1. 10E | Sunday, March 6, 2011 | St. Petersburg Times
REVIEW BY COLETTE BANCROFT
Times Book Editor
W
hat would you imagine a nice lady
from Memphis would do after retiring
from teaching high school English?
If you’re Elizabeth Stuckey-French,
you’d imagine her moving to Tallahassee, assuming
the name of a character from a Cold War science fic-
tion movie and plotting the revenge killing of a doctor.
And you’d make it into one funny story.
Stuckey-French, who teaches fiction writing at Flor-
ida State University and has published a novel (Mer-
maids on the Moon) and a short-story collection (The
First Paper Girl in Red Oak, Iowa), rolls out a darkly
humorous tale of suburban shenanigans in her new
novel, The Revenge of the Radioactive Lady.
The title character is that nice English teacher,
Marylou Ahearn. But in Tallahas-
see, where she has moved
into a pleasant neigh-
borhood called Can-
terbury Hills, she’s
known as Nancy (“Call
me Nance”) Archer.
It’s a moniker bor-
rowed from the “giant
(much taller than 50
feet) vaguely annoyed-
looking heroine” of
Attack of the 50
Foot Woman, a
notably awful
1 9 5 8 m o v i e
about a woman
who grows enor-
mous after con-
tact with radia-
tion and goes after
her cheating spouse.
Although she’s barely a 10th
that tall, Marylou feels they’re “sis-
ters in some strange way” because
of her own encounter with radia-
tion. While pregnant in 1953, she was
— without her knowledge or consent
— given a radioactive cocktail to drink as
part of a medical experiment. (Stuckey-French
based this part of the story on a real experiment con-
ducted at a prenatal clinic at Vanderbilt University.)
The daughter she was carrying died of cancer at age 8;
her once-happy marriage crumbled soon after.
So, half a century later, thanks to (what else?)
Google, she has tracked down Wilson Spriggs, the
doctor who urged her to drink those “vitamins.” Also
retired, he’s living with his daughter’s family in Can-
terbury Hills, where Marylou/Nance can stalk him
when she walks her corgi.
Although her plan is fueled by plenty of under-
standable rage, Nance is short on specifics, having no
experience in killing people. And she’s disappointed to
discover that Spriggs is in the early stages of demen-
tia and seems to have no memory of her connection to
the clinical trial that wrecked her life — which sucks
some of the sweetness out of revenge.
But Nance hits upon the idea of doing to Spriggs
what he did to her: ruining his family. She has seen
them and even met some of them on her dog-walk-
ing tours: Spriggs’ busy daughter Caroline and her
hard-working husband, Vic; beautiful Ava, a college
student; high school science whiz Otis; and gregari-
ous, athletic, 13-year-old Suzi. To Nance, they look like
a family right out of a storybook; why not give them a
dose of Spriggs’ own medicine?
Of course, Nance has no idea what life is really
like in the Witherspoon house, any more than any of
us knows our neighbors. Beautiful Ava and brilliant
Otis have both been diagnosed with Asperger’s syn-
drome, an autism spectrum disorder that affects their
social interactions and can lead to obsessions like
Ava’s fanatical interest in Elvis. Caroline is stressed
out and depressed over caring for them as well
as for her father, a state of exhaustion
that’s intensified by the fierce onset
of menopause. Vic, who has his
own obsession with hurricanes,
is feeling so shut out by his family
that he’s flirting dangerously with
a co-worker. And Suzi is so over-
whelmed by trying to be the
perfect kid she’s ready
to run away.
Stuckey-French
deploys a lot of
dark materials
in this book: not
just Nance’s tragic
losses but the With-
erspoons’ fracturing
marriage and their chil-
dren’s disabilities, not to
mention sexual preda-
torsandkillerstorms.
And that nuclear
breeder-reactor
Otis is secretly
building in the
shed out back?
That can’t end well.
Not necessarily
the stuff of comedy, but
Stuckey-French makes her
domestic satire work pre-
cisely by not backing away from its darkness — and
also by giving us characters who are complex and
believable enough to stay with even when the going
gets weird. She shows a sure hand with characters
across a range of ages — from the Witherspoon kids,
who are real, self-conscious, terrifyingly heedless teen-
agers, to Nance, with her occasional cluelessness and
long-honed survival skills.
Just as we come to know the Witherspoons, so does
Nance. Her petty plans to annoy Caroline and Vic by
getting Ava interested in getting on America’s Next
Top Model and cajoling Suzi to attend a megachurch
have unexpectedly dreadful consequences. While Car-
oline tries to unravel Nance’s true identity, Nance her-
self is scrambling to undo her revenge — and discov-
ering her own feelings about the family.
Not that revenge isn’t taken, but it finds its true
objective. And somebody ends up planning a wedding
at Graceland.
Colette Bancroft can be reached at cbancroft@sptimes.com
or (727) 893-8435.
RADIOACTIVE FALLOUT AND DYSFUNCTIONAL
RELATIONSHIPS REACT FOR A FUNNY HUMAN STORY.
NUCLEAR
FAMILY
The Revenge
of the
Radioactive
Lady
ByElizabeth
Stuckey-French
Doubleday,
336pages,$25.95
Meet the
author
TheUniver-
sityofSouthFlorida
Departmentof
EnglishandEnglish
GraduateAsso-
ciationpresent
ElizabethStuckey-
French,reading
fromhernewnovel
at7p.m.Tuesday
inRoom3704,Mar-
shallStudentCenter,
USF,4202EFowler
Ave.,Tampa.
iStockphoto.com,
Times illustration
ThePoetryColumn
Ilovepoemsthatcelebratefamilies,andhere’sa
fineonebyJoyceSutphenofMinnesota,apoetwho
haswrittendozensofpoemsI’dliketopublishinthis
columnifthereonlywereweeksenough.—Ted
Kooser,U.S.poetlaureate2004-06
The Aunts
Ilikeitwhentheygettogether
andtalkinvoicesthatsound
likeappletreesandgrapevines,
andsomeofthemwearhats
andgotoArizonainthewinter,
andtheyallliketoplaycards.
Theywillalwaysbetheones
whosay“Itistimetogonow,”
evenaswelingeratthedoor,
orstandbythewaitingcars,they
remembersomeone—anunclewe
neverknew—andsigh,all
ofthemtogether,likewind
intheoaktreesbehindthefarm
wheretheygrewup—aplace
Iremember—especially
thehenhouseandthesoft
cluckingthatfilledthesunlityard.
American Life in Poetry is made possible by the Poetry
Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of
Poetry magazine. Poem copyright ©2010 by Joyce Sut-
phen from her most recent book of poetry, “First Words,”
Red Dragonfly Press.Unsolicited manuscripts are not
accepted.
BookTalk
St.Petersburg’sCityofWritersorganizationwill
presentadiscussionaboutestablishingaWriters
HallofFameforthecity.PresentersRayArsenault,
RoyPeterClark,RoxanneFay,TomHallock,
AlesheaHarris,NarcisoHidalgo,HeatherJones,
JeffKlinkenbergandPeterMeinkewilldebate
thefirstslateofnomineesforthehall(AlvarNuñez
CabezadeVaca,SalvadorandGalaDalí,JohnHope
Franklin,JackKerouac,JimMorrisonandMarjorie
KinnanRawlings)at7p.m.MondayatthePoynter
Institute,801ThirdSt.S,St.Petersburg.
SafetyHarborPublicLibrarypresentsTammarStein
(Kindred)discussingandsigningheryoungadult
novelat7p.m.MondayattheWhistleStopGrill&
Bar,915MainSt.,SafetyHarbor.
SafetyHarborPublicLibrarypresentsLeeB.Savage
(AIMforJobs—YourCompleteJobSearchPlan)
discussingandsigninghisbookat6:30p.m.Tues-
dayatthelibrary,101SecondSt.
ScienceandtechnologywriterJamesGleick(The
Information:AHistory,aTheory,aFlood)willdiscuss
andsignhisbookat7p.m.WednesdayatInkwood
Books,216SArmeniaAve.,Tampa
The30thannualFloridaAntiquarianBookFair,
featuringmorethan115vendorsofbooks,mapsand
otherpapercollectibles,takesplacefrom5:30to9
p.m.Friday,10a.m.to5p.m.Saturdayand11a.m.to4
p.m.March13attheColiseum,535FourthAve.N,St.
Petersburg.Admissionis$10fortheweekendor$6
forSaturdayorMarch13only.Forinformation,visit
www.FloridaBooksellers.com/bookfair.html.
OmaliYeshitela(OnePeople!OneParty!OneDesti-
ny!)willsignhisbookat3p.m.SaturdayatHaslam’s
BookStore,2025CentralAve.,St.Petersburg.
Notable
Making their own odds
Threenewmemoirsrecountthe
livesofmenwhoovercameenor-
mousadversity.
AgainstAllOdds:MyLifeofHard-
ship,FastBreaks,andSecond
Chances(HarperCollins)byScott
BrownistheMassachusettsRepub-
licansenator’sstoryofhisviolently
abusivechildhood,hiscareersas
anathleteandmodel,andhisriseto
politicalprominence.
HouseofPrayerNo.2:AWriter’s
JourneyHome(KnopfDoubleday)
byMarkRichardisthebeautifully
craftedmemoirofthefictionwriter
andjournalistwhoenduredaSouth-
ernboyhoodmarkedbyphysical
disabilityandfamilyturmoiland
emergedintoaremarkableadult-
hood.
IBeattheOdds:FromHomeless-
nesstotheBlindSideandBeyond
(Penguin)byMichaelOher,with
DonYaeger,isamemoirbythe
youngmanwhosejourneyfromthe
ghettototheNFLwastoldinThe
BlindSide;herehetellshissideof
thestory.
Colette Bancroft, Times book editor
Nightstand
Brooke Burke
Burkewasthe2007champion
ofDancingWiththeStars,which
announcedits2011castMonday,
andhasco-hostedtheshowsince
March2010.OnFeb.1,Burke,39,
releasedherfirstbook,TheNaked
Mom:AModernMom’sFearless
Revelations,SavvyAdviceand
SoulfulReflections.Wespoke
withherbyphonefromherhome
inSouthernCalifornia,whereshe
liveswithherfiance,actorDavid
Charvet,andfourchildren.
What’sonyournightstand?
ThingsIWantMyDaughtersto
KnowbyAlexandraStoddard,and
IalsohaveacopyofWordsThat
Matter:ALittleBookofLifeLes-
sons.It’sthebooktakenfromthe
first10yearsofOprah’smagazine.
HaveyoureadAlexandraStoddardbefore?
Yes,she’sgotabeautiful,positivephilosophyonliving.
Howfarbackdoesyourinterestinwritingbooksgo?
Myinterestcameabouttwoyearsago.Actually,thebookcameoutofmyblog-
ging,somethingthatIstartedabouttwoyearsago.Irealizedhowtherapeutic
itis,particularlyforwomentobepartofsuchacommunity,andthebookgrew
fromthat.
Piper Castillo, Times staff writer
Getty Images
Bestsellers
Rankingsforbookssoldinbothprintandelectronic
formatsfortheweekendedFeb.12,accordingtothe
NewYorkTimes.(Advice,how-toandmiscellaneous
booksareprintsalesonly.)
Fiction
1.Alone(LisaGardner)Asurvivorofabductionmay
havetrickedapolicesniperintokillingherhusband.
2.TickTock(JamesPattersonandMichaelLedwid-
ge)Detectiveenlistshelptosolvearashofcrimes.
3.TheGirlWiththeDragonTattoo(StiegLarsson)
Ahackerandajournalistinvestigatethedisappear-
anceofayoungwoman40yearsearlier.
4.WaterforElephants(SaraGruen)Veterinarystu-
dentandanelephantsaveaDepression-eracircus.
5.TheGirlWhoPlayedWithFire(StiegLarsson)A
hackerbecomesamurdersuspect.
Nonfiction
1.Unbroken(LauraHillenbrand)Olympicrunner’s
storyofsurvivalasaprisonerinWorldWarII.
2. HeavenIsforReal(ToddBurpowithLynnVin-
cent)Afatherrecountshis3-year-oldson’sencoun-
terwithJesusduringanemergencyappendectomy.
3.KnownandUnknown(DonaldRumsfeld)The
formerdefensesecretary’smemoir.
4.DecisionPoints(GeorgeW.Bush)Theformer
president’smemoir.
5.Cleopatra(StacySchiff)TheMacedonian-Egyp-
tianqueenwasambitiousandformidablyintelligent.
Advice, how-to and miscellaneous
1.TrueYou(JanetJacksonwithDavidRitz)Super-
starsharesherstrugglestobecomecontented.
2.The4-HourBody(TimothyFerriss)Adietandfit-
nessbookfromtheauthorofThe4-HourWorkweek.
3.Veganist(KathyFreston)Acaseformovingtoa
whole-foods,plant-baseddiet.
4.TheInvestmentAnswer(DanielC.Goldieand
GordonS.Murray)Questionsinvestorsshouldask.
5.StraightTalk,NoChaser(SteveHarveywith
DeneneMillner)Adviceonhowtofind,keepaman.
Coming next week, a review that takes a look at a wide range of
classic and contemporary fiction from Ireland in The Granta Book
of the Irish Short Story.
literature No fourth Lisbeth Salander novel, but Seven Stories Press in
June publishes There Are Things I Want You to Know About Stieg
Larsson and Me by the late author’s partner, Eva Gabrielsson.