2. Outraged, Revolted, Cross, Rageful, and Cranky
It’s hard to keep a level head these days. You turn on the news, start up
your computer browser, or open the newspaper, and there’s plenty to
be angry about. Sometimes, I just get so mad I could spit. I know I’m
not alone in that, either.
Worse, not enough people see just how bad it is. Oh, sure, some little
kid made some big bucks selling lemonade, but how do you think the
guy down the street who paid a dollar for bad lemonade feels, huh?
As bad as everything is nowadays, it’s about time we had a voice letting
the people know just what they’re in for. Now, I’m no doomsday
prophet, but I know a bad thing when I see it, so tune in to keep with
the latest bad news.
3. I’m Cranky
It doesn’t matter where you look—there’s always something to be mad
about. Oh, sure, I can hear you already. “Isn’t it nice to be nice?
Wouldn’t you feel better to look on the bright side every once in a
while?” To that, I say, “Get off my lawn.”
Sure, it’s easier to be happier. I already know it takes more muscles to
frown than it does to smile, but hey, maybe I’m trying to get my
workouts in. Ever thought about that?
4. I’m Revolted
Look, I just want to make sure all you people out there get the full
story. Sure, the news likes to spin cutesy little stories about cats
rescued from trees, but sometimes, maybe those cats were up there
because they wouldn’t stop getting into my trash can and Steven down
the street just had to make a fuss to make me look bad.
It’s shameful, really. You wouldn’t believe how often I’ve had to call my
local police station or lawyers to get all this straightened out. Worse,
people act like I’m the bad guy here! Imagine that, just because I keep
things realistic. Talk about shooting the messenger.
5. I’m Ready to Share My Stories
It seems like everyday, there’s something new to share that’s gone completely sour.
Car accident outside my house, divorcing couple fighting down the street, Steven—
it’s always something, and the world should know about it.
That’s why I’m dedicating my time to informing the masses. The people of the
Internet need to know about all this, and if my so-called neighbors aren’t going to
read the notices I send out, then maybe you fine folks will understand just how bad
it really is out there. I may not be a journalist, but I know a story when I see one.
When something goes wrong, I’m here to share it. I want to see more people
staying informed about how things can go wrong, so they don’t have to worry so
much. Sure, I find myself disappointed, but I’m never surprised.
So, stay informed and stay on top of the news. Check out the stories on my site, so
you know what really can go wrong.