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商周數位學院
先進觀念 • 輕鬆掌
握
《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
建議最佳閱讀版本: powerpoint 2000
1987年創刊 每周四出刊
「凡事問!」
—— 愛因斯坦
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
轉換問題,改變人生
推動游牧民族逐水草而居的驅力,其實是
一個隱含的問題:「如何弄到水?」
不過,當問題改成:「如何讓水流到我們
這裡?」新的問題就 動了人類最重大的啟
典範轉移,人們不但因此引進了農業,最
後還造就城市文明。
問題好比程式,控制我們的行為和可能的
結果。 得到的結果,是由問題所驅動。你
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
棄舊答案拋
人在陷入困境時,自然會尋找答案和解決
之道。但在這麼做的同時,也可能不智地
製造問題,而非克服障礙。
首先,我們要改變自己的問題,否則就會
週而復始地使用無用的舊答案。
新問題能完全移轉我們的觀點,讓我們用
全新的方式觀察並解決問題。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
自己選擇路徑前進
我們每個人生活中的每一刻,都面臨兩條
路的抉擇:
• 理解者路徑
• 批判者路徑
無論選擇 條路,都是從問題開始。哪
抱著批判者的心態,遲早要掉入泥沼;至
於理解者的心態,則讓我們發現新的路徑
和可能性,如下頁「選擇地圖」所示。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
心中的「選擇地圖」你
起點
任一時刻影響
我們的每件事
批判者的泥沼
我為何如此失敗?
他們為何如此愚笨?
該怪誰?
我究竟怎麼了?
他們究竟怎麼了?
轉換道
問理解者的問題,
避免落入批判者的泥沼
發生什麼了?
什麼有用?
我想要什麼?
我能學到什麼?
別人在想些什麼?
我要負什麼責任?
些是可能的?哪
我有 些選擇?哪
現在做什麼最好? 理解者
深思熟慮的選擇、
焦點在解決問題、
雙贏關係
批判者:反應
理解者:選擇
批判者
自發式反應、
焦點在責怪、
一輸一贏的關係
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
隨時擁有選擇權你
儘管不可能永遠選擇周遭的事,但我們能
選擇對周遭的事做些什麼。
我們每個人都有當批判者的時候,那是人
之常情。無論是否察覺,我們總在批判者
和理解者的心態間選擇。
選擇地圖不是把人分類,也不是把 個人每
擺進不同的格子裡,而是強有力的工具,
為人生畫出更有效的路徑。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
觀察自己的思維
真正的選擇,是從觀察自己的思維開始。
如果管不了自己的思維,又如何管好別的
事 ?呢
選擇地圖引導我們問更多有生產力的問題
,並做出更明智的選擇。這裡沒有好壞對
錯,只有發生了什麼,以及如何應付。
改變你的問題和思維,選擇地圖讓你進入
中性立場,成為心無城府的觀察員。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
「批判者」 不了自己幫
觀察員的身份,讓我們有機會反省,並專
注在大格局上,否則就等於是自動導航,
跟著程式做出不假思索的反應。
沒有人可以站在批判者的立場上, 助任幫
何人。當雙方都成了批判者,先覺醒的就
佔優勢,他可以選擇成為理解者而掌控全
局, 轉雙方的情勢。扭
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
學習成為「理解者」
無論是否有意識,我們問自己的問題,將使
自己處在理解者或批判者的模式。當我們處
在理解者的模式,將發揮最大效能。
問題不在是否走上批判者之路。每個人總會
不時成為批判者,真正的問題是要不要固執
己見、死不悔改。那才會真正出問題。
問問自己以下的問題,就會知道自己是處在
理解者或批判者的模式。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
理解者 批判者的問題∕
裡不對勁?哪 什麼有用?
要怪誰? 我要負什麼責任?
我如何證明自己是對的? 事實是什麼?
我如何守住自己的地盤? 整件事是什麼情況?
我如何掌控全局? 我有 些選擇?哪
我可能失去什麼? 這有什麼用?
我會因為什麼而受傷害? 我能學到什麼?
何必費事? 什麼是可能的?
批判者 理解者
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
辨認「批判者」的信號
發現自己處在批判者模式的信號很明顯,
只要 得辨認, 的身心會告訴 。懂 你 你
我們跟批判者 上關係的心情和態度,前扯
四名是自以為是、妄自尊大、優越感和防
衛心,再加上讓別人或自己失望的習慣,
這下子肯定灰頭土臉。
察覺到這一點,我們就可以改變問題,得
到很不同的結果。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
切換模式,轉換立場
每當我們自覺處於批判者的模式,我們可
以運用以下 A-B-C-C 選擇程序:
– A. 覺察( Aware )我處在批判者的狀態 ?嗎
– B. 大口呼吸( Breathe )我需要後退一步,停
一下,更客觀地看待這狀況 ?嗎
– C. 好奇心( Curiosity )我擁有一切可能 ?現嗎
在究竟怎麼了?
– C. 選擇( Choose )我有 些選擇?哪
或者你也可以運用下列「改變的 12 大問
題」來幫助自己來轉換成理解者模式。
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
改變的 12 大問題
把這份清單放在手邊,每當你動彈不得,
或想尋求新的替代方案時,可以參考這份
清單。
1. 我想要什麼?
2. 我有 些選擇?哪
3. 我正在做怎樣的假設?
4. 我該對什麼負責?
5. 對於這個 況,我還能怎樣想?狀
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
改變的 12 大問題
6. 對方有什麼想法、感受、需要和慾望?
7. 我遺漏或逃避了什麼?
8. 我能從這個人或 況、從這個錯誤或失狀
敗、從這個成功中學到什麼?
9. 我應該問(我自己和 或別人)∕ 些問題?哪
10. 些行動 驟最合理?哪 步
11. 我如何將這個 況變成雙贏?狀
12. 些是可能的?哪
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
小結:好結果始於好問題
解決問題的最佳方法,是想出更好的問題。
批判者問題使我們陷入負面情緒,理解者問
題則引發好奇心,要我們採取正向、有創意
的行動,關鍵就在於轉換問題。
把轉換問題想成「解救問題」或「修正路線
問題」。轉換問題讓 有機會選擇新方向,你
從批判者的感受或後果解救出來,帶 進入你
理解者的心態,找到更好的結果!
本文摘自商智文化《問得好!換個問題,改變一生》
商業周刊網站,每週四精選當週雜誌精彩文章
商周數位學院,每週二、五,菁華書摘簡報上線
    
歡迎 隨時瀏覽商周網站您
或至商周數位學院下載最新書摘簡報!
我要訂 商業周刊 閱 紙本雜誌訂閱 電子雜誌訂閱
本 案由商業周刊新事業中心製作 歡迎轉寄檔
本文摘自商智文化
《問得好!》
作者:梅若李 亞當斯‧
定價: 220 元
歡迎至商智文化購書

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商周 - 問得好