2. 2 3
Table of Contents
Dedication and Acknowledgements 2
Table of Contents 3
Background 4
Introduction 5
Stories from the Ekangala Community Action Group 6
I have been down: Mpho Chavura 7
Life is like a Pencil: Nthabiseng Sethunya 8
I was lost but now I am found: Musawenkosi Ntuli 9
Live like a Phoenix: Mpho Chavura 12
I love my life: Mpho Chavura 13
Life is a Roller Coaster: Mpho Chavura 14
I am number 27: Musawenkosi Ntuli 15
Purpose in this world: Musawenkosi Ntuli 16
Game Two (2) Peace and Harmony: Bongane Shabalala 17
My life is an achiever and a helper: Thapelo Abie Khalipha 18
I am me and I am no longer at the bottom: Simon Gumpe 19
The incubator: Nthabiseng Sethunya 21
Love Pain in both Men and Women: Patricia Mahlangu 22
I did not know now I know: Patricia Sibanyoni 23
Mother love letter: Patricia Sibanyoni “Lady P” 24
The best of me: Penny Forever 25
Life is a highway: Xolani Gladwin Khumalo 26
I matter: Elizabeth Phala 27
The game nine peace and harmony: Bongane Shabalala 28
A Girl Who Is Lonely: Wendy Sibanyoni 29
My Case study dated June 2014: Elizabeth Phala 30
My Story: David Vincent Mahlangu 31
Community Awaken: Tsamme Mfundisi 32
The Inner Critic: Mpho Chavura 33
Overview of Work Carried out in Ekangala Community 34
Conclusion 35
“Healing for individuals,
families, leaders, institutions and
the whole society is no longer a
luxury or social service issue.
It is now a necessity and a security
issue. It is now an economic and
development issue. Any attempt to
ensure security, development and
stability of our country without
addressing our collective wound-
edness, is futile. Psychological
health is a priority, and it equals a
healthy community and
a healthy nation.”
Nomfundo Mogapi
Executive Director of the Centre for the
Study of Violence and Reconciliation
and clinical psychologist who specialises
in trauma.
Dedication and
Acknowledgements
This booklet is dedicated to the members
oftheEkangalaCommunityActionGroup
(EAG) who have suffered various forms of
violence, and have taken up the fight for
an end to violence in their community.
Their experiences (their stories and poems)
form the essence of this booklet — and the
basis for CSVR’s Psychosocial Wellness for
Effective Community Intervention model.
The development of this booklet has
been made possible through the financial
support of the Finnish Embassy, 1st for
Women and USAID.
CSVR would like to sincerely thank the
following people who played a critical role in
the production of this booklet:
• The Ekangala Community Action
Group, who took part in the work-
shops and delved deep into their past
and shared their lived experiences with
CSVR.
• Ekangala community stakeholders and
government institutions, who have tire-
lessly worked hand in hand with the
Ekangala Community Action Group
(and continue to do so).
• The Community Psychosocial Facilita-
tors from CSVR, who demonstrate on
a daily basis their commitment to this
project.
• Nomfundo Mogapi and Samantha
Stern, who facilitated the psychosocial
wellness workshops, and introduced the
Ekangala Community Action Group
members to skills to help them overcome
personal challenges and supported them
as they found themselves.
3. 4 5
Background
Twenty-one years after South Africa’s transition from apartheid to a democratic
regime, numerous types of violence (gender-based, youth, state/structural and
xenophobic violence) continue to plague our communities. Various communi-
ty-based strategies have been designed and implemented in an attempt to combat
the violence, but in most places it has remained unabated. In particular, insuffi-
cient resources and services have greatly thwarted community efforts to build peace
and achieve sustainable development.
Over the last ten years, the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation
(CSVR) has been working with Ekangala, Kagiso, the Inner City of Johannesburg
(with specific focus on Mayfair, Hillbrow and Yeoville) and Marikana to challenge
the different types of violence affecting these communities. In particular, our
work has involved setting up community action groups, which provide a platform
for individuals and community groups to work together in advocating for, and
implementing, violence-prevention activities.
Perhaps the most important lesson we have learned from our work with these com-
munities is that before one can effectively contribute to positive social change, one
must go through one’s own journey of healing. Sadly, society has taught many of
us to ignore the pain, injustice, discrimination, abuse and violations that we have
suffered. Psychologists explain that the greater pain is often not in the experience
of injustice, discrimination, abuse and violation itself, but in bottling-up an untold
story of pain or hurt; and that this contributes to the self-sabotaging beliefs that
drive our behaviour (which often involves hurting ourselves and others, especially
those we love dearly).
Against this backdrop, CSVR has refined its model for working with communities
so that it includes a psychosocial wellness training component. This component
encourages healing through a deeper understanding of ourselves and others, in-
cluding the telling of our stories. Our belief is that this type of integrated interven-
tion has a multiplier effect – it can bring about great positive change not only at an
individual level, but at the family and community (and even national) levels as well.
Introduction
This booklet is therefore a testimony to the fact that we all have powerful
stories to tell; and that when we tell our stories in a safe and supportive
environment, we can begin the journey of healing and transformation.
This booklet presents twenty-five stories and poems written by members
of the Ekangala Community Action Group (EAG) – young people drawn
from various community-based organisations in the area. These stories
and poems were gathered during a series of psychosocial wellness work-
shops, which took place between April and October 2014. They illustrate
the deep and lasting effects of psychological woundedness and the ways
in which woundedness contributes to the cycle of violence and conflict
in our communities. But most of all they are stories of strength, survival,
resilience and hope.
4. 6 7
I have been down: Mpho Chavura
I have been down, crushed and rated among the weakest link, drained, used and
pinned down by my failure moments and not regarding my greater moments.
I have been down, giving something to the ungrateful, negative, opposite minded
human beings who did not want anything to be my success and my ability to do
things differently.
I have been down, life put me down, and closed doors, fake friends appeared,
those ones I claimed to be close friends, trusted friends changed colours on me
and betrayed me.
I have been down and ended up accepting that I am nothing in the world, I told
myself “I can’t” and “I won’t” be heard because I am useless, mission less, vision-
less, bound to public villainess. My actions were driven by hard times pain and
torture. I have been spiritually broken, disconnected myself from good deeds and
mounted myself with bad characters like gangsters.
I have been down, but had to change when I understood that in order to sit down
and relax I have to stand up, face my fears and fight. Fight for what? Fight for what
must bring me peace and relaxation, harmony and understanding. I studied ways
that changed my nothingness to something. Now, where I am, I am in control of
my own actions, and I found inner peace. I understand that you can’t change pain-
ful past but you can change the perspective of how people see you.
Now I am on my knees thanking God that he sent me an angel. Those who thought
I was nothing, now they see me as a legend. I found my freedom and I am building
my world where people can speak my language.
Stories from the Ekangala Community Action Group
Ekangala is a black township situated in the western part of Johannesburg in the
Gauteng Province. The main economic activity in this municipality is coal mining,
which has been declining in the last ten years. As a result, this municipality is
characterised by high levels of unemployment; most people travel to Pretoria to
look for work. As is often the case, the young people are especially affected; there
are high levels of young people engaged in violence and crime, and alcohol and
drug abuse (Nyaope). The township also faces significant challenges with regard
to the development and maintenance of basic infrastructure and service delivery.
Lately, there have been a number of violent service delivery protests in the area.
Through the following stories and poems, the EAG members clearly articulate
the impact of their lived experiences and the different ways in which they have
expressed their trauma and woundedness. The writing and drawing of these stories
provided the EAG members with opportunities to reflect, challenge their assump-
tions and create new perspectives – important steps along the journey of healing.
This is most evident by the ways in which the group members described themselves
at the end of the training: “I am of value; I am worthy of love; I am important, I
am accepted; and I am in touch with my purpose”.
We salute the EAG members for their courage to walk the path of healing and for
sharing their lived experiences through this booklet.
5. 8 9
I was lost but now I am found : Musawenkosi Ntuli
I was in the world with no ground and sky
I was floating
Not knowing what to do
I was stuck up in my world of ignorance
Not wanting to know how to fix a problem that emerges at a certain stage
What I was doing was my concern
I was stuck to my wounded-ness
I was lost
I was stuck to people who did not impact my life positively
I hid behind the word “peer pressure”
At my lower level of school I was fascinated by the group of people
Who did not do good things?
I was convinced that in order for me to be really visible to people,
I have to be entertaining, or get out of the way by bothering teachers
and other learners
Then I was in the spot light
I was recognised
I was popular
I did not know what I was doing
I was lost in the shadow of darkness
The environment was working for me
I loved being in the middle of everything
I really felt good
But it all changed when I got to high school
Things were done differently in high school
I had to find my way in
I had to come with a new strategy of blending in the new community
Because of my fascination of joining wrong doers
Again I found a way of blending in another law breaking group
It was all about absconding classes and victimising other learners
Being out of the line of the school rules
The school I was in at that time
It was the worst of them all around the community of Ekangala
Being mostly inspired by Yizo! Yizo! the then popular local drama
group during 2006
Life is like a Pencil : Nthabiseng Sethunya
We use a pencil to draw and eraser to erase. When you draw, along the way you
make mistakes that need to be erased in order to proceed with the drawings. In
life we make mistakes and we have to let those mistakes go so that we can continue
living our lives, and the only thing to do is to learn from our mistakes.
There is a time when a pencil needs to be sharpened, in order to continue to
drawing. In life we face difficult situations which we cannot run away from.
In order to gain something you have to lose something. Definitely you will leave a
mark, and the mark depends on how you live your life, your behaviour and attitude
towards self, life and others. A good mark brings a huge change and good memories
in people’s lives. A good mark will be remembered forever, but a bad mark will
destroy and kill nations.
6. 10 11
I was a chairperson of the group at the age of 15
I was leading people from the age of 10 to 25 years of age.
Despite all the commitments I had that kept me busy after school
I really struggled to strike a balance between my social life and school work, until
I was blessed with the guy who did choral music, his name was David Gabangani
who showed me the light, and I was one of the huge rated at my school Lingitshudu
Secondary School.
That’s when I really knew what my life was all about
I was so in touch with my work both school and outside school.
After my Matric level in 2009, I was given with bursaries to do End User Comput-
ing at M&C College in 2010, the biggest years of my life and yes to the Africans at
large because South Africa was hosting the FIFA world cup.
At the college I still continued balancing my tertiary life and the TLOI.
I graduated at M&C College and I was awarded with my End User Computing
certificate
In 2011, I was at home doing my community work, later that year I was invited on
a re-launching of a Youth Desk, for a local Police Station.
I was then nominated to be the Chair person at the age of 19.
I got the opportunity to speak for the youth of Ekangala, travelling around Gauteng
meeting youth who have the same spirit as me. In 2012, I started working with the
Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconcialition (CSVR), facilitating dialogues
and conducting workshops on HIV/AIDS, Gender Based Violence and Youth
violence in the community.
In 2013, I got a Learnership for Nursing at S.G Lourens Nursing College.
It didn’t really get well with nursing, my heart was not there
But because I listen to my heart
I went to the principal and told him that my heart was not happy there and that
my calling is somewhere else in the community out there. She understood as I was
one of the promising students.
This is where I am today, pursuing my purpose with the Ekangala Community
Action Group with support from CSVR.
I was well known within my community for playing soccer and a member of
hip-hop crew named Ghost Riders.
This is where I met my life time friend Mpho Chavura and he was popularly
known as Scotch.
We rocked the movement of Hip-hop industry at Ekangala being highly inspired by
the life of American Hip-hop stars and their doings.
In 2005, I started to lift weights because I was fed up by people who were bullying
us around.
Because of my weight lifting and physical development I was nicknamed “Batista”
The name being formed the WWW superstar.
This name gave me attention, which I was seeking
I was lost in my sturdy body, seeking respect from anything I came across
Even though I was not really the fighting type
I would only fight if I had enough of somebody’s wrong doings to others.
Because of my mind of being creative,
I started engaging myself to an Art and Culture Group called “Hopeful Youth
Movement”
My primary school friend introduced me to the group. His name was William.
He asked me to give him a comedy drama to present it to the group.
I did as he asked but because of my curiosity of what was going on there.
When I got there I was really amazed of how people there, were so alive, so peaceful
and most of all how they were so in tune with their creative mind.
After doing my first acting where I was asked to play the role of an abusive child.
I got evaluated and got one message, I will never forget in my life.
The director said to everyone if you don’t pick up your socks this new guy will role
you all out.
Those words did not mean a lot to me then, but yet continued to haunt me.
In 2007, Hopeful Youth Movement was shut down, and I was really honoured
when most of the group members came and asked me to come up with an idea to
start another group.
Yes, it was started and it was the most powerful youth group in Ekangala
community.
We came up with a new name “The Light of Impumelelo” (TLoI)
I was the leader of the new movement
I was lost, but now I am proud
My calling of working with community started there.
7. 12 13
I love my life : Mpho Chavura
My life is the greatest!
With all the cycles of greatness
All the hard times and experiences
Those hard times and experiences build me day by day
To be the best man I can be
To be the legend the world can look up to
To be the greatest product of human kind
Everything that happened in my life
And everything that happens now
It all shaped, built and created my tomorrow
It all gave me the power to breath
And the power to say
I am proud to be me
Yes, I may not perfect, but I am trying to be
I will always be me, no matter what?
I love my life! I love my life
This is my life,
My greatest life
Live like a Phoenix : Mpho Chavura
Live your life to be the greatest
Live your life to be the legend
Live your life to be remembered
Live your life as the legend or the phoenix
“To be or not to be that is the question”
Do you stay down, when the world puts you down
Do you stay down, when things don’t go right
Do you stay down, when you have nothing to give
Rise from the ashes of disappointment
Rise from the ashes of your wrong doings
Rise from your ashes, even if there is no hope
Rise from the ashes of the negative mind
Rise from the ashes to be the legend
Be the change you want to see
A phoenix never dies, it lives on forever
No matter what happens, but it always gets up
Live like a phoenix and rise from your ashes.
8. 14 15
I am number 27 : Musawenkosi Ntuli
I am a legend of change in this world
I am recognition of a good nature
I am an individual, responsible for the next smile
I am the most important property of the world
Without me the world will never be the same
With me the world will not know humanity
I am an agent of change
I am the heart with openness to everyone
I am the gateway for knowledge
According to the Enneagramme, I am number two the helper and
seven the socialiser
With the two numbers together, I become number twenty seven
I am the number that brought freedom to South Africa
I am the number that brought joy and happiness
I am the hope of the world
I am the impossible to be seen possible
I am the legend of change in this world
I am who I am
Life is a Roller Coaster : Mpho Chavura
Life is a roller coaster with challenges
With all the ups and downs it brings
Life is a big unpredictable ride
A ride that keeps you captivated
It’s not about what you know
But it’s all about what you do
There is no expert for this roller coaster
One might say, “I am the best in what I do”
But in this roller coaster you get tears
Just in the middle of the smooth ride
You get confused while things seem easy
You get excited while things seems hard
What you do today will determine your tomorrow
Life is a roller coaster ride with no manual
It’s about the survival of the fittest and the strong
And the wire on the lime line or good and bad
This is my life
My roller coaster life
9. 16 17
Game Two (2) Peace and Harmony : Bongane Shabalala
My nine, my game is rounded by all numbers
I play the game of finding union
Peace and harmony is my place of joy
I easily interact with everyone
Separation and conflict is my challenge
I do not understand and I hate conflict
Stopping me when I am talking is a pain in my heart.
I am always on top of the game
I am dynamic in everything I do
Sweet and harmonious!
Life around a peace maker is good
I play my game calmly
I play for a receptive team and I feel good
I play for comforting and idealising the team
The proactive type and inclusive
Every talk is my talk; that makes me feel good
Every game is my game
All the numbers they need me to create peace and harmony
1 - I talk about the life of a reformer with a sense of mission
2 - Helper with help and support
3 - Achiever with the best
4 - Individualistic with uniqueness
5 - Investigators with high developed mind
6 - Loyalist with safe environment and deal with danger
7 - Enthusiastic with optimism, love of life,
8 - The challenger with energy, vision and courage to face life
But all of these just need me because I bring peace and harmony
Yes, I easily interact with everyone
This is who I am
So, this is my game.
Purpose in this world : Musawenkosi Ntuli
We are in this world
To meet others and be with others and enjoy ourselves
We are in this world to create opportunities, love and hate
We are in this world to laugh, cry and regret
We are in this world to encourage and discourage
We are in this world to make mistakes and be corrected
We are in this world to live life
That is why I am saying, let’s take care of ourselves and respect life.
10. 18 19
I am me and I am no longer at the bottom :
Simon Gumpe
It all started in 2005 as a young boy who was well disciplined scared of his parents,
more especially his father. His father was working at a steel company. There was a
time when things had to change. As a result of this boy spending most of his time
with his father, everything he wanted or wanted to talk about he would go to his
father.
Things started to change when the steel company where his father worked moved
from Ekandastria to Witbank. Because his father was a bread winner then there
was no way that he could quit his job, so he had to leave his family and move with
the company so that he could continue looking after his family, not knowing that
lots of things will change around his family. I can’t blame him; his wife was there
to carry on taking care of the family and close some gaps on his behalf. But things
became hard for the wife.
Things got worse when the boy started hanging around with friends. They were not
just friends, they were small boys trying to have fun and change their daily routine
because all they did was stay and watch movies at home or write songs. However,
that stopped being fun. This boy and his friends started doing bad things. This
included activities such as smoking and drinking. Since, they always wanted to
experience new things every time, smoking and drinking was not enough for them.
They were up-coming gangsters but that has affected the young boy who no longer
had time for his family. As a result of his behaviour, his family started to suspect
something; and of course, they were right. Eventually his family got the truth.
After the truth was found, things got worse because everyone in the family started
to change on the boy. I was called names; some treated me like an adopted street
kid. All of that was done when my father was at work. That affected me mostly
because I had no one to talk. When my father came back from work he was filled
with all the stories I had done. He was angry and he told me he was out of my life
for good. I had to hustle for money to eat at school and buy myself clothes and
everything.
That happened for some time, until I decided to change along the way because
I was about to finish school. I left crime, drugs and alcohol telling myself I am a
My life is an achiever and a helper :
Thapelo Abie Khalipha
Before I became a community worker in Ekangala community, I was unemployed
for a period of five years. I was in the dark side of life because I was trapped inside
the house without knowing what to do. Luckily came two ladies at my place who
introduced themselves as the community health workers. I think these two angels
were sent by God because when I had a conversation with them, we immediately
got connected and I became interested in the job that they were doing, and that
is when I started. Along the way, I realised that working for the community and
helping people is my passion.
I kept on helping people as home career and realised that my life changed from be-
ing a tsosti (thug) to a helper in the community. The more I saw the differences that
I made in the community the more my life changed. One thing that I have learned
in life is that, if you are a person who takes things for granted in life, you become
a failure. And another thing that I have learned is that people do things that they
are not supposed to do because they are lost and they do not know their passion.
As a helper I have realised that if you are still wounded, then there is nothing you
can do for others or for yourself. So you must sit with your feelings first and stop
judging or criticising yourself or others. You need to be open minded and be active,
then you can continue being good in what you are doing. I have achieved a lot in
life by learning how to handle and deal with different situations.
Today, I thank God for meeting an organisation like the Centre for the Study of
Violence and Reconciliation (CSVR). CSVR allowed me to be part of a group
which is called EAG ((Ekangala Advisory Group). This group has brought change
in our community.
11. 20 21
The incubator : Nthabiseng Sethunya
Bottled in store away
Every beat of the heart is registered to the machine
Timed and monitored every beat at the time
No freedom of expression
No freedom of movement
No freedom of speech
Every right violated
Yet they are not convicted
Every emotion felt and yet can’t be expressed
They kept me here away from the world
Yet again it knows I exist yet they have heard of me
Hopeful, I stay
Faithful, I remain
Trustworthy, I stand
It’s a bottle of temporal storage
That I am kept here for a while
That I am kept for a selfish purpose
That I am kept for a selfless will
That I am kept for a negative restoration
But soon the machines will switch off
This bottle shall break into pieces
The lion will break free and its roar
Will crack the break of dawn
changed person. What I did not know was that worst things were yet to come. I was
doing matric when my uncle asked me to go and stay with him. He had a fight with
his wife and they were on separation. I had no problem with that, but not until he
brought his wife back. I was told to go back home.
But the family refused, not knowing that there was trouble at my uncle’s home. His
wife started locking me outside until we had a fight. I was reported to the police
and I was a wanted during metric final examination and I got arrested.
Time goes on its. In 2011, I found myself with no form of identification, no job,
no school. Later I got a job from Census Project from Stats-South Africa. I didn’t
know anything about community jobs, but after working there, community love
developed. Then after a while, we struggled to start a Youth against Crime Organ-
isation. That was when I was introduced to youth desk under the Department of
Community Support. I worked there, that same year we were visited by two CSVR
community facilitators. These wanted to work hand in hand with us to prevent
violence in our community.
We were so excited to work with them and I found that my happiness was not
wasted. CSVR came into my life and taught me different life skills, handling
different problems and helping people in difficult situations. They gave us training
on psychosocial wellness. This programme transformed my life and changed my
view towards myself and people around me. I learnt how to respond to the triggers
and my life charges.
I am me and I am no longer at the bottom : Simon Gumpe continued
12. 22 23
I did not know, now I know : Patricia Sibanyoni
I didn’t know, now I know
I didn’t know that I was an achiever
Until I found a woman who was sent by God to teach me about my “Personality
Type”
God sent me an angel to open my eyes
To help me heal from my wounded-ness
God I thank you for this wonderful angel
May you keep on blessing them.
I didn’t know, but now, I know
I didn’t know I was attractive, charming, ambitious and energetic
Until God sent me an angel
I didn’t know that I have a problem
Of worker holism and competiveness, but now I know
I didn’t know that I am best in self-accepting, authentic and best role model to
inspire me
But now I know because of the angel that was sent by God
I didn’t know that my core desire is to be admired
And value potential
But with help of an angel now I know
I didn’t know in the conflict I fear being rejected,
But now I know
With the help of the motivator
I didn’t know that my when I am healthy
I am a time conscious, focused and self-accepting, admirable
But now I know thanks to the Angel that God sent me
Love and Pain in Men and Women : Patricia Mahlangu
A woman is a survivor
A woman is a protector
A woman is a pretender
She can be hurt and still smile and say, “It is well with my soul”
And also say, “okusalayo Ubaba we ngani zami”
A man can be abused and
His inner critic will tell him
Don’t report such violence
Man say but “Umama wezingane zami”
Mhlaba awuna mahloni
Mhlaba awuneliseki
Life is not fair, both man and women suffer the same pain and violation
But women are taken seriously, and they chant the slogan
“Wathinta abafazi imbokodwa”
Mhlaba Cabanga nga madoda
Let’s stop calling man names
Let’s create and chant a new slogan that says;
“Wathinta amadoda ubulele izwe lethu”
13. 24 25
The Best of Me : Pennylover “Forever”
My ego evaporates and steams my pride
My happiness dilutes my worries
My joy filters all my sorrows
My laughter eases the pain
My acceptance grows me from my mistakes
This is what makes me to be the best of me
I am that diamond in the rough places
Which friction and polish can make me sparkle?
I am that undiscovered gold
What fire and Lordship can make me pure?
I am that star in the middle of the dark sky that you normally miss
This is what makes me to be the best of me
I am me because of the talents invested in me
I am me because of the elements stored in me
I am me because of the uniqueness produced by me
I am me because of wounded-ness felt by me
I am me because I have learned that I have me
To make me the best of me
Mother love letter : Patricia Sibanyoni “Lady P”
My child “Tinyiko”
You may not know me when you were inside my stomach
but I knew everything about you
I knew you when you started sitting down
And when you started opening your eyes
First time in the world even every teeth in your mouth
I knew about it
I am the one who noticed how many there were
And the first to come out.
For all the days of your development are written in my diary.
I chose a name for you when you were inside my womb
That is why I called you “Gift” because
A child is a gift from God
I am not distant and angry, but I am completely expressing my love
So that you can grow on how to love, and it is my desire to show you
my love my child.
Mother is a provider that meets all your needs
My plans for your future are good plans
I don’t want to see you suffer, all I want is to see you happy like other children
Until you grow up to face the challenges in life
Sometimes rivers of life will flow, sometimes they won’t
Please know that the great encourager is your mom and God
Please make sure in everything that you do
Trust in the Lord because he offers you more than your earthly father can do.
And He is the father who comforts you in all your troubles and heartbroken
He is close to you as I am.
My child I have received the gift when you were born and nothing will
ever separate you from my love
I will always be a mother to you
My question is will you be able to overcome life challenges?
But I trust that you will my lovely kid.
.........................................
Yours sincerely
Your beloved mom
14. 26 27
I Matter : Elizabeth Phala
I see the floods of mishaps
Tears run down my face
Trying to understand the word; “Life”
But I told myself that “I matter”
My life was like seasons of the year
Sunshine in spring depicts life is blossoming
But I find opposite winter with its coma seasons
But I tried still; I carry on because I matter
I push till I reach autumn where I shed emotions
Emotions of hatred, bitterness, anger and shame
Shedding of emotions became a hobby
Because when I look back, I keep on doing the same thing
But still I persist because I matter
In my journey of summer I discovered me
Life was a green symbol of life and energy
It was my reincarnation because I found me
I discovered me because I matter
Watch my space, the energy here is amazing
I am like a star Neptune falling from the galaxy
Star of hope, happiness and living life to the fullest
All because I matter!
Life is a Highway : Xolani Gladwell Khumalo
There was a boy called Xolani
This boy was raised by his grandmother because his mother had left him when he
was three months old.
After eight years that is when he was moved to a place called Ekangala, where
they were living with his aunt and he was at school and it was very tough for him,
because when he was from school he would eat left over’s of food whilst other will
eat fresh food. When he asked they would tell him your mother does not even buy
food for you, she is just a bitch. The boy started to steal money at home and he was
beaten by his aunt.
After he reached 14 years he started to work at the tuck shop called Mamsie tuck
shop so that he could raise money for school trips and eat like others at home.
He was a sports person. When he arrived from training he did not even get food.
When he started to be independent, he had developed and harboured a lot of
anger. As time went by, he dropped out of school and joined other gangsters in the
community. That is where he learnt to become this strong person, and confronted
challenges and situations head on and that is how the personality type eight devel-
oped.
Today I know in life is hard!
To succeed in this life,
You have to be the strongest
As years go by
Sometimes the road is level
Sometimes the hills are high to climb
But self-confidence can make you reach your vision
To combat other challenges you need to be independent
Because life is not a movie, there is no director in life
Life is Highway
15. 28 29
A girl who is lonely : Wendy Sibanyoni
I am a girl who is lonely. I have no one to talk to. Having a family of seven with one
parent and she was the only one who was working. What does that mean; it means
sometimes we have some difficulties, and sometimes we went to bed without food.
That is where as a girl I started to think of other people and forgot about myself and
even forgot about my personal goal or to look after myself. I did not understand
what was good for me and what was not good for me. Now I started of thinking
how, I can get money, what I must do in order to be independent. Besides, I have
seen that my parents are suffering. Having to go work without eating is sad.
Then I started dating bigger guys than me so that I can get some money and buy
food. That is how I ended up falling pregnant at the early age and I had to quit
school. I found myself in an abusive relationship, but I did not see that because I
was getting the money to buy food.
I was not aware that I was surrounded by people who are truly lovely and helpers. I
don’t know how it happened, but I made a decision to connect with those people,
luckily they gave me some advice. That is when I realised that I don’t care much
about me. I was doing stupid things, and I was still young. I had to learn to put my
life first and that no one will do that for me.
One day they took me to some of the community services, they said, “wow” girl
you have done such a good work, keep it up, that is when I realised that I can help
people, and I can work so hard and they were always going with me to some com-
munity events. I joined the organisation called Buffalo Home based Care. I enjoy
the work.
Again came another organisation in my community called CSVR, again I joined.
But I did not understand what was it all about, but with time, I understood, what
the organisation was all about; violence prevention. We had some dialogues with
the community again about violence and prevention, we had team building activi-
ties, we had some workshops and trainings on psychosocial wellness, and the team
was so powerful than before
I like the training because they really helped me a lot, the training was all about
myself and not others, for example, we learnt about the River of Life technique and
I did my own river of life. That is where I took out the painful things in my life, and
put them down on paper. I learnt that holding a painful past experience was not
going to help me. I was wounded; I had amanxeba abhibhidlayo (sceptic wounds).
After all the trainings, that was where I started my life, went to school, looked after
myself, told myself that I love to be me and I appreciated myself.
The Game Nine : Peace and Harmony:
Bongane Shabalala
It was 1985 when he was born, a baby boy that looked like an angel, a handsome
boy. He had both parents and three sisters. They were staying in North Pretoria
near a township called Ekangala.
His father was not working, so he was just trying to get a job or work, his mother
was working.
At the time everything was good. As time went by, the boy started to go to school
in Limpopo, where he had moved to Limpopo with his grandmother. So he moved
with him. He was a peace maker because wherever he was, he made sure that he
did not start or cause conflict.
Because he was a man of people he worked with community. The first time that
he worked with a Non Governmental Organisation (NGO) was in year 2009. He
participated in training provided by “Father Speak Out”. However, back then he
was a bad guy, so because of friends and the love of things of the world. He stopped
all the wrong things that he was doing because; “Peace and Harmony” wanted him
to do what he was born to do.
Father Speak Out taught him how to engage in and with life. He started working
with different NGO`s, like Love Life, Local Drug Action Committee, South Af-
rican Men’s Action Group, National Association of People living With HIV and
AIDS and African National Congress. As a result of his proactiveness and idealistic
mind, everyone had that respect on him.
And later on, he had a family, wife and son life was like good as he still maintained
Peace and Harmony.
16. 30 31
My Story : David Vincent Mahlangu
I am Vincent David Mahlangu. I was born on the 14th March 1987. I was staying
at Hammerskral with my old grandmother. My grandmother passed away on the
22nd June 1997. I couldn’t believe that my grandmother had passed away. I went to
live with my family; my mother, father, two sisters and two brothers.
It is when my life started to change as I was treated like an animal, when a person
doesn’t think you are a human being. My life was not good at all, because I was
hurt by my father, he used to say to me “you are a dog”, “you are stupid” and “you
are not my son”.
I asked myself what I did to my father to deserve that kind of treatment. I prayed
to God to help me. I wanted to do things with my father; I love my father, because
he is my father. But when my mother was not home, I did not eat and my father
did not talk to me. He will beat me up. When I grew up, I started to live my own
life, I became a parent to myself, so I ended up in bad situations I became addicted
to drugs.
The reason I took drugs was because I wanted to change something in my life. My
life was up and down. I also got involved in crime to make money to buy Nyaope
drug. Over the years, I turned to Marijuana and Nyaope under false belief that it
would allow me to escape my problems. But, it just made things worse. I kept saying
to myself I am going to stop permanently, and I smiled again when I left the world
of drugs.
Difficult as it may be to face ones problems, the consequences of drug use are al-
ways worse that the problem one is trying to solve by smoking or taking them. The
real answer is to get the facts, knowledge and not to take drugs in the first place.
I continuously thought about the danger and damage that a person can cause after
taking drugs. Sometimes, drugs blur the memory, causing blank spots when I try
to get information through this cloudy mess. I told myself that I will not do drugs
again. Drugs were making me slow, stupid and caused me to fail in life. I met Xola-
ni Gladwell Khumalo who told me about NGO`s and youth desk. I went to the
police station with Xolani where they welcomed well and I was happy. I joined the
youth desk, and then I met Sibongiseni Gumpe and Busi who supported me.
After that I met Sikhathele Nkala, Tsholofelo Sesanga from the Centre for the
Study of Violence and Reconciliation and formed the Ekangala advisory group
with others from the community I started a new life with new people in my life.
I started being recognised in the community and people were happy
for me. I became stronger and more powerful.
My Life as a Helper in the Community :
Case Study: Elizabeth Phala
I met this lady in June 2014 and her name is Mary Batlong (not her real name)
She resides in Section 173 in Ekangala.
She is married to Mr Mahlangu (not his real name) under the customary marriage
and is still using her maiden surname.
Mary had a crisis in adopting a step grand-daughter.
This story goes back to 2013 when the daughter of Mr Mahlangu came and gave
them the custody of their child, without proper custody of the court; she was four
years old and in a spur of the moment, Mr Mahlangu passed on. To our amazement
the lady was married to someone and was using his surname and the child used
another surname other than the maternal mother. It was a serious issue and the
grandfather also passed on later in November 2013.
Her problems became more as she was not getting help because she did not have
powers as her surname is different and the husband was threatening her. In March
after consulting with me I referred her to a Social Worker in Ekangala. The social
worker looked at the best interest of the child since the child was close to Mary.
Sadly, the new home and the step father was not good for the child. They arranged
with the court and got the custody. As we thought, it was over; she applied for fos-
ter grant because she is unemployed and had no income. This was dragging on and
on the other side; she could not pay the school fees for Pre School. In June 2014, I
saw her and she explained everything to me.
Then I called a Community Development Worker in our ward, I explained ev-
erything to her. Afterwards, she intervened by arranging for food parcels and she
called in a social worker to help her. That is how she started getting food parcels in
the middle of August 2014. She is happy now and living with her granddaughter
and now everything is in good conditions.
17. 32 33
The Inner Critic : Mpho Chavura
“I call it the joy villain
The twister of good facts
That you think about yourself
The bad things that you think about
Without you noticing
If you’ve never heard about it
it binds you to your negativity response to yourself”
Community Awaken : Tsamme Mfundisi
Give me back my yesterday, I am today,
Standing still in the dusty areas of Mzansi
Wakeup – Wakeup.
I am priceless; I might not look pretty,
But I give life to the lifeless,
Looking at you from afar feels like I’m miles away from you
Wakeup – Wakeup.
Mothers, Fathers, Children together we celebrate your breath,
The spirit of living and walking in the noisy street,
I enjoy the delight of Ubuntu, Laughter and Love
Wakeup – Wakeup.
Sorrow and Tears may come but they don’t stay forever,
Service Delivery Protests, Violence, Killings are part of the daily living,
But I don’t get discouraged by these events
Wakeup – Wakeup.
The outcome of having life and joy, celebrations and ululations is the
order of our days,
I have drunk all your passion, devotion and Living unity,
Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking
Wakeup – Wakeup.
You who has produced lots of doctors, nurses, community practitioners
and lots more,
Making a Difference: Engage - Inspire – Empower!
Community Awaken…!
18. 34 35
Conclusion
The group that left at the end of the four-phase psychosocial wellness training was a
different group from the one we met during phase one of the programme. During
the course of the programme, they were truly transformed. This is reflected by one
of the member’s comments: “I have been a learner all along; now I am able to teach
others, help them discover their true essence and find their freedom too.”
The facilitators observed a few things about the group, which contributed to this
remarkable transformation:
• A very real sense of trust and understanding developed among the participants
— this allowed the whole group to go “deep” in their sharing. Each and every
participant was fully engaged and contributed openly about themselves and
their learning.
• Participants gave each other direct feedback and shared their opinions and
advice with each other. This happened very organically, and was very exciting.
• During the check-ins on some days, participants shared how they were seeing
real and tangible shifts in their lives, especially in their relationships with each
other, and in how they were engaging with the community.
• Participants really “got” the concepts that were introduced through the pro-
gramme – they seemed to internalise them to such an extent that it felt as
though they themselves had introduced them (rather than the facilitators!).
It often felt as though they were leading facilitators to the next activity.
CSVR believes that the spaces we create for self discovery contribute directly to
better understanding of ourselves and others – and thereby contribute to the
individual and collective healing necessary for our country. CSVR aims to
continue to work with communities to encourage this healing and to combat
violence and conflict. We invite others to join us so that we may work together to
“build societies that are peaceful, equal and free of violence.”
In Ekangala, an action group comprising of fifteen young people was
set up in 2012 to lead implementation of activities aimed at dealing with
violence in this community.
This action group consists of eight males and seven females all drawn from local
organisations. The action group works in collaboration with local stakeholders;
community, traditional and religious leaders and service providers in addressing
violence and providing psychosocial support to victims of violence. Also, the Ac-
tion Group regularly attends meetings organised by other Community Based Or-
ganizations to share knowledge and lessons drawn from their direct violence pre-
vention interventions. This has ensured the establishment of strong and strategic
alliances with potential community allies which has in turn built great momentum
for change in Ekangala. In addition, the Group works in schools where they pro-
vide training and dialogue with learners on causes of different forms of violence
common in schools; (cyber violence and bullying, sexual harassment etc) and the
impact of violence on learners.
Work done by Ekangala Community Action Group
