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Why you should let me touch your boobs.®
                                    Ass, face, and etc.


    Company Advertising Brochure




                           A subsidiary of LW Corporations®
Qualifications
Certified Female Body Inspector (FBI)

~8 years (PhD) of       experience

YONEX® POWER CUSHION Technology
YONEX® Enhanced Wrist Power [1]
Qualifications  cont


 I support all breast cup sizes.


A Cup          B Cup            C Cup




                                        ….

D Cup          E Cup            F Cup
Pros
• 100% cheaper than a therapeutic massage
• I might find that you have breast cancer and save
  your life (doctors are expensive)
• They look kind of lonely, bras can’t massage
• Releases oxytocin (love hormone) that you will like
• My hands are soft as SILK [2]
Cons
• You might bug me for more after your trial period
• You might not want to leave (3)
• You might feel too good
•    N/A
•    N/A
•    N/A
•    N/A
•    N/A
•   I think I forgot to mention you’d want more
•   I shall remind you that you’d want more
•   Why do I keep forgetting to tell you you’d want more
•   Just remember you’d want more
Research Analysis
                                0 min.– Trial offer beings
                                2 min.– Spidey senses tingling

                                4 min.– CENSORED (No data)
                                6 min.– CENSORED (No data)
                                8 min.– CENSORED (No data)
Your Happiness
                                10 min.– You have reached the
                                         climax of your mountain
                                        (Trial offer ends)

                                10 - 12 min. – Subscribers only

                                >12 min. – You have to leave to
                                            avoid addiction (4)


                 Time (mins)
Why consult our services?
Highest Rated Customer Rating 100 years in a row
Data from www.totallynotbiasedreviews.com/LWCorp



“... …Yes…MORE…OH YESS!!!!!”
      yes


-Silvie Li

…it speaks for itself
Our Company In the News
RECAP

Why say yes?                       Why say no?
•   Free                           •
•   High Quality Services          •
•   Highly Qualified Employees     •
•   Who can say no to this deal?   •
                                   •
                                   •
                                   It speaks for itself


                                                          See? I even spent 6 years of my
                                                          life preparing this 3D graph just for
                                                          you.
NOTES
[1] (Explanation) YONEX is a badminton brand and playing
badminton increases wrist power…

[2] “Soft as silk” to an extent.

[3] If “you might not want to leave,” you can stay if I don’t
have school the following day.

[4] Extremely addictive after 12 min. session, 1000 times
more than nicotine (without the disadvantages of
overconsumption).

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April fools.ppt

  • 1. Why you should let me touch your boobs.® Ass, face, and etc. Company Advertising Brochure A subsidiary of LW Corporations®
  • 2. Qualifications Certified Female Body Inspector (FBI) ~8 years (PhD) of experience YONEX® POWER CUSHION Technology YONEX® Enhanced Wrist Power [1]
  • 3. Qualifications cont I support all breast cup sizes. A Cup B Cup C Cup …. D Cup E Cup F Cup
  • 4. Pros • 100% cheaper than a therapeutic massage • I might find that you have breast cancer and save your life (doctors are expensive) • They look kind of lonely, bras can’t massage • Releases oxytocin (love hormone) that you will like • My hands are soft as SILK [2]
  • 5. Cons • You might bug me for more after your trial period • You might not want to leave (3) • You might feel too good • N/A • N/A • N/A • N/A • N/A • I think I forgot to mention you’d want more • I shall remind you that you’d want more • Why do I keep forgetting to tell you you’d want more • Just remember you’d want more
  • 6. Research Analysis 0 min.– Trial offer beings 2 min.– Spidey senses tingling 4 min.– CENSORED (No data) 6 min.– CENSORED (No data) 8 min.– CENSORED (No data) Your Happiness 10 min.– You have reached the climax of your mountain (Trial offer ends) 10 - 12 min. – Subscribers only >12 min. – You have to leave to avoid addiction (4) Time (mins)
  • 7. Why consult our services? Highest Rated Customer Rating 100 years in a row Data from www.totallynotbiasedreviews.com/LWCorp “... …Yes…MORE…OH YESS!!!!!” yes -Silvie Li …it speaks for itself
  • 8. Our Company In the News
  • 9. RECAP Why say yes? Why say no? • Free • • High Quality Services • • Highly Qualified Employees • • Who can say no to this deal? • • • It speaks for itself See? I even spent 6 years of my life preparing this 3D graph just for you.
  • 10. NOTES [1] (Explanation) YONEX is a badminton brand and playing badminton increases wrist power… [2] “Soft as silk” to an extent. [3] If “you might not want to leave,” you can stay if I don’t have school the following day. [4] Extremely addictive after 12 min. session, 1000 times more than nicotine (without the disadvantages of overconsumption).