FeatureCreep Product Roadmap


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2 page sample software roadmap for bored product managers and marketers

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FeatureCreep Product Roadmap

  1. 1. Feature Creep Make the right thing and make the thing right! Product Roadmap 2012 - 2015Product VisionAGILITY VISION STATEMENT• Can leap tall buildings in a single bound• Deploys faster than you can erect a deckchair • To become the leading global provider of <YOUR• Can perform any function simply by re-arranging the PRODUCT CATEGORY HERE> ones and zeros • To achieve greater synergies between <TECHNOLOGYSCALABILITY AND REDUNDANCY NAME 1> and <TECHNOLOGY NAME 2> leading to increasing efficiency at lower cost• Smaller than an ant’s nuts or as big as a whale’s willy – you decide • To leverage <UPCOMING TECHNOLOGY TREND>• Geographic and logical failover – we’ve made it brittle so combined with our expertise in <WHATEVER IT IS we can sell you more of them YOU’VE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST DECADE> to• Runs on any operating system* deliver greater value to ourCOLLABORATION <CUSTOMERS/INVESTORS/EMPLOYEES/CASUAL ACQUAINTANCES/PAROLE OFFICERS>• Facilitate collaboration across teams and locations• Uses fewer muscles than frowning• Individually you can do nothing, but together you can agree that nothing can be doneHEALTHY ABOUT FEATURE CREEP TECHNOLOGY• Naturally low in rat droppings• Can radically increase weight-loss when used as part of a food-free diet Here is Edward Bear coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump• Enriched with poly-gamma-hydro-liposomes, B52 and on the back of his head, behind soluble roughage Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only waySOFT TOILET PAPER of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels there really is • Kind to the bottom another way, if he could just stop • No more bunged up toilets bumping for a moment and think of it. • Manufactured from sustainable forests by nice people www.feature-creep.com* So long as it’s Windows XP, Service Pack 3
  2. 2. Feature Creep Version 2.5 Matter Version 4.1 Transportation Version 3.1 Version 2.6 Fault Tolerance World Peace Microsoft Integration Version 4.0 Version 3.0 Eternal Life Environmentally Friendly Version 3.2 Time TravelQ1 20012 Q2 2012 Q3 2012 Q4 2012 Q1 2013 Q2 2013 Q3 2013 Q4 2013 Q1 2014 Q2 2014 Q3 2014 Q4 2014 Sept 2012 – Ver 2.5 Sept 2013 – Ver 3.1 Matter Transportation World Peace • Send objects as far as you can carry them • Brings people together • Pulps fruit, and anything else you transport • Agnostic • Powered by room temperature fusion • NATO certified • Doesn’t necessarily kill you • Supports Hebrew, Arabic, Gaelic and Scots Irish • Choice of beige Jan 2013 – Ver 2.6 Jan 2014 – Ver 3.2 Microsoft Integration Time Travel • Comes with a “Microsoft integration” sticker • Travel forward in time to when this product is really going to be available • Installs on Windows XP (but doesn’t run) • Travel backwards in time to get the • Runs on Windows Vista (but doesn’t install) requirements right • Buggers up the registry good and proper • Has the word “SharePoint” in the manual Jul 2014 – Ver 4.0 • I met Steve Ballmer in a hotel lift once Eternal Life • User response times will make you feel that time has stopped Mar 2013 – Ver 3.0 • You’ll pray for death Environmentally Friendly • Reduced greenhouse gas emission Jan 2014 – Ver 4.1 • Lower gamma radiation levels Fault Tolerance • Hardly any asbestos at all • We don’t care if it crashes • Reduced increase in power consumption • Comes with lucky sprig of heather • Edible packaging • Automatically recovers from errors by spontaneously rebooting at random intervals Roadmap commitments are firm for the next release; the schedules and contents for subsequent releases are subject to change. © Feature Creep 2012