This document contains a list of humorous statements from comedian Jeff Foxworthy about working as a teacher. The statements poke fun at the challenges of working with children and students, as well as the long hours and summer breaks that are stereotypically associated with teaching. Many of the statements suggest that teaching can be stressful and tiring, and imply that teachers may need caffeine or vacation time to deal with their jobs.

1. You might have spent too long in classroom Some ideas from Jeff Foxworthy

2. ...if you believe the playground should be equipped with a Ritalin salt lick

3. …if you want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work 8 to 3:30 and have summers off

4. ..if it is difficult to name your own child because there's no name you can come up with that doesn't bring high blood pressure as it is uttered

5. ...if you can tell it's a full moon or if it going to rain, snow, hail....anything!!! Without ever looking outside

6. ...if you believe, "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on a report card!

7. ...if when out in public, you feel the urge to snap your fingers at children you do not know and correct their behavior

8. ...if you think caffeine should be available in intravenous form

9. ...if meeting a child's parent instantly answers the question, "Why is this kid like this?"

10. OR… If any of these made you laugh!