Father of the Bride speech The wedding of Nosky & Douglas 19 April 2022

1. FATHER OF THE BRIDE SPEECH – JAMES CAMPBELL
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Good afternoon. What a great honour it is to be here to witness the union
of these two young and very special people and even more so, to be
asked to give a speech at this most auspicious occasion. My name is
James Campbell, and I am the father of this most beautiful bride.
Lochani mandebele, Niguphi?
There is a quote that goes “Family is not defined by our genes, it is built
and maintained through love.” And this is very much the case here.
Although not defined by genetics, Nosky and by extension, Douglas; have
been a part of our family for many years.
Nosky was very young when she joined our family and I have had the
privilege to watch her grow into the lovely young lady you see before you
here today.
When she first came to stay with us, the only English word she was able to
say was “yes”. Ann’s mother, the late Ouma Trudie who was an ex-
teacher, assisted here and now, fast forward to today, she has absolutely
no problem with studying, working, and expressing herself amongst some
very strong personalities in multiple languages.
It is not just in language where Nosky shows her intelligence, she has also
grown to be a financially astute young lady. She never abuses credit and
knows how to use money wisely. Nosky, I hope you take these skills with
you as you embark on your new journey with Douglas.
From her primary school years at Irene Primary, to her graduation from
university to her becoming a practising lawyer, it has been an honour to
witness each of Nosky’s milestones. And now, Nosky, your marriage is
another milestone in life’s journey.

2. FATHER OF THE BRIDE SPEECH – JAMES CAMPBELL
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Each of these milestones comes with it consistent hard work, responsibility
and ultimately, hoped for success and happiness. And that is no different
here today. Your marriage will also require consistent hard work and
responsibility. But the good news, is that it is no longer just your consistent
work, responsibility and in turn happiness that counts. You have a partner
to share both the load and joy.
A partner to help with the day-to-day work that a marriage needs. From
doing the cooking, to the washing up and to managing the finances.
Douglas, I now turn my attention to you.
Douglas has been a part of Nosky’s world since university, but we really
got to know him during the Covid Pandemic lockdown where he joined the
residents of 9 Lotus Lane in Irene. It took him a while to get comfortable
around all of us but after several family braais, he was very much part of
the family and got stuck into many a good debate around the meal table.
Douglas, I welcome you, officially, to the family. I’ll leave most of the
guidelines to the sisters, but I have just one piece of advice for your
survival, please learn the phrase “yes dear”.
I believe you will be thoughtful and caring because I believe Nosky has
chosen wisely. I've been in this marriage thing for a while now, and I know
the hard work it is. I know the burden a man has: to provide, to love and
lead his family. It is no easy nor simple matter. But, again, the good news
here is that you are not alone in this endeavour, you have a strong partner
in the form of your wife by your side. Always remember this.
Marriage is a partnership, the joining of two hearts, minds and indeed,
lives. Here it is the also the integration of multiple cultures, to name but a
few: Irish, Scottish and English (myself), Afrikaans and Welsh (Ann),
Ndebele and now Sepedi. Embrace all of these. There are wonderful

3. FATHER OF THE BRIDE SPEECH – JAMES CAMPBELL
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lessons that can be learnt from each of them. I, myself arrived in this
country and joined a new family with a new culture and have learnt that
even though different, some pieces of advice run across culture lines so
here are a few from me:
• Learn to attack problems, not each other.
• Celebrate every win as a couple, no matter how big or small!
• Inspire each other to be better daily.
• Always make time for each other: do things together.
• Don’t take life too seriously.
• Create your own traditions.
• Always say “I love you.”
• Never let the sun go down on an argument.
• And lastly, never laugh at your spouse’s choices. You are one of
them.
My father would remind me that this advice is even better encapsulated in 1
Corinthians 13 4-7
: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not
boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is
not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in
evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
always perseveres.”
There is one other quote I would like you to consider as you start and develop
your married life. It is a quote I hold most dear and something which I try and
live my life by. It is by John Bradford, a mid-sixteenth century preacher in
England and it is most relevant to where we collectively find ourselves in
South Africa and it goes: “there by the grace of God go I”. Essentially, this
means be grateful for what you have and give back to society and others less
fortunate than you in a meaningful way.

4. FATHER OF THE BRIDE SPEECH – JAMES CAMPBELL
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Nosky and Douglas, the world, not just South Africa, is at your feet, and it is
only you who will determine its rules. I am sure that you will build a loving
home, a safe haven where you’ll feel at ease, which will give you strength to
withstand the storms and challenges of life ahead. On this journey, let me
wish you, only love and good fortune.
Ladies and Gentlemen, please will you join me, as it is my privilege to
propose a toast to the happy couple and I’ll do this by way of three blessings
from three of our shared cultures:
First, an Irish blessing: “May you live as long as you want and never want as
long as you live. May you know nothing but happiness from this day forward.
May there be a generation of children on the children of your children. May
you live all the days of your life."
Second, an Ndebele blessing: Inkosi ilibusise. Ihlalelani ililondoloze lize
likhokhobe. iliqinise enasathandweni, iligcine izintweni zonke ezinhle. Ibusise
izingane zenu lemisebenzi yenu lakho konke enikobamba ngezandla zenu
(The Lord Bless and keep you all the days of your life. May He strengthen
you with love and give you all good things. May He grant you the desires of
your heart. God bless your children, your good deeds and all that you touch
with your hands).
And finally, an English blessing: “Here’s to the past, for all that you’ve
learned. Here’s to the present, for all that you share. Here’s to the future, for
all that you look forward to, together.”
To Nosky and Douglas!