1. CRITICAL THINKING: USE IT OR YOU LOSE IT
By
Team Five Star
Front centre is a table flanked either end by two chairs. Sitting on
the left chair, facing sideways to the audience is MARY. On the
table sits a cordless phone and a glossy magazine.
NARRATOR
It’s a late evening and MARY is in her sitting room, chilling out
after a hard day’s work.
The phone rings. MARY picks up the phone.
MARY
Hello.
CALLER #1
Hi, this is Microsoft security; we have detected a virus on your
computer.
MARY
What?
CALLER #1
This is Microsoft security; we have detected a virus on your
computer, it is urgent that you get this fixed, otherwise your
precious banking, and other, information will be given to hackers,
and international criminals.
MARY
How did you get this number?
CALLER #1
We obtained your telephone number by backtracking your IP address to
our international telephone directories.
MARY
I don’t own a computer
CALLER #1
D’oh...

2. (hangs up)
CALLER #1 departs stage left.
MARY
Hmmm....Anyway, maybe I should just check, just in case.
MARY reaches to the side of the chair (opposite audience) and picks
up her laptop.
MARY
I suppose I might as well run a virus check.
Some clicking of keys, and pause for a few seconds.
MARY
I thought as much, no virus, must be a scam.
Her laptop is still on her lap. The phone rings again. MARY picks up
the phone.
MARY
Hello.
CALLER #2
Howya, this is Mick O’Reilly, I’m running for re-election as your
local TD, and I wonder do you have a minute to talk to me?
MARY
No.
CALLER #2
I appreciate you’re very busy, but there are important matters I
need to discuss with you, I want you to know how important you are
to me...
MARY
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, but I’m very busy at the moment, very, very
busy.
MARY types for a few seconds on her laptop.
CALLER #2
...I want you to know how important you are to me, and how much I
care about each and every one of my constituents.

3. MARY
You’re just a liar.
CALLER #2
(stunned)
WH...WHAT ??!??
MARY
Sir. I’m reading you voting record in the Dáil, if you care about me
so much why did you vote for water charges?
CALLER #2
(still a bit stunned)
Well...well, that’s a party matter, I have to vote with my party
otherwise I’d lose the whip.
MARY
And you also voted to cut carers allowances, and special needs
assistants in classrooms.
CALLER #2
(getting back into his patter)
Look, hard choices have to be made, we are facing not just a
national recession, not just a European recession, but a global
recession...we’re in a serious financial crisis...in other words,
there’s no money in the kitty.
MARY
But you did vote to give yourself and your colleagues an 80%
increase......and you have been sanctioned by the Dáil on two
occasions for running a private business while serving as a TD.
CALLER #2
(annoyed)
Jezus, would you every eff off?
(hangs up)
MARY leaves down her laptop on the coffee table, and picks up the
magazine. She starts flicking through the pages, and then pauses on
one page and begins to read aloud.

4. MARY
(reading)
“In a survey 92% of people indicated an improvement after using this
product for seven weeks”
(pauses)
Hmm...I wonder how many people were in that survey?
(pauses)
OK, there’s an asterisk, “percentage based on 32 people sampled”
(pauses)
32 people, but 32 people is hardly statistically significant.
MARY leaves down magazine firmly.
MARY sits back.
Camera pans to TONY
TONY
We are being sold things every day; through scams online, through
politicians, through advertising in newspapers and magazines; we
need to be a bit critical, and worry a little bit, and analyse a
little bit, otherwise we won’t know what’s true and what’s not;
critical thinking, IT’S UP TO YOU.
CURTAIN.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQOWTLmoGh8