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08 6462 1999 | www.morgans.com.au/perth
Level 20, 140 St Georges Tce Perth WA 6000
Les Conceicao
(MBA MIR BA Grad Dip FP FFin AFP)
Senior Financial Adviser
Authorised Representative
296710
GESB Award Winning Financial Adviser
Les has over 14 years experience as a
licensed financial adviser with over 5 years as
a Senior Financial Adviser with GESB Financial
Advice and is a multiple award winner of the
GESB Financial Adviser of the Year.
Les has specialised knowledge to create
tailored tax-effective strategies to maximise
your benefits from:
GESB West State Super
GESB Gold State Super
Additionally, Morgans offers the Wealth+SMSF
Solution service which frees up your time by
taking care of the establishment and complete
administration of a SMSF. We also offer
top class equities and securities research,
enabling comprehensive management of your
SMSF portfolio.
To make an appointment or discuss your
needs, please call Les on 08 6462 1960.
Morgans and CIMB – Please visit www.morgans.com.au to understand the products and services within our alliance.
RBS Morgans Limited ABN 49 010 669 726 AFSL 235410 A Participant of ASX Group. A Professional Partner of the Financial Planning Association of Australia
E
ver since reading Douglas
Adam’s So Long and
Thanks for All the Fish, I’ve
been acutely aware that the skills
I possess would be of no use to
mankind in either establishing
an outpost on another planet or
surviving on a post-apocalyptic
Earth. When giant cockroaches
are stalking the streets or you’re
trying to figure out how to make
your lungs run on methane,
the person you need around
isn’t someone who can create a
good marketing pitch or put a
well-turned phrase in a wedding
ceremony.
I can’t build a generator out
of old bean tins or sew even a
rudimentary spacesuit. My practical survival
skills are limited to cooking things that come
vacuum-packed from Coles, making me
roughly as useful to the future of humanity as
mime artists.
This, I suspect is a major reason why people
like to hang out in couples. Nature makes us
attracted to people with complementary skill
sets, so that when the bug-eyed monsters are
bearing down on you, at least one person
will be able to fashion a laser gun from their
spectacle case and ensure the survival of the
species. For me, unless there’s an app for that,
I’m dead meat.
Single Woman’s Survival Guide
Laugh Lines
In the absence of an alien invasion, the time
that we become most keenly aware of our
lack of skills is when we cease to be part of
a couple.
The Government is putting in money to
persuade people to have pre-marriage
relationship counselling, which is a good
idea, but a tough sell. It seems a bit like
inviting the funeral directors to your
50th birthday party just to save time later.
Divorce Training Workshops would be more
practical and save millions on Emergency
Department admissions.
Many women for instance need
training in basic DIY. Money
is often tight and with a new
found spirit of independence,
we set about jobs with way more
enthusiasm than aptitude. These
may even involve power tools. An
early attempt to put up a curtain
rail left my wall looking like it
had been attacked by a myopic
woodpecker tripping on LSD.
I have also emerged victorious
from a pile of flat-pack boxes with
a clumsily constructed chest of
drawers and flesh wounds.
As a secondary benefit, Divorce
Training Workshops would also
provide a great forum for bartering
your skills. It would be possible to
trade a bathtub spider removal for
a meal that didn’t taste like it had been stored
for a month in a wrestler’s armpit. In the
process, this would also save people from the
risks of dating potential new partners just to
get their domestic needs met.
While they’ve yet to invent the set of shelves
that would make dating Kyle Sandilands
seem like a good idea, many an otherwise
sensible girl’s head has been turned by
notions of a re-planked verandah.
Divorce Training Workshops will ensure the
survival of the species – even for those who
are really bad at relationships. It just needs
someone to write the marketing pitch.
Is bartering our gender skills the way of relationships in the future?
If so, will a hot meal pay for pool maintenance?
By Ms Wendy
Wardell