1. “What you do
speaks so loud that
I cannot hear what
you say.”
—Ralph Waldo
Emerson
1
US essayist & poet
(1803 – 1882)
COMMUNICATION
2. Three Elements of Communication
2
93% of
Communication
is Nonverbal
55% is your body language
38% is your voice tone
Only 7% are the actual
words you speak
3. "A significant amount of
communication occurs through
nonverbal language. Though we cannot
see our own, everyone else does. If
you're saying one thing and thinking
another, your nonverbal language may
well give you away." - Gerri King, Ph.D.
3
4. 4
How a person perceives the
information being said can
also depend on interference
involved. If the receiver is
hungry or tired(or a similar
type of interference), they
may interpret the message
incorrectly.
The Two Roles In
Communication
Sender: The person giving the
information
Receiver : The person listening
and interpreting the information
17. 17
SHAKING HANDS IS NOT MEANT TO OVERPOWER
WITH A HEAVY HAND. WE ARE NOT WANTING TO
SHAKE HANDS TOO HARD.
Editor's Notes
What Is Communication? - Communication is defined as a process by which we assign and convey meaning in an attempt to create shared understanding. This process requires a vast repertoire of skills in intrapersonal and interpersonal processing, listening, observing, speaking, questioning, analyzing, and evaluating. Use of these processes is developmental and transfers to all areas of life: home, school, community, work, and beyond. It is through communication that collaboration and cooperation occur.
There are three elements of Communication. The original research to which everyone refers was undertaken in 1971 by Albert Mehrabian (currently Professor Emeritus of Psychology, UCLA). He reached two conclusions:
1 - There are basically three elements in any face-to-face communication: • words • tone of voice and • body language.
2 - These three elements account differently for the meaning of the message: - Words account for 7% - Tone of voice accounts for 38% and - Body language accounts for 55% of the message. Mehrabian reached this second conclusion in the context of experiments dealing with communications of feelings and attitudes. Thus the often quoted disproportionate influence of tone of voice and body language is only really true when someone says they like/dislike something/someone but their tone of voice or body language implies the opposite.
When you move confidently and carry your body confidently, you not only feel more confident but others assume that you are.
People often disguise their true feelings in their utterances: they communicate them freely through their nonverbal communication. When your body language tells a different story from your spoken words, guess which is believed? The answer is your body language. It imparts eight times as much information.
Nonverbal communication is comprised of many components. We communicate through how we talk, our hand movements, the sounds make, our head movements, our eye movements, how close or far we stand near someone, our physical appearance, our facial expressions, our posture and body contact, such as shaking hands.
Also, how the receiver perceives the information can depend on many factors with interference as one of these. If the receiver is hungry or tired (or a similar interference), they may perceive what the sender is saying as something different.
In the diagram above two men are communicating about a presentation. The Sender(left) is trying to politely give some suggestions to the Receiver(right). The Sender thinks the presentation is great, and just needs a couple of changes. The Receiver does not interpret this correctly and perceives the Sender as criticizing his work. The intention of the sender to the receiver has not been conveyed.
The role of sender and receiver switch back and forth throughout the conversation, depending on who is speaking.
Words must match nonverbal behaviors. If someone tells you something, you will believe what you see and not what they are saying. In the example above, the group does not seem congruent as they are not talking to each other. Each person has something going on in their mind.
Every day, we respond to thousands on nonverbal cues and behaviors including postures, facial expression, eye gaze, gestures and tone of voice. From our handshakes to our hairstyles, nonverbal details reveal who we are and impact how we relate to other people. Scientific research on nonverbal communication and behavior began with the 1872 publication of Charles Darwin’s The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals.
Since that time, there has been an abundance of research on the types, effects, and expression of unspoken communication and behavior. While these signals are often so subtle that we are not consciously aware of them, research has identified several different types of nonverbal communication. Facial expressions are responsible for a huge proportion of nonverbal communication. Consider how much information can be conveyed with a smile or a frown. While nonverbal communication and behavior can vary dramatically between cultures, the facial expressions for happiness, sadness, anger and fear are similar throughout the world.
Deliberate movements and signals are an important way to communicate meaning without words. Common gestures include waving, pointing, and using fingers to indicate number amounts. Other gestures are arbitrary and related to culture.
Paralinguistic refers to vocal communication that is separate from actual language. This includes factors such as tone of voice, loudness, inflection and pitch. Consider the powerful effect that tone of voice can have on the meaning of a sentence. When said in a strong tone of voice, listeners might interpret approval and enthusiasm. The same words said in a hesitant tone of voice might convey disapproval and a lack of interest. This man is showing enthusiasm in hopes of “spreading that enthusiasm around.
Your posture, facial expression, eye contact, and gestures speak louder than the words you say. Posture and movement can also convey a great deal on information. Research on body language has grown significantly since the 1970’s, but popular media has focused on the over-interpretation of defensive postures, arm-crossing/leg-crossing, especially after the publication of Julius Fast’s book Body Language. While these nonverbal behaviors can indicate feelings and attitudes, research suggests that body language is far more subtle and less definitive that previously believed.
Proxemics is what brings us together, today. The term “proxemics'' was coined by researcher Edward Hall during the 1950's and 1960's and has to do with the study of our use of space and how various differences in that use can make us feel more relaxed or anxious. There are two forms: Colors can have a major impact on our comfort level in a given situation. You would not, for instance, take a business client out to lunch at McDonalds. due at least in part to the bright reds and yellows used in their color scheme. These colors cause people anxiety and cause them to rather rush in, consume their food, and rush back out than to stay and chat.
You would be more likely to take that client to Denny's with its muted color scheme, or better yet to Marie Callender's where you can relax in a homey pastel colored environment.
Physical territory, such as why desks face the front of a classroom rather than towards a center isle, and
Personal territory that we carry with us, the "bubble" of space that you keep between yourself and the person ahead of you in a line.
People often refer to their need for “personal space,” which is also an important type of nonverbal communication. The amount of distance we need and the amount of space we perceive as belonging to us is influenced by a number of factors including social norms, situational factors, personality characteristics, and level of familiarity. For example, the amount of personal space needed when having a casual conversation with another person usually varies between 18 inches to four feet. On the other hand, the personal distance needed when speaking to a crowd of people is around 10 to 12 feet.
Another important aspect of Proxemics is the use of Personal territory. Let me briefly outline the four areas of personal territory; public, social, personal, and intimate, that we Americans intuitively respect and use.
Intimate Zone: 0’- 1 ½’ –Actually touching or of distance to be easily touched.
Personal Zone: 1 ½’ – 4’ Arms length with the ability to shake hands.
Social-Consult Zone: 4’- 10’ - Works with business.
Public Zone: 10’ away from the person.
See page 12 in workbook.
Haptics -Communicating through touch is another important nonverbal behavior. There has been a substantial amount of research on the importance of touch in infancy and early childhood. Harry Harlow’s classic monkey study demonstrated how the deprivation of touch and contact impedes development.
Our choice of color, clothing, hairstyles, and other factors affecting appearance are also considered a means of nonverbal communication. Research on color psychology has demonstrated that different colors can invoke different moods. Appearance can also alter physiological reactions, judgment and interpretations.
Kinesics, or body language, is one of the most powerful ways that humans can communicate nonverbally. It is used to portray moods and emotions and to emphasize or contradict what is being said.
Kinesics, or body language, is one of the most powerful ways that humans can communicate nonverbally. It is used to portray moods and emotions and to emphasize or contradict what is being said.
This is the proper distance for a handshake. The proper handshake is when both parties have their hands in the vertical position and both people apply equal pressure. A handshake must be warm, friendly and positive. When shaking hands look into the person’s eyes and give a genuine smile that reaches your eyes. Look into the other person’s eyes.
Shaking Hands
Handshakes are an important physical means of communicating. An immediate, firm, confident and friendly handshake helps establish a positive tone for a meeting and provides a non-verbal opportunity to establish yourself.
Involve your entire hand in the handshake. Make eye contact; without it a handshake is half as effective.
Women should shake hands with each other just as readily as men. Never allow an important meeting to begin without a handshake. To do otherwise is to nonverbally discount yourself. Some men think it is impolite to extend their hand to a woman for a handshake. A savvy businesswoman relaxes the uneasiness by extending her hand to a man right away.
The Handshake: The proper handshake is when both parties have their hands in the vertical position and both people apply equal pressure. A handshake must be warm, friendly and positive. When shaking hands. always look into the person’s eyes and give a genuine smile .
Look into the other person’s eyes. Five to seven seconds is long enough for the proper handshake.
THESE TWO PEOPLE ACTUALLY AVOIDED A GOOD HANDSHAKE. THEY ARE ONLY MAKING A GESTURE AND WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER OFF NOT TO SHAKE HANDS AT ALL THAN TO “SEND THIS MESSAGE.”
The message of squeezing your hand until you cringe is clearly designed to intimidate you. Even when the person may not know how strong they are, there is still a message of intimidation and power behind the grip. You don’t have to pretend to be a wimp with them, and, in fact, they may respond positively to you if you present yourself with strength. Just don’t get into a hand-squeezing contest when you shake because then it becomes a competition and even if you win, you’ll lose the person’s confidence in you.
