2. In the beginning there was The Great Moose and
the infinite emptiness. The Great Moose became
aware and thus the Great Moose’s first creation
came into existence (his thoughts) He then
formed of the concept of existence and realized
there was nothing but him and upon realizing
this emotions were born in the Great Moose’s
mind and thus his second creation (emotion)
came into being but still within and a part of The
Great Moose.
3. The Great Moose then grew wary of the
emptiness and longed for something outside of
his self but he knew only of himself as thoughts
and emotions were created by The Great Moose
but still a part of him. So he took the idea of self
and from that created beings in his image. He
called these beings Moose and they were his
children, as they were not the original being and
physically separate The Great Moose’s children
were imperfect but despite this he was pleased
with what he had created.
4. However his children were also displeased with
the sea of the emptiness and demanded of their
father, The Great Moose, something more. So the
Great Moose took the emotion of love for his
children and from it created Time and Space.
From Anger he created the Sun and the stars.
From Joy he created the planets. From Sadness
he created the great bodies of water found on
Earth and Canada. And from the waters of both
planets arose life not in the image of The Great
Moose.
5. From these life sprang many forms of life and the
two planets were eventually filled with these
creatures. Great Moose’s children then
descended onto the two planets and inhabited
them. On the planet Canada no beasts ever
evolved beyond small creatures similar to
salamanders and frogs found on Earth. Plant-like
lifeforms also grew and became abundant on the
planet Canada and grow to enormous size.
6. On Earth however the beasts grew large and
fierce. Some of these beasts began hunting the
Moose and so The Great Moose created a beast
to rule over all the other creatures of Earth and
gave them a set of rules by which they should
live. These rules are referred to as the Moose
Commandments.
7. The Moose Commandments
• Thou shall protect the Moose.
• Praise The Great Moose in everything you do.
• Thou shall not lay with a Moose as you would a human.
• Watch over the beasts and plants as their guardians.
8. Aside from the Moose Commandments we were also
given some minor rules and rituals for daily life.
• Upon the death of a Moose you are not to lay a hand on the
corpse. It must return back into the land in the way nature
intended.
• Upon the death of a human they are to be placed in a box made of
cedar face down and that box put in the ground 7 feet below the
surface and then covered back with the soil dug out.
• Disputes between humans are to be decided by way of syrup
chugging contests.
• When a child is born be it Moose or man an offering of maple
syrup is to be burned at the Alter of Antlers (A small alter found in
the home of every Moosalum.)
9. The Moosalums lived by these rules for many generations
until the teachings of Leroy Jenkins which taught us that
there are now more commandments put forth by the
Great Moose after witnessing the acts of Cling Clang.
• Love and protect your fellow man.
• Thou shall not cut down maple trees.
• 20 gallons of Maple syrup are to be collected and burned as an
offering to The Great Moose every day at the Great Alter of Cage
by the Head Moose Priest.
10. If we remain faithful to our duties to the
Moose and abide by the rules set forth by
The Great Moose we will be reborn as
Moose on the Planet Canada and live in
harmony with nature alongside The Great
Moose’s children.
11. Daily Ritual
Every day followers of Moosianity are to
go out into the forest and collect sap from
a maple tree and bring it back to their
home where it is burned on a Moose alter
as an offering to The Great Moose.
Besides this there are no specific daily
rituals and followers are to simply do what
is best for the herd of Moose they watch
over and do it to the best of their ability.
12. Weekly Ritual
Once a week on Friday Moosalums go to
the local Moose Temple and report to the
Keeper of Records on the status of their
herd. After everyone has reported their
status they come together for a feast of
Maple Syrup and Salad.
13. Bi-yearly Ritual
Twice a year, once on April 20th and once
on August 20th all the Moosalums gather
at their regional temple and take part in
the Festival of Antlers and drink
fermented Maple Syrup and dance naked
around a large mound of beaver pelts
which they then light on fire and burn as
an offering to The Great Moose.
15. Positions in Moosianity
Mother: This position is appointed by the Grand Mother
of the region and is responsible for helping and advising
new and/or troubled parents, helping with moose births
if there are complications and overseeing Coming of Age
rituals. This position is held with high regard.
Grand Mother: This is a position appointed by the Head
Priest of the regional temples. She is assigned to care for
and raise orphaned Moosalums. She lives in the temple
and acts as a Mother for the orphans who are raised
there. This position is held with very high regard and is
usually held by a fairly old woman who has raised many
children of her own who have grown to be model
Moosalums though it is not unheard of for younger
women who have had no children of their own to be
selected if they are deemed fit to take the position.
16. Positions in Moosianity
Temple Head: This person acts as the head priest of
temples and is elected by the members of that temple
once every two years. They advise followers who are
troubled or have questions and give sermons once a
week before the feast.
Keeper of Records: A young Moosalum, after their
coming of age, is appointed as Keeper’s Apprentice by
the current Keeper. When they are appointed they act as
an apprentice to the current Keeper until he dies at
which they take over as The Keeper of Records until their
own death and are responsible for the appointing of
their apprentice, Keeping records for the local temples,
assigning herds, keeping a record of the weekly reports
and advising the Temple Head.
17. Positions in Moosianity
Overseer: This position is appointed by the head priest at the
Regional temple and includes duties such as planning and
orchestrating large regional events such as the bi-yearly ritual.
Counsel of Moose: This is a group of 20 men and women who
are comprised of the leaders of the 20 largest temples. This
group acts as a sort of court and their duty is to determine the
guilt of individuals and groups and to determine what action
should be taken. Other duties include advising the Rack
Master.
Rack Master: Title held by the head priest of the Temple of
Racks which is the largest Moosianity temple. He can
overturn decisions made by the Counsel of Moose but mostly
functions as a figurehead.
18. Temples
Local: Usually comprising of no more than 200 people these
temples normally comprise of a simple building with a large
room for worship and the feast and several smaller rooms
which acts as offices.
Regional: A large temple which is comprised of a large
building with a huge room used for various gatherings, various
small rooms used for offices, a big room used as the Records
Library which acts as a the storage house for all the region’s
Keepers of Records and a big field where the bi-yearly
ceremonies are held and a mansion which houses the
Mother and the children which she cares for.
Temple of Racks: The international temple and largest
temple. It is where the Rack Master lives, the Counsel of
Moose meet and holds a similar function to that of the
Vatican in Catholicism.