1. Slides will follow automatically. So enjoy our quips & quotes.

2. You are like a miniskirt. If I am not careful, you will creep up my legs

3. Not only did you break my heart and destroy my life, but you spoiled my whole evening.

4. Sorry I'm late, but I got hammered last night

5. I thought about being born again . . . but my mother refused

6. Always remember you are unique . . . just like everyone else

7. Tell me what you need . . . I'll tell you how to get along without it

8. If you two have something to say, raise your hands . . . and place them over your mouths

9. When you're in shit up to your ears . . . keep your mouth shut!

10. Don't know what your problem is . . . but I bet it's hard to pronounce

11. Learn from your parents' mistakes . . . use birth control.

12. Take care of your thoughts my friends. . . they may soon become words.