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2016
Jabrasce' Journal 4
Christian Youth
(JJ4CY)
[Navigating through relationships for
young adults, references from the Bible]
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
2
Abstract
I great you all in the name of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.
This report is not written to give advice on relationship per se, but to somewhat put Biblical factual
guidance in order to equip your journey from being single to raising a family with informed decision
making in reference to the Bible. Nor is this an assumption that every single Bible verse in the Bible
under each of the below topics in discussion has been considered, therefore I encourage you my
brethren and beloved to visit www.jabrasce.com to contribute more verses. This paper was solely
written to help myself navigate through my own relationship value chain and answer some of the
questions I had through my engagement.
I solely believe that the Bible has an answer to every question we may have in some form or another.
Therefore it is important for us as young people to use the Bible as our first point of reference in
decision making and thereafter incorporate personal advices one may receive from those who have
experienced different life events. The Bible is able to help us build a solid foundation in order to
assist us as young people to judge what is right in front of God's eyes.
Research is the foundation of decision making and the completion of the same very decision taken™.
In this regards, let us keep with us the words of Hosea 4 vs. 6: my people are destroyed for lack of
knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the
law of thy God, I will also forget thy children1
. Let us also keep the words from the book of wisdom,
Proverbs 1 vs. 6: the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and
instruction.
1
King James Version (KJV)
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
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First published in South Africa in 2016 by
Jabrasce' Journal of Christian Youth Research (JJCYR).
The mission of Jabrasce' Christian Research is to improve
understanding of the
fundamentals the Bible can teach us as young people in navigating through different
circumstance and situations in life within the 21st century. It is also to bring awareness to
the youth on how the Bible is still relevant today and also to promote
Bible reading amongst young people.
Copyright © Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY) 2016
The moral right of the author has been asserted.
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no
part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or introduced into a retrieval
system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying,
recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of both the
Copyright owner and the publisher of this report.
Available at: www.jabrasce.com
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
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Introduction
The Bible is still relevant today in answering all our questions in one way or another, this report will
aim to assist us as young people in thinking about the different questions we might have regarding:
being single, thinking of marriage, marriage life (role of man, wife), divorce, soluting problems in
marriage and raising children.
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
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Navigating singlehood for the youth, what we can learn from the Bible?
Philippians 4 vs. 6 reminds us that we should not worry about anything, but in all our prayers we
should ask God for what we need, always asking him with a thankful heart.
Now often when we pray to end singlehood through asking the Lord for a husband or for a wife, we
often find ourselves wondering, how will I know that the person I will meet one day is the same very
person whom God has formed for me using my own very rib, just as God did so with Adam and Eve?
And how will I know that this person I will meet or have already met is the right husband God has
created for me? I would like to believe that most single young adults think about this question once in
his/her single hood, sometimes this thought walks with us in our relationship value chain as young
people, from when you are single, to when you start dating and thinking of marriage, until you get
married and start a family together.
I used to not take this precaution one has to take when asking God for a prudent wife or a loving
husband seriously, however I have since learnt that one needs to make sure that they are making the
right choice when deciding to leave single hood, pray and fast about it and ask the Lord to guide you
through your life partner selection process.
Let's start our journey from the book of Genesis 1 vs. 27, here we are reminded first and foremost that
God made man in his own image and male and female he made them, when we read further from
Genesis 2 vs. 18 God reminds us again that as much as being single is good sometimes, it is how ever
not God's intention for things to be this way, He then says, it is not good for a man to be alone, I will
make for him a suitable helper. The word suitable reminds us that Gods wants us to have partners that
are made for us, as we discussed before. It is therefore important to ask God to provide a prudent
suitable wife or husband for us as young people. After God has given us a suitable wife, as a man one
has to now gain the courage to leave his mother and father to be one with his wife, we see this in
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
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Genesis 2 vs. 24. When leaving single hood make sure you are ready to lose your selfish ways in
order to be one flesh with your wife or husband as God has instructed. Let's also look at the book of
Numbers chapter 30 vs. 3 where Moses gives instructions to the leaders of the tribes of Israel on
vows, he then states, when a young woman still living in her father's house makes a vow to give
something to the Lord or promises to abstain from something, she must do everything that she vowed
or promised unless her father raises an objection when he hears about it, this reminds us of the
importance in vowing to stay single and not engage in sin while single.
The book of Ecclesiastes which contains thoughts of a philosopher who reflected deeply on how short
and contradictory life is emphasised how two (2) is better than one (1). This is so because they can
help one another when one falls. It is also horrible to sleep alone when it's cold because you can't
keep yourself warm. When you take this in a figurative or lateral manner it still repatriates the same
message.
Often we always think to ourselves as young people, "why should I date, I am still young, I have all
the time in the world, well that could be true no doubt about that, but let's also remember what the
prophet Isaiah said to us in chapter 4 vs. 1, where he reminds us of the women of Jerusalem on how
in that very day "one day" they will take hold of one man and say, we will eat our own food and
provide our own clothes, only let us say you are our husband so that we won't have to endure the
shame of being unmarried. This shame can also be further supported by the story of Lot's daughters in
Genesis 19 vs. 31 when they become desperate to have children and they complained on how there
are no man left in the land to marry them so they slept with their own father, very shameful.
We can use this scripture as young women to reflect on our life, the more you wait and not pray to
God to give you your rightful husband the more you risk being desperate one day for a husband, we
see this happening today, where both women and man settle for anyone who comes and ask for their
hand in marriage due to being desperate, they then agree and risk having an unhappy marriage,
although this is not always the case. Being unmarried is a very dangerous situation to find yourself in,
we can take reference from Hosea of whom the Lord instructed to go and marry so his wife will not
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be unfaithful, I see Hosea at this point being engaged and God instructing him to marry at once so he
can edify his wife. We see this happening today, were we get engaged for too long, let this be a
reminder for us to save when we start working so we don’t get engaged for too long.
So far we have investigated reasons not to stay single, but if we look at the story of Philip on the book
of Acts 21 vs. 9, we see that he had 4 unmarried daughters who prophesised, which shows us that
God can still show great favour in your life even if you remain single. The book of 1st Corinthians
chapter 7 from vs. 1 throughout to vs. 40 gives us great insights on some of the recurring questions
we have about marriage, of which Paul was writing to address questions the Corinthians had on
Christian life and faith. On vs. 1 Paul takes a different spin on what we have been discussing before
and points out how a man does well not to marry, but he then kills this idea correlating it to the many
challenges we are faced with as Christians today and he then further says, "because there is too much
immorality in the world it is better for every man to have his own wife and every woman her
husband", in vs. 8 he further addresses the unmarried and further console them that they can stay
single like him only if they will be able to handle living alone. He further reminds them on vs. 26 and
27 on staying single if they can, but Paul then reminds us that staying single must not just be for the
sake of it and we read this in vs. 32. However but if you choose to do so make sure that you concern
yourself with the Lord's work in hope that you do it to please God in both body and spirit (Chapter,
34).
When we read this verse we see immediately that if you chose to remain single make sure you remain
faithful to God by giving your body and soul to God, 100%, anything other than that it means you
cannot hold yourself therefore you must marry in order for you to be concerned with pleasing your
husband, again Paul reminds the Corinthians in vs. 38 that if you can stay single you do well. Paul
closes of his respond by saying this is his opinion, but I would believe that Paul's opinion is
worthwhile noting because he had the Holy Spirit in him as every man who has writing the word of
God did.
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It is not God's intention for us to stay single if you cannot handle yourself in doing so, being
unmarried can and might bring you shame in the future, so when you do find your rightful partner
make sure you marry in time to eliminate sin, at some point in time you will need to leave mommy
and daddy and join together with your wife and husband, and at the same time you can stay single if
you want to, but remember this comes with great responsibility and you need to then give your body
to God, if you cannot do this, please marry.
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So let's take it now you decide you want to marry and you have prayed to God who then
because he is faithful sends forth your missing rib and you start dating in a Godly manner,
what can we learn from the Bible in this difficult stage of our relationship value chain?
Exodus 22 vs. 16 to 17 emphasises how if you sleep with a virgin who is not engaged you need to
marry her, and pay for her the virgin price, this is relevant for us who might have made mistakes
when we are single and committed sin.
On a more positive note: well firstly congratulations for finding your missing rib, the book of
wisdom, Proverbs chapter 18 vs. 22 reassures us that when you find a wife you find a good thing and
it shows that the Lord is good to you. This should really assure those who fear getting married and
feel that marriage will be the end of them, we often think like that as young people, but please be
reassured that God has been good to you by giving you your wife so make sure you take care of her,
and she of him. God's goodness can be further explained in Jeremiah chapter 16 vs. 2, God spoke to
Jeremiah and said, do not marry or have children in a place like this. So we need to wait for God and
allow him to direct us in our path to marriage. We can see more evidence of how God is involved in
our path to marriage further on Luke 1 vs. 27 when the angel spoke about a young women who was
promised in marriage to Joseph, this repatriates that God already knows who we are going to be
married to even before we do so, hence the importance of asking God to send your partner when you
are ready to do marry.
Again Paul educates us further about the road to marriage in his letter in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs.
2 all the way to 38. In vs. 36 he reminds us of those who are engaged, he states: in the case of an
engaged couple who have decided not to marry and if the man feels that he is not acting properly
towards the young woman and if his passions are too strong and he feels they ought to marry then
they should get married as he wants to, there is no sin in this. On the other hand in vs. 37 Paul says,
but if a man without being forced to do so, has firmly made up his mind not to marry and if he has his
will under complete control and has already decided to his own mind what to do, then he does well
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
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not to marry the young woman, let us also remember however that this might as well apply to a
woman who then decided when she is engaged she doesn’t want to marry anymore. So in these two
cases if the man marries he does well but if he also does not marry he does even better.
Engagement does not mean marriage, if any of you decide you want to go your separate ways then do
so, there is no sin in this, rather now than filing for divorce when married. What do we learn from
this? use this period to know each other and gauge if you will make each other happy and make the
marriage which is the next step work, if you see that things are not working well , split, go your
separate ways, Paul reminds us that there is no sin in this so don’t be afraid.
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For those who made it through this stage with their partners, congratulations again, for those
who didn't and remain single remember what the lord expects of you when you are single, give
your body to God and do not sin and wait patiently for the Lord in prayer and fasting. Let's dig
deeper and see what the Bible has to share with us in terms of marriage.
I am under the assumption that we all know the importance of marriage and its resemblance in the
kingdom of God. Marriage is a forever situation till death do you part. So make sure you know what
you are getting into and not let excitement carry you into what you are not ready for. This is serious
business.
The book of Deuteronomy reminds us as man not to desire another man's wife, we see how this act is
punishable by death in Job 31 vs. 9 to 11. Numbers 30 vs. 10 also reminds us that, if a woman
decides to take a vow to abstain from something she must be true to her vow, unless if the husband
objects.
Now let's refer back to the book of wisdom, Proverbs 5 vs. 15 to 22 where Solomon son of David
reminds us to be faithful to our wives as man and give our love to them alone, because if you go and
have children by other women than your wife those children will do you no good, so be happy with
your wife and find your joy with the woman your married, pretty and graceful as a deer, let her
charms keep you happy let her surround you with her love, why should you give your love to another
woman, why should you prefer charms for another man's wife? Have some self control before you
bring death to yourself.
For those who do not like following God's instructions concerning marriage remember what Solomon
says to us in Proverbs chapter 6 vs. 24 to 35: instructions can keep you away from bad women he
says, don’t be tempted by her beauty and be trapped by her flirting eyes, a man can hire a prostitute
for a price equal to a loaf of bread, but adultery will, not can, but will cost him all he has. Think about
it, those who go through divorce because they cheated are often left with nothing after the court cases
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
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just as the Bible has warned us that adultery will leave us with nothing. Be careful you have been
warned. It is just as dangerous to sleep with another man's wife, whoever does so will suffer. A man
who commits adultery has not any sense, he is just destroying himself, he will be dishonoured and
beaten up and he will be permanently disgraced.
A husband is never angrier than when he is jealous, his revenge knows no limit, he will not accept
any payment, and no amount of gifts will satisfy his anger. I always would ask myself what is
adultery really, adultery is when a married man sleeps with another man's wife, fornication however
is when a man sleeps with an unmarried women. Stay away from both, the Bible warns us of a
husband's furry and jealousy.
Now one can ask how do I stay away from such activities, well let's refer to Proverbs 7 vs. 4 to 5:
treat wisdom as your sister, and insights as your closest friend, they will keep you away from other
men's wives and women of seductive words. But where and how do I get wisdom, I would ask myself
again? well that's simple, James 1 vs. 5 instructs us that if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God,
who gives generously to all without finding fault and it will be given to you. Now concerning these
seductive women whom man are always prompt to falling for, the Bible warns us not let such women
win our hearts and that we shouldn’t go wandering after them, they have been the ruin of many men
and caused the death of too many to count as proverbs 7 vs. 25 to 26 informs us.
Now the Bible has given a lot of warning directed to men. Young women, please note what proverbs
21 vs. 19 reminds us of, better to live out in the desert than with a nagging complaining wife. Young
men please do not let the devil deceive you into using this as an excuse in committing adultery. For
remember the words in James 1 vs. 13 which says, when tempted, no one should say, God is tempting
me, for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone. This is merely a reminder to wives
to be considerate and not nag your husband, this is further supported in Proverbs 27 vs. 15 to 16, a
nagging wife is like water going drip drip on a rainy day, how can you keep her quite? Have you tried
to stop the wind or ever tried to hold a handful of oil?
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Now men please take caution on a cheating wife, I hear people always saying that women are good in
hiding their adultery ways than men, well that's a debate for another day, however proverbs had
already warned us about the cheating wife, it says in Proverbs 30 vs. 20: this is how an unfaithful
wife commits acts, she commits adultery, has a bath and says but I haven’t done anything wrong.
So for women let us remember Proverbs 30 vs. 21 which remind us of the thing the earth itself hates,
in which one of the things include a hateful woman who gets married and a servant woman who takes
the place of her mistress. Adultery does not only affect the soul but the Bible shows us the
practicality of how it destroys our lives in a financial manner as well, we see this in Proverbs chapter
31 vs. 3: don’t spend all your energy on sex and all your money on women, they have destroyed
kings (kings who were rich and had everything, so what damage will these acts do to you?). These
type of woman are further analysed in chapter 7 vs. 26
Now I know most of us are probably thinking by now how horrible women are right, well proverbs
31 vs. 10 to 31shows us of the power of a good capable woman. How she is worth more than jewels,
her husband puts confidence in her, as long as she lives she does him good and never harm, she keeps
herself busy with work, and makes food for her family of which she gets up early and prepares for her
family, she is a hard worker and works hard, she is generous to the poor and not afraid of the future,
so there are a lot of good wives in the world. Man let us love our wives, wives let us also love our
husbands.
Now, like everything else in the world let us also remember that there is a time for everything even in
marriage. Ezekiel 18 vs. 5 warns us about having intercourse with our wives when on their periods, it
is unclean. But let's not take intimacy for granted in marriage, we see that intimacy is important in
marriage but you can however agree between the two of you to take a break from it for prayer, we see
this in 1st Corinthians 7 vs. 5. Now we also know about this concept of giving your husband or wife
a "passport" to go somewhere right, well for those with married friends please respect their marriage
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especially if it's a new. Remember the words in Luke 14 vs. 20, I just got married and for that reason I
cannot come. So let's respect the space of newlyweds and give them time with one other.
Most people also bring up the issue of getting married to an unbeliever, especially in the times we
live in today, where not a lot of people believe in God, I have heard many people saying they believe
in the "higher power", this could mean anything, but that’s a write up for another day, well going
back to getting married to unbelievers, the Bible tells us that there is nothing wrong with doing so, we
see this in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 14, where marrying an unbeliever actually makes them
acceptable in front of God by being united as one with their partner. Remember how we have
discussed the importance of Marriage above, well when you look at 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 39,
it clearly shows us how Marriage is a long life commitment separated by death. This is further
supported in Hebrews 13 vs. 4 where the Bible reminds us that Marriage is to be honoured by all, and
husbands and wives must be faithful to each other and how God will judge those who are immoral
and commit adultery. Again when we read Revelations 2 vs. 22 we see the main massage of marriage
being repatriated again, do not commit adultery and love each other, therefore let's remember that this
is a life time commitment.
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Well unfortunately every marriage has its own challenges right? So then what happens when
someone cheats on you, and you want to divorce, can you divorce? Or do you solute and
continue with your marriage? Let's consult God's word and see:
As Christians and if it has nothing to do with adultery we need to try and solute the marriage, the
Bible in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 27 says: have you got a wife? then don’t try to get rid of her,
Ephesians 4 vs. 26 also advices us that if you become angry, do not let your anger lead you into sin
and do not stay angry all day, so make sure you solve your issues before you go to sleep, remember
you are now one thing with your partner. We also see in vs. 31 to 32, that we should get rid of all
bitterness, passion and anger. No more shouting or insults, no more hateful feelings of any sort.
Instead, be kind and tender hearted to one another and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you
through Christ.
Let's also take a look at some divorce teachings from the Bible. Leviticus 21 vs.14 reminds us
especially man not to marry divorced women, we also see this again in Jeremiah 3 vs. 1, which states,
if a man divorces his wife and she leaves him and becomes another man's wife, he cannot take her
back again. In Luke 16 vs. 18, it also states if any man who divorces his wife and marries another
woman commits adultery and the man who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery. 1st
Corinthians 7 vs. 10 to 11 also warns the wife that she may not leave her husband but if she does, she
must remain single or else be reconciled to her husband and a husband must not divorce his wife. vs.
12, 13 to 15 also reminds us that if an unbelieving woman decides to stay with her husband he must
not divorce her, however if the unbeliever is the one who leaves the Christian wife or husband then
the believing partner is free to act. So remember if you divorce and remarry you commit adultery
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What about those who have families, what does the Bible advice us on what the role of a man
should be and what the role of a wife and kids should be?
A man should fulfil his duty as a husband, and a woman should fulfil her duty as a wife, and each
should satisfy the other's needs. Submit yourself to one another because of your reverence for Christ
(Ephesians 5 vs. 21)
1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 3 again reminds us that a husband must fulfil his duty and a wife must
also do the same in marriage, husbands are also to love their wives as Christ loved the church we see
this in Ephesians 5 vs. 25, vs. 28 also tells us that men ought to love their wives just as they love their
own bodies. A man who loves his wife loves himself. Husbands must love their wives and not be
harsh to them, we see this in Colossians 3 vs. 19, 1st Thessalonians 4 vs. 4 also reminds us as
husbands that we must learn to live with our wives.
The Bible also has lessons for those who are moving into ministry and fulfilling the calling of God,
we read in 1st Timothy chapter 3 vs. 1 to 7: this is a true saying: if a man is eager to be a church
leader, he desires an excellent work. A church leader must be without fault, he must have only one
wife, vs. 4 further states that a man of God must be able to manage his own family well and make his
children obey him with respect, for if a man does not know how to manage his own family how can
he take care of the church. So let us remember as husbands to live with our wives with the proper
understanding that they are weaker than us. Treat them with respect, because they also will receive,
together with you, God's gift of life. Do this so that nothing will interfere with your prayers
Now, the Bible reminds us in Proverbs 12 vs. 4 that a good wife is her husbands' pride and joy, but a
wife who brings shame on her husband is like cancer in his bones. Proverbs 14 vs. 1 also shows us
how homes are made by the wisdom of women, but destroyed by foolishness. Earlier on we discussed
how marriage is a life time commitment, woman are also reminded about this in Romans 7 vs. 2, a
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married woman is bound by law to her husband as long as the husbands lives, this is further
supported in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 10: A wife is not the master of her own body, but her
husband is, same applies for the men (1st Corinthians 7 vs. 4), vs. 10 also re-emphasis how a wife
must not leave her husband and how a Christian wife must submit to her husband as Christians do,
we are further reminded of this in Colossians 3 vs.18.
Wives must not gossip, they must be of good character and must be sober and honest in everything,
we are reminded of this in the character of a wife who is also a helper at the church. Titus 3 vs. 3 to 5,
reminds the older women who are servants in the church and are also wives that, they should behave
as women who live a wholly life, they must not be slanders or slaves to wine. They must teach what
is good in order to train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self controlled
and pure and to be good housewives who submit to their husbands so that no one will speak evil of
the message that comes from God.
For the women let me conclude with 1st Peter 3 vs. 1 to 5: you should not use outward aids to make
yourselves beautiful, such as the way you do your hair, or the jewellery you put on, or the dress you
wear. Instead your beauty should consist of your true inner self, the ageless beauty of a gentle and
quite spirit, which if of the greatest value in God's sight.
Marriage is a 2 way street, hence the Bible also gives us guidance as man on how we should live with
our wives and also how we should raise our families as the head of the house. The role of a husband
is a very crucial one in family building, let us remember God's words in 1st Corinthians 11 vs. 9: and
man was not made for woman, but woman was made for man. If you look at it from vs. 18 it says for
man did not come from woman, but woman from man. The reason I mention these 2 verses is to
repatriate the importance of the husband in society as a whole especially in relation to his wife. There
are many scriptures in the Bible that give us guidance on how to act as husbands, below I have
selected some to help us realise this role. The book of Ecclesiastes 9 vs. 9 tells us as husbands to
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enjoy life with the woman you love, as long as you live the useless life that God has given you in this
world. Enjoy every useless day of it because that is all you will get for all your trouble.
1st Corinthians reminds us that a man should fulfil his duties just a s a wife should and we should
love our wives just as Christ loved the church, we see this in Ephesians 5 vs. 25, vs. 28 further
reminds us a s man that if we love our wives we also love our selves. This is again re-emphasised in 1
Thessalonians 4 vs. 4. For us as Christian man it is important to remember 1st Timothy 3 vs. 1 to 7,
which reminds us how a Christian man can best live with his wife the way God intends leaders in
Christ within the church and outside to do so.
The Bible also gives us guidance not only as women and husbands but it also gives us guidance on
how we as a couple should and can raise our kids. We take a look at this by studying the role Kids
should take within the family in behaviour. The book of proverbs tells us how kids should behave.
The main message on the role of kids is shown in 1 Peter 5 vs. 5, that young people should submit to
the elders and also that as young people we should have self control as Titus 2 vs. 6 suggests we do.
Colossians 3 vs. 20 reminds us that it is our Christian duty to obey our parents as that is what pleases
God. In this spirit let us also remember the words in Deuteronomy 5 vs. 16 which says, honour your
mother and father that you may live long, the importance of this command is further supported in
Ephesians chapter 6 vs. 2.
The book of wisdom, Proverbs, elaborates further on how as young people we should live with our
parents and also gives us guidelines on how we should behave ourselves in society. Let's take a look
at Proverbs chapter 1 vs. 8 which reminds us to pay attention to what our mother and father tells us to
do, this is also further supported in 4 vs.1, we see this re-addressed again in chapter 13 vs.1. Let us
remember as young people to take care of our parents in their old age, just as proverbs 23 vs. 25
instructs us to do so. Listen to your father, without him you wouldn’t exist. When your mother is old,
show her your appreciation, this is further supported in chapter 30 vs. 17.
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The main message we can take as young people is shown in Ecclesiastics chapter 11 vs. 9 to 10:
young people enjoy your youth. Be happy while you are still young. Do what you want to do and
follow your heart's desire. But remember that God is going to judge you for whatever you do. Don't
let anything worry you or cause you pain. You are not going to be young forever. In all you do,
always remember Proverbs 10 vs. 1: wise children make their father proud but foolish ones bring
their mothers grief, we see the same message again in chapter 15 vs.20
I hope this has given you some insights you can apply to your daily life as it has for me. Let us
remember that the Bible can be a good tool in navigating us through different life scenarios we may
experience. I hope after reading this text you will be motivated to keep reading the Bible everyday
and meditate on it day and night, don’t let it depart from your mouth and always make sure you use it
as spiritual weapon in every situation, and remember the confidence to have in approaching God:
that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us whatever
we ask we know that we have what we asked of him.
Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016)
20
God loves you, seek wisdom so you may not be
misguided
Available at: www.jabrasce.com

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Navigating through-relationships-for-young-adults-references-from-the-bible-201605-pdf

  • 1. 2016 Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY) [Navigating through relationships for young adults, references from the Bible]
  • 2. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 2 Abstract I great you all in the name of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. This report is not written to give advice on relationship per se, but to somewhat put Biblical factual guidance in order to equip your journey from being single to raising a family with informed decision making in reference to the Bible. Nor is this an assumption that every single Bible verse in the Bible under each of the below topics in discussion has been considered, therefore I encourage you my brethren and beloved to visit www.jabrasce.com to contribute more verses. This paper was solely written to help myself navigate through my own relationship value chain and answer some of the questions I had through my engagement. I solely believe that the Bible has an answer to every question we may have in some form or another. Therefore it is important for us as young people to use the Bible as our first point of reference in decision making and thereafter incorporate personal advices one may receive from those who have experienced different life events. The Bible is able to help us build a solid foundation in order to assist us as young people to judge what is right in front of God's eyes. Research is the foundation of decision making and the completion of the same very decision taken™. In this regards, let us keep with us the words of Hosea 4 vs. 6: my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children1 . Let us also keep the words from the book of wisdom, Proverbs 1 vs. 6: the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction. 1 King James Version (KJV)
  • 3. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 3 First published in South Africa in 2016 by Jabrasce' Journal of Christian Youth Research (JJCYR). The mission of Jabrasce' Christian Research is to improve understanding of the fundamentals the Bible can teach us as young people in navigating through different circumstance and situations in life within the 21st century. It is also to bring awareness to the youth on how the Bible is still relevant today and also to promote Bible reading amongst young people. Copyright © Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY) 2016 The moral right of the author has been asserted. All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of both the Copyright owner and the publisher of this report. Available at: www.jabrasce.com
  • 4. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 4 Introduction The Bible is still relevant today in answering all our questions in one way or another, this report will aim to assist us as young people in thinking about the different questions we might have regarding: being single, thinking of marriage, marriage life (role of man, wife), divorce, soluting problems in marriage and raising children.
  • 5. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 5 Navigating singlehood for the youth, what we can learn from the Bible? Philippians 4 vs. 6 reminds us that we should not worry about anything, but in all our prayers we should ask God for what we need, always asking him with a thankful heart. Now often when we pray to end singlehood through asking the Lord for a husband or for a wife, we often find ourselves wondering, how will I know that the person I will meet one day is the same very person whom God has formed for me using my own very rib, just as God did so with Adam and Eve? And how will I know that this person I will meet or have already met is the right husband God has created for me? I would like to believe that most single young adults think about this question once in his/her single hood, sometimes this thought walks with us in our relationship value chain as young people, from when you are single, to when you start dating and thinking of marriage, until you get married and start a family together. I used to not take this precaution one has to take when asking God for a prudent wife or a loving husband seriously, however I have since learnt that one needs to make sure that they are making the right choice when deciding to leave single hood, pray and fast about it and ask the Lord to guide you through your life partner selection process. Let's start our journey from the book of Genesis 1 vs. 27, here we are reminded first and foremost that God made man in his own image and male and female he made them, when we read further from Genesis 2 vs. 18 God reminds us again that as much as being single is good sometimes, it is how ever not God's intention for things to be this way, He then says, it is not good for a man to be alone, I will make for him a suitable helper. The word suitable reminds us that Gods wants us to have partners that are made for us, as we discussed before. It is therefore important to ask God to provide a prudent suitable wife or husband for us as young people. After God has given us a suitable wife, as a man one has to now gain the courage to leave his mother and father to be one with his wife, we see this in
  • 6. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 6 Genesis 2 vs. 24. When leaving single hood make sure you are ready to lose your selfish ways in order to be one flesh with your wife or husband as God has instructed. Let's also look at the book of Numbers chapter 30 vs. 3 where Moses gives instructions to the leaders of the tribes of Israel on vows, he then states, when a young woman still living in her father's house makes a vow to give something to the Lord or promises to abstain from something, she must do everything that she vowed or promised unless her father raises an objection when he hears about it, this reminds us of the importance in vowing to stay single and not engage in sin while single. The book of Ecclesiastes which contains thoughts of a philosopher who reflected deeply on how short and contradictory life is emphasised how two (2) is better than one (1). This is so because they can help one another when one falls. It is also horrible to sleep alone when it's cold because you can't keep yourself warm. When you take this in a figurative or lateral manner it still repatriates the same message. Often we always think to ourselves as young people, "why should I date, I am still young, I have all the time in the world, well that could be true no doubt about that, but let's also remember what the prophet Isaiah said to us in chapter 4 vs. 1, where he reminds us of the women of Jerusalem on how in that very day "one day" they will take hold of one man and say, we will eat our own food and provide our own clothes, only let us say you are our husband so that we won't have to endure the shame of being unmarried. This shame can also be further supported by the story of Lot's daughters in Genesis 19 vs. 31 when they become desperate to have children and they complained on how there are no man left in the land to marry them so they slept with their own father, very shameful. We can use this scripture as young women to reflect on our life, the more you wait and not pray to God to give you your rightful husband the more you risk being desperate one day for a husband, we see this happening today, where both women and man settle for anyone who comes and ask for their hand in marriage due to being desperate, they then agree and risk having an unhappy marriage, although this is not always the case. Being unmarried is a very dangerous situation to find yourself in, we can take reference from Hosea of whom the Lord instructed to go and marry so his wife will not
  • 7. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 7 be unfaithful, I see Hosea at this point being engaged and God instructing him to marry at once so he can edify his wife. We see this happening today, were we get engaged for too long, let this be a reminder for us to save when we start working so we don’t get engaged for too long. So far we have investigated reasons not to stay single, but if we look at the story of Philip on the book of Acts 21 vs. 9, we see that he had 4 unmarried daughters who prophesised, which shows us that God can still show great favour in your life even if you remain single. The book of 1st Corinthians chapter 7 from vs. 1 throughout to vs. 40 gives us great insights on some of the recurring questions we have about marriage, of which Paul was writing to address questions the Corinthians had on Christian life and faith. On vs. 1 Paul takes a different spin on what we have been discussing before and points out how a man does well not to marry, but he then kills this idea correlating it to the many challenges we are faced with as Christians today and he then further says, "because there is too much immorality in the world it is better for every man to have his own wife and every woman her husband", in vs. 8 he further addresses the unmarried and further console them that they can stay single like him only if they will be able to handle living alone. He further reminds them on vs. 26 and 27 on staying single if they can, but Paul then reminds us that staying single must not just be for the sake of it and we read this in vs. 32. However but if you choose to do so make sure that you concern yourself with the Lord's work in hope that you do it to please God in both body and spirit (Chapter, 34). When we read this verse we see immediately that if you chose to remain single make sure you remain faithful to God by giving your body and soul to God, 100%, anything other than that it means you cannot hold yourself therefore you must marry in order for you to be concerned with pleasing your husband, again Paul reminds the Corinthians in vs. 38 that if you can stay single you do well. Paul closes of his respond by saying this is his opinion, but I would believe that Paul's opinion is worthwhile noting because he had the Holy Spirit in him as every man who has writing the word of God did.
  • 8. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 8 It is not God's intention for us to stay single if you cannot handle yourself in doing so, being unmarried can and might bring you shame in the future, so when you do find your rightful partner make sure you marry in time to eliminate sin, at some point in time you will need to leave mommy and daddy and join together with your wife and husband, and at the same time you can stay single if you want to, but remember this comes with great responsibility and you need to then give your body to God, if you cannot do this, please marry.
  • 9. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 9 So let's take it now you decide you want to marry and you have prayed to God who then because he is faithful sends forth your missing rib and you start dating in a Godly manner, what can we learn from the Bible in this difficult stage of our relationship value chain? Exodus 22 vs. 16 to 17 emphasises how if you sleep with a virgin who is not engaged you need to marry her, and pay for her the virgin price, this is relevant for us who might have made mistakes when we are single and committed sin. On a more positive note: well firstly congratulations for finding your missing rib, the book of wisdom, Proverbs chapter 18 vs. 22 reassures us that when you find a wife you find a good thing and it shows that the Lord is good to you. This should really assure those who fear getting married and feel that marriage will be the end of them, we often think like that as young people, but please be reassured that God has been good to you by giving you your wife so make sure you take care of her, and she of him. God's goodness can be further explained in Jeremiah chapter 16 vs. 2, God spoke to Jeremiah and said, do not marry or have children in a place like this. So we need to wait for God and allow him to direct us in our path to marriage. We can see more evidence of how God is involved in our path to marriage further on Luke 1 vs. 27 when the angel spoke about a young women who was promised in marriage to Joseph, this repatriates that God already knows who we are going to be married to even before we do so, hence the importance of asking God to send your partner when you are ready to do marry. Again Paul educates us further about the road to marriage in his letter in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 2 all the way to 38. In vs. 36 he reminds us of those who are engaged, he states: in the case of an engaged couple who have decided not to marry and if the man feels that he is not acting properly towards the young woman and if his passions are too strong and he feels they ought to marry then they should get married as he wants to, there is no sin in this. On the other hand in vs. 37 Paul says, but if a man without being forced to do so, has firmly made up his mind not to marry and if he has his will under complete control and has already decided to his own mind what to do, then he does well
  • 10. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 10 not to marry the young woman, let us also remember however that this might as well apply to a woman who then decided when she is engaged she doesn’t want to marry anymore. So in these two cases if the man marries he does well but if he also does not marry he does even better. Engagement does not mean marriage, if any of you decide you want to go your separate ways then do so, there is no sin in this, rather now than filing for divorce when married. What do we learn from this? use this period to know each other and gauge if you will make each other happy and make the marriage which is the next step work, if you see that things are not working well , split, go your separate ways, Paul reminds us that there is no sin in this so don’t be afraid.
  • 11. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 11 For those who made it through this stage with their partners, congratulations again, for those who didn't and remain single remember what the lord expects of you when you are single, give your body to God and do not sin and wait patiently for the Lord in prayer and fasting. Let's dig deeper and see what the Bible has to share with us in terms of marriage. I am under the assumption that we all know the importance of marriage and its resemblance in the kingdom of God. Marriage is a forever situation till death do you part. So make sure you know what you are getting into and not let excitement carry you into what you are not ready for. This is serious business. The book of Deuteronomy reminds us as man not to desire another man's wife, we see how this act is punishable by death in Job 31 vs. 9 to 11. Numbers 30 vs. 10 also reminds us that, if a woman decides to take a vow to abstain from something she must be true to her vow, unless if the husband objects. Now let's refer back to the book of wisdom, Proverbs 5 vs. 15 to 22 where Solomon son of David reminds us to be faithful to our wives as man and give our love to them alone, because if you go and have children by other women than your wife those children will do you no good, so be happy with your wife and find your joy with the woman your married, pretty and graceful as a deer, let her charms keep you happy let her surround you with her love, why should you give your love to another woman, why should you prefer charms for another man's wife? Have some self control before you bring death to yourself. For those who do not like following God's instructions concerning marriage remember what Solomon says to us in Proverbs chapter 6 vs. 24 to 35: instructions can keep you away from bad women he says, don’t be tempted by her beauty and be trapped by her flirting eyes, a man can hire a prostitute for a price equal to a loaf of bread, but adultery will, not can, but will cost him all he has. Think about it, those who go through divorce because they cheated are often left with nothing after the court cases
  • 12. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 12 just as the Bible has warned us that adultery will leave us with nothing. Be careful you have been warned. It is just as dangerous to sleep with another man's wife, whoever does so will suffer. A man who commits adultery has not any sense, he is just destroying himself, he will be dishonoured and beaten up and he will be permanently disgraced. A husband is never angrier than when he is jealous, his revenge knows no limit, he will not accept any payment, and no amount of gifts will satisfy his anger. I always would ask myself what is adultery really, adultery is when a married man sleeps with another man's wife, fornication however is when a man sleeps with an unmarried women. Stay away from both, the Bible warns us of a husband's furry and jealousy. Now one can ask how do I stay away from such activities, well let's refer to Proverbs 7 vs. 4 to 5: treat wisdom as your sister, and insights as your closest friend, they will keep you away from other men's wives and women of seductive words. But where and how do I get wisdom, I would ask myself again? well that's simple, James 1 vs. 5 instructs us that if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault and it will be given to you. Now concerning these seductive women whom man are always prompt to falling for, the Bible warns us not let such women win our hearts and that we shouldn’t go wandering after them, they have been the ruin of many men and caused the death of too many to count as proverbs 7 vs. 25 to 26 informs us. Now the Bible has given a lot of warning directed to men. Young women, please note what proverbs 21 vs. 19 reminds us of, better to live out in the desert than with a nagging complaining wife. Young men please do not let the devil deceive you into using this as an excuse in committing adultery. For remember the words in James 1 vs. 13 which says, when tempted, no one should say, God is tempting me, for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone. This is merely a reminder to wives to be considerate and not nag your husband, this is further supported in Proverbs 27 vs. 15 to 16, a nagging wife is like water going drip drip on a rainy day, how can you keep her quite? Have you tried to stop the wind or ever tried to hold a handful of oil?
  • 13. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 13 Now men please take caution on a cheating wife, I hear people always saying that women are good in hiding their adultery ways than men, well that's a debate for another day, however proverbs had already warned us about the cheating wife, it says in Proverbs 30 vs. 20: this is how an unfaithful wife commits acts, she commits adultery, has a bath and says but I haven’t done anything wrong. So for women let us remember Proverbs 30 vs. 21 which remind us of the thing the earth itself hates, in which one of the things include a hateful woman who gets married and a servant woman who takes the place of her mistress. Adultery does not only affect the soul but the Bible shows us the practicality of how it destroys our lives in a financial manner as well, we see this in Proverbs chapter 31 vs. 3: don’t spend all your energy on sex and all your money on women, they have destroyed kings (kings who were rich and had everything, so what damage will these acts do to you?). These type of woman are further analysed in chapter 7 vs. 26 Now I know most of us are probably thinking by now how horrible women are right, well proverbs 31 vs. 10 to 31shows us of the power of a good capable woman. How she is worth more than jewels, her husband puts confidence in her, as long as she lives she does him good and never harm, she keeps herself busy with work, and makes food for her family of which she gets up early and prepares for her family, she is a hard worker and works hard, she is generous to the poor and not afraid of the future, so there are a lot of good wives in the world. Man let us love our wives, wives let us also love our husbands. Now, like everything else in the world let us also remember that there is a time for everything even in marriage. Ezekiel 18 vs. 5 warns us about having intercourse with our wives when on their periods, it is unclean. But let's not take intimacy for granted in marriage, we see that intimacy is important in marriage but you can however agree between the two of you to take a break from it for prayer, we see this in 1st Corinthians 7 vs. 5. Now we also know about this concept of giving your husband or wife a "passport" to go somewhere right, well for those with married friends please respect their marriage
  • 14. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 14 especially if it's a new. Remember the words in Luke 14 vs. 20, I just got married and for that reason I cannot come. So let's respect the space of newlyweds and give them time with one other. Most people also bring up the issue of getting married to an unbeliever, especially in the times we live in today, where not a lot of people believe in God, I have heard many people saying they believe in the "higher power", this could mean anything, but that’s a write up for another day, well going back to getting married to unbelievers, the Bible tells us that there is nothing wrong with doing so, we see this in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 14, where marrying an unbeliever actually makes them acceptable in front of God by being united as one with their partner. Remember how we have discussed the importance of Marriage above, well when you look at 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 39, it clearly shows us how Marriage is a long life commitment separated by death. This is further supported in Hebrews 13 vs. 4 where the Bible reminds us that Marriage is to be honoured by all, and husbands and wives must be faithful to each other and how God will judge those who are immoral and commit adultery. Again when we read Revelations 2 vs. 22 we see the main massage of marriage being repatriated again, do not commit adultery and love each other, therefore let's remember that this is a life time commitment.
  • 15. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 15 Well unfortunately every marriage has its own challenges right? So then what happens when someone cheats on you, and you want to divorce, can you divorce? Or do you solute and continue with your marriage? Let's consult God's word and see: As Christians and if it has nothing to do with adultery we need to try and solute the marriage, the Bible in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 27 says: have you got a wife? then don’t try to get rid of her, Ephesians 4 vs. 26 also advices us that if you become angry, do not let your anger lead you into sin and do not stay angry all day, so make sure you solve your issues before you go to sleep, remember you are now one thing with your partner. We also see in vs. 31 to 32, that we should get rid of all bitterness, passion and anger. No more shouting or insults, no more hateful feelings of any sort. Instead, be kind and tender hearted to one another and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ. Let's also take a look at some divorce teachings from the Bible. Leviticus 21 vs.14 reminds us especially man not to marry divorced women, we also see this again in Jeremiah 3 vs. 1, which states, if a man divorces his wife and she leaves him and becomes another man's wife, he cannot take her back again. In Luke 16 vs. 18, it also states if any man who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery and the man who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery. 1st Corinthians 7 vs. 10 to 11 also warns the wife that she may not leave her husband but if she does, she must remain single or else be reconciled to her husband and a husband must not divorce his wife. vs. 12, 13 to 15 also reminds us that if an unbelieving woman decides to stay with her husband he must not divorce her, however if the unbeliever is the one who leaves the Christian wife or husband then the believing partner is free to act. So remember if you divorce and remarry you commit adultery
  • 16. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 16 What about those who have families, what does the Bible advice us on what the role of a man should be and what the role of a wife and kids should be? A man should fulfil his duty as a husband, and a woman should fulfil her duty as a wife, and each should satisfy the other's needs. Submit yourself to one another because of your reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5 vs. 21) 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 3 again reminds us that a husband must fulfil his duty and a wife must also do the same in marriage, husbands are also to love their wives as Christ loved the church we see this in Ephesians 5 vs. 25, vs. 28 also tells us that men ought to love their wives just as they love their own bodies. A man who loves his wife loves himself. Husbands must love their wives and not be harsh to them, we see this in Colossians 3 vs. 19, 1st Thessalonians 4 vs. 4 also reminds us as husbands that we must learn to live with our wives. The Bible also has lessons for those who are moving into ministry and fulfilling the calling of God, we read in 1st Timothy chapter 3 vs. 1 to 7: this is a true saying: if a man is eager to be a church leader, he desires an excellent work. A church leader must be without fault, he must have only one wife, vs. 4 further states that a man of God must be able to manage his own family well and make his children obey him with respect, for if a man does not know how to manage his own family how can he take care of the church. So let us remember as husbands to live with our wives with the proper understanding that they are weaker than us. Treat them with respect, because they also will receive, together with you, God's gift of life. Do this so that nothing will interfere with your prayers Now, the Bible reminds us in Proverbs 12 vs. 4 that a good wife is her husbands' pride and joy, but a wife who brings shame on her husband is like cancer in his bones. Proverbs 14 vs. 1 also shows us how homes are made by the wisdom of women, but destroyed by foolishness. Earlier on we discussed how marriage is a life time commitment, woman are also reminded about this in Romans 7 vs. 2, a
  • 17. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 17 married woman is bound by law to her husband as long as the husbands lives, this is further supported in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 vs. 10: A wife is not the master of her own body, but her husband is, same applies for the men (1st Corinthians 7 vs. 4), vs. 10 also re-emphasis how a wife must not leave her husband and how a Christian wife must submit to her husband as Christians do, we are further reminded of this in Colossians 3 vs.18. Wives must not gossip, they must be of good character and must be sober and honest in everything, we are reminded of this in the character of a wife who is also a helper at the church. Titus 3 vs. 3 to 5, reminds the older women who are servants in the church and are also wives that, they should behave as women who live a wholly life, they must not be slanders or slaves to wine. They must teach what is good in order to train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self controlled and pure and to be good housewives who submit to their husbands so that no one will speak evil of the message that comes from God. For the women let me conclude with 1st Peter 3 vs. 1 to 5: you should not use outward aids to make yourselves beautiful, such as the way you do your hair, or the jewellery you put on, or the dress you wear. Instead your beauty should consist of your true inner self, the ageless beauty of a gentle and quite spirit, which if of the greatest value in God's sight. Marriage is a 2 way street, hence the Bible also gives us guidance as man on how we should live with our wives and also how we should raise our families as the head of the house. The role of a husband is a very crucial one in family building, let us remember God's words in 1st Corinthians 11 vs. 9: and man was not made for woman, but woman was made for man. If you look at it from vs. 18 it says for man did not come from woman, but woman from man. The reason I mention these 2 verses is to repatriate the importance of the husband in society as a whole especially in relation to his wife. There are many scriptures in the Bible that give us guidance on how to act as husbands, below I have selected some to help us realise this role. The book of Ecclesiastes 9 vs. 9 tells us as husbands to
  • 18. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 18 enjoy life with the woman you love, as long as you live the useless life that God has given you in this world. Enjoy every useless day of it because that is all you will get for all your trouble. 1st Corinthians reminds us that a man should fulfil his duties just a s a wife should and we should love our wives just as Christ loved the church, we see this in Ephesians 5 vs. 25, vs. 28 further reminds us a s man that if we love our wives we also love our selves. This is again re-emphasised in 1 Thessalonians 4 vs. 4. For us as Christian man it is important to remember 1st Timothy 3 vs. 1 to 7, which reminds us how a Christian man can best live with his wife the way God intends leaders in Christ within the church and outside to do so. The Bible also gives us guidance not only as women and husbands but it also gives us guidance on how we as a couple should and can raise our kids. We take a look at this by studying the role Kids should take within the family in behaviour. The book of proverbs tells us how kids should behave. The main message on the role of kids is shown in 1 Peter 5 vs. 5, that young people should submit to the elders and also that as young people we should have self control as Titus 2 vs. 6 suggests we do. Colossians 3 vs. 20 reminds us that it is our Christian duty to obey our parents as that is what pleases God. In this spirit let us also remember the words in Deuteronomy 5 vs. 16 which says, honour your mother and father that you may live long, the importance of this command is further supported in Ephesians chapter 6 vs. 2. The book of wisdom, Proverbs, elaborates further on how as young people we should live with our parents and also gives us guidelines on how we should behave ourselves in society. Let's take a look at Proverbs chapter 1 vs. 8 which reminds us to pay attention to what our mother and father tells us to do, this is also further supported in 4 vs.1, we see this re-addressed again in chapter 13 vs.1. Let us remember as young people to take care of our parents in their old age, just as proverbs 23 vs. 25 instructs us to do so. Listen to your father, without him you wouldn’t exist. When your mother is old, show her your appreciation, this is further supported in chapter 30 vs. 17.
  • 19. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 19 The main message we can take as young people is shown in Ecclesiastics chapter 11 vs. 9 to 10: young people enjoy your youth. Be happy while you are still young. Do what you want to do and follow your heart's desire. But remember that God is going to judge you for whatever you do. Don't let anything worry you or cause you pain. You are not going to be young forever. In all you do, always remember Proverbs 10 vs. 1: wise children make their father proud but foolish ones bring their mothers grief, we see the same message again in chapter 15 vs.20 I hope this has given you some insights you can apply to your daily life as it has for me. Let us remember that the Bible can be a good tool in navigating us through different life scenarios we may experience. I hope after reading this text you will be motivated to keep reading the Bible everyday and meditate on it day and night, don’t let it depart from your mouth and always make sure you use it as spiritual weapon in every situation, and remember the confidence to have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us whatever we ask we know that we have what we asked of him.
  • 20. Jabrasce' Journal 4 Christian Youth (JJ4CY): Volume 1, No. 1 (2016) 20 God loves you, seek wisdom so you may not be misguided Available at: www.jabrasce.com