Coping strategies of mothers having children with special needs
Unheard Voices of Foster Carers' Children
1. Cardiff Metropolitan University
Prifysgol Fetropolitan Caerdydd
B.Sc. (Hons) Psychology
Final Year Project
Unheard Voices: The Views and Experiences of Foster Carer’s
Own Children
Phillip Thomas Smith
2013
Dissertation submitted in partial fulfilment of the
requirements of Cardiff Metropolitan University for the
degree of Bachelor of Science
2. DECLARATION
I hereby declare that this dissertation is the result of my own independent
investigation under the supervision of my tutor. The various sources to which I
am indebted are clearly indicated. This dissertation has not been accepted in
substance for any other degree, and is not being submitted concurrently for
any other degree.
.................................................................... Phillip Thomas Smith, Candidate
3. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I would first and foremost like to thank my supervisor Dr Dan Heggs, whose
help and guidance throughout my final year has made this project a rewarding
undertaking.
An especially big thanks to my friends, whose advice and continuous proof
reading gave me the confidence to keep writing when I felt I couldn’t do so
any longer.
A special thanks to my mother, who as a foster carer gave valuable insight
into the formulation of this project.
Finally I would like to thank those who participated in this project for sharing
with me their personal experiences, without which this project would not have
been possible.
4. 1
ABSTRACT
Background
In the UK it has been reported that as many as 87,000 children and young
people were cared for by the Local Authorities on any given day (Sutton and
Stack, 2012). With an increasing demand to ensure that foster care is
provided for those who need it most, there is an even greater demand for
research to further understand the unique context of the fostering experience.
The work of Younes and Harp (2007) highlight that the voices of the foster
carer’s own children are often unheard despite the valid contribution they give
to the fostering experience. This finding is surprising; as a reason commonly
cited for quitting foster care is the affect it may have on the foster carer’s own
children (Farmer et al., 2004; Twigg and Swan, 2007).
Aim
The aim of this study is to explore the views and experiences of foster carer’s
own children, in relation to how they cope with and manage the challenges
throughout the fostering experience.
Method
A qualitative design of semi-structured interviews was used to obtain data.
Interviews were conducted with six individuals whose parents had fostered for
a period of at least one year during which they were living at home. Data was
analysed using Thematic Analysis.
Results
Four themes were uncovered from the data: ‘Family Dynamics: Age,
Agreement and Management’, ‘Positive Experiences vs. Negative
Experiences’, ‘Empathy’ and ‘Placement Endings’.
Conclusion
The dynamics of the fostering household was found to be the strongest
influence in terms of how the children of foster carers approach and manage
the fostering experience. They recognised the potential conflict between both
5. 2
positive and negative issues when living with foster children; however they
displayed a strong empathetic frame of mind towards their foster siblings,
own siblings and parents. Placement endings were found to be the most
difficult period within the fostering experience during which foster carer’s
children experienced emotions such as sadness and guilt. Future research
should explore these issues further in relation to their effect on the children of
foster carers.
8. 5
Chapter 1: Introduction
1.1 Overview
In 2000 it was reported that approximately 33,000 ‘looked after’ children were
living in foster homes (Wilson et al., 2000) throughout the UK. However, it has
recently been reported that as many as 87,000 children and adolescents are
cared for by the Local Authorities on any given day (Sutton and Stack, 2012).
Children and young people enter the care system for a variety of reasons
including family breakdowns, neglect, or serious abuse; it is the duty of the
foster carer to build secure relationships with vulnerable children through an
ever-changing system. With these statistics having doubled over the last
decade, it is increasingly imperative that fostering continues to be a priority in
psychological research.
The Department of Education’s Green Paper (Department of Education, 2003)
‘Every Child Matters’ summarises the importance of a family upbringing for
every child; a safe and nurturing environment where they are attached
securely to their caregivers. It is the failure of this stable environment which
often leads children to enter the foster care system. It is widely assumed that
foster families are the best form of care as they provide an ‘integral
contribution to a child’s health growth and development’ (Twigg and Swan,
2007, p. 49). Foster children benefit greatly from this arrangement and the
structure of ‘everyday life’ provides an element of normality absent from other
forms of care (Anderson, 1999; Sinclair et al., 2001; Höjer, 2007).
With an increasing demand to ensure that foster care is provided for those
who need it most, there is an even greater need for research to further
understand the unique context of the fostering experience, particularly from
the point of view of the children involved. Berrick et al., (2000) argues that
children are:
“…the primary clients for the welfare system, yet their voices are muffled by
an array of difficult impediments…” (p.127).
Despite their importance, the children’s views and thoughts are often unheard
despite their centrality to the system. However Younes and Harp (2007)
9. 6
strongly argue that the voices of the foster carer’s own children are often
unheard, despite their direct involvement and valid contribution they bring to
the fostering experience.
1.2 Focus of Previous Research
Contemporary research focuses mainly on the experiences of the foster
parents (Staines et al., 2011) and foster children (Selwyn et al., 2010), with
little attention paid to the needs and experiences of the foster carer’s own
children. However, a link has been established between the presence of foster
carer’s own children and the failure of fostering placements in previous
research (Farmer et al., 2004; Sutton and Stack, 2012). Despite the
significance of these findings, the children of foster carer’s still remain largely
‘invisible’ and research has paid little attention to the way in which they
respond to and manage the fostering experience (Younes and Harp, 2007).
Additionally, little research has focused on the role they play in terms of
placement success or demise (Walsh and Campbell, 2009).
This is surprising, as one of the reasons commonly cited as a foster carer’s
decision to resign is the effect it may have on their own children (Twigg, 1994;
Triseliotis et al., 2002; Farmer et al., 2004; Twigg and Swan, 2007). A study of
foster parents who had quit or were choosing to quit indicated that 36% chose
to do so due to the problematic behaviour of the fostered children (Rhodes et
al., 2001); this was attributed to inadequate training which did not prepare
parents for the effect that fostering would have on their own children.
Although a small number of studies have previously addressed these issues
in (Parker, 1966; George 1970; Fanshell and Shinn, 1978), they are largely
outdated. Consequently they are not reliable enough to support current
research, as the dynamics of the fostering experience have developed
considerably over the passing decades. More recent research as summarised
by Sutton and Stack (2012) has identified a number of potential ‘stressors’
which foster carer’s own children may encounter, however they are largely
sources of prospective stress with little attention paid to how they manage
them.
10. 7
1.3 Transition to Fostering
Literature in this area identifies the ‘settling in’ period, when the foster children
first arrive at the family home, as a challenging experience for foster carer’s
children. They may become particularly stressed as they compete with the
fostered children for their parent’s attention and as a result they can feel
overlooked (Twigg, 1994).
Younes and Harp (2007) suggest the presence of foster children influences a
process of readjustment, whereby a relationship change occurs between the
foster parents and their children. This can often result in feelings of anger,
resentment and jealousy as the foster carer’s children renegotiate their role
within their household. One possible explanation for these negative emotions
is ‘separation anxiety’ as the foster carer’s children compete for their parent’s
attention (Kaplan, 1988) however this hypothesis has not been explored
further. Younes and Harp also argue that while the foster carer’s children may
initially experience negative emotions, they eventually become used to their
‘new siblings’.
These negative emotions are attributed largely to time and energy of the
foster parents being devoted to the needs of the foster children (Höjer, 2004);
which can often lead to feelings of guilt by the foster carer’s children as they
may feel pressured to accept their new siblings (Höjer, 2007). Sutton and
Stack (2012) cite, based on the work of Capara and Steca (2005), that
children of foster carer’s are able to overcome the potential difficulties of the
transition period by having a positive frame of mind, and this eased the
process of integrating the fostered children into their homes.
1.4 Loss of Parental Attention
Loss of parental attention does not appear to be exclusive to the transition
period, some children of foster carers regard this issue as continuous
disruption, and while they felt it was necessary for their parents to meet the
needs of the fostered children they reported feelings of jealousy and
resentment (Watson and Jones, 2002).
11. 8
This is something which they felt they could not always share with their
parents and they express feelings of shame and guilt for being unhappy
(Twigg, 1993; Swan, 2000; Nuske, 2006). They justify this by recognising the
meaning of their parents work and feel that they understood the importance of
the fostering task Swan (2000).
While children of foster carers may regard loss of parental attention as
‘disruption’, a more significant finding suggests that they mature quickly as a
result of exposure to the fostering context (Department of Health, 1995; Pugh,
1996; Nuske, 2004; Twigg and Swan, 2007). It can be argued that this is a
response to having foster children living in their home, and as a result they
develop a level of maturity sufficient enough to assume a caring role for their
younger foster sibling.
According to Twigg and Swan (2007), quicker maturation can be attributed to
their loss of parental attention, and so they develop quickly in order to become
more independent and look after themselves. Through this observation, early
maturation may not be an exclusive negative issue, as some children of foster
carers felt that this contributed to their identity and helped them to find ‘who
they were’ (Twigg and Swan, 2007).
Despite the aforementioned arguments, it is unclear whether it is the result of
adaptive or maladaptive functioning as proposed by Pugh (1996) who
attributes this increased maturity to a ‘loss of innocence’. This raises the
question of whether the benefits of quicker maturity are outweighed by the
issues which influence it in the first place.
1.5 Age and Gender
A small body of research indicates that age plays an important role in terms of
how the foster carer’s children approach and manage the fostering
experience; however this factor has not been adequately explored in previous
literature. Pugh (1996) found that younger children aged between seven and
thirteen experience the most difficulty in adjusting to the fostering experience.
Additionally, Berridge and Cleaver (1987) argue that the age of foster carer’s
own children and the fostered children is linked to placement stability. While
12. 9
they did not present evidence for an appropriate age outline, they recommend
that an age gap of a few years can help to make placements more successful.
Kelly (2000) suggests that the closer the fostered children and foster carer’s
children are in age, the more likely conflict will occur between them. Sutton
and Stack (2012) attribute this conflict to the vulnerability of the foster carer’s
children, and suggest that an appropriate age gap may act as a protective
barrier through which the children of foster carers can maintain their own
personal space. In terms of age and maturity, the protective age gap may also
provide relief for the foster carer’s children (Höjer and Nordenfors, 2004).
Sutton and Stack (2012) found that the age of the foster carer’s children in
relation to the age of the fostered children may be a crucial component of their
own identity. They argue that the children of foster carers being the oldest
child of the family means that they were the most able child in the family; this
in turn contributes to their perception of themselves as caregivers as opposed
to being on ‘equal level’ with the fostered children. Additionally they explain
that this gives the children of foster carer’s a sense of purpose where they
play an active role in terms of improving the lives of the fostered children. It
can be argued therefore, that being older than the fostered children gives the
children of foster carers a stronger sense of purpose, in turn this aids their
willingness to be part of a progressive and sustainable ‘fostering team’.
Only one study addresses gender as a potential factor; Twigg (1993) found
that a placement which involved an adolescent being placed with an
adolescent of a foster carer, but were opposite in gender, were more likely to
produce complications. Conversely, younger children responded more
positively to children of the opposite sex (Twigg, 1993); this may be due to
fewer strong differences between younger children, however this is yet to be
explored further.
1.6 Aggression and Conflict
The children of foster carers are sometimes at risk of being the recipient of
aggressive behaviour from the fostered children (Watson and Jones, 2002).
These acts may include physical or verbal threats, manipulative behaviour,
13. 10
destruction or theft of valuable possessions, or actual physical acts of
aggression.
Children of foster carer’s express concern for their own safety, however they
express greater concern for the safety of their relatives, in particular their
mothers (Swan, 2000; Watson and Jones, 2002; Nuske, 2006; Sutton and
Stack, 2012). Throughout the aforementioned research, they expressed
feelings of anger toward the treatment of their parents aggressive or violent
children were in their care. Where the children of foster carers were older and
mature, they described instances of having to intervene in order to defuse
aggressive situations (Watson and Jones, 2002; Nuske, 2006).
While foster families are at risk of receiving acts of violence against them,
actual instances are arguably in the minority (Twigg and Swan, 2007). In spite
of this, it has been reported that instances of aggression are sometimes
overlooked by the foster care system (Watson and Jones, 2002).
1.7 The Benefits of Fostering
Despite the many challenges encountered through fostering, the children of
foster carers often look to highlight more positive aspects of their experiences
(Twigg and Swan, 2007; Sutton and Stack, 2012).
Children of foster carers often report being influenced positively by the
fostering experience; they comment feeling more responsible, sensitive and
mature people (Swan, 2000; Nuske, 2004). The participants in the work of
Swan (2000) felt the experience of fostering was something which they
benefited from:
“Fostering made me who I am today … and I like who I am; fostering made
me responsible; fostering made me flexible (Swan, 2000, p.13).
Swan argues the benefits of fostering can sometimes outweigh the negatives,
as the children of foster carer’s often comment on being positively influenced
by the fostering experience and express a greater awareness of social issues.
Additionally they felt able to empathise with the unfortunate circumstances the
14. 11
foster children had arrived from, and they expressed satisfaction through
watching them grow and develop (Swan, 2000; Sutton and Stack, 2012).
The above findings are supported by Pugh (1996) and Höjer (2007), who
assert that the children of foster carers can benefit from the experience of
fostering as it presents an opportunity to develop their ‘emotional literacy
skills’. These skills are essential for emotional regulation and interpersonal
relationships, and the more developed they are, the more cable they will be to
cope with emotionally demanding issues (Joseph and Strain, 2003).
Additionally Humphrey et al,. (2007) explains that emotional literacy is
essential for well-being in adulthood and reduces the likelihood of developing
ill mental health. They reflect altruistic qualities and lower ego-centrism, and
allow individuals to understand the perspective of others (Bandura, 1986;
1997). The children of foster carers have been found to display these
qualities; they may offer explanations for their foster sibling’s unwanted
behaviour, and show awareness of the deeper issues which underpin them
(Pugh, 1996; Höjer, 2007; Sutton and Stack, 2012).
It is important to recognise however, that while the children of foster carers
are able to report many benefits, the negative issues may still have a negative
impact upon them. Twigg (1994) questions the extent to which the positive
aspects are overstated, and argues that the children of foster carers may be
inclined to present a socially acceptable point of view. This may be influenced
by the belief that they should not be critical of their parent’s choices, as Swan
(2000) argues that foster carers children seek to protect their parent’s integrity
despite holding ambivalent feelings.
1.8 Placement Endings
The end of a placement, the period during which foster children leave the
household to return home, or onto another placement, causes the most
emotional distress to the foster family (Poland and Groze, 1993; Pugh, 1996;
Norrington, 2002; Twigg and Swan, 2007; Younes and Harp, 2007; Sutton
and Stack, 2012). Placement endings can cause a stir of emotions for the
children of foster carers, including anxiety, loss and guilt (Younes and Harp,
15. 12
2007), and the children of foster carers may experience emotional harm as a
result (Pugh, 1996; Twigg and Swan, 2007; Sutton and Stack, 2012).
Placement endings characterise the contradictory situation that foster families
are faced with; where they are expected to include foster children into their
family and nurture them with the knowledge that they will eventually leave
(Twigg and Swan, 2007). This is summarised further through the work of
Nuske (2006), whose participant commented:
“You have to put your whole heart and soul into these kids and try to make
them feel comfortable and make them feel at home and everything like that
and at the same time you have to keep a fair distance away to save yourself”
(Nuske, 2006, p. 236).
It can be argued that the children of foster carers, as well as the foster family
itself, need time to grieve once the foster child has left their home. Despite the
need for this, there are few considerations for how to support the children of
foster carers at this time. Fostering services recognise the sensitivity
surrounding the ending of a placement and recognise loss that the children
experience, the demand for foster placements often prevents the opportunity
for a grieving period (Watson and Jones, 2002; Twigg and Swan, 2007).
Placement endings may provide an opportunity for foster families to ‘regroup’
and address their own needs (Sutton and Stack, 2012), however this may only
act as a short-term avoidance strategy through which grief is avoided, rather
than addressed. Littleton et al., (2007) argues that this approach may resolve
short term distress; however it is maladaptive if relied upon. Additionally,
unresolved grief has been linked to increased psychopathy in adulthood
(Edmans and Marcellino-Boisvert, 2002), this further evidences the
importance of emotional support for the children of foster carers during this
period.
1.9 Rationale for Present Study
Previous literature acknowledges the difficulties that the children of foster
carers may experience; however little research pays attention to how they
manage these experiences (Walsh and Campbell, 2009; Sutton and Stack,
16. 13
2012). It is essential to further understand the role they play within the
fostering setting, as prospective foster parents may wish to consider the
variety of potential challenges and issues faced by their own children when
foster children are brought into their home (Younes & Harp, 2007).
Therefore the aim of this study is to explore the views and experiences of
foster carer’s own children in relation to how they approach the fostering
experience and manage the potential challenges faced by them. A qualitative
method will be employed in order to obtain the salient meanings of how the
children of foster carers view make sense of their experiences.
17. 14
Chapter 2: Methodology
2.1 Design
A qualitative study employing semi-structured interviews to obtain data.
2.2 Sample
A purposive sampling technique was used to select six individuals, their
parents had fostered for a period of at least one year during which they were
living at home. Participants were recruited on the basis of meeting this
inclusion criterion. Participants were required to be of at least 19 years of age
and their current residence was not the home in which their parents were
currently fostering. This was necessary to encourage a retrospective
approach to the subject matter, and to ensure that interviews were distanced
from any current foster children in the care of their parents. This was
necessary to avoid the emotional involvement of any foster children. Six
individuals agreed to be interviewed (Gender: M= 2 F= 4), who were recruited
through acquaintances of the researcher. This was primarily done by word of
mouth.
2.3 Materials
The apparatus for this study included one Interview Schedule, Information
Sheet, Consent Form and Recording Device.
2.4 Development of Interview Schedule
The interview schedule was designed according to the key issues specified in
the relevant academic literature. Topics were identified then arranged flexibly
to accommodate each participant’s interpretation of events.
Initial questions were focused on being general and unthreatening, allowing
rapport to build between the interviewer and participant (e.g. When did the
fostering first begin?). Gradually the questions became more specific (e.g.
What kind of relationship did you have with the foster children?). Questions
toward the end were focused on concluding the discussion (e.g. What is your
overall view of fostering?) in order for the participants to reflect on their prior
18. 15
comments. Most questions asked were open ended to allow participants to
determine their own responses (Fereday, 2006); however some questions
were intended to be specific in order to probe specific issues (e.g. Do you feel
you had a particular role?)
2.5 Pilot
A pilot interview was conducted with a participant who met the inclusion
criterion who was already an acquaintance of the researcher. The purpose of
the pilot interview was to ensure that questions asked were suitable, prompted
acceptable responses, and was structured adequately according to the aim of
the research. The majority of questions produced satisfying responses;
however it was necessary to readjust the wording of some and for the
chronology of the interview to be altered.
2.6 Ethical Considerations
The method of this study was examined by the ethics committee of the
university to establish practically and to identify any discrepancies. Data
collection began once ethical approval was obtained and all participants were
informed before data collection of their right to withdraw at any stage without
penalty.
2.7 Procedure
Recruiting was deployed opportunistically; correspondence between the
researcher and participants took place via email. An information sheet was
provided to each participant through first contact which explained the purpose
of the study. Consent was obtained once participant confirmed their
willingness to take part, date and location of the interview was arranged
through second correspondence once each participant agreed to take part.
Participants were contacted prior to interview to confirm their decision to take
part. Before each interview commenced, participants were reminded of the
focus of the interview according to the information sheet provided, and their
right to withdraw at any time without penalty.
19. 16
Once participants were satisfied with all information, interviews commenced.
During each interview, the researcher ensured participants were relaxed,
remained focused on them and listened attentively. The researcher prompted
participants where necessary to maintain the flow of the interview, and to
allow the participant to manage their thoughts. Once the interviews were
completed, participants were thanked for their time. Each interview lasted
between twenty and thirty five minutes.
Each interview was then transcribed in order to conduct the analysis.
2.8 Method of Analysis
Thematic Analysis was used to analyse the data, which was conducted in
accordance with the stages recommended by Braun & Clarke (2006).
Stage one involved familiarisation with the data; each interview was read and
re-read individually to insure immersion with the data. Initial ideas or
meanings within the data were noted.
Stage two focused on formation of initial codes, this involved coding any
interesting aspects of the data across the whole data set and to consolidate all
data which were linked to each code. Any patterns within the data were
highlighted and annotated.
Stage three involved formation of themes within the data. This was done by
grouping and arranging codes which were relevant to each respective theme.
Potential themes were eliminated or consolidated to form one theme. The
primary focus of this theme was to consider the relationship between the
codes and themes to ensure a logical reflection of the meaning.
Stage four concerned evaluating each theme, this stage involved two phases;
the first involved reading each extracts relevant to each theme and ensuring a
logical pattern emerged. The second phase involved ensuring that the theme
communicated an accurate representation of the whole data set.
The final themes were named and defined according to the overall narrative of
the six data sets; the names produced for each theme were intended to
capture the meaning within them.
20. 17
Chapter 3: Results
From the analysed data four themes emerged. These themes provide insight
into the similarities and differences between how the participants approach
and manage the experience of fostering, which are displayed in the table
below:
3.1 Table of Themes
Household Dynamics: Age,
Acceptance and Management
Age as key influence in approaching
relationship with fostered children:
75 – 77 “…We all pretty much got on
really well…” (Leona)
250 – 251 “…My brother really got on with
him cause they were similar in age…”
(Matthew)
282 – 285 “...I’m old enough and mature
enough and I think…” (Andy)
230 – 231 “…I don’t think I would have
liked to have been younger…” (Leona)
155 – 157 “…Cause I was like the only
girl, and the eldest of the youngest, I was
like- I wanted to look after them…”
(Samantha)
274 – 276 “…I had that distance, I was
five, six, seven years older…” (Matthew)
203 – 204 “…I just felt like one of them…”
(Leona)
21. 18
Reason for acceptance of fostering as a
factor in how the experience is
approached:
Management of experience as coping
strategy:
178 – 180 “…Because I was similar in
age to them, they felt they could confide
in me…” (Leona)
152 – 153 “…We kind of understood that
that’s what she had to do…” (Sarah)
44 – 46 “…When we we’re younger we
always babysat for other people’s
children…” (Sian)
20 – 21 “…I didn’t know any different…”
(Leona)
23 – 24 “…that’s how it’s always been so
I wouldn’t know any different…”
(Samantha)
576 – 577 "…It was her earning a living
and I was benefiting from it…” (Sarah)
83 – 84 “…I wouldn’t know any different,
they’ve had their surnames changed and
stuff…” (Samantha)
10 – 12 “…we were all quite aware that
she wanted to do it…” (Andy)
100 – 102 “…I had a boyfriend at the
time…”
(Sarah)
196 – 201 “…wanted to do my own thing
22. 19
sort of person…” (Matthew)
376 – 377 “…There wasn’t any support.
In that- like I only got it as a favour…”
(Leona)
Negative Experiences vs. Positive
Experiences
Negatives experiences: Issues found to
be challenging.
Positive experiences: The benefits of
fostering.
344 – 346 “…’it’s just THINGS, it doesn’t
matter…” (Sarah)
145 – 147 “…a lot of my things were
stolen…” (Matthew)
305 – 307 “… she’s always said like ‘No
one’s going to intimidate me, no one’s
going to threaten me’…” (Sarah)
246 – 248 “…And sometimes they could
(.) get violet towards my mother…”
(Leona)
460 – 461 “…I was confused I didn’t want
him to hurt my mum obviously…”
(Samantha)
318 – 320 “…I needed peace and quiet to
get on with things. THAT caused a lot of
arguments…” (Matthew)
316 – 317 “…improvement in every
person that we’ve had is like – VAST…”
(Sarah)
23. 20
286 – 292 “…You just see how different
they are…” (Laura)
478 – 480 “…she was completely
changed and …she was so involved and
she just loves it…” (Andy)
392 – 394 “…you’re exposed to more
about, you know, society in general…”
(Matthew)
509 – 512 “…I'm so proud of my younger
brothers 'cause they could have turned
out a lot worse…” (Samantha)
Empathy: The Foster Parents and
Foster Children
Empathy towards the foster children:
Empathy towards relatives:
51 – 54 “… I think she was- initially she
had that sort of element of, I wouldn’t say
jealousy but sort of, uhh slight
undertone…” (Andy)
200 – 205 “…this is obviously going to
make her adoption a lot more
traumatic…” (Andy)
728 – 732 “…cause I think if I was
fostered I’d find it really really difficult I
think…” (Sarah)
212– 214 “…be more understanding…”
(Samantha)
341 – 343 “…what I really noticed with all
24. 21
the foster kids was just the time they
needed…” (Matthew)
201 - 206 "...they’ve decided to hold her
adoption…” (Andy)
116 – 118 “…it’s just quite, daunting
thinking about what would have
happened…” (Andy)
374 – 377 “…I think it hit her more than it
hit us…” (Sian)
748 – 751 “…Just when it upsets my
mum it makes me really angry…” (Sarah)
157 – 159 “…but that’s the bit I hate
about it all…” (Laura)
25. 22
Placement Endings
A mixture of emotions as a consequence
of the foster children leaving the foster
home.
611 – 614 “…then suddenly they were
like it will be in a month’s time…” (Sarah)
57 – 61 “…you know it’s going to
happen…” (Sian)
546 – 511 “…I think knowing where they
are going makes it easier…” (Sian)
136 – 141 “…but then you know that bond
is sort of gonna go…” (Andy)
258 – 261 “…I didn’t want them to go
back their mum obviously ‘cause I made a
great connection…” (Samantha)
317 – 324 “…I dunno, eventually you just-
become, you just get used to it I
suppose…” (Samantha)
57 – 59 “…I used to get really upset when
they left…” (Laura)
214 – 218 “…I used to get attached to the
kids and then they’d be going…” (Leona)
26. 23
3.2 Household Dynamics: Age, Acceptance and Management
From the data, it emerged the dynamics of each participant’s family strongly
influenced how they viewed and approached the idea of fostering. These
dynamics were characterised by three factors, the first of which was age. Age
was an important factor in terms of the participant’s approach to their
relationship with the foster children; some felt that being of a similar age made
it easier for them to get along:
75 – 77 “We all pretty much got on really well we we’re similar in age as well”
(Leona)
250 – 253 “My brother really got on with him cause they were similar in age, it’s-it’s
they liked to do the same things” (Matthew)
It was clear across each interview that participants had a preference to be the
oldest child within their household; through discussion of this subject they
affirmed this, some felt being the eldest of the family allowed them to adopt a
more responsible role, and in contrast the prospect of having older foster
siblings was unappealing:
155 – 157 “Cause I was the only girl, and the eldest of the youngest, I was like- I
wanted to look after them” (Samantha)
230 – 231 “I don’t think I would have liked to have been younger and have older
foster brothers and sisters” (Leona)
Leona, who had older and younger foster siblings, disliked being of a similar
age to some of the foster children and in spite of this, she found they were
more willing to confide in her instead of her parents:
178 – 180 “Because I was similar in age to them, they felt they could confide in me”
(Leona)
Matthew felt being much older than the foster children allowed him to create
more distance between them and himself, conversely he feels his younger
brother was ‘tangled up’ more with them, which he perceived to be a negative
issue:
27. 24
274 – 276 “He was really in that age that- he was with-w-with them all whereas I had
that distance, I was five, six, seven years older so” (Matthew)
For Andy, being nineteen when the fostering first began made him more
capable of approaching any potential challenges; he strongly attributes this to
a wider awareness of important issues which enabled him to be better
prepared:
282 – 285 “I think it’s like an underbelly of society that a lot of people are completely
reluctant to accept that it goes on. And I think (.) I’m mature enough now to sort of
see and comprehend what’s going on” (Andy)
Each participant understood the reason for why their family had decided to
foster, while they were typically not included in the decision making process,
they felt able to accept foster children into their household. This notion of
acceptance helped them to understand the decision to foster, thus aiding their
approach to the task:
576 – 577 “It was her earning a living from it and I was benefiting from it” (Sarah)
10 – 13 “We we’re all quite aware that she wanted to do it” (Andy)
For Samantha and Sian, who had brothers and sisters and were used to being
around many children, they did not feel challenged by the idea of having other
children living in their home:
44 – 46 “When we we’re younger we always babysat for other people’s children”
(Sian)
83-84 “That’s how it’s always been so I wouldn’t know any different” (Samantha)
Samantha describes two foster children as being “blood”, because they had
been fostered within her home for a long period of time:
23 – 24 “Yeahhh I wouldn’t know any different, they’ve had their surnames changed
and stuff” (Samantha)
For Leona, growing up with children to whom she was not blood related was
considered a normal dimension of her home life, as her mother had been
28. 25
fostering before she was born. Like Samantha she had an older brother who
was fostered, but whom the family adopted:
20 – 21 “I didn’t know any different because I knew my brother was fostered”
(Leona)
While this could be considered an extraordinary circumstance, Leona feels
this helped her to identify with the foster children. It may also reflect that the
integration of fostering into her family while she was at a young age made the
process easier for her:
203 – 204 “I just felt like one of them, I just felt the same as them I think” (Leona)
Each participant encountered challenges throughout the experience, and they
had their own ways of managing this:
100 – 102 “I had a boyfriend at the time so it was quite- it was nice cause I had some
sort of relief” (Sarah)
196 – 201 M: I was sort of- introverted-
P: Yeah-
M: -wanted to do my own thing sort of person. Especially when- when I got to my
teenage years (Matthew)
Despite all participants having to deal with negative issues (stealing, conflict
etc.), only Leona spoke of her jealousy towards the foster children, and how
she occasionally felt the foster children had ‘more’ than she did. She
describes having ‘her own’ social worker for support, which helped her to not
feel left out at times:
376 – 377 “There wasn’t any support. In that- like I only got it as a favour” (Leona)
3.3 Negative Experiences vs. Positive Experiences
Participants communicated clearly that the experience of fostering is
challenging, consequently they were exposed to a mixture of positive and
negative issues. While this made the nature of fostering conflicting they felt
able to realise the real benefits of foster care, and that these issues did not
29. 26
affect their overall view of the fostering experience. However, Sarah and
Matthew spoke of how having their possessions stolen was both upsetting
and disruptive:
344 – 346 “That’s important. But, she didn’t really care, and she kept saying to me
[mother] ‘It’s just THINGS, it doesn’t matter’. So I-I just adopted that attitude as well
and was like fine” (Sarah)
145 – 147 “I-a lot of my things were stolen and- things that I prize so I- completely-
you know, I went from s- I had a very sort of open, you know I- never thought-
“(Matthew)
Some participants spoke of instances of aggression towards their mothers, for
them this was considered to be the most disruptive issue. It was evident
through recollection of these events that this was produced the most negative
emotions:
305 – 307 “And she doesn’t- she’s always said like ‘No one’s going to intimidate me,
no one’s going to threaten me’, so even though she’s small she haha-“ (Sarah)
246 – 248 “…And sometimes they could (.) get violet towards my mother…” (Leona)
When asked about the positive aspects of the fostering experience, they
spoke of the eventual improvements in fostered children’s lives and displayed
a mature awareness of the importance their family played in improving their
lives:
508 – 512 “I’m so proud of my younger brothers ‘cause they could have turned out a
lot worse (.) I dunno it’s worth it in the end, it’s true what they say, you can change
someone’s life” (Samantha)
316 – 317 “Oh of course there is- seeing the improvement in every person that we’ve
had is like – VAST” (Sarah)
Some participants spoke a long lasting positive effect that fostering had on
themselves and their siblings; they fostering as a learning experience through
which their perspective was widened:
30. 27
392 – 394 “You’re exposed to more about, you know, society in general, which you
wouldn’t have known otherwise” (Matthew)
478 – 480 “she was completely changed and she was so involved and she just loves
it” (Andy)
3.4 Empathy
By enabling themselves to recognise the positive and negative aspects of the
fostering experience, some participants had adapted to a caring role. Through
this they felt they were able to empathise with all those involved, and in terms
of the foster children they were able to justify the reasons for their unwanted
behaviour:
728 – 732 “cause I think if I was fostered I would find it really really difficult I think-
I am very conscious of when I’m intruding, making someone uncomfortable so even
if I was living in someone else’s house I’d be really like- rrrrrrr” (Sarah)
116 – 118 “It would have been, it’s just quite, daunting thinking about what if that
child had been put with a family who weren’t quite as familiar” (Andy)
As displayed by the previous theme, most participants displayed great
concern for their parents, in particular mothers. It was evident that they were
concerned more of the impact fostering on them before themselves:
460 – 461 “and obviously I had to see all of that, which is quite hard I was confused I
didn’t want him to hurt my mum obviously” (Samantha)
748 – 751”Just when it upsets my mum it makes me really angry- but- I know it’s
really bad but my mums a star and I think she’s one of the best people she can be with
in this situation” (Sarah)
The participants also showed great concern for their younger siblings, and
understood that for the fostering experience would be harder for them to
manage; they felt their younger age left them more likely to be susceptible to
experience negative emotions:
31. 28
51 – 54 “I think it was slightly more difficult for my younger sister, I think she was-
initially she had that sort of element of, I wouldn’t say jealousy but sort of, uhh slight
undertone” (Andy)
374 – 377 “I think it hit her more than it hit us, we we’re more independent while she
was still dependent on mum and dad, and I think it hit her harder than it hit us” (Sian)
While Laura describes instances of conflict between herself and the fostered
children, she felt this conflict was perpetuated by the foster children’s
aggressive behaviour towards her nieces and nephews, and she felt
particularly protective of them:
157 – 159 “If they were like bullying my nieces of nephews or pushing them around
and then I used to- that’s-that’s- but that’s the bit I hate about it all” (Leona)
This selfless concern places participants, as they displayed qualities which
are normally attributed to foster parents. In discussions about the aspects of
fostering which were less appealing to them, participants displayed a
continued demonstration of their altruistic qualities of being able to recognise
the needs of the foster children before their own:
200 – 205 “I don’t understand this because this is obviously going to make her
adoption a lot more traumatic” (Andy)
212 -214 “But also like, be more understanding with people like. Umm, not to be so
judgemental because you never know they come from like what their background is.
(Samantha)
3.5 Placement Endings
All but one participant felt that the end of placements was the most difficult
period of the fostering process. They expressed feelings of upset and
sadness; with some feeling that they had become ‘attached’ to the children
who left their parents care. They understood placement endings were an
inevitable part of the fostering process, and consequently no negative feelings
were directed towards the fostered children. However they felt at times
placement endings could be sudden, often leaving them little time to prepare
for an appropriate goodbye:
32. 29
611 – 614 “Then suddenly they were like it will be in a month’s time, and then
suddenly she was texting me like ‘No he can’t go’. She accepted it but not that soon,
she’s not ready for it” (Sarah)
For Sian and Andy, they felt it was necessary to recognise that the fostered
children would not be in their parent’s care ‘forever’, and so retaining this
throughout their placement acted as a protective mechanism in an attempt to
prevent feelings of hurt:
58 – 61 “you know they got to come and got to go you know and, whether they go
back to family or whether they got to another carer or whether they’re adopted, you
know, its gonna come” (Sian)
136 – 141 A: It feels like there’s that initial getting used to a new person but then it’s
the same feeling of- I dunno you- a bond sort of develops quite quickly-
P: Yeah-
A: But then you know that is sort of gonna go (laughs). (Andy)
However one participant expressed feelings of guilt when fostered children
were returned to their original homes, because she felt despite the positive
reason for the child to leave, she understood her own attachment to the child
would ultimately be broken:
256 – 259 “I didn’t want them to go back to their mums obviously ‘cause I’d made a
great connection but when everyone was going I was it not like in a selfish way but
like ‘aw, why do they have to go’ sort of thing” (Samantha)
She expressed concern over the hurt caused by abrupt placement endings,
and felt that having to manage a great number of them left a lasting effect on
the way she currently forms relationships:
264 – 268 “Umm, I suppose it’s had like, an effect on, I dunno like, relationship wise?
‘Cause especially with short term fostering, I came used to like, like, getting a good
connection with someone and then all of a sudden they would go and I would never
see them again” (Samantha)
34. 31
Chapter 4: Discussion
4.1 Introduction
Past research regarding the children of foster carers has confirmed a range of
potential challenges which they may face. In particular, research has
addressed these challenges in relation to a link between the presence of
foster carer’s own children and the failure of foster placements (Farmer et al.,
2004; Sutton and Stack, 2012). The impact of these findings is validated
through many foster carers deciding to resign due to the effect fostering has
had on their own children (Triseliotis et al., 2000; Rhodes et al., 2001 Farmer
et al, 2004). While it is arguable past studies have provided valuable insight
into the experiences of foster carers’ children, with the exception of Sutton
and Stack (2012), few studies have addressed the way in which they
approach and manage the challenges they face.
4.2 Findings
The present study aimed to gain further insight into the views and experiences
of foster carers’ children, in relation to the way in which they manage the
experiences and challenges of foster care. Four themes were identified from
the data.
The first and perhaps most salient of the themes, ‘Household Dynamics’,
identified several factors that strongly influenced the participant’s approach
and management of their experience, most of which have been observed in
previous research. The first factor centered on age; which influenced how they
approached their relationship with the fostered children, and the majority felt it
was better to be older as opposed to same age, or younger. Previous
research has linked age to placement stability, and has found that placements
are more successful when the foster carer’s children are older (Berridge and
Cleaver, 1987; Pugh, 1996). It is possible that the participant’s drive to remain
the oldest child of the family is a reflection of their own identity, and for this to
be challenged by an older foster sibling, would invoke feelings of vulnerability
(Sutton and Stack, 2012).
35. 32
For Matthew, being the oldest allowed him to distance himself from the
fostering context, providing an appropriate barrier. Conversely his younger
brother, who was the same age as the fostered children, was more involved
with them. This supports previous literature suggesting, that foster placements
function best when the fostered children are a few years younger than the
children of foster carers (Kelly, 2000; Höjer and Nordenfors, 2004). This
appears to be due to an appropriate boundary being established, which allows
the foster carer’s children maintain their own personal space. It is also
arguable based on previous literature that an appropriate age gap allows the
children of foster carers to feel less threatened by the fostered children in
relation to their established position within the family (Twigg and Swan, 2007).
The notion of agreement between family members was found to be an
important factor. The majority of participants felt they had accepted the arrival
of foster children as it was something that their parents wanted, in particular
participants mentioned mothers. For two participants, they already had
adopted siblings as family members and so fostering did not introduce
dramatic changes to them. Past literature argues that the arrival of foster
children can be a difficult period due to the competition for parental attention
(Kaplan, 1988; Swan, 2002; Höjer, 2007). The participants of this study did
not view this as a prevalent issue; they recognised the importance of their
parent’s attention being focused to the fostered children. Interestingly
participants mentioned being excited about the prospect of gaining foster
siblings. This supports research regarding the benefits of positive thinking; the
children of foster carers appear to be able to protect their psychological well-
being during a potentially negative period (Capara and Steca, 2005).
Management of the fostering experience was also found to be an important
factor. Participants recognised the effects of fostering on the family as a
whole, and each appeared to have their own method of coping with this. It
appeared that most participants felt they could handle the challenges of
fostering by doing what any other child or young person would do; one female
participant felt that having a boyfriend distracted her from fostering and one
male participant felt ‘doing his own thing’ allowed him to distance himself from
fostering. While participants mentioned different forms of coping strategy; it is
36. 33
notable that most did not seek support from their own parents. Previous
literature indicates that children of foster carers are reluctant to share their
own concerns with their parents, not wishing to cause them further stress
(Twigg, 1993; Norrington, 2002; Swan, 2002; Nuske, 2006). However the
participants did not view this as a negative issue; they felt that their
relationship with their own parents was not challenged and that they were able
to approach them if they felt they had concerns.
The second theme uncovered was ‘Positive Experiences vs. Negative
Experiences’. Participants showed a strong awareness that the nature of
fostering brought about both positive and negative experiences. However,
despite having to contend with negative issues, they felt that they could
recognise the benefits of fostering above everything else. They acknowledged
having their possessions stolen and instances of aggression as stressful
events, however this did not lead them to disregard the benefits of fostering,
as they felt that the negative issues experienced were trivial compared to the
positive aspects. It is perhaps most notable that the participants were able to
recognise the benefits fostering could have for themselves; as a consequence
they felt more mature, capable and understanding of sensitive issues, a
finding prevalent throughout previous literature (Swan, 2000; Nuske, 2004;
Stack, 2012).
Participants noted observing improvements of the fostered children over the
course of their placement. They expressed pride and happiness when
recognising these improvements, and it would appear, that the recognition of
positive events within fostering enabled the children of foster carers to
continue with the fostering experience in spite of challenging events, as
supported by previous literature (Twigg and Swan, 2007; Stack, 2012). This is
further explained by the children of foster carers sense of self efficacy;
identifying as being part of a working team where they may improve the lives
of those who are less fortunate than themselves (Bandura, 1986; 1997).
In particular, one male (Matthew) seemed to recognise that the positive
experiences may be outweighed by the negatives. He argued that the
perceived benefits of fostering and widening of perspective were not
37. 34
necessary during his teenage years, and therefore felt they were not justified.
This supports a concern raised by Twigg (1994) who argues that the benefits
of fostering should not be overstated and that the children of foster carers may
be reluctant to give their honest views. Despite this, the majority of
participants felt that they had benefited from the positive aspects, with most
feeling that they had matured as a result of the fostering experience.
The third theme outlined was ‘Empathy’. In terms of negative experiences
participants were more concerned for the welfare of their relatives than
themselves, particularly when foster children were displaying undesirable
behaviour. The participants expressed the most concern for their mothers, as
this caused the most feelings of anger and concern. Despite this possibly
impacting on them, they were able to justify it by appreciating the negative
circumstances which led the foster children to enter the care system. This
empathy shows mature understanding of the circumstances surrounding the
fostering task, which supports a previous finding (Swan, 2000) attributing this
quality to the children of foster carers nature as compassionate beings.
The feelings of empathy expressed by participants provide further evidence
that the children of foster carers are caring and sensitive individuals (Watson
and Jones, 2002) and their empathetic thinking would seem to overcome the
difficulties surrounding the fostered children’s unwanted behaviour. This
theme supports previous findings which imply that the children of foster carers
are capable of developing their emotional literacy skills throughout the
fostering experience. Their lowered ego-centrism allows them to see the world
from the perspective of others, contributing to their resilience throughout the
experience itself (Joseph and Strain, 2003; Humphrey et al, 2007).
The final theme concerns ‘Placement Endings’. All but one of the participants
regarded this period as a difficult phase in the fostering experience, and all
participants agreed this period was one of mixed emotions. However, they
understood that it was a necessary period, as foster children would eventually
have to leave. The participant’s attitudes towards this issue varied; some
maintained it was easier to remember that the fostered children would
eventually leave, and they bared this in mind when building a relationship with
38. 35
them. This acted as a protective mechanism that can be likened to previous
research, stating that the children of foster carers were able to interpret the
experience of placement endings as a positive event, and the fostering
household are given the opportunity to ‘regroup’ and prepare for the next
placement (Sutton and Stack, 2012).
Some participants expressed feelings of guilt and sadness when the foster
children left their home; this was explained by them feeling they had
developed a good relationship with them and so, this period was regarded as
a time of loss in their family. As a consequence, one female participant
expressed concern for the way she presently forms relationships. This
supports previous findings, arguing that children of foster carers may
experience emotional harm as a result of feelings of loss and guilt (Pugh,
1996; Younes and Harp, 2007).
While the issue of losing parental attention was mentioned in the present
study, it was not found to be a pivotal issue. Previous studies argue that the
children of foster carer’s experience loss of parental attention and
consequently they can experience negative emotions (Watson and Jones,
2002; Höjer and Nordenfors, 2003). It is possible that the participants of the
present study may have experienced loss of parental attention, however they
may not have interpreted this event as being a ‘loss’, but rather an inevitability
of the fostering experience (Norrington, 2002; Nuske, 2006).
4.3 Limitations
While the present study supports previous findings, there are limitations to
consider. The use of qualitative methods provides a retrospective approach
which allows research to gain valuable insight into the experiences of
individuals (Belk, 2007). However, this method is limited by its reliance on
participants to recall information. While crucial and meaningful information
was provided by the participants in the present study, it is likely that some vital
information was not recalled by them. As participants in this study had an age
range from twenty-two to thirty-four, it is possible that the events discussed
during the interviews were harder to recall for some than others. It would
39. 36
therefore have been advantageous for participants in this study to have been
closer in age.
It must also be recognised when conducting qualitative research that analysis
is subject to the interpretation of the researcher, and so the results are
engaged with a double hermeneutic; meaning that they are not exclusively
applicable to reality (Giddens, 1987).
While the present study did not reveal any perceived gender differences, it
must be noted that female participants outweighed the male participants.
Therefore, future studies should recognise this as a potential issue and recruit
an equal gender split in order to explore this further.
4.4 Future Research
Future research should consider the issues discussed in order to provide
further validation of their salience to the fostering context. In doing so it may
be possible to understand how these issues can be regulated in practice, e.g.
placement matching (placing foster children in the most suitable setting)
(Twigg and Swan, 2007).
While the present study has demonstrated that foster carer’s children are
capable of being resilient and mature individuals, the potential harm that some
of these issues may illicit should not be ignored. Greater understanding and
awareness of these issues may contribute to greater training for prospective
foster parents. Thus allowing them to consider and hopefully divert potential
issues which may affect their own children appropriately (Walsh and
Campbell, 2009).
4.5 Reflexive Analysis
My parents have been foster carers since 2001 and subsequently many of my
previous experiences related to some of the issues which were the focus of
the present study. Therefore, I have a strong appreciation for the benefits of
fostering, but also an awareness that many of these issues are not adequately
addressed at the detriment of all those involved in the fostering household.
Due to the personal significance of the issues discussed presently, it is
40. 37
possible that my own experiences have led me to focus on issues more
salient to myself. It is possible that some issues have been addressed in
greater detail than others. This should be considered when interpreting the
results.
4.6 Conclusion
The findings of the present study support previous literature concerning the
experiences of foster carers own children (Watson and Jones, 2002; Twigg
and Swan, 2007; Höjer, 2007; Sutton and Stack, 2012). These findings
identify numerous potential challenges faced by the children of foster carers
and provide insight into how these experiences are approached and managed
by them within the fostering context. The small body of research indicates that
while these issues have been explored in some measure, there is still a lack
of research concerning how these issues can be managed. The results of the
present study highlight the prevalence of these issues; however it is clear that
the children of foster carers can benefit greatly from the experience which
leaves a long lasting impression upon them.
While there are some limitations to consider the present study is
methodologically sound. Further study of this area should consider
interviewing a larger sample of participants and aim to replicate the findings
observed in present and previous literature.
41. 38
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endings?. Children’s Work Force Development Council (CWDC) Retrieved
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biological children and their families. Child Welfare, 65(4), 21-40.
46. 43
Appendices
Appendix I
Interview Schedule
When did the fostering begin?
i. How old were you?
What do you remember about the decision to foster?
i. Both parents/One parent?
Were you involved in the decision to foster?
i. What do you remember about how you felt during this time?
Do you have any brothers and sisters?
i. How did they feel about the idea of fostering?
How many children did your parents foster?
Do you remember the first day they arrived?
Were you made aware of their situation?
i. Was confidentiality discussed with you?
What relationship did you have with the fostered children?
i. Were you seen as a younger/older brother/sister?
ii. Did you spend much time with them?
Do you feel you had a particular role?
i. Did you get involved/help your parents?
Did your relationship with you parent/parents change?
i. Do you feel you had less attention?
47. 44
ii. Were they supportive of your own situation in terms of
fostering?
Was there anything that affected you most?
i. Conflict, stealing, aggressive behaviour?
What was the most positive aspect of fostering?
What was your relationship with social services/social workers?
Did you go holiday together? / Share activities with them and your
parents?
On the whole what is your view of fostering?
Is there anything you would like to add?
