2. I'm never wrong. I once
thought I was wrong,
turns out, I was mistaken.
3. It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that
you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
4. There are three types of people in this
world: those who make things happen,
those who watch things happen and
those who wonder what happened.
- Mary Kay Ash
5. Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poke me in the
ribs and cackle, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after
I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
6. So... the elephant says to the camel "why do you have 2 boobs on
your back?" the camel replies "that's a pretty stupid question
coming from someone who has a dick on his face"
7. What do I do when I see
someone EXTREMELY
GORGEOUS? I STARE,
I SMILE, AND WHEN I
GET TIRED...I PUT THE
MIRROR DOWN!!!
- GAURAV SIDANA
8. When life gives you lemons, make
orange juice and leave the world
wondering how the hell you did it.
9. "Before I criticize someone, I walk a mile in
their shoes. That way, if they get angry,
they are a mile away and barefoot."
10. There are two words gays
hate: Don't and Stop...Unless
those words are spoken
together.
11. Life is a waste of time.
Time is a waste of life. So
let's get wasted and have
the time of our lives!
13. I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect,
therefore I am perfect!
14. I look at the stars and I see you,
I look at the moon and I see you,
I look at the trees and I see you,
Please step aside, you are
blocking my view.
15. But enough about me,
let's talk about you...
What do you think of
me? - Johnny Bravo
16. Don't Do Something Permanently
Stupid, Just Because You Are
Temporarily Upset..
17. it goes in dry,
it comes out wet,
the longer its in,
the better it gets,
when it comes out,
it drips and sags,
.............
stop thinking nasty,
it's a tea bag!
18. My favorite text message:
"I'll be there in 5 minutes..
if not, read this again."
19. Confucius say: to meet girl in
park is good, but to park
meat in girl is better.
20. To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half
empty. To the engineer, the glass
is twice as big as it needs to be.
21. I love everybody. Some I love
to be around, Some I love to
avoid, and others I would
love to punch in the face.
22. Never argue with an idiot.
They'll drag you down to
their level then beat you
with experience!!!
23. Whatever doesn't kill you,
only makes you stronger.
Whatever doesn't kill ME,
had better run like hell!
24. THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
25. I'm one of those people that laughs at a joke 3 TIMES:
>>ONCE when it's told to me
>>ONCE when it's explained to me
>>ONCE 5 minutes later when i finally understand it
26. He who laughs last
thinks slowest!!!
Thank You Very Much
Sompong Yusoontorn
