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Comedy sketches sscript2
1. Three scripts for Stupendous
By Faith Howley
3 Orchard lane
Chester
WA6 6FG
faith1@gmail.com
2. INT . SHOPPING CENTRE - DAY
1. L.S A typical Saturday afternoon at a busy shopping
centre. The centre is filled with Saturday shoppers.
2. L.S We see the large glass automatic door.
3. M.S TWO MEN average height dressed in black with
balaclavas covering their face, are in shot stood
with their backs to the wall.
MAN ONE
Right, 'you ready?
MAN TWO
Yeah, come on let's just GoO.
MAN ONE
Now? right you go first I'll
follow.
MAN TWO
Okay quick go, it's the first
shop on the left.
4. L.S The men sneak into the shopping centre creeping
with their backs to the wall.
INT. DRUG/HEALTH STORE - DAY
5. M.S The men enter through the door
6. L.S They approach the first aisle. Other shoppers
notice them, startled by their black clothing, and
thuggish appearance they scream.
7. C.U Of the men's hands as they grab some items off
the shelf.
MAN ONE
Yeah that one there, grab it.
8. M.S Shot shows the robbers, they have gained the
attention of the shop workers. CAMERA PANS to show
everyone is now scared and frozen around the shop.
CONTINUED
Page 1
3. Everybody is staring at them anticipating their next
move.
MAN TWO
Right now let's get out of
here.
9. L.S The men are surrounded by scared and bemused
shoppers and now the SECURITY GUARD appears, A small
slightly overweight man in his late fifties, wearing a
typical security uniform with a hat. He is braced and
ready to attack the robbers. He has his back to the
camera.
MAN TWO
They've seen us, we're
surrounded!
MAN ONE
Quick that way. Go GO!
10. L.S They run out of the aisle and through the shop
toward the checkout, CAMERA TRACKS them.
11. O.T.S of Man One as the Security Guard is just about to
make a move.
12. M.S the robbers stop running as they get to the check
out and casually walk to the 'queue here' sign.
13. L.S Of the shoppers and Security Guard as they fall
silent.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Cashier number three please.
14. M.C.U Over the shoulder shot of the Men who casually
walk through barriers in the queue and get to the
checkout, where a terrified and trembling YOUNG CASHIER
a small girl in her late teens, is stood. CAMERA PANS
to show the Young Cashier’s face.
15. M.S The baffled security guard approaches
SECURITY GUARD
Page 2
CONTINUED
4. Woah woah! What are you doing ?
16. C.U Of Man One's face.
MAN ONE
Oh, what? This?
17. E.C.U Of the tube in Man One's hand as he gestures
toward it.
MAN ONE
Yeah.. my acne has really been
playing up, I've been hiding under
this mask for days.
18. C.U He lifts up his balaclava to reveal a sheepish
teenage boy with acne, glasses and braces.
FADE OUT
FADE IN
EXT. BUS STOP - DAY
1. L.S FOUR PEOPLE are standing at a bus stop, Three
men, young professionals, late twenties, dressed in
suits. And a middle aged woman wearing a dress suit
she is of small stature, and holds a briefcase in
front of her with both hands on the handle.
2. E.L.S Of the street, in shot something is
approaching in the distance, it looks small and
distant.
3. M.S CAMERA PANS Focusing back to the people at the
bus stop, they look bored with an exasperated
expression.
4. M.C.U, of A YOUNG MAN dressed in jeans and a Blue t-
shirt, he joins the queue and is smaller than the
other men. He is on his phone with ear phones in. He
walks up and joins the people at the bus stop,
looking up to nod at the suited business man to his
left in acknowledgement.
Page 3
CONTINUED
5. 5. E.L.S Now visible is the slowly approaching vehicle
coming closer, becoming visible and showing it is a
small mobility scooter driven by an ELDERLY MAN,
wearing a tweed jacket and flat cap, with rounded
glasses. As the scooter comes closer a quiet HUMMING
NOISE becomes apparent.
6. M.S Of the scooter on the road CAMERA PANS back to
the people still waiting at the bus stop, the woman
checks their watch and sighs impatiently.
7. E.L.S We now see the people at the bus stop from the
other side of the road. The scooter comes into shot
from the left side, approaching the people at the bus
stop, who are also, have the same bored emotionless
expression on their faces.
8. L.S Side angled shot with the only thing visible the
people at the bus stop. A few seconds into the shot
they are splashed with an over exaggerated wave.
Looking shocked they stand there soaked.
9. L.S Of the road Finally we see the elderly man who
carries on driving unfased with a small smirk on his
face.
FADE OUT
FADE IN
INT. SUPERMARKET - DAY
1. L.S A supermarket checkout, A MALE SHOPPER of average
height late forties, with greying hair, wearing jeans
and a t-shirt approaches the checkout with a basket
full of shopping, he puts his basket down on the
self-service and starts to scan his items.
2. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service
screen.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Welcome, do you have your own
bags?
Page 4
Page 1
Page 1
CONTINUED
6. 3. C.U Side shot of the male shoppers hands as he taps
'no' on the screen the voice on the machine sighs.
4. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service
screen.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Ugh, one of them are we?
5. M.S Of the male shopper who is baffled, but shrugs off
the comment and scans his first item.
6. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service
screen, As he scans his shopping.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Come on hurry up I have places to
be.
Ha low fat yogurt, who are you
trying to kid.
Cheesecake, more like it.
Ahhhh so that's where all the pies
went.
7. L.S The male shopper looks around to see if anybody
else has noticed the insults, CAMERA PANS as he calls
over one of the shop assistants.
MALE SHOPPER
Excuse me I think there's
something wrong with the machine,
it keeps errm insulting me.
8. M.S The FEMALE SHOP ASSISTANT, A small middle aged
woman, wearing typical supermarket uniform, very curly
hair and round glasses, looks at him patronisingly and
sighs.
FEMALE SHOP ASSISTANT
Page 5
CONTINUED
7. Erm okay sir, no I don't think
there's anything wrong there you
go, that should be fine.
9. C.U Of The Female Shop Assistant's hand as she press's
several buttons on the screen, CAMERA PANS as she walks
away.
10. M.S Side Shot as the man continues to scan his
shopping.
11. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service
screen.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Haha nice try mate.
MALE SHOPPER
SHUT UP.
12. L.S The other shoppers look over to the Male Shopper
who appears to be screaming to himself and everyone
gives him a bemused look and whispers to each other.
13. M.S Side Shot of Male Shopper.
MALE SHOPPER
RIGHT.
14. M.S The Male Shopper walks out of shot and reappears
with a chainsaw, pulls goggles over his head and saws
the machine in half, and walks away unfazed.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Ooohhh someone's touchy.
FADE OUT
Page 6
CONTINUED