The document contains joking comments and remarks from various staff members at the GRASP office. It touches on topics like work responsibilities, meetings with grantees, budget issues, and finding time to relax during or after the work day. The tone is generally lighthearted and informal.

1. grasp

2. The Staff…

3. The Ground Floor

4. Cristina Cavarnali Finance Manager

5. Honestly, the car in front of the office is not mine. However, I brought, as you requested, my driving license.

6. Răzvan Horobeanu Accountant

7. Funny, I thought the suitcase was for me and the card for the girls, and it’s actually the other way round!

8. Mihaela Rogoz Accountant

9. Remember, after any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before…

10. Emilia Marinescu Receptionist

11. I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

12. Florin Beraru Driver

13. Hey! I’m not an airplane! Three of you may join me in the car, the rest of you… check out the railway station!

14. Cristi a n C iobanu Driver

15. Fasten your seatbelt! I’m gonna take you for the ride of your life! Around the garage, of course!

16. Mariana Neagoe Assistant Accountant

17. Life in the GRASP office is not easy… I’m sweating buckets after all this paperwork!

18. Costina Apostol Assistant Accountant

19. Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

20. Magdalena Fîrtat Office Manager

21. I’m not responsible for this Happy Hour! You said “cheap DJ”…

22. Iaşi Field Office

23. Adrian Pieptu Field Office Director

24. Sorry, I have to leave now… I gotta pay a visit to the Corleone family.

25. Gheorghe Ioniţă CP Specialist

26. Brothers and sisters, we won! The strike was successful! From now on we’ll have low fat milk for our coffees!

27. Gabriela Pipirig Administrative Assistant

28. Hey, watch out! I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.

29. Liviu Iacob Budget & Finance Specialist

30. Yes, I’m at work. Do you bring free beers for more than 5 pizzas?

31. Paula Talabă SFS Program Officer

32. Yes, they arrived! Call the management and complain, I don’t see any yellow bottles in the trunk. Damn caterers!

33. First Floor

34. Roger Vaughan Chief of Party

35. Of course, you can talk as much as you want, my translator is not here.

36. Benjamin Feit Deputy Chief of Party

37. The frame is nice, the picture is nice, but… where am I?

38. Simona Răileanu Project Coordinator

39. The physician told me that when the walls become orange I can go back home, ‘cause I have the workaholic syndrom.

40. Sanda Meresciu “ Doamna Sanda”

41. Vai, mam ă dragă, da ’ nu mai munciţi aşa mult!

42. Monica Cojocariu Human Resource Manager

43. A piece of advice: you can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

44. Claudia Mihuţ PAL Team Leader

45. We beat the 6 o'clock rush, and left work at noon! Now it’s time for my 2 calories cake!

46. Paul-André Baran DCB Deputy Director

47. Oops… it’s the mayor!

48. Daniela Drăghici Peer Networks Coordinator

49. You’re a man! That’s disturbing. I feel sorry for you, but you can’t come to the Tae-Bo. It’s only for women with attitude.

50. Raluca Lupu LG Associations Coordinator

51. Oh, no… not again! It’s the second time I get caught by paparazzis out of the office…

52. Mark Birnbaum Program Operations Director

53. Yeah, boss, I went there but there was no chick around. Oh, you mean Citizen Information Center (CIC)… Mmmh… well, I have to dress up, I presume.

54. Marcel Chiranov Monitoring & Evaluation Manager

55. This monitoring & evaluation stuff is bloody and tough… I just drowned two indicators but got beaten by a spreadsheet!

56. Doina Muşatescu Event Coordinator

57. Guess who? It’s me! Guess when? During the lunch break! Guess what? I can fly! Guess where? Out of the office!

58. Oana Tudor Project Coordinator

59. If you think I’m a TAMIS freak, you’re dead wrong. The beer cans are hidden under the desk.

60. Paul Negrilă IT Support Manager

61. I thought hardware meant the parts of a computer system that can be kicked…

62. Iulian Năstase Help Desk Assistant

63. I’m currently researching on the differences between wasting time at work before the Internet and wasting time at work with the Internet…

64. Special Guests...

65. Judy Hansen Development Alternatives, Inc.

66. Well, I love the way the GRASP office looks now… this is the conference room?

67. Michael Morfit Development Alternatives, Inc.

68. Judy told me you have you redecorated the office… Why am I still here?

69. Carmen Dumitrache ... Motorola

70. No, no, no! I can’t sell you low-price phones!

71. Cătălin Becic ...Connex

72. OK – I found my conditioner, my after shave, my low-calories sandwich, the bottle opener… but where’s my silver ring?

73. Sibiu Field Office

74. Peter Barta SFS Program Officer

75. Happy Hour? Why not Happy Week, or Happy Contract?

76. Elena Negrea CP Specialist

77. Gigi, go away, I’ve activated the webcam!

78. Flavia Bratu Administrative Assistant

79. Girl power! Release the calories! Freedom for the sugar-free!

80. Iustin Codreanu LED Specialist

81. Amazing! I already had 10 beers and I’m still cold!

82. Second Floor

83. Casandra Bischoff Policy Specialist

84. Hello, this is the Policy Reform Hot Line! You’re entitled to 30 minutes of listening to my opinions about a policy issue of your choice.

85. Eugenia Rotaru Policy Specialist

86. Writing name tags for the conference is a tough job, but somebody has to do it!

87. Viorica Dumitru Administrative Assistant

88. No, no, no! The red cards should be placed on top of the black cards!

89. Nick Enache FALR Coordinator

90. OK, I got the message. We’ll cut it short. Oh, and by the way… no more coffee breaks!

91. Laura Ştefan Legal Policy Advisor

92. Actually, 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

93. Monica Grecu Chief Translator

94. OK, although everybody asked for it, I am not in the mood to sing heavy metal.

95. Alexandru Molla Translator

96. Everything takes longer than you think. Especially when it’s something to be translated!

97. Irinel Dini Translator

98. Hey, don’t be afraid, we’ll replace on the flipchart the words “capital improvement plan” with “favourite beer brands”.

99. Anca Danţeş Voucher Manager

100. No, you can’t use this voucher at the mall…

101. Diana Ionescu Finance Officer

102. In this joint, drinks are brought slower than grantee financial reports…

103. Christine Jasper SFS Director

104. You can’t take that! That’s one of our grantees!

105. Alexa Babeş SFS Program Officer

106. OK, grantees! Smile for the photo, and then quickly get back to work!

107. Carmen Blăgoi Finance Assistant

108. This area definitely needs some metropolitan adjustments. There’s no Diet Coke around, and most certainly no loo!

109. Radu Florea SFS Program Officer

110. Previous night – spent on the train… Next night – to be spent on the train… That’s why I’m a certified trainer!

111. Oradea Field Office

112. Livia Banu Field Office Director

113. Before ending our conference, I am being told by our DCOP that somebody from the audience has placed his/her car in front of the office. Move it quickly!

114. Eugen Cozma CP Specialist

115. You don’t have to sign anything, Mr. Mayor, just read the damn thing!

116. Marie-Odette Bunta Administrative Assistant

117. The copier’s broken, the internet doesn’t work, phone is blocked… Everything is set, let’s go to the pub!

118. Monica Terean SFS Program Officer

119. In line with the recent funding cuts, we’ll organize our grantee quarterly meeting on the premises of this wonderful hospice!

120. Third Floor

121. Sam Coxson LG Initiatives Director

122. I hope it’s not true that no one is listening until you make a mistake…

123. Artur Lungu Assistant to the LGI Director

124. Casual Friday? So… I can take my tie off the neck?

125. Robert Gondi IT/MIS Manager

126. Jesus, I didn’t know that if it’s paid by GRASP, I have to eat it all!

127. Carmen Frunză Program Assistant

128. This is the result of a week of hard working in the office… I’m sleeping while I’m talking!

129. George Guess Finance & Budget Team Leader

130. Yeah, I understand you’re not happy with just an apple for lunch… try writing a new proposal!

131. Anca Voinea Finance & Budget Specialist

132. Hey, man, get a life! You walk around that empty glass for half an hour!

133. Mircea Tulea Finance & Budget Specialist

134. This is my new office, a representation of what I believe local economic development means!

135. Costel Todor Finance & Budget Specialist

136. Hello, my name is Costel, and I live in Sibiu. I have a slight lapse of memory, could you please remind me how do I relate with the gentlemen near me?

137. Mircea Alexandrescu Public Services Specialist

138. Training! I love it! Free meals, pleasant company, and sometimes a perfect place for a nap!

139. Mihaela Vrabete Public Services Specialist

140. Yahoo Messenger user name: “ zona ”, password: “ metropolitana ”…

141. Ciprian Căpâlnean Public Services Specialist

142. This is an area in need of public services e.g. a phone, to call for help!

143. Cristina Vladu Public Services Specialist

144. Pssst! Abort mission! Abort mission! Peter, do you read me? We’re in the wrong local government!

145. Nora Maderkova LED Team Leader

146. This is the LED consultant assigned by the county council?

147. Anca Socolovschi LED Specialist

148. Strange.. How come I always get the empty glass?

149. Kristina Creoşteanu Citizen Participation Team Leader

150. Don’t worry about them… they project images on the wall, they don’t play loud music!

151. Gabriela Căluşeru Municipal Credit Program Manager

152. Everybody’s in the lunch break… Am I the only one working around here?

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