Despite their uncharitable personality traits, psychopaths can also present as charming and irresistible. Study participants who had dated psychopaths reported emotional, biological, behavioral, cognitive, and interpersonal effects. In spite of the negative consequences, there were also indications that participants experienced post-traumatic growth.

2. Verified by Psychology Today
Vinita Mehta Ph.D., Ed.M.
Head Games
PSYCHOPATHY
When Your Romantic Partner Is a Psychopath: 5
Core Themes
New research explores the consequences of being involved with a psychopath.
Posted December 13, 2022 | Reviewed by Michelle Quirk
KEY POINTS
Despite their uncharitable personality traits, psychopaths can also present as charming and irresistible.
Study participants who had dated psychopaths reported emotional, biological, behavioral, cognitive, and
interpersonal effects.
In spite of the negative consequences, there were also indications that participants experienced posttraumatic
growth.
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3. Why is the seduction of the psychopath so powerful? Because it is the art of the con wrapped in the beautiful
illusion of love. ―Unknown
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These words of wisdom, imparted by an anonymous source, capture the often spellbinding nature of psychopaths. They
are characteristically grandiose, deceitful, impulsive, without a conscience and remorse, and frequently engage in criminal
activity. Yet, despite these uncharitable personality traits, they can also present as charming and irresistible. Until they
show their true colors, that is. While it is estimated that psychopaths comprise a mere 1 percent of the general population,
the devastation they leave in their wake can be enormous.
What are the physical and mental health consequences of being intimately involved with a psychopath? This was one
focus of a study led by psychologist Adelle Forth of Carleton University in Canada. To pursue this inquiry, she and her

4. For a while after the relationship, I was angry at having been deceived on such a deep level.
I hit rock bottom in my life. It was the most painful experience I have ever endured. I for the first time thought of
suicide as life was too painful to deal with.
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research team recruited 457 participants (10.5 percent male and 89.5 percent female) who had romantic involvement with
a psychopath before or during taking part in the study (nearly 80 percent of participants were no longer involved).
Relationship length ranged from several months to more than 20 years, with most being between two and five years.
The participants were interviewed about their experiences and completed various psychological questionnaires, including
those that assess for posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and depression.
What did Dr. Forth and her colleagues find? The analyses for this study focus revealed five core themes, which
demonstrated the deep and lasting impact of being in a toxic relationship with a psychopath. The results are summarized
below.
1. Emotional Consequences
The theme of emotional consequences proved most prevalent. Participants reported feelings along the spectrum of anger
(including irritability and frustration) and hatred (of self and misogyny). One survivor expressed the following:
Anxiety, fear, panic, and paranoia were oft-cited feelings, as were depressive symptoms, including anhedonia, and suicidal
ideation and attempts. A participant shared this:

5. I had a substantial amount of weight loss. I would gag when I would try to eat. Initially my hair did not grow. My
hair fell out and is coming in gray. My nails would not grow. I would be completely dehydrated. I developed a
bleeding ulcer. I would not eat sometimes for days.
I now believe that my arthritis, colon issues, etc. are directly related to the stresses of living for 14 years with a
psychopath. The amount of personal energies required to handle getting through day to day life with him
2. Biological Consequences
Survivors experienced a range of somatic complaints, including gastrointestinal problems, ulcers, and headaches.
Consider the repercussions as described by a participant:
Interviewees also referenced heart and respiratory problems (e.g., angina, asthma, bronchitis), a range of endocrine and
urologic diseases (e.g., diabetes, hypothyroidism), and autoimmune diseases (e.g., rheumatoid arthritis). One victim said:

6. seemed to have sucked health from me personally.
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Some victims referred to physical injuries, like broken ribs and black eyes.
3. Behavioral Changes
Changes to sleeping and eating (e.g., insomnia), lack of self-care (e.g., substance abuse, smoking), and changes in social
activities and/or interactions were reported. Many survivors said they had engaged in social activities much less. One
participant reflected:

7. I was dealing with nearly constant depression for a long time after I left this woman. I would not venture out in
public for too long, instead preferring to stay indoors and alone. I do not socialize anywhere as much as I once
used to.
I was unable to concentrate and nearly lost my job because my boss noticed I was forgetting things and making
mistakes.
I feel empty and lonely, all the time. Like I’ve lost everything good in my life because I’m an idiot and fell in love
with a psychopath. I have little hope for being able to find someone, or anyone who will ever understand me or
want to date me.
4. Cognitive Changes
Consistent with PTSD symptoms, survivors referenced intrusion (i.e., flashbacks), dissociation (i.e., rumination),
concentration difficulties (i.e., loss of focus), and memory difficulties. A participant remarked:
5. Interpersonal Consequences
Having an intimate relationship with a psychopath damaged victims’ interpersonal functioning more broadly. Many lost
trust in others, as they questioned others’ motives, withheld personal information, and feared being betrayed or
abandoned. Participants also had difficulty trusting their social judgment because they had a relationship with a
psychopath. Relatedly, they also referenced feelings of loss and loneliness. One participant shared:
The authors conclude their study by noting that despite the negative consequences of dating a psychopath, there were

8. References
Forth, A., Sezlik, S., Lee, S., Ritchie, M., Logan, J., & Ellingwood, H. (2022). Toxic relationships: The experiences and effects of psychopathy in
romantic relationships. International journal of offender therapy and comparative criminology, 66(15), 1627-1658.
About the Author
Vinita Mehta, Ph.D., Ed.M., is a clinical psychologist and journalist. She was formerly the Development
Producer and Science Editor of PBS's This Emotional Life.
Online: Dr. Vinita Mehta, LinkedIn, Twitter
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also indications that participants experienced posttraumatic growth. They reported instances of resilience and becoming a
stronger person, which may be a useful area of study for the future.