATTI With your aunt. What aren’t you doing? NELSON Rodger signed me up to read a Scripture passage, and to also give a eulogy about my dad. RODGER Patti, tell your husband, that this isn’t that big of a deal. Patti gives Nelson a dirty look. NELSON (rolls eyes) Says you. You love the man. I am glad he’s fucking dead. That’s my eulogy. Nelson turns away from Rodger and storms off. Rodger turns to Patti. 6.
  • 8. RODGER Will you go talk some sense into him? PATTI What an asshole you are. RODGER Thanks. EXT. BEHIND CHURCH - AFTERNOON - CONTINUOUS Patti follows Nelson until they both reach a side door of the church. Patti and Nelson walk out the door. PATTI Nelson! Nelson turns around to face Patti. NELSON You can’t convince me-- PATTI --I’m not going to try to. NELSON I don’t want to do it. I just can’t honor a man, who-- PATTI --You can’t keep going on this way. NELSON (hangs head) You’re right. Patti puts her arms around him. Nelson keeps his arms to his sides. PATTI Do you remember when we found out that I was pregnant? NELSON (lifting up his head) Yeah. PATTI I hated the fact that I was pregnant. You were just kicked out of school, unemployed. I lived at home, a shit job-- 7.
  • 9. NELSON (annoyed) --Your point being. Patti doesn’t change expression. PATTI What I’m saying is that it was a rough time, and we got through it. NELSON I don’t know if I will get through-- PATTI --You will. (pause) We will. He tries to leave. She remains STUCK on him. NELSON If this is adulthood-- PATTI (smiling) Adulthood is nothing more than blah, blah, blah. (pause) Do you have a passage ready? NELSON “For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as I am known.” They stop. NELSON (CONT’D) I can’t go in there. PATTI He’s nothing but molecules now. Patti firmly grabs Nelson’s hand. PATTI (CONT’D) I care about you, about us and Cam. Nelson looks at Patti’s hand. 8.
  • 10. NELSON (angrily) Why the hell do you care? Nelson yanks his hand away. NELSON (CONT’D) I don’t need either you or Cam. You two can leave. PATTI (hurt) Go fuck yourself. I’m taking your son away from you. Patti takes off. Nelson remains standing. INT. CHURCH - AFTERNOON - LATER A PRIEST, 75, is up at the pulpit, he finishes up his sermon. His LOUD voice reaches the audience. PRIEST --We shall honor the life of James Corneilus Boyle. Would anyone like to come up and speak? We see the audience sit in silence. In the front of the church, a hand goes up. The hand belongs to Rodger. PRIEST (CONT’D) James’s sons are going to come up now. Rodger gets up. Rodger taps Nelson. Rodger stoically goes up to the pulpit. He opens the Bible to the verse. Nelson sits in a chair behind Rodger. RODGER Isaiah 57:1-2. “Good people pass away; the godly often die before their time. But no one seems to care or wonder why... As Rodger talks, Nelson grows bored and looks over at Patti and Cam. Nelson centers his attention on Cam. He drifts off. FLASHBACK: EXT. JAMES HOUSE - AFTERNOON - JULY 1994 9.
  • 11. Nelson, (6) playing catch with his father JAMES (27). James drunkenly throws a baseball at Nelson. The baseball goes over Nelson's head. JAMES (yelling) GO FUCKING GET IT YOU RETARD! Nelson doesn’t move. James throws his baseball glove at Nelson. The glove hits Nelson. Nelson begins to CRY. INT. CHURCH ALTER - AFTERNOON - CONTINUOUS Rodger SLAMS his fist on the pulpit. Nelson COMES to. Rodger finishes up his eulogy. RODGER (crying) ...I hope now that my father is in the presence of the Lord. Rodger leaves. Nelson goes up. He flips through the Bible. He stops, and looks over at Patti and Cam. NELSON This eulogy would have been nothing but empty talk. I can’t honor my father. To stand up here, and eulogize that man; would be a gross assassination of his character. Nelson stops, a moment of clarity occurs. He takes one last look at the crowd, Patti and then Cam. NELSON (CONT’D) This whole affair is a crock of shit. Nelson walks away from the podium. He makes his way over to Patti and Cam. He tousles Cam’s hair. He moves in close to Patti. He whispers into her ear. A shocked expression appears on Patti’s face. Patti tightly grabs Nelson’s wrist. Nelson rips his wrist away from Patti. He walks away from her, and heads down the aisle. FADE OUT. 10.