This document discusses ways to heal hurts in marriage. It states that all marriages experience misunderstandings and conflicts that can hurt the spouses. To heal, spouses must acknowledge their own faults in conflicts, be willing to resolve issues through open communication, and apply biblical principles like confession and forgiveness. However, certain factors like pride, guilt, laziness, shame, and fear can hinder the healing process if not addressed. The document encourages spouses to overcome these hindrances through humility, accepting responsibility, effort, embracing God's grace, and facing their fears in order to restore hurt relationships.
Is Kissing Okay? Questions and answers about moralityjohnhiltoniii
Modified from a talk on CD, "Dating and the plan of happiness" this talk by John Hilton III discusses why the law of chastity is so important, and answers questions such as "how far can you go and not sin?" "Why can't I date until I'm 16?" and "Is it okay to steady date?"
What is Peer Pressure? Peer pressure can also be said to be an influence that a peer group, observer or individual exerts that encourage others to change their attitude, values or behaviour to conform to group norms. Proverbs 13:20
When you made the decision to marry your spouse, what were your expectations about how the family finances were going to be handled? Did you even have any? Marriage and money go hand in hand. When there is unity in handling money God’s way, it helps lead to unity in your marriage as well. Whether you are a newlywed or married for 50 years, in this class, you will learn what the Bible says about handling money God’s way and the importance of this in our marriages. Come and learn how to have unity in money and in your marriage.
If you enjoy this, please visit my Daily Dependence website for Daily Encouragement, Scriptures, and Inspirational Thoughts to help place your Dependence on God!
You can follow me at www.facebook.com/DailyDependence
Is Kissing Okay? Questions and answers about moralityjohnhiltoniii
Modified from a talk on CD, "Dating and the plan of happiness" this talk by John Hilton III discusses why the law of chastity is so important, and answers questions such as "how far can you go and not sin?" "Why can't I date until I'm 16?" and "Is it okay to steady date?"
What is Peer Pressure? Peer pressure can also be said to be an influence that a peer group, observer or individual exerts that encourage others to change their attitude, values or behaviour to conform to group norms. Proverbs 13:20
When you made the decision to marry your spouse, what were your expectations about how the family finances were going to be handled? Did you even have any? Marriage and money go hand in hand. When there is unity in handling money God’s way, it helps lead to unity in your marriage as well. Whether you are a newlywed or married for 50 years, in this class, you will learn what the Bible says about handling money God’s way and the importance of this in our marriages. Come and learn how to have unity in money and in your marriage.
If you enjoy this, please visit my Daily Dependence website for Daily Encouragement, Scriptures, and Inspirational Thoughts to help place your Dependence on God!
You can follow me at www.facebook.com/DailyDependence
This book is for anyone that has gone through a storm and maybe going thru one now. Learn the types of storm and how they relate to you. Trust Gods word and learn his way out of each and every storm.
Even when it's hard to see God in our story, God is the author who will faithfully write the ending. Sermon preached at the five weekend services of First Presbyterian Church of Bethlehem on September 12-13, 2015.
5 God's Choice & Our Choices James 1:13-18Rick Peterson
God's Choice & Our Choices James 1:13-18 Adapted from a Tim Bond sermon http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermons/gods-choice--our-choices-tim-bond-sermon-on-temptation-resisting-48423.asp
It is important to know that God made us to have emotions, therefore, having emotions in itself, is not a sin. However, if we are not careful, satan can manipulate our emotions, such as anger, and cause us to hate or kill another person! Satan can lead one to believe that the lust they have is really “love,” justifying acts of adultery, fornication and sodomy.
ORDNIJIET TELEPATHIC TA JEHOVAH MISSIER MYLo Que Vendra
ORDNIJIET TELEPATHIC TA JEHOVAH MISSIER MY
X SE JIĠU
X'INHU LI JIDĦLU, JITLAQ KULL WIEĦED; GĦAX DAN KIEN MIKTUB, LI KULL WIEĦED KIEN JIĠI ĠĠUDIKAT MILL-XOGĦLIJIET TAGĦHOM; ALLA L-ĠUDIZZJU DIVINE, HIJA IDEA GĦAL IDEA, MILL-ETÀ TA ' TNAX; GĦAX IT-TFAL HUMA DAWK LI JKOLLHOM L-EBDA SENTENZA DIVINE, SENTENZA DIVINE TA ' ALLA, HIJA L-ĦAJJA ADULTA HEKK IMSEJĦA, IL-ĦSIEB TA ' L-IT-TIENI TEST, SE JKUNU L-EKWIVALENZA TA ' L-EŻISTENZA; LI SKOND KIF HUWA MAĦSUB, JISTGĦU JKUNU L-EŻISTENZA TA ' WON TAD-DAWL, JEW L-EŻISTENZA TAD-DAWL MITLUF; DAN DIN GĦANDHA GĦAL DIK TA ' ALLA, GĦANDU L-EBDA LIMITI; -ETERNAL MILL-ISFORZ MENTALI MIKROSKOPIKU TA ' KREATURI TIEGĦU, KARATTERISTIĊI FIL-PREMJIJIET, SĦIĦA TAL-ĦAŻNA.
1 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA MA LAĦAQX L-KELMA KOMMESSA; DAWK IL-WHO WAQA FIL-KSUR, SER JIDĦLU MA L-RENJU TA ' NORBERT; LI KIEKU MA MĦARSA X IMWIEGĦDA GĦALL-IEĦOR, HUWA MA WKOLL SE JILTAQGĦU MIEGĦU; L-NONCOMPLIANCE SARET AKTAR KOEŻISTENZA MORR, BNIEDEM; ĦAFNA TILFU L-FIDUĊJA TIEGĦU IRĠIEL TA ' L-INDIVIDWU MINĦABBA L-NONCOMPLIANCE; ĦAJJA KOLLHA LI TEST, DOVUT EXSISTENCIAS, TAGĦHA N-NUQQAS TA ' RISPETT GĦALL-OĦRAJN; DIN IL-KWISTJONI TAL-EXSISTENCIAS HUWA EKWIVALENTI GĦAN-NUMRU TAL-PORI TAL-LAĦAM, LI KELLU INNIFSU, LI KIEN DECEIVED; HUWA EĦFEF LI JIDĦLU FIL-RENJU TA ' NORBERT, WIEĦED LI KOLLOX KIEN SINĊIERI; LI JKUNU JISTGĦU JIDĦLU, WIEĦED LI MA RNEXXILUX REŻISTENZA MENTALI, LI L-WEGĦDA STRAMBA MHUX MITMUMA.
2 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA PROTESTED L-INJUSTICES TAD-DINJA STRAMBA, MILL-LIĠIJIET STRAMBA TAD-DEHEB; PROTESTI KOLLHA LI STRAMBA IL-MOD TAL-ĦAJJA, MHUX BIL-MIKTUB L-RENJU TA ' NORBERT, HIJA PROFONDAMENT-RENJU TA ' NORBERT; DAN PREMJU ĦAFNA HIJA L-BAŻI TAT-TIENI MILL-TIENI; U KULL SEKONDA HIJA MMULTIPLIKATA MINN ELF; GĦAX HUWA PUNTEĠĠ KOLLETTIV; IL-PROTESTI MA KIENX GĦALIH INNIFSU; IMMA LI INKLUŻI L-OĦRAJN KOLLHA; DAN IL-PUNTEĠĠ TINKLUDI L-UMANITÀ KOLLHA; DAWK LI PROTESTED FIL-PUBBLIKU MOD, GĦANDHOM WON BĦALA ĦAFNA TIKEK TA ' DAWL, BĦAN-NUMRU TOTALI TAL-PORI TAL-ĠILDA, TA ' L-UMANITÀ KOLLHA.
3 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA WAQA FIL-FAĊLI; XEJN MA KIEN FAĊLI DWAR IT-TEST TAL-ĦAJJA, XEJN MA JIRĊIEVI L-GĦOTJA; FAĊLI KIF HUWA GĦOTJA BIEX L-ISPIRTU; IL-PROVA TA ' L-ĦAJJA KIENET, MUMENT MILL-MUMENT, BIEX JINGĦELBU JEKK, FIL-SENSAZZJONIJIET KOLLHA LI JINTLAĦQU L-ISPIRTU; IL FEELING TA ' ĠID, LI KIEN AKTAR I TTARDJATI U MAQSUMA L-FROTT SPIRITWALI; GĦALIEX I WALKED BOGĦOD L-ISPIRTU TAX-XOGĦOL; IX-XOGĦOL JIRRAPPREŻENTA L-OGĦLA PUNTEĠĠ TAD-DAWL; GĦAX DAĦAL MILL-KREATUR DIVINE STESS TA ' L-UNIVERS; HUWA AKTAR FAĊLI LI TIDĦOL L-RENJU TAL-NORBERT, LI IMITAT HU TA ' ALLA, FUQ L-PLANETS BOGĦOD TAT-TEST; LI JKUNU JISTGĦU JIDĦLU, LI MINNHOM MHUX-IMITAT.
4 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA KIENU INDIFFERENTI, LIEMA HUMA STESS TALAB GĦAR-RENJU TA ' NORBERT; KOLLHA KIENU TTESTJATI FIL-ĦAJJA, IL-MUMENT MILL-MUMENT; DIN IL-LIĠI SE TKUN MIFHUMA, KIF ID-DINJA TAT-
This book is for anyone that has gone through a storm and maybe going thru one now. Learn the types of storm and how they relate to you. Trust Gods word and learn his way out of each and every storm.
Even when it's hard to see God in our story, God is the author who will faithfully write the ending. Sermon preached at the five weekend services of First Presbyterian Church of Bethlehem on September 12-13, 2015.
5 God's Choice & Our Choices James 1:13-18Rick Peterson
God's Choice & Our Choices James 1:13-18 Adapted from a Tim Bond sermon http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermons/gods-choice--our-choices-tim-bond-sermon-on-temptation-resisting-48423.asp
It is important to know that God made us to have emotions, therefore, having emotions in itself, is not a sin. However, if we are not careful, satan can manipulate our emotions, such as anger, and cause us to hate or kill another person! Satan can lead one to believe that the lust they have is really “love,” justifying acts of adultery, fornication and sodomy.
ORDNIJIET TELEPATHIC TA JEHOVAH MISSIER MYLo Que Vendra
ORDNIJIET TELEPATHIC TA JEHOVAH MISSIER MY
X SE JIĠU
X'INHU LI JIDĦLU, JITLAQ KULL WIEĦED; GĦAX DAN KIEN MIKTUB, LI KULL WIEĦED KIEN JIĠI ĠĠUDIKAT MILL-XOGĦLIJIET TAGĦHOM; ALLA L-ĠUDIZZJU DIVINE, HIJA IDEA GĦAL IDEA, MILL-ETÀ TA ' TNAX; GĦAX IT-TFAL HUMA DAWK LI JKOLLHOM L-EBDA SENTENZA DIVINE, SENTENZA DIVINE TA ' ALLA, HIJA L-ĦAJJA ADULTA HEKK IMSEJĦA, IL-ĦSIEB TA ' L-IT-TIENI TEST, SE JKUNU L-EKWIVALENZA TA ' L-EŻISTENZA; LI SKOND KIF HUWA MAĦSUB, JISTGĦU JKUNU L-EŻISTENZA TA ' WON TAD-DAWL, JEW L-EŻISTENZA TAD-DAWL MITLUF; DAN DIN GĦANDHA GĦAL DIK TA ' ALLA, GĦANDU L-EBDA LIMITI; -ETERNAL MILL-ISFORZ MENTALI MIKROSKOPIKU TA ' KREATURI TIEGĦU, KARATTERISTIĊI FIL-PREMJIJIET, SĦIĦA TAL-ĦAŻNA.
1 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA MA LAĦAQX L-KELMA KOMMESSA; DAWK IL-WHO WAQA FIL-KSUR, SER JIDĦLU MA L-RENJU TA ' NORBERT; LI KIEKU MA MĦARSA X IMWIEGĦDA GĦALL-IEĦOR, HUWA MA WKOLL SE JILTAQGĦU MIEGĦU; L-NONCOMPLIANCE SARET AKTAR KOEŻISTENZA MORR, BNIEDEM; ĦAFNA TILFU L-FIDUĊJA TIEGĦU IRĠIEL TA ' L-INDIVIDWU MINĦABBA L-NONCOMPLIANCE; ĦAJJA KOLLHA LI TEST, DOVUT EXSISTENCIAS, TAGĦHA N-NUQQAS TA ' RISPETT GĦALL-OĦRAJN; DIN IL-KWISTJONI TAL-EXSISTENCIAS HUWA EKWIVALENTI GĦAN-NUMRU TAL-PORI TAL-LAĦAM, LI KELLU INNIFSU, LI KIEN DECEIVED; HUWA EĦFEF LI JIDĦLU FIL-RENJU TA ' NORBERT, WIEĦED LI KOLLOX KIEN SINĊIERI; LI JKUNU JISTGĦU JIDĦLU, WIEĦED LI MA RNEXXILUX REŻISTENZA MENTALI, LI L-WEGĦDA STRAMBA MHUX MITMUMA.
2 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA PROTESTED L-INJUSTICES TAD-DINJA STRAMBA, MILL-LIĠIJIET STRAMBA TAD-DEHEB; PROTESTI KOLLHA LI STRAMBA IL-MOD TAL-ĦAJJA, MHUX BIL-MIKTUB L-RENJU TA ' NORBERT, HIJA PROFONDAMENT-RENJU TA ' NORBERT; DAN PREMJU ĦAFNA HIJA L-BAŻI TAT-TIENI MILL-TIENI; U KULL SEKONDA HIJA MMULTIPLIKATA MINN ELF; GĦAX HUWA PUNTEĠĠ KOLLETTIV; IL-PROTESTI MA KIENX GĦALIH INNIFSU; IMMA LI INKLUŻI L-OĦRAJN KOLLHA; DAN IL-PUNTEĠĠ TINKLUDI L-UMANITÀ KOLLHA; DAWK LI PROTESTED FIL-PUBBLIKU MOD, GĦANDHOM WON BĦALA ĦAFNA TIKEK TA ' DAWL, BĦAN-NUMRU TOTALI TAL-PORI TAL-ĠILDA, TA ' L-UMANITÀ KOLLHA.
3 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA WAQA FIL-FAĊLI; XEJN MA KIEN FAĊLI DWAR IT-TEST TAL-ĦAJJA, XEJN MA JIRĊIEVI L-GĦOTJA; FAĊLI KIF HUWA GĦOTJA BIEX L-ISPIRTU; IL-PROVA TA ' L-ĦAJJA KIENET, MUMENT MILL-MUMENT, BIEX JINGĦELBU JEKK, FIL-SENSAZZJONIJIET KOLLHA LI JINTLAĦQU L-ISPIRTU; IL FEELING TA ' ĠID, LI KIEN AKTAR I TTARDJATI U MAQSUMA L-FROTT SPIRITWALI; GĦALIEX I WALKED BOGĦOD L-ISPIRTU TAX-XOGĦOL; IX-XOGĦOL JIRRAPPREŻENTA L-OGĦLA PUNTEĠĠ TAD-DAWL; GĦAX DAĦAL MILL-KREATUR DIVINE STESS TA ' L-UNIVERS; HUWA AKTAR FAĊLI LI TIDĦOL L-RENJU TAL-NORBERT, LI IMITAT HU TA ' ALLA, FUQ L-PLANETS BOGĦOD TAT-TEST; LI JKUNU JISTGĦU JIDĦLU, LI MINNHOM MHUX-IMITAT.
4 FIL-PROVA TAL-ĦAJJA, ĦAFNA KIENU INDIFFERENTI, LIEMA HUMA STESS TALAB GĦAR-RENJU TA ' NORBERT; KOLLHA KIENU TTESTJATI FIL-ĦAJJA, IL-MUMENT MILL-MUMENT; DIN IL-LIĠI SE TKUN MIFHUMA, KIF ID-DINJA TAT-
Description:
In "Key to Successful Marriage," embark on a transformative journey that unravels the secrets to building a strong and fulfilling partnership. This captivating self-development book offers invaluable insights and practical strategies to nurture a harmonious marital relationship.
Discover the proven keys to unlock the true potential of your marriage. Explore powerful communication techniques that deepen connection, resolve conflicts, and foster understanding. Gain profound insights into cultivating trust, intimacy, and emotional resilience, paving the way for a lifetime of love and happiness.
With an expert blend of research-backed wisdom and real-life anecdotes, this SlideShare masterpiece offers a comprehensive roadmap to navigate the challenges every couple faces. Uncover the art of compromise, effective problem-solving, and the importance of self-care within the context of marriage.
This SEO-optimized book guide is meticulously designed to empower couples of all stages, from newlyweds seeking a solid foundation to long-term partners aiming to reignite the spark. Utilize actionable advice and expert guidance to foster mutual respect, shared values, and healthy boundaries, creating a lasting and meaningful connection.
"Key to Successful Marriage" is your key to unlocking the abundant joys and fulfilling rewards that a thriving marital relationship can bring. Embark on this transformative journey today and cultivate the love and happiness your relationship truly deserves.
Keywords: successful marriage, lasting happiness, self-development, transformative journey, communication techniques, trust, intimacy, emotional resilience, compromise, problem-solving, self-care, empowering couples, shared values, healthy boundaries, love, happiness
Truth is, divorce has an ugly side to it. It’s the easy way out for people who have not an ounce of courage to salvage what deserves to be salvaged. While divorcing couples spend their mental energies accusing the other of causing hurt and disharmony in the union, they forget that the children suffer in double doses. Therefore, this book simply highlights the various points that promote the numerous advantages of staying married.
2. • ONE OF THE SECRETS OF SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE IS THE
SPOUSES’ ABILITY TO HEAL THEIR HURTS AS SOON AS THEY
OCCUR. BUT WHY DO WE HURT EACH OTHER AS HUSBAND
AND WIFE? WHY DO TWO PEOPLE WHO HAVE COMMITTED
TO LOVE EACH OTHER FOR LIFETIME SOMETIMES FORGET
EACH OTHER, IGNORE THE OTHER OR TURN ON EACH
OTHER?
3. • THE ANSWER IS THAT MARRIAGE IS
MADE UP OF TWO IMPERFECT
PEOPLE WHO ARE SOMETIMES
THOUGHTLESS, INSENSITIVE,
UNKIND OR DOWNRIGHT SELFISH.
AND TWO IMPERFECT PEOPLE
SHARING THE SAME SPACE ARE
BOUND TO GET INTO SOME
DISAGREEMETS.
4. • WE ALL GET INTO THESE MARITAL SQUABLES NOW AND
THEN NO MATTER HOW MUCH WE MAY WISH TO AVOID
THEM; AND HOW SAD WE FEEL WHEN THEY HAPPEN. SO IT
IS IMPORTANT FOR EVERY SPOUSE TO KNOW THAT EVERY
MARRIAGE HAS ITS SHARE OF RELATIONAL
MISUNDERSTANDINGS, MISTAKES, CLASHES AND HARD
TIME.
5. • SOME OF THE SOURCES OF OUR
HURTS ARE VERY ACUTE. SOME CAN
BE MARITAL
UNFAITHFULNESS, BETRAYAL, OR
EVEN VIOLENCE. IT DOES NOT
MATTER HOW DEEPLY YOU LOVE
EACH OTHER; WHEN CONFLICT
COMES, IT CAN BADLY HURT YOU.
BUT WHAT DO YOU WHEN IT
COMES?
6. • MANY COUPLES DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN THEY
ARE HURTING. THEY DO NOTHING AND SO THEY SLOWLY
DRIFT APART FROM EACH OTHER. THE NUMBER ONE
SOURCE OF BAD MARRIAGES IS HABITUAL AVOIDANCE OF
CONFLICT. DEFINITELY IF ONE SPOUSE OR BOTH OF THEM
TRY TO PRETEND THAT THERE IS NO TROUBLE, OR JUST KEEP
QUIET AS IF IT IS NOT THERE, WHILE INSIDE OF THEM IS
HURTING, THE GAP WILL CONTINUE WIDENING.
7. • AND SO RATHER THAN TRYING TO HEAL OUR HURTS, AND
MOVE ON WITH LIFE, WE ALLOW OUR PROBLEMS TO PILE
UP, MISTAKENLY OR SECRETLY WISHING THAT TIME WILL
BRING A HEALING TO OUR WOUNDS. BUT IT DOES NOT.
INSTEAD, STORED AND UNRESOLVED CONFLICTS AND
UNHEALED HURTS HARDEN OUR HEARTS AND DRIVE A
WEDGE BETWEEN US AS THE HUSBANDS AND THE WIVES.
8. • IF YOU DO NOT INTENTIONALLY PLAN TO HEAL YOUR
HURTS, BUT KEEP ON BURRYING THEM INTO YOUR
HEARTS, YOU WILL FEEL STUCK AND UNHAPPY, LIVING IN
THE SAME HOUSE, AND MAY BE GOING TO THE SAME
CHURCH, BEARING THE SAME NAME[ MR AND MRS…].
WHAT A TERRIBLE LIFE THAT IS! THE MARRIAGE DREAM
THAT YOU ONCE SHARED WILL DIE A SLOW AND PAINFUL
DEATH.
10. •HOW DO WE HEAL OUR
HURTS? WHAT DO WE DO?
WHERE DO WE START TO
SOLVE OUR HURTS WHEN
THEY COME? THREE THINGS
ARE NEEDED FOR YOUR
HEALING.
11. • 1. YOU KNEED TO COME TO GRIPS WITH THE REALITY THAT YOU
AND YOUR SPOUSE CAUSE EACH THER PAIN FROM TIME TO TIME.
IT MAY NOT BE INTENTIONAL AND YOU MAY NOT EVEN BE AWARE
OF IT WHEN IT HAPPENS. BUT IT HAPPENS IN THE DAY TO DAY
COURSE OF YOUR LIFE TOGETHER THROUGH WHAT YOU SAY OR
FAIL TO SAY, AND THROUGH WHAT WE DO OR FAIL TO DO. ADMIT
THAT BOTH OF YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE. IT TAKES TWO PEOPLE TO
TANGLE AND IT WILL TAKE THE SAME TO UNTANGLE.
12. • 2. YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN THE INVITABLE
CONFLICTS AND PAIN OCCUR IN YOUR MARRIAGE.
CONFLICTS MUST BE RESOLVED. OFFENSES MUST BE
CONFESSED AND FORGIVEN. HURTS MUST BE HEALED. THE
BIBLICAL WAY OF SOLVING ANY PROBLEM IS FACING IT. TO
CAIN HE SAID, ‘SIN IS CROUCHING AT THE DOOR, AND ITS
DESIRE IS FOR YOU, BUT YOU MUST OVERCOME IT” GEN 4:7.
13. • 3. YOU NEED TO PUT GOD’S PLAN INTO PRACTICE WHEN CONFLICT AND HURT
HAPPEN IN YOUR MARRIAGE. PRAYER ALONE IS NOT ENOUGH. YOU MUST PUT
INTO PRACTICE WHAT YOU KNOW TO BE THE WAY OUT. JESUS SAID, “NOW
THAT YOU KNOW THESE THINGS, YOU WILL BE BLESSED IF YOU DO THEM.”
JOHN 13:17. THE PRODIGAL SON WAS IN MESS. HE BY CHOICE LANDED
HIMSELF THERE. HOW DID HE COME OUT OF THE TROUBLE? HE CAME TO HIS
SENSES. HE MADE UP HIS MIND. HE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING AND FOR
SURE HE DID. LUKE 15:17. FOR YOU TO COME OUT OF YOUR HURTS IN YOUR
MARRIAGE, YOU MUST DECIDE TO COME OUT OF IT AND DO IT.
15. •AS YOU ALL KNOW THERE ARE
THINGS IF ENTERTAINED BY A
WIFE, HUSBAND OR
BOTH, WILL NOT BRING ANY
HEALING TO THE HURTS THE
SPOUSES EXPERIENCE. SOME
OF THESE ARE:
16. • 1. PRIDE. PRIDE MAY BE THE MOST DESTRUCTIVE AND HARMFUL
IMPENDMENT TO HEALING OF HURTS IN A MARRIAGE. NO WONDER
THE BIBLE SAYS, “PRIDE GOES BEFORE DESTRUCTION AND
HAUGHTINESS BEFORE A FALL” PROVERBS 16:18. THIS TYPE OF PRIDE
REFUSES TO ADMIT FAULTS, PLACING BLAMES FOR PROBLEMS AND ON
CONFLICTS ON OTHERS. IT IS A TYPE OF PRIDE THAT CAUSES EITHER
THE HUSBAND, THE WIFE OR BOTH TO STAND FIRM ON HIS/HER
OPINION AND REFUSES TO MAKE THE FIRST STEP TOWARDS HEALING.
17. • THE OPPOSITE OF PRIDE IS HUMILITY. AND THE FIRST STEP TO
HUMILITY IS FOR ONE TO REALIZE THAT HE/SHE IS PROUD.
NOTHING ELSE THAT CAN BE DONE TOWARDS HEALING A HURT
APART FROM EVERY MARRIED MAN OR WOMAN TO RECOGNIZE
THE LEVEL OF PRIDE IN HIS/HER HEART. HUMILITY IS A GIFT THAT
WE RARELY ASK FOR BECAUSE IT USUALLY COMES IN THE FORM OF
DIFFICULT LESSONS. TAKE CARE OF YOUR PRIDE IN YOUR HEART
AND THE FIRST STEP OF PEACE BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE
IS GOT.
18. • 2.GUILT. A SPOUSE MAY COMMIT A TERRIBLE, FOOLISH ACT THAT
AFFECTS NOT ONLY THE OTHER PARTNER BUT ALSO THE WHOLE
FAMILY. E.G PUTTING FAMILY MONEY INTO A GHOST COMPANY
AND THE WHOLE FORTUNE IS GONE. THE WIFE, HUSBAND OR
CHILDREN MAY SUFFER FINANCIALLY BECAUSE OF THAT. WHEN THE
OTHER SPOUSE WISHES TO HELP THE OTHER TO GET OUT OF
IT, THE GUILTY ONE CONTINUES TO CRY, WEEP AND DO OTHER
NON PROFITABLE ACTS. GUILT HAS OVERCOME HIM/HER. WHAT IS
THE WAY FORWARD?
19. • UNRESOLVED GUILT CAN INHIBIT THE RESTOARATION OF A BROKEN
RELATIONSHIP. WHEN YOU FEEL GUILTY YOU NEED TO ASK YOURSELF A
POINTED QUESTION, HAVE I VIOLATED THE LAW OF GOD OR HUMANITY THAT
WOULD LEAD ME TO FEEL WHAT IAM FEELING? IF YOU ANSWER POSITIVELY
THEN YOU ARE ON THE RIGHT PATH TO HEALING. CONFRONT YOUR GUILT.
ACCEPT WHAT YOU DID WAS WRONG THOUGH YOU INTENDED TO DO RIGHT.
DO NOT JUSTFY YOURSELF. . DO NOT SAY, “ I DID IT BUT….” SIMPLY CONFESS
YOUR SIN, ASK FOR FORGIVENESS AND THE OFFENDED PARTY. IF THEY ARE
ALSO HUMBLE THEY WILL FORGIVE YOU YOUR OFFENSE AND LIFE WILL
CONTINUE.
20. • THE ONLY SURE AND GENUINE WAY, [DIFFICULT AS IT MAY SEEM]
OF HEALING YOUR HURT IS CONFESSING YOUR SIN. DO NOT LIVE
IN GUILT. THE BIBLE SAYS, “FOR THE SORROW THAT IS ACCORDING
TO THE WILL OF GOD PRODUCES A REPENTANCE WITHOUT
REGRET, LEADING TO SALVATION; BUT THE SORROW OF THE
WORLD PRODUCES DEATH.” 2CORN 7:10. IF YOU CONFESS YOUR
SIN, YOUR GUILT WILL GO AWAY AND YOU WILL EXPERIENCE A
HEALING AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP WILL BE RESTORED.
21. • 3. LAZINESS. THE THIRD ENEMY AND TERRIBLE ROADBLOCK
TO HEALING A HURT IN YOUR MARRIAGE IS LAZINESS. MANY
MARRIAGES BEGIN WITH A ZEAL FROM BOTH THE SPOUSES.
THINK OF THE EFFORT A YOUNG MAN PUTS TO HAVE THE
LADY. THINK OF HOW THE LADY PREPARES HERSELF AS SHE
PLANS TO MEET THE MAN. BUT AFTER MARRIAGE, A TYPE
OF LAZINESS CROPS IN.
22. • WHEN CONFLICT ARISES, THEY ARE TOO LAZY TO DEAL WITH
IT. THEY PULL AWAY FROM THE HEAT AND ESCAPE INTO
THEIR FANTASIES, WITH ACTIVITIES SUCH AS
HOBBIES, TV, SHOPPING, OR SPORTS. SOME CAN EVEN
RESULT TO BIBLE STUDY, CHURCH FUNCTIONS, CHURCH
EVENTS AND OTHER SO COMMONLY CALLED “SPIRITUAL
MATTERS”
23. • IT IS IMPORTANT FOR ALL MARRIED PEOPLE TO KNOW THAT
LAZINESS CAN KILL A MARRIAGE. IT INDICATES APPATHY, AND
APPATHETIC PEOPLE ARE NEVER WILLING TO PUT TIME AND
EFFORT INTO MAKINGA MARRIAGE WORK. AT THE END OF THEIR
LIVES, THEY LOOK BACK, THEY REALIZE THAT THEY FORFEITED THE
INTIMACY AND LOVE THEY REALLY WANTED IN MARRIAGE.
LAZINESS LEADS TO REGRETS REMORSE, PAIN AND AT TIMES
SEPERATION AND TO THE WORST, DIVORCE. REMEMBER
PROVERBS 24:30-34.
24. • 4. SHAME. ANOTHER HINDRANCE TO MARITAL HALING IS SHAME.
SHAME IS DIFFERENT FROM GUILT. GUILT IS DUE TO WHAT I HAVE DONE,
NOT DONE, SAID OR NOT SAID. BUT SHAME IS DUE TO WHAT I THINK I
AM. SHAME RELATES TO INDIVINDUAL. SHAME IS A SENSE OF BEING
UNIQUELY AND HOPELESSLY FLAWED[FULL OF DEFICIENCIES] . SHAME
LEAVES A PERSON FEELING DIFFERENT FROM AND LESS VALUABLE THAN
OTHER HUMAN BEINGS.
25. • PEOPLE CONTROLLED BY SHAME DO TWO THINGS IN TRYING TO
SOLVE THEIR HURTS OR PROBLEMS, FIRST THEY TRY TO BE PERFECT
IN ORDER TO EARN THAT WHICH THEY THINK THEY LACK. AS A
RESULT THEY RESIST CONFESSING THEIR FAULTS AND SEEKING FOR
FORGIVENESS. THUS HEALING BECOMES DIFFICULT. SECOND, THEY
STRIVE FOR CONTROL IN THEIR RELATIONSHIP. BUT A MIND SET TO
CONTROL CANNOT ACCEPT PERSONAL FAULTS, AND HANDLES
CONFLICTS FROM ONE SIDE ONLY, THUS BLOCKING MARITAL
HEALING.
26. • THE SHAME CONTROLLED PERSON NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND TWO
KEY BIBLICAL CONCEPTS. FIRST, IS GRACE. GOD’S GRACE IS
SUFFICIENT FOR ALL PEOPLE, OF ALL AGES, SEX. ONE SHOULD
NEVER BE ASHAMED OF WHAT HE/SHE IS;
SHORT, BLACK, FAT, SLIM. TO PAUL GOD SAID, “MY GRACE IS
SUFFICIENT FOR YOU…”2CORN 12:9. THE SECOND THING IS OUR
POSITION IN CHRIST. WHEN A PERSON RECEIVES CHRIST AS SAVIOR
AND LORD, THE INDIVIDUAL IS FULLY ACCEPTED AS A CHILD OF
GOD, WITH ALL RIGHTS AND PRIVILEGES. JOHN 1:11-13.
27. • SO BY RECEIVING GOD’S GIFT OF CHRIST IN LIFE, A PERSON IS
RELEASED ONCE FOR ALL FROM ALL SINS, PAST PRESENT
AND FUTURE. WE ARE RECEIVED IN THE BELOVED SON. WE
BECOME BELOVED OF GOD COL 3;12. THIS TYPE OF SPOUSE
IS THEREFORE FREE TO TALK AND DISCUSS WITH HIS/HER
PARTNER IN A WAY THAT ALL HURTS IN THEIR
RELATIONSHIPS CAN BE HEALED AND GOOD AND CORDIAL
PEACE BE RESTORED.
28. • 5. FEAR. FEAR IS PRIMARILY A RESPONSE TO SOMETHING THAT WE
PERCEIVE OVERPOWERING OR THREATENING OUR PEACE AND
LIFE. FEAR CAN EXERT EITHER NEGATIVE OR POSITIVE FORCE IN US.
IN MARRIAGES MANY PEOPLE KNOW THAT THEY NEED TO
RESOLVE THEIR CONFLICT, AND OFTEN THEY KNOW HOW TO DO IT.
BUT THEY ARE FRAID OF WHAT THE RESULT MIGHT BE. SO THEY
AVOID DEALING WITH THE ISSUE, DECIDING INSTEAD TO PLAY IT
COOL OR SAFE.
29. •HERE ARE THREE
FEARS THAT PREVENT
PEOPLE FROM
RESOLVING THEIR
CONFLICTS.
30. • A. FEAR OF FAILURE. ONE FEARS THAT HE/SHE MAY NOT SUCCED IN
SOLVING THE HURTS THEY HAVE IN THEIR MARRIAGE. SO THEY
CAN DO ANYTHING TO AVOID TALKING ABOUT THE ISSUES. BUT
THE PROBLEM HERE IS THAT FEAR AFFECTS COMMUNICATION AND
ONE FEELS THAT HE/SHE DOES NOT MEASURE UP TO THE SPOUSE’S
EXPECTATION. AS A RESULT ONE STAYS AWAY FROM THE OTHER
EMOTIONALLY AND AT TIMES PHYSICALLY. BY AVOIDING THE PAIN
OF FAILURE, YOU ALLOW YOUR HURTS TO PERSIST.
31. • B. FEAR OF REJECTION. ONE HAS DONE SOMETHING THAT HE/SHE
DEEMS NOT GOOD FOR THEIR MARRIAGE. OR SOMETHING LIKE RAPE,
ABORTION OR INCEST OCCURRED SOMETIMES IN THE PAST. THE WIFE
FOR EXAMPLE MAY WANT TO TELL THE HUSBAND OF THAT RAPE
INCIDENT, BUT FEARS THAT THE MAN MAY END UP REJECTING HER. SO
SHE KEEPS IT TO HERSELF. THIS CONTINUES TO HURT HER. BUT THE
TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS HONEST, AND OPEN ACCEPTING
COMMUNICATION NURTURES A HEALTHY MARRIAGE.
32. • C. FEAR OF EMOTIONAL INTIMACY. THIS IS A TERRIBLE FEAR. IT IS A
TERRIBLE BLOCK TO HEALING OUR HURTS. THERE IS A DIFFENCE
BETWEEN SEXUAL AND EMOTIONAL INTIMACIES. A COUPLE CAN
HAVE SEXUAL INTIMACY WITHOUT EMOTIONAL ENTIMACY. MANY
COUPLES SUCCED IN SEXUAL INTIMACY WHILE STERVING FOR
EMOTIONAL INTIMACY. SEXUAL INTIMACY IS EASY. IT CAN BE DONE
IN A MOMENT AND BE COMPLETED.
33. • BUT BEING CLOSE EMOTIONALLY TAKES CONSTANT WORK AND
COMMITMENT. YOU DEVELOP EMOTIONAL INTIMACY BY FREE AND
REGULAR COMMUNICATION, SHARING IDEAS, ISSUES AND
THOUGHTS TOGETHER, DOING THINGS AS ATEAM. GETTING TIME
TO BE YOU TWO, EXPRESSING ROMANTIC LOVE FREELY, AND
REGULARLY, READING GOD’S WORD AND PRAYING
TOGETHER, KEEPING NO SECRETS WHICH YOUR PARTNER DOES
NOT KNOW….
34. • NOW IN THIS FEAR, A SPOUSE MAY NOT WANT TO BE SO CLOSE TO
HIS/HER PARTNER BECAUSE HIS/HER WEAKNESS WILL BE EVIDENT
TO THE SPOUSE. HE/SHE MAY NOT WANT TO BE TOO INTIMATE TO
THE OTHER BECAUSE THERE ARE SOME THINGS HE/SHE WANTS TO
KEEP SECRET ALWAYS TO THE OTHER. THIS I TELL YOU WILL NEVER
BRING ANY EMOTIONAL INTIMACY IN YOUR MARRIAGE AND WILL
NOT ALLOW YOU TO SOLVE YOUR HURTS.
35. • LADIES, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LIVE IN YOUR MARRIAGE AS PEOPLE IN
PRISON, NEVER EXPERIENCING THE FULL ENJOYMENT OF A HUSBAND
AND THE WIFE. YOU CAN ENJOY YOUR MARRIED LIFE TO ITS FULL.
JESUS SAID, I CAME THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE LIFE AND HAVE IT IN ALL
ITS FULLNESS, JOHN 10:10. IF THERE IS A PLACE WHERE WE CAN HAVE
LIFE AND ALL IN ITS FULLNESS, IT IS IN OUR MARRIEAGES. WE CAN
HAVE IT FROM TODAY BY THE GRACE OF GOD. PLEASE DECIDE FOR
THAT AND NOT FOR ANY THING LESS, BY SOLVING YOUR HEART
STORED HURTS. BEGIN TODAY.
36. • ASSIGNMENT. THINK AND REMEMBER. DO YOU HAVE AN ISSUE
WITH YOUR SPOUSE THAT HURTS YOU AND YOU WOULD LIKE TO
GENUINELY SOLVE IT BEFORETHE END OF THIS YEAR? DO YOU
THINK IF YOU GENUINELY TELL YOUR SPOUSE WHAT HURTS YOU
HE/SHE WILL RESPOND POSITIVELY? AND ARE YOU WILLING TO
FORGIVE YOUR SPOUSE AND ACCEPT HIM/HER FULLY AND RESORE
YOUR EMOTIONAL INTIMACY SUCH THAT YOU REALLY FEEL
ATTACHED TO HIM/HER? THEN BEGIN DOING IT TODAY.