The speaker discusses their experience donating the organs and tissues of their brother Todd after he unexpectedly passed away at age 43. When approached by the South Dakota LyonsEye & Tissue Bank about donation, the speaker was hesitant given Todd's medical conditions. However, they agreed to donation after learning that despite his health issues, some of his organs and tissues could still help others. The donation process caused the speaker to feel responsible and worry they made the wrong choice, as Todd's body was in poor condition after donation. However, the speaker believes that allowing Todd to donate was the right decision, as it allowed him to extend others' lives even after his death, which they find miraculous.

1. Thank your for inviting me to speak today. The South Dakota LyonsEye &
Tissue Bank was a name that I had never spoken until September 7, 2013.
That was a day that my life changed and normal would never return.
WhenI was 19-years-old, I had the honor and privilege of becoming my
brother’slegal guardian and held thistitle for 24 years. He was my
parent’sfirst of 7 childrenand was bornwith mental retardation; I came
along at number 6. WhenI was 19, the state of South Dakota relinquished
all guardianships, and it was a comforting choice for my parentsto allow
me to take over hiscare since I was pursuing my degree inspecial
education. Todd isthe reasonI am who I am. He wasa man who loved big
with few words. Todd lived inthe era of inadequate and deplorable state
hospitals, ill equipped foster care homesand just plainsubstandard care;
however, I waseventually able to move himto my community where he
could enjoy all thingsand live the way that youand I do. He was supposed
to go to the football game with me onFriday September 6th; however, his
staff called to say he had the flu. I decided to go see him after workto tell
him we would go to the football game next Friday, but onautopilot,I
drove home. My initial thought was wait and go see him on Saturday,
since I was already home, but instead, backed out of my driveway, and
drove to hishouse. After our visit, I kissed him onthe forehead, rubbed his
head, said I love you, and said what I alwayssay, “See ya next time.” The
next morning at 7:30, I got a phone call that is etched permanentlyinmy
memory. After I raced to hishouse, thento the emergency room, I watched
the paramedicsworkonhim, knowing he was gone, but hung on to every
chest compressionand breath they gave. When the doctor finally came
out to tell me they did everything they could, I truly felt a piece of me die
also. As we become older, we start to realizeour ownmortality; we
prepare for worse case scenarioswith our spouses, parents, and children,
not that thisever minimizesa death; but eventhe mere though of losing
Todd had just never evencrossed my mind. He was so interwoveninto my
life as my brother and my child. When the nurse told me that the South
Dakota LyonsEye and Tissue Bank wanted to speakwith me about
donating, I was quick to say that I wascertainthat Todd would not have
anything to offer. Whenthey asked about hiscorneas, I replied that he
had a degenerative eye disease and waslegally blind. Surely they did not
want those, but they did. Whenthey mentioned donating veinsand
tissues, I told themthat he has had an arsenal of medication coursing
through hisbody his entire life and they would not want those, but they
did. When they asked about donating hisbones, I told themthat he once

2. had osteomyelitisinhis femur and would not want his bones, but they did.
I finally did agree after learning that despitehisdamaged body, he could
still offer life insome formto others. I wasunprepared for the multitude of
emotionsI would feel afterwards. I could not disconnect Todd fromhis
body, eventhough I knew he wasn’t here in the physical form. I wondered
if they were treating himwith care, if they were being gentle with him, if
they were talking to himand telling him what they were doing and why.
He had 24 hour care for his entire life and this would be the first night he
would be alone. Whenmeeting with the funeral director and learning that
we would have to change our planfor his clothing due to the conditionof
his body after donating, I felt so responsible and worried that I had made
the wrong decision, knowing thiswas my decision, not Todd’s. I share this
with you, not in any way to discourage youfrombeing a donor. I am a
donor, my husband is a donor, my daughter is a donor, and my son will be
when he is of age. There is just so much more to being a donor than
marking it on your driver’slicense. Patty, so graciously, hascontinued to
check in with me, provide me with resources, and remind me she is just a
phone call away. So, if I had to do it all over again, would I allow Todd to
be a donor? The answer is yes. The fact that we can offer a gift to extend
someone’slife, make their life better, or further life saving research when
our time on earth is over, and Todd got to be a part of that, is nothing
short of miraculous.
Thank youfor listening.