Couples who share housework have stronger marriages, and kids with active fathers are happier, healthier, and more successful. Read these #LeanInTogether “Tips for Men at Home” to get practical advice for creating a 50/50 home.
2. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
Women still do the majority of domestic work.
Even women who work outside the home do 40 percent more
childcare and 30 percent more housework than their husbands.1
Yet research shows that everyone benefits when men lean in for
equality—starting with men themselves. Men who are active
fathers and caregivers are healthier.2
Couples that share
responsibilities have stronger marriages.3
Children with involved
fathers are happier, healthier and more successful.4
6 TIPS
FOR MEN AT HOME
3. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
1
1 BE A 50/50 PARTNER
SITUATION
Running a house and raising children is hard work, and women
still do most of it. More women than ever are primary or co-
breadwinners, yet only 9 percent of couples in dual-income
marriages report sharing childcare, housework, and breadwinning
evenly.
Approach the responsibilities of childcare and housework as real
partners. Commit to do your fair share of daily chores, and make
sure work is split evenly.
SOLUTION
5. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
2
2 BE AN ACTIVE FATHER
SITUATION
There’s simply no substitute for hands-on fathering. Children with
involved fathers have higher self-esteem, better cognitive and
social skills, fewer behavioral problems, and higher academic
achievement.5
SOLUTION
Be an involved dad. Help with homework, read together, and talk
with your kids. You don’t have to be perfect—you just have to be
engaged.
6. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
3
Parents often value on the chores boys typically do (like taking
out the trash) more than on chores that girls usually do (like
setting the table), so boys spend less time on chores but make
more money than girls.6
Give your children equal chores and equal allowance. It is also
important to show your kids what 50/50 looks like by sharing
housework with your partner.
3 CLOSE THE WAGE GAP AT HOME
SITUATION
SOLUTION
8. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
4
SITUATION
Kids’ beliefs are shaped by the world around them, and girls are often
sent the wrong messages. Traditional girls’ toys focus on appearance
and caretaking, while boys’ toys focus on competition and spatial
skills.7
Moreover, children's books are twice as likely to feature a male
character in the lead role.8
Have your kids play with a variety of toys, and be thoughtful about
what they read and watch on TV. Talk with your kids about the
messages in media about women and men.
4 CHALLENGE GENDER STEREOTYPES
SOLUTION
9. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
5
SITUATION
As early as middle school, parents place a higher value on
leadership for boys than for girls.9
Girls are often labeled “bossy”
when they take the lead, and they’re called on less in class and
interrupted more than boys.10
These factors often discourage girls
from leading.
Celebrate your daughter’s efforts to lead. Help her set goals and
reach outside her comfort zone. Encourage her to participate in
sports or other organized activities.
5 HELP YOUR DAUGHTER LEAD
SOLUTION
11. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
6
SITUATION
Movies, video games, and comic books offer boys stories of men
who are strong, aggressive, and in charge but rarely vulnerable or
nurturing. Boys often emulate these oversimplified characters. You
can model a more complete definition of manhood.
SOLUTION
Encourage your son to respect his own feelings and have empathy
for others, and avoid language like “man up,” which can be as
damaging to boys as “bossy” and can be for girls.
6 DON’T TELL YOUR SON TO “MAN UP!”
12. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
When men lean in for equality, they win—and so does everyone
else. Children are happier and healthier. Marriages are stronger.
Teams and companies produce better results. Men, show the
world you’re for equality. Women, celebrate men leaning in.
In for equality? Pass it on—#LeanInTogether
LET’S
#LEANINTOGETHER
13. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
ENDNOTES
1 Melissa A. Milkie, Sara B. Raley, and Suzanne M. Bianchi, “Taking on the Second Shift: Time Allocations and Time
Pressures of U.S. Parents with Preschoolers,” Social Forces 88, no. 2 (2009): 487–517.
2 Craig S. Garfield, Anthony Isacco, and Wendy D. Bartlo, “Men’s Health and Fatherhood in the Urban Midwestern
United States,” International Journal of Men’s Health 9, no. 3 (2010): 161–74; Stephanie L. Brown et al., “Caregiving
Behavior Is Associated with Decreased Mortality Risk,” Physiological Science 20, no. 4 (2009): 488–94; and Joseph
H. Pleck and Brian P. Masciadrelli, “Paternal Involvement in U.S. Residential Fathers: Levels, Sources, and
Consequences,” in The Role of the Father in Child Development, ed. Michael E. Lamb (Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley &
Sons, 2004): 222–71.
3 Lynne P. Cook, “‘Doing’ Gender in Context: Household Bargaining and the Risk of Divorce in Germany and the
United States,” American Journal of Sociology 112, no. 2 (2006): 442–72; Daniel T. Carlson et al., “The Gendered
Division of Housework and Couples’ Sexual Relationships: A Re-examination,” Sociology Faculty Publications, Paper
2, 2014; Constance T. Gager and Scott T. Yabiku, “Who Has the Time? The Relationship Between Household Labor
Time and Sexual Frequency,” Journal of Family Issues 31, no. 2 (2010): 135–63; Neil Chethik, VoiceMale: What
Husbands Really Think About Their Marriages, Their Wives, Sex, Housework, and Commitment (New York: Simon &
Schuster, 2006); and K. V. Rao and Alfred DeMaris, “Coital Frequency Among Married and Cohabitating Couples in
the United States,” Journal of Biosocial Science 27, no. 2 (1995): 135–50.
4 For a thorough review, see Michael E. Lamb, The Role of the Father in Child Development (Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley
& Sons, 2010); Anna Sarkadi et al., “Fathers’ Involvement and Children’s Developmental Outcomes: A Systematic
Review of Longitudinal Studies,” Acta Paediatrica 97, no. 2 (2008): 153–58; and Sarah Allen and Kerry Daly, The
Effects of Father Involvement: An Updated Research Summary of the Evidence (Guelph, ON: Centre for Families,
Work & Well-Being, 2007).
5 For a thorough review, see Lamb, The Role of the Father in Child Development; Sarkadi et al., “Fathers’ Involvement
and Children’s Developmental Outcomes,” pp. 153–58; and Allen and Daly, The Effects of Father Involvement.
14. #LeanInTogether | LeanInTogether.Org
6 Institute for Social Research, Time, Money, and Who Does the Laundry, University of Michigan, Research Update
(2007); and Gender Pay Gap Starts at Home as Boys Earn More for Household Chores, survey by PktMny, 2013.
7 Judith E. Owen Blakemore and Rene E. Centers, “Characteristics of Boys’ and Girls’ Toys,” Sex Roles 53 nos. 9–10
(2005): 619–33.
8 Mykol C. Hamilton et al., “Gender Stereotyping and Under-representation of Female Characters in 200 Popular
Children’s Picture Books: A Twenty-first Century Update,” Sex Roles 55 nos. 11–12 (2006): 757–65.
9 Kathleen Mullan Harris and J. Richard Udry, National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health (Add Health), 1994–
2008, ICPSR21600-v14, Chapel Hill, NC: Carolina Population Center, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill/Ann
Arbor, MI: Inter-university Consortium for Political and Social Research, http://www.icpsr.umich.edu/icpsrweb/
ICPSR/studies/21600.
10 American Association of University Women, How Schools Shortchange Girls (1992); Myra Sadker and David M.
Sadker, Failing at Fairness: How American’s Schools Cheat Girls (New York: C. Scribner’s Sons, 1994); and Elizabeth
J. Whitt et al., “Women’s Perceptions of a ‘Chilly Climate’ and Cognitive Outcomes in College: Additional
Evidence,” Journal of College Student Development 40, no. 2 (1999): 163–77.
ENDNOTES