Kathleen Bar-Tur, LCSW presented this to the American Psychoanalytic Association, Winter 2008. She discusses the role of Child Specialists & Coaches in the Collaborative Divorce process.
Jamie Thomas offers confidential strategic support services to healthcare managers through his company Second Opinion, LLC. His services include providing a secondary perspective on issues, projects, and strategic priorities through structured phone calls or more comprehensive reviews involving stakeholder interviews. Drawing on experience in various healthcare settings, his objective is to simplify thinking around particular issues or overall priorities through an additional viewpoint. Services are tailored to each client's needs and can range from a single discussion to an in-depth strategic review.
Is your organization looking to raise more money? Learn to keep your fundraiser happy. This interactive session is for any advanced Executive leading fundraising teams. You will gain valuable and practical tips on how to adopt shared values and assume a value-driven leadership style. You’ll return home ready, willing and able to adjust your organizational structure to better meet the needs of fundraisers while agreeing to realistic fundraising strategies, attaining fair systems and acquiring qualified people.
Prevention is better than cure – how reputation management helps crisis commu...CharityComms
Ed Coke, founder and director, Repute Associates
Visit the CharityComms website to view slides from past events, see what events we have coming up and to check out what else we do: www.charitycomms.org.uk
What is a collaborative divorce? It is a means of resolving your divorce through negotiations without going to court. It is a team effort, which both parties and their attorneys commit to working on with a mutually beneficial solution. You may want to choose collaborative divorce because it is less contentious than a contested divorce, it is less expensive, it gives you and your spouse control, and it allows for creativity. Sometimes the court system is not ideal in trying to negotiate a divorce.
The document discusses collaborative divorce and changes to Florida statutes regarding equitable distribution in divorce cases. It notes that collaborative divorce has around a 90-95% success rate, especially after initial emotions subside, as it saves assets and income. New statutes in 2008 clarified that jointly held property is presumed marital. The statutes also abolished special equity claims and outlined how to establish grounds for unequal property distribution, such as with short marriages. The document raises concerns about insuring children's lives during a divorce and criticism of some family law marketing practices.
Your Personality Test
Results
Personality Traits
Extraversion
44
Agreeableness
44
Conscientiousness 42
Neuroticism 13
Openness 38
The personality test that you've just taken is based on the Five
Factor Model of personality. Personality psychologists believe this
is a pretty good description of the broad traits or general areas
that go to make up a person's core personality. Personality isn't
set in stone, however, so keep that in mind if you see anything
you'd like to alter below. Teenagers and young adults should take
the below results with a bit of caution, as their personalities are
still under development (personality is generally pretty well formed
by one's mid 20's).
What do each of the 5 traits mean?
Hot Topics Today
Find help or get online counseling now
MENUMENU
Conditions Quizzes News & Experts Find Help Pro
� Search
Common Signs of
Someone Who May Be
Suicidal
1
Steer Clear: 7 Common
But Terrible Pieces of
Relationship Advice
2
Neurodiversity and
Fight-or-flight
Response: How
Occupational Therapy
Saved My Life by
Teaching Me to
Regulate My Nervous
System and the 16
Things I’ve Learned
3
Can Childhood
Emotional Neglect Make
You Passive-
Aggressive?
4
Extraversion - Energy, enthusiasm, socialable
Agreeableness - Altruism, helping others, affection,
friendliness
Conscientiousness - Control, will, constraint, dependability
Neuroticism - Negative emotions, nervousness
Openness to Experience - Originality, culture, open-minded,
intellect
Extraversion
This trait reflects a person's preference for certain
kinds of social situations, and how they like to
behave in such situations. People high in extraversion are
energetic and seek out the company of others. People low in
extraversion -- what some might call introverts -- tend to be
more quiet and reserved.
You scored really high on this trait, suggesting you have a lot of
energy and tend to enjoy most social situations.
Agreeableness
This trait reflects how we tend to interact with others,
especially in terms of our altrusim and friendliness.
People who score higher in agreeableness tend to be more
trusting, friendly and cooperative than others. People who score
lower tend to be more aggressive and less cooperative.
You scored really high on this trait, suggesting you are a very
friendly, cooperative and trusting person.
Conscientiousness
This trait reflects how organized and persistent a
person is in pursuing their goals. People who
score high on this trait tend to be more methodical, well-
organized and dutiful than others. People who score lower tend to
be less careful, less focused and more likely to be distracted from
tasks.
You scored really high on this trait, suggesting you're a well-
organized, focused and methodical person.
Neuroticism
This trait reflects the tendency for a person to
experience negative thoughts and feelings. People who
score high on this trait tend to be more prone to insecurity and
Join Over 215,000
Subscriber.
The document discusses a coaching pilot program launched by a UK law firm, IBB Law, to support clients going through divorce or separation. The program offers 4 virtual one-hour coaching sessions with a divorce and separation coach to help clients with emotional and mental wellbeing during this difficult time. The coaching focuses on setting goals and exploring solutions, not problems, to improve areas like communication, mindset, identity challenges, and moving forward. Previous clients reported benefits like improved performance, confidence, and perspective from the coaching.
Jamie Thomas offers confidential strategic support services to healthcare managers through his company Second Opinion, LLC. His services include providing a secondary perspective on issues, projects, and strategic priorities through structured phone calls or more comprehensive reviews involving stakeholder interviews. Drawing on experience in various healthcare settings, his objective is to simplify thinking around particular issues or overall priorities through an additional viewpoint. Services are tailored to each client's needs and can range from a single discussion to an in-depth strategic review.
Is your organization looking to raise more money? Learn to keep your fundraiser happy. This interactive session is for any advanced Executive leading fundraising teams. You will gain valuable and practical tips on how to adopt shared values and assume a value-driven leadership style. You’ll return home ready, willing and able to adjust your organizational structure to better meet the needs of fundraisers while agreeing to realistic fundraising strategies, attaining fair systems and acquiring qualified people.
Prevention is better than cure – how reputation management helps crisis commu...CharityComms
Ed Coke, founder and director, Repute Associates
Visit the CharityComms website to view slides from past events, see what events we have coming up and to check out what else we do: www.charitycomms.org.uk
What is a collaborative divorce? It is a means of resolving your divorce through negotiations without going to court. It is a team effort, which both parties and their attorneys commit to working on with a mutually beneficial solution. You may want to choose collaborative divorce because it is less contentious than a contested divorce, it is less expensive, it gives you and your spouse control, and it allows for creativity. Sometimes the court system is not ideal in trying to negotiate a divorce.
The document discusses collaborative divorce and changes to Florida statutes regarding equitable distribution in divorce cases. It notes that collaborative divorce has around a 90-95% success rate, especially after initial emotions subside, as it saves assets and income. New statutes in 2008 clarified that jointly held property is presumed marital. The statutes also abolished special equity claims and outlined how to establish grounds for unequal property distribution, such as with short marriages. The document raises concerns about insuring children's lives during a divorce and criticism of some family law marketing practices.
Your Personality Test
Results
Personality Traits
Extraversion
44
Agreeableness
44
Conscientiousness 42
Neuroticism 13
Openness 38
The personality test that you've just taken is based on the Five
Factor Model of personality. Personality psychologists believe this
is a pretty good description of the broad traits or general areas
that go to make up a person's core personality. Personality isn't
set in stone, however, so keep that in mind if you see anything
you'd like to alter below. Teenagers and young adults should take
the below results with a bit of caution, as their personalities are
still under development (personality is generally pretty well formed
by one's mid 20's).
What do each of the 5 traits mean?
Hot Topics Today
Find help or get online counseling now
MENUMENU
Conditions Quizzes News & Experts Find Help Pro
� Search
Common Signs of
Someone Who May Be
Suicidal
1
Steer Clear: 7 Common
But Terrible Pieces of
Relationship Advice
2
Neurodiversity and
Fight-or-flight
Response: How
Occupational Therapy
Saved My Life by
Teaching Me to
Regulate My Nervous
System and the 16
Things I’ve Learned
3
Can Childhood
Emotional Neglect Make
You Passive-
Aggressive?
4
Extraversion - Energy, enthusiasm, socialable
Agreeableness - Altruism, helping others, affection,
friendliness
Conscientiousness - Control, will, constraint, dependability
Neuroticism - Negative emotions, nervousness
Openness to Experience - Originality, culture, open-minded,
intellect
Extraversion
This trait reflects a person's preference for certain
kinds of social situations, and how they like to
behave in such situations. People high in extraversion are
energetic and seek out the company of others. People low in
extraversion -- what some might call introverts -- tend to be
more quiet and reserved.
You scored really high on this trait, suggesting you have a lot of
energy and tend to enjoy most social situations.
Agreeableness
This trait reflects how we tend to interact with others,
especially in terms of our altrusim and friendliness.
People who score higher in agreeableness tend to be more
trusting, friendly and cooperative than others. People who score
lower tend to be more aggressive and less cooperative.
You scored really high on this trait, suggesting you are a very
friendly, cooperative and trusting person.
Conscientiousness
This trait reflects how organized and persistent a
person is in pursuing their goals. People who
score high on this trait tend to be more methodical, well-
organized and dutiful than others. People who score lower tend to
be less careful, less focused and more likely to be distracted from
tasks.
You scored really high on this trait, suggesting you're a well-
organized, focused and methodical person.
Neuroticism
This trait reflects the tendency for a person to
experience negative thoughts and feelings. People who
score high on this trait tend to be more prone to insecurity and
Join Over 215,000
Subscriber.
The document discusses a coaching pilot program launched by a UK law firm, IBB Law, to support clients going through divorce or separation. The program offers 4 virtual one-hour coaching sessions with a divorce and separation coach to help clients with emotional and mental wellbeing during this difficult time. The coaching focuses on setting goals and exploring solutions, not problems, to improve areas like communication, mindset, identity challenges, and moving forward. Previous clients reported benefits like improved performance, confidence, and perspective from the coaching.
This document provides information about Julie Eckland, a licensed alcohol and drug counselor. It summarizes her qualifications and experience completing substance use evaluations in various clinical settings. It also lists the insurance providers she accepts and the counties in Nebraska where she provides services. The document aims to encourage individuals requiring a substance use evaluation to schedule an appointment, noting the importance of doing so as soon as possible. It briefly describes common reasons for requiring an evaluation and indicates the cost is $190, but may be discounted in some cases.
What is Trauma and Why Must We Address It? (Part I: Implications for Clinical...MFLNFamilyDevelopmnt
This 2 hour webinar will highlight various types of trauma and its impact on individuals and families. The presenters will provide an introduction to trauma-informed care and highlight benefits in utilizing this treatment approach for prevention and intervention work with both military and civilian families. The video to this presentation can be found here: https://learn.extension.org/events/1734#.VIemvr7yPKA
The document discusses mental health services for children in Wayne County. It aims to help children thrive by providing a system of care that is strengths-based, judgement-free, and supportive. Parents can choose from 18 community mental health providers to find one that meets their child's needs. Children, adolescents, and families receive services for issues like mental health, substance abuse, and physical health in a supportive environment where the child and family's perspectives are valued.
In this webinar, Michaele Beebe, Director of Public Policy and Research at United Advocates for Children and Families will discuss:
• What certification entails.
• SB 614, the Peer Certification bill.
• Peer certification accreditation for parents, family members, consumers & youth with lived experience in the mental health, alcohol/drug abuse, foster care, juvenile justice & special education systems.
Comprehensive Assessment and Intervention Planningactsconz
This document outlines the process for comprehensive assessment and intervention planning for clients. It discusses the overall purpose of assessment, which is to understand a client's wellness needs, set measurable treatment goals, and create a treatment plan. It also describes the different types of assessments, including screening, brief, and comprehensive assessments. The comprehensive assessment aims to understand barriers to a client's well-being and develop strategies to minimize barriers and enhance pathways. Key parts of the assessment include determining level of care, cultural needs, and developing a management plan and prognosis. The intervention planning considers medical, psychiatric, addiction, and social issues to create a treatment plan addressing predisposing, triggering, maintaining, and protective factors.
An Evaluation of the Effectiveness of Legally Assisted Family Dispute Resolution.
Presented at the FRSA National Conference, Brisbane Convention Centre, November 2015 by Ms Kristen Poel and Ms Jenni Dickson.
This document discusses the importance of marriage preparation. It notes that marriage is complex and challenging, and that unrealistic expectations, poor communication, and other issues often lead to marital dissatisfaction if not addressed. Premarital education and counseling can help couples learn important relationship skills, increase awareness of key areas like expectations and roles, and improve communication and satisfaction. Such programs have been shown to reduce divorce rates and increase marital satisfaction. The document outlines topics that might be addressed in premarital education and counseling, such as communication, conflict resolution, finances, and intimacy. It also discusses methods of assessment and delivery of marriage preparation.
This document provides information about a psychotherapy course (NURS 6650) that focuses on counseling groups and families. It describes a process group for children and adolescents who experienced bullying after their parents' divorces. One client, James, a 7-year-old boy, was not progressing as well as others. The therapist individualized James's treatment and reassured the group to make him feel more comfortable sharing. Additional context like James's young age in the group could impact his outcomes.
Director Manager supervisor consultant resumejjkamora
Jason Kamora has over 15 years of experience in clinical program development, management, and treatment. He has a Master's in Psychology and has held several roles including Clinical Director, Mental Health Director, and Therapist. He has a strong track record of successfully managing budgets, securing funding, and ensuring regulatory compliance.
1) It is an internal condition in counseling wherein clients are encouraged to work hard on their problem and consider perspectives that are not easy for them. This refers to caring detachment.
2) It is most easily seen through a convergence – or match – between what you say and do as a helper. This refers to genuineness.
3) These are defined as unique set of thoughts a person uses to process information, order one’s world and make decisions. This refers to personal constructs.
Coaching Special Needs is a brand new genre at the Academy for Coaching Parents International. From Caring to Coaching offers 3 reasons for training and receiving certification with ACPI Trainer Deborah Beasley, the founder of the Open Heart coaching model for regulation through developing relationships.
Through education I have been able to get something better than being a home care assistant, which at the time I did and still appreciate because it led me where I'm am today.
The document discusses efforts to standardize the profession of family-youth support partners through developing a certification process. It describes the Family & Youth Roundtable's certification process, which includes a standardized training curriculum, monthly group supervision, individual coaching, and advanced follow-up trainings. Completing this certification process demonstrates specialized skills and qualifications for the role of family-youth support partner.
This document outlines the need for a new ethical framework for genetic counseling in the modern genomic era. It discusses how genetic counseling has evolved from primarily focusing on education and autonomy to now requiring more guidance given the increased complexity, impact, and uncertainty of genomic information. The framework proposes six considerations for genetic counselors: whether counseling is pre- or post-test, test complexity, impact, the counselor-patient relationship, the counselor's role, and family interests. It argues counselors may need to provide more tailored recommendations and be less nondirective given these evolving factors.
Ethical dilemmas and overlooked issues in private practice ppKate McNulty
This document discusses various ethical dilemmas and issues that may arise in private practice for social workers. It covers topics like maintaining social work core values, defining ethical dilemmas, and the differences between ethics, values, morals, and laws/policies. It provides guidance on making ethical decisions using the E-T-H-I-C method and developing qualities like cultural competence. The document also addresses issues around promoting a practice ethically, maintaining client confidentiality, dual relationships, informed consent, scope of practice, record keeping, and closing a practice.
Family Group Conferencing - Creating New Normals for At-Risk FamiliesHeather Blades
A presentation by Charlene Berquist, PhD, and Heather Blades, MA, with the Center for Dispute Resolution at Missouri State University. This presentation overviews the Family Group Conferencing programs provided by our Center for at-risk youth and parents in recovery for drug and alcohol abuse. We provide community programs and offer basic and advanced training in family group conferencing. This presentation was provided at the Association for Conflict Resolution 2013 National Conference in Minneapolis.
When families are in crisis it is typically the “system” that intervenes to address such issues as child welfare, juvenile offending, drug and alcohol abuse, or other challenges. Often these interventions fail because they are not targeted in ways that honor the unique needs and diverse backgrounds of families, nor do they establish webs/networks of ongoing support. The Family Group Conferencing (FGC) process offers an alternative that brings together extended families (including relatives, family friends, and others) to develop a plan to address the family’s concerns. In this session the presenters will overview the FGC process and their experiences and research with FGC in a diverse array of contexts.
How To Become A Mental Health Counselor Palo Alto UniversityPalo Alto University
Learn how to become a mental health counselor in this presentation by William Snow, Ph.D.- Director of the Master's in Counseling Program at Palo Alto University.
May 8 2015 - Working Successfully With High Net Worth ClientsLiz Jorgensen
This document provides information about a professional symposium for clinicians on working with high net worth and prominent clients. The symposium will be held on May 8, 2015 at Caron New York from 7:30 am to 12:30 pm. It will feature several presentations on topics like cultural competency, treating high-functioning alcoholics, and intervening with clients who have substance abuse issues related to their success. The goal is to help clinicians develop skills for providing culturally competent care to wealthy and famous individuals struggling with mental health and substance abuse disorders.
More Related Content
Similar to Collaborative Divorce: The Role of the Coach & Child Specialist
This document provides information about Julie Eckland, a licensed alcohol and drug counselor. It summarizes her qualifications and experience completing substance use evaluations in various clinical settings. It also lists the insurance providers she accepts and the counties in Nebraska where she provides services. The document aims to encourage individuals requiring a substance use evaluation to schedule an appointment, noting the importance of doing so as soon as possible. It briefly describes common reasons for requiring an evaluation and indicates the cost is $190, but may be discounted in some cases.
What is Trauma and Why Must We Address It? (Part I: Implications for Clinical...MFLNFamilyDevelopmnt
This 2 hour webinar will highlight various types of trauma and its impact on individuals and families. The presenters will provide an introduction to trauma-informed care and highlight benefits in utilizing this treatment approach for prevention and intervention work with both military and civilian families. The video to this presentation can be found here: https://learn.extension.org/events/1734#.VIemvr7yPKA
The document discusses mental health services for children in Wayne County. It aims to help children thrive by providing a system of care that is strengths-based, judgement-free, and supportive. Parents can choose from 18 community mental health providers to find one that meets their child's needs. Children, adolescents, and families receive services for issues like mental health, substance abuse, and physical health in a supportive environment where the child and family's perspectives are valued.
In this webinar, Michaele Beebe, Director of Public Policy and Research at United Advocates for Children and Families will discuss:
• What certification entails.
• SB 614, the Peer Certification bill.
• Peer certification accreditation for parents, family members, consumers & youth with lived experience in the mental health, alcohol/drug abuse, foster care, juvenile justice & special education systems.
Comprehensive Assessment and Intervention Planningactsconz
This document outlines the process for comprehensive assessment and intervention planning for clients. It discusses the overall purpose of assessment, which is to understand a client's wellness needs, set measurable treatment goals, and create a treatment plan. It also describes the different types of assessments, including screening, brief, and comprehensive assessments. The comprehensive assessment aims to understand barriers to a client's well-being and develop strategies to minimize barriers and enhance pathways. Key parts of the assessment include determining level of care, cultural needs, and developing a management plan and prognosis. The intervention planning considers medical, psychiatric, addiction, and social issues to create a treatment plan addressing predisposing, triggering, maintaining, and protective factors.
An Evaluation of the Effectiveness of Legally Assisted Family Dispute Resolution.
Presented at the FRSA National Conference, Brisbane Convention Centre, November 2015 by Ms Kristen Poel and Ms Jenni Dickson.
This document discusses the importance of marriage preparation. It notes that marriage is complex and challenging, and that unrealistic expectations, poor communication, and other issues often lead to marital dissatisfaction if not addressed. Premarital education and counseling can help couples learn important relationship skills, increase awareness of key areas like expectations and roles, and improve communication and satisfaction. Such programs have been shown to reduce divorce rates and increase marital satisfaction. The document outlines topics that might be addressed in premarital education and counseling, such as communication, conflict resolution, finances, and intimacy. It also discusses methods of assessment and delivery of marriage preparation.
This document provides information about a psychotherapy course (NURS 6650) that focuses on counseling groups and families. It describes a process group for children and adolescents who experienced bullying after their parents' divorces. One client, James, a 7-year-old boy, was not progressing as well as others. The therapist individualized James's treatment and reassured the group to make him feel more comfortable sharing. Additional context like James's young age in the group could impact his outcomes.
Director Manager supervisor consultant resumejjkamora
Jason Kamora has over 15 years of experience in clinical program development, management, and treatment. He has a Master's in Psychology and has held several roles including Clinical Director, Mental Health Director, and Therapist. He has a strong track record of successfully managing budgets, securing funding, and ensuring regulatory compliance.
1) It is an internal condition in counseling wherein clients are encouraged to work hard on their problem and consider perspectives that are not easy for them. This refers to caring detachment.
2) It is most easily seen through a convergence – or match – between what you say and do as a helper. This refers to genuineness.
3) These are defined as unique set of thoughts a person uses to process information, order one’s world and make decisions. This refers to personal constructs.
Coaching Special Needs is a brand new genre at the Academy for Coaching Parents International. From Caring to Coaching offers 3 reasons for training and receiving certification with ACPI Trainer Deborah Beasley, the founder of the Open Heart coaching model for regulation through developing relationships.
Through education I have been able to get something better than being a home care assistant, which at the time I did and still appreciate because it led me where I'm am today.
The document discusses efforts to standardize the profession of family-youth support partners through developing a certification process. It describes the Family & Youth Roundtable's certification process, which includes a standardized training curriculum, monthly group supervision, individual coaching, and advanced follow-up trainings. Completing this certification process demonstrates specialized skills and qualifications for the role of family-youth support partner.
This document outlines the need for a new ethical framework for genetic counseling in the modern genomic era. It discusses how genetic counseling has evolved from primarily focusing on education and autonomy to now requiring more guidance given the increased complexity, impact, and uncertainty of genomic information. The framework proposes six considerations for genetic counselors: whether counseling is pre- or post-test, test complexity, impact, the counselor-patient relationship, the counselor's role, and family interests. It argues counselors may need to provide more tailored recommendations and be less nondirective given these evolving factors.
Ethical dilemmas and overlooked issues in private practice ppKate McNulty
This document discusses various ethical dilemmas and issues that may arise in private practice for social workers. It covers topics like maintaining social work core values, defining ethical dilemmas, and the differences between ethics, values, morals, and laws/policies. It provides guidance on making ethical decisions using the E-T-H-I-C method and developing qualities like cultural competence. The document also addresses issues around promoting a practice ethically, maintaining client confidentiality, dual relationships, informed consent, scope of practice, record keeping, and closing a practice.
Family Group Conferencing - Creating New Normals for At-Risk FamiliesHeather Blades
A presentation by Charlene Berquist, PhD, and Heather Blades, MA, with the Center for Dispute Resolution at Missouri State University. This presentation overviews the Family Group Conferencing programs provided by our Center for at-risk youth and parents in recovery for drug and alcohol abuse. We provide community programs and offer basic and advanced training in family group conferencing. This presentation was provided at the Association for Conflict Resolution 2013 National Conference in Minneapolis.
When families are in crisis it is typically the “system” that intervenes to address such issues as child welfare, juvenile offending, drug and alcohol abuse, or other challenges. Often these interventions fail because they are not targeted in ways that honor the unique needs and diverse backgrounds of families, nor do they establish webs/networks of ongoing support. The Family Group Conferencing (FGC) process offers an alternative that brings together extended families (including relatives, family friends, and others) to develop a plan to address the family’s concerns. In this session the presenters will overview the FGC process and their experiences and research with FGC in a diverse array of contexts.
How To Become A Mental Health Counselor Palo Alto UniversityPalo Alto University
Learn how to become a mental health counselor in this presentation by William Snow, Ph.D.- Director of the Master's in Counseling Program at Palo Alto University.
May 8 2015 - Working Successfully With High Net Worth ClientsLiz Jorgensen
This document provides information about a professional symposium for clinicians on working with high net worth and prominent clients. The symposium will be held on May 8, 2015 at Caron New York from 7:30 am to 12:30 pm. It will feature several presentations on topics like cultural competency, treating high-functioning alcoholics, and intervening with clients who have substance abuse issues related to their success. The goal is to help clinicians develop skills for providing culturally competent care to wealthy and famous individuals struggling with mental health and substance abuse disorders.
Similar to Collaborative Divorce: The Role of the Coach & Child Specialist (20)
May 8 2015 - Working Successfully With High Net Worth Clients
Collaborative Divorce: The Role of the Coach & Child Specialist
1. New York Center for Divorce & Family Mediation | (212) 866-0489 | Kathleen Bar-Tur, LCSW | nydivorce-mediation.com Collaborative Divorce: The Role of the Coach & Child Specialist Presented by Kathleen Bar-Tur, LCSW at the American Psychoanalytic Association, Winter 2008
2.
3.
4. New York Center for Divorce & Family Mediation | (212) 866-0489 | Kathleen Bar-Tur, LCSW | nydivorce-mediation.com Litigation: A Paradigm of Conflict Without Support Client #1 Client #2 Therapist #1 Therapist #2 Lawyer #1 Lawyer #2 Financial Analyst #1 Child Specialist #1 Child Specialist #2 Financial Analyst #2 Lawyer #2 Judge Court Appointed Legal Guardian
5. New York Center for Divorce & Family Mediation | (212) 866-0489 | Kathleen Bar-Tur, LCSW | nydivorce-mediation.com Collaborative Divorce: A Holding Environment Client #1 Client #2 Divorce Coach #1 Divorce Coach #2 Lawyer #1 Lawyer #2 Financial Analyst Child Specialist
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17. New York Center for Divorce & Family Mediation | (212) 866-0489 | Kathleen Bar-Tur, LCSW | nydivorce-mediation.com “ One of the ways I know I am not being effective is when I am feeling anxious or fearful…It is as important to the process that all of the professionals feel ‘safe’ as it is for the clients. The container holds all of us.” -Holly M. Hohlbein Counselor at Law Kirkland, WA
Editor's Notes
Introduce myself. MY INTEREST IN the way people get DIVORCE d began when I was hired to run groups for newly separated or divorced men and women for the Jewish Board of Family and Children’s Services. Running these support groups I saw people already traumatized by the loss of their partner, further traumatized by the often long, drawn out, and costly litigation process. I decided to become more involved and try to find a way to help these men and women. I became a MEDIATOR, THEN A Collaborative DIVORCE COACH.
Before describing the role of the coach and child specialist. I want to give you a an idea of effect divorce had on the participants in my groups. Normally high functioning people experienced any number of those symptoms listed on that slide. Those in the group who were already struggling in life were even more disabled by their divorce. Signs of Depression/Depression (point to them) Signs of Mania (point to them) Loss of Self Respect/Self Esteem - Sharing very personal information with everyone, “spilling”
. symptoms similar to A DIAGNOSIS OF Post Traumatic Stress: NIGHTMARES, INSTRUSIVE THOUGHTS, FLASHBACKS, THEIR Ability to function effectively in their lives was significantly impaired. IT WAS DIFFICULT TO WATCH PEOPLE IN THIS STATE BEING FORCED TO PARTICIPATE IN A TRADITIONAL ADVERSARIAL DIVORCE PROCEDINGS.
Litigation Model - Adversarial ISLOATED Mental Health Support System is Isolated from the Divorce Process if present at all Each Client hires their own experts Therapists Child Therapists Financial Analysts
Coll Holding Environment for the Divorcing Couple and their ch Provides a holding environment for the clients and their children. As Katherine has shown, the transparent nature of this process works against “side taking” behavior and paranoia. It requires co-operation. Communications form a safety net for the client.
Coaches and are not Therapists Time limited/goal oriented professionasl who are part of the entire divorce process from beginning to end. At the first meeting The Client is going to be asked to sign an agreement that clearly outlines the limits of the coach’s confidentiality. This document has been called many things, “ Stipulation to Retain a Coach” “Statement of Understanding” “Contract” S hare all relevant information with other members of the collaborative team. R equest a separate ‘permission to release information’ from the client to speak to anyone outside the team Refuse to release any session notes to any outside party or to testify as part of any legal procedure. R eport suspected child or elder abuse/neglect and to warn the appropriate parties if a client is a serious danger to herself or others as required by law.
Social worker, psychologist, psychoanalyst, etc. MANY OF PEOPLE GOING THROUGH A DIVORCE ARE SEEING PSYCHOTHERAPISTS OR ARE IN PSYCHOANALYSIS. IN MOST CASES PsychotherapiustsCOULD NOT OFFER THE SUPPORT THAT OUR GROUPS COULD OFFER OR THE TYPE OF INFORMED SUPPORT THAT A DIVORCE COACH
Assessment: Abuse, Sexual abuse, child abuse, addictions, mental illness. Determine if there are red flags that lawyers might want to know about. In this way serve as a resource for the team. Work One on One with Client to “create a sense of personal empowerment”. Prepare them to speak about important issues with their spouse. Educate Them: Tell them what to expect. Manage emotions. Clarify their thoughts. Define their goals and Communicate them. Be Assertive and Listen. Stress reduction Meet with th co-coach to get a better idea of what to anticipate in the coming 4 way meetings. Alert them to any problems you forsee in the future.
Note: Child specialists focus on different age groups—from infancy to teenagers. Important that the specialist stay within his/her area of expertise.
The child specialist’s only role is that of advocate for the child. He/she does not become involved in the parent dynamics—that’s for the coaches to manage. Neutral toward parents means that the child specialist doesn’t “take sides” in determining which parent is more suited to be with the children, but provides information and challenges parents to keep the children’s needs first. Clearly tells the children that the purpose of the meeting is to have their parents understand better what they are going through and listen to any ideas the child might have.
In five-way meetings with coaches, the child specialist helps parents understand what their child is experiencing, offers ideas on helping the child. Coaches, parents and child specialist then have a discussion—building on each other’s ideas, on ways to help their children.
Both parents are focused on their child; working together to come up with ideas that will help their child. They receive ideas from the child specialist, and the coaches. The five-way meeting is solely focused on finding solutions, not creating problems or supporting blaming.
Toronto - IACP Conference Many seminars and trainings in Working with the Difficult Clients - Difficult Clients are Clients with personality disorders