9. EDITING
AFTER Editing – Novel Chapter
Chapter: 1
This day started a bit earlier for me than most. The alarm clock jolted me awake at 2:00
a.m. My still-hazy mind was racing to make sense of why it had been so pressing for me to
actually set my clock last night – and why so early?
Steaming water pelted me in the shower and quickly rinsed away the fog from my brain.
Surveillance. Yes, today it’s surveillance. Sometimes, in the mornings, it takes me a while to
realize that I no longer serve on the police force. Thanks to a lower back injury, two painful
surgeries, and a lot of titanium mixed in with my own flesh and bones, I’m now off the
force and living the glamorous life of a private detective. This morning, the glamor involves
driving 3 ½ hours due north and spying on a claimant who has been cashing insurance
checks for the last eight years.
I find that it’s better if I use the word ‘claimant’, rather than, say, dickhead. It’s a healthy
reminder that these are simply people who have filed a claim with the insurance company.
All of them are innocent… that is, until I photograph one of them playing golf or stunt-
driving a Mustang through the streets of Detroit or any one of the other crazy things I’ve
witnessed these ‘disabled’ people doing. I try not to prejudge; and on occasion, I actually
get to report that someone is honestly navigating through life from a wheelchair and
deserves the insurance payout. But I like it better when I can save the company thousands
by exposing an insurance cheat. The former employer of this claimant needs to know one
way or another about this particular case.
The claimant was involved in an automobile accident and has been quietly collecting
$50,000 a year ever since. However, the red flags have been popping up everywhere of
late: he was required to report to a new doctor four months ago – this time, it was to a
company-appointed doctor. But, according to the doctor’s office, he never showed up and
seems to have conveniently changed his phone number.
The file sits on the counter next to my steeping mug of tea. It’s a very thin one today.
Just a name, age (no birthdate), a P.O. Box, and the old non-working phone number to go
on. The rest I have to figure out for myself. The injury date is from eight years ago; that’s
sometimes a problem because the claimants from older cases are much more conscious of
being caught. But I know just how to handle these types of cases.
It’s really no more than a hunting expedition. I’ve hunted whitetail deer practically my
whole life. It takes patience, focus, and a certain amount of dedication to track a deer
through the woods…and it’s no different with tracking people. I have learned to make life
and death decisions in the blink of an eye, to keep calm when faced with danger, to stay
focused on my singular task, and most of all, to know where I want to end up before I even
begin. Detective work? Hunting? The lines get blurred when looking at the skills it takes for
success in either of these activities.
I really have to get moving now. By 6:00 am, I need to be in Traverse City – alert, sharp,
and ready for untold hours of sitting in my car. So, I load up my lunch bag, actually my son’s
rejected Avengers lunch tote, with the usual -- tuna fish on wheat, apple, carrots, and a jug
of water. At the last second, I also grab a large bag of pistachios, which strikes me as a
fitting choice for today as I anticipate long hours spent fidgeting in the car. It’s times like
these, as I’m walking out to my car with a flowered mug of tea and bright red Avengers
lunch tote, that I pray that I’m not the one under surveillance.
Once I slam my car door shut, that feeling takes over, just like it always does. Everything
feels right. That surge of exhilaration always kicks in when I’m sitting behind the wheel
with a full tank of gas, spotless windows, and a carefully thought out plan of action. Little
did I know, this would turn out to be a day that I wouldn’t soon forget.
BEFORE Editing– Novel Chapter
Chapter: 1
It is a beautiful, cool, crisp, late fall morning in the Midwestern part of
the United States. This day starts for me a bit earlier than most days
start. The alarm clock rings and shows it's 2:00 a.m.
It’s very early and I have a 3 ½ hr drive and a 6:00 a.m. start time in a
town that’s 225 miles away. This makes for a very long day, and what
will end up being a day I will never forget.
I make a large cup of hot tea to-go and a tuna fish sandwich for the road.
As a private investigator, I have a fitting surveillance vehicle -- a small
sedan with very dark windows. It is filled with fuel and the windows are
clean. I have to constantly clean the windows to allow the camera to
see through the glass. If there are bugs or other stuff on the glass, the
camera will not focus on the target, but instead on the glass. So it’s very
important to have clean windows.
I drive off out of my driveway not knowing much about the case I am
working today.
As I drive, I begin to formulate a plan on the informational sheet given to
me by my customer. Some case sheets have lots of detail and
information on them. Other case sheets barely have the name of the
claimant and his or her age. This case has little information other than a
name, age, and an address. There is a date of injury, which appears to
be eight years ago. This is significant because the older the case, the
more conscious the claimant becomes of surveillance.
By the way, the word claimant means just that; the person has made an
injury claim against an insurance provider. Most claims arise out of a
workers compensation injury or an auto crash, while some arise out of
slip and fall accidents. Most of the time I don’t know the circumstance
surrounding the injury, which is good because I feel it makes me less
likely to take sides on the case. I try to be fair and honest in all aspects of
the investigation. If a person is truly injured, my report and video will
reflect that in a fair and balanced manner. I write what I see, no more no
less.
Usually, by the time an insurance company contacts me there is a reason
for it. Red flags have been going off in the company’s computer because
of the claimant’s behavior or hostile attitude. The most common issue is
that the claimant does not want to go back to work even when the
employer makes concessions to help him or her. Many times the doctors
find no sign of any injury and cannot explain why the person is in such
pain. The case today is a person involved in an auto accident.
10. EDITING
AFTER- Cover Letter
Dear Principal (name)
As a teacher certified in Elementary Education with a Middle
School Option, I can offer a full range of possibilities for (insert
school name).
Prior to finishing my LBS1 Endorsement at Lewis University this
summer, I worked as a long-term substitute teacher at Saint
Michael School, where I taught 3rd/4th grade. My additional
experience as a Saturday Enrichment Program Instructor and
Sylvan Learning Center Instructor have allowed me to apply my
skills in motivating various learners, implementing classroom
management procedures, and creating engaging lesson plans for
students from kindergarten through sixth grade. I was also very
involved in extracurricular activities, such as coaching 7th grade
volleyball, which I would like to continue doing.
I consider these diverse experiences, along with my education at
Eastern Illinois University (Bachelor of Science in Education:
English concentration with Science and Social Science
endorsements) to be valuable assets. However, it’s my passion for
teaching that is my greatest asset. I have learned from my
students that I have much to give and am continuously seeking out
ways to improve their learning experiences.
My objective is to become a full-time member of a school
community where dedicated teachers inspire all learners. I look
forward to talking with you about a position with (insert school
name here) and how I can contribute to the long-term success of
the school.
Sincerely,
BEFORE – Cover Letter
Dear Principal,
I am writing you in regards to obtaining an elementary/middle
school teaching position within your school. The ability to work
with all types of learners has been a positive and rewarding
experience thus far in my teaching career. I am eager to continue
my love for teaching through acquiring a full time teaching
position.
I student taught in a sixth grade language arts and literature
classroom at Century Junior High in Orland Park and have received
my Type 03 initial teaching certificate. I am anticipating my LBS1
endorsement this August. During my student teaching experience
at Century Junior High, I have worked with various students’
learning abilities ranging from students with special needs to
gifted students. I would be honored to have the opportunity to
foster my love of teaching diverse learners and continue
motivating students to become life-long learners. By continuing
my love to teach by working at Northwestern University Saturday
Enrichment Program and tutoring at Sylvan Learning Center, I
have realized that teaching is my passion. I have also taught at
Saint Michael School in Orland Park from August to December and
fulfilled many of the roles of a full time teacher. I created
engaging lesson plans that differentiated and accommodated all
learners needs. When the students are excited to learn and are
actively engaged into their lessons, then I feel that I am an
effective teacher.
I would appreciate the opportunity to interview for an opening in
your school. I
would feel honored to be a part the school community and would
enjoy helping diverse learners grow. Thank you for your time and
consideration.
Sincerely,
