This document provides a humorous summary of Les Miserables from the perspective of someone who has only seen it through references on Tumblr. It introduces some of the main characters like Jean Valjean and an unnamed character who is important but whose name should not be forgotten. It also mentions Anne Hathaway's character and a young child character. The summary then launches into an absurd theory about the child actually being a shapeshifting, genderless, steel-plated badger that is the love child of Catwoman and Wolverine and evolves through levels like a Pokémon.

1. CATS Les Miserables
From the POV of someone who hasn't seen it,
but has a Tumblr
By Ichbinvelociraptor

2. So first, there's this guy...
Jean Valjean, I think he's called...
Take my eggs!
He wants us to take his
number,
so we should call him,
maybe... But, he's played by Hugh
Jackman, so I guess I'll take it.
I mean, it's Hugh Jackman, so
he's gotta be cool...

3. And then, there's
this guy...
I don't actually
remember what
he's called...
Do not forget my name!
...But it seems to be
really important that
...So I guess I've failed
we do not forget his
him...
name...

4. And now for one of my personal favorites:
The Lovely ,Anne Hathaway!
I've no idea what she does, but it's
Anne Hathaway, so it's gotta be good
right?
Look, it's the Anne Hathiraptor!
Hey guurll, U look sad, lemme work ma velocimagic on U gur l
Maybe she's a Or a stray cat
princess! on the streets
of Paris...

5. And then, there's this kid...
Don't hate me cuz I'm beautiful!
Whose is it? What does it do?
What is its significance?
What is its gender?
But, as you can see On my way to steal yo gurl!
here, it is also idiotic
and masculine. (same
thing, really)
See how beautiful and
feminine it looks here?
I have a theory that answers all of
these questions:

6. It's very simple, really:
This creature (or as some call it,
“Child”) is obviously the love child of
Catwoman and Wolveriene.
Honey Badger just revolts as it wants
It is known commonly as a
shapeshifting, genderless, steel plated
badger.
Easy Equation: BAMF + Metal plated mutant BAMF = Genderless
BAMF creature plated with steel who can transform into a weird,

7. But how does this creature transform? Another theory is
that this lovechild does not transform, but it evolves.
Perhaps it is a Pokemon, that would make sense, seeing that
its parents are Catwoman and Wolveriene .
Honey, honey get out of the tub, I think I'm going into labor!
HOLD YOUR HORSES, WOMAN! I'm not squeaky clean yet!

8. 3 HOURS LATER

9. 4000 steps later
●
What's this? Your egg has hatched into
Sadbeauty.
I'm so happy!

10. 15 levels later
● What's this? Your Sadbeauty has evolved into
Handsomefist

11. After a trade with another player
● What? Your Handsomefist has evolved into
AndrogiBAMFger

12. And what's with this mound of stuff? I mean, I just don't see what's so great about it....
But people sure do seem to like being dramatic on top of it.
It doesn't seem very safe, I mean, for all we know the badger kid is buried in there!
No, You'll stay there and like it until I'm done being dramatic up here!
Daddy, I don't like it in here, can I come out?

13. People are obsessed with this dude... but who is he?
He looks sorta like Gilderoy
Lockhart
Who am I?

14. Everybody Dies
But then again...

15. Oh yeah, Spoiler alert