1. Devon King
January 30, 2016
English 310
The alien watched from behind the force field as the human rolled down the sandy hill after
hitting himself with the rock. It knew that the human was alive. It knew it was a trap. Looking around
quickly, rolling this way and that, it noticed some rather sharp looking stones along a rocky wall
perpendicular to the force field and plucking them up, cradled them in its tentacle fingers similar to the
earth-style brass knuckles of antiquity he had studied in school as a youngling.
Rolling forward,he stopped at a one-half arm’s breadth from the human. The human did not
move. Suspicious. Its chest did. Alive. He knew it! The sneaky human. They were and are everything
his people had said they were and are. A viral-esque, perpetually breeding, hungry, greedy, selfish,
parasite of a species always spreading everywhere like a cancer to consume and contaminate everything
their hungry little hand-penises touch*.
The alien struck quickly before the human could regain his composure. The spiky rocks sunk
into the soft human flesh at the side of his head, beside his eye, like a hot tsadeiv knife through fresh
krantu. Ripping the stones out just as quickly, blood sprayed out in a geyser of hot red. The human only
twitched at the impact and remained still thereafter. It would not move again. The alien rolled back a few
feet to gather its bearings and was startled slightly when the voice of the “other” who had brought it and
this human here spoke up quickly.
“You havewon! Yourspeciesshallcontinueonintothevoid. Doasyouwishfromhereonuntoyourown end!”
With a flash, the alien disappeared and knew nothing more.
Waking suddenly, it rolled quickly against a wall with a bang. Its body and mind were reeling.
Where was it? When was it? Scanning the area quickly, it realized it was back on its ship. A large

2. concussion rocked the craft. Then another. Rolling to the blast screen at the nose, it peered out in time to
see a large armada of Earth frigates and what looked like every other similar ship in view suddenly
detonate with such force that it left a blinding flash of light and a multitude of massive shock waves in its
wake. Another was coming quickly. The alien planted itself into its pilot’s chair and strapped in quickly
just as the wave hit, slamming into the hull like a mighty fist! The ship was thrown backwards and the
alien’s brain case was jarred from the sudden change in movement, disorienting it. He engaged forward
thrusters to reverse the movement and entered the coordinates for the home base location at the front.
The engines powered up with a slow whine and a roar could be heard building from the rear of
the ship.
“FTL transport initiated!” said an androgynous voice from a hidden speaker somewhere in the
cockpit. “Engaging in 5…..4…..3…..2…..1….” and with a massive lurch, the stars became lines and
everywhere was a vortex of purple light. “Destination reached in five seconds” which when actually
written looks like””.
The ship jerked, slowing, and a massive line of ships greeted him. He applied reverse thrusters
coming to a stop as three large fighters came up to him in a line with guns prepped for firing.
“You are being scanned. Standby” came a voice. “Vriatnghs” came the voice again a moment
later, “ship number 75393934, you are to be boarded and inspected for contraband and unauthorized
personnel. You will comply!” The voice was stern and practically barked out the command.
Flipping a switch which unlocked the external hatch inside the airlock. A large thunk and a hiss
sounded from inside and he swiveled his chair around to face it, the door swinging in and out of the way
just as three large aliens in equally large space suits entered, disintegrator rifles in their tendril fingers.

3. “Do not move. You will comply!”one of the biggeronessaidas itmovedaboutthe cockpit
searchinginanyplace somethingsmall orlarge couldbe hidden. He searchedthe latrine,underthe
sleepingpod,the medical baysandall otherplacesanythingcouldbe concealed.
Turningback to him,the large alienspoke curtly. “Youare clearedfordocking. Follow the
instructionsof the agents!”andall three inspectorsexitedthe shipsealingthe airlockdoorandthe
hatch behindthem.
The shipspulledawayandwere returningtothe armada before himwhenanothervoice
happenedoverthe speakers. “Shipnumber75393934, youare clearedfordockingindockingbay
485685 aboard the CelestialDawn. Welcome home,soldier!” The aliensmiledtohimself.
Punchinginthe coordinatesforthe Celestial DawnintohisNavcomputer,he smiledagainto
himself. The guyswere nevergoingtobelieve this.Never. He’dneverbe able totell. Buthe mightbe
able to write it.Maybe.Andwhata storyit wouldmake.Whata story!
*Penis-feet is a reference to Fallout: New Vegas.It’s a rather funny thing said by an autonomousrobotic
guardian (one of four orfive [I forget, actually, how many there were]) in a place called the Big MT
housed in a facility called The Think Tank.
Penis Feet Youtube