11. Intervjuer
B : […] Og så vil de alltid gå på kafé
hele tida, og snakke om ting. De kan
Intervjuer snakke i timevis nå, virker det som.
Og jeg vet ikke, av og til tenker jeg
bare sånn, åh, nå må du holde kjeft,
Frank Lande
Frank Lande
ikke sant? Jeg føler ditt, jeg føler
datt. Det driter vel jeg i, jeg har
jo nettopp møtt deg liksom.
A : Ja, også dette med at de vil kose etter
at vi har hatt sex. Hvorfor tror de
at dét er så viktig for oss ? Jeg sover
best når jeg er alene i senga, så når
vi er ferdige foretrekker jeg å snu
F°25 ryggen til og late som om han ikke
engang er der. Men nei da, det kommer
alltid en hånd rundt meg og så legger
han seg helt inntil ryggen min og
kysser meg i nakken eller noe.
B : Det er utrolig vanskelig nå om dagen.
Jeg tviler på at mamma måtte tenke på
slikt. Å hele tida passe på at man ikke
knuser disse mennene, følelsesmessig.
Jeg er sikker på at hvis hun hadde sagt
til pappa at han skulle snu seg og sove,
så kunne han ikke brydd seg mindre.
A : Han lå sikkert allerede andre veien,
så hun trengte sikkert ikke å spørre
engang.
B : Nettopp.
19. Portrait of Álvaro de Campos with issue No. 2 of
Orpheu on his desk. Painted by José de Almada
Negreiros.
2 poems about modernity by Álvaro de Campos
20. Photograph of Michael Ondatje’s family from the 1920s.
13 poems about the family by Michael Ondatje
21. Photograph of a lonely Sonja Åkesson in 1968.
11 poems about loneliness by Sonja Åkesson
41. ONE
STORAGE SPACE
Riding a car gives you the advantage of bringing lots of stuff
you need and don’t need. The fact that you also have passengers
makes trips by car much more sociable than riding alone on a
bike. Can your bicycle bring home a Christmas tree, an Oriental
carpet and a fake Monet print? Forget about removal loads or
shopping at IKEA. And what about transporting items you
don’t want people to see, like your favourite Ming vases, crystal
chandeliers and other valuables?
42. TWO
POWERFUL ENEMIES
You can’t be too careful in choosing your enemies. One of the
worst adversaries you can pick certainly has to be the auto
industry. No one knows how many deaths they are responsible
for, and nobody wants to find out. If you want to stay alive, you
better watch your back or fill it up.
43. THREE
MULTITASKING
When you’re driving, you’re usually doing several things at the
same time — whether it’s smoking, eating, reading the map,
sending text messages, talking to passengers, putting on some
extra lipstick or changing music. All these things are hard to do
on a bike, since you have to keep both hands on the handlebars.
A Sony Walkman with headphones could be of some help, since
most bikes don’t even come with a stereo.
44. FOUR
INJURIES
Bicycle riders collide constantly. And who’s supposed to clean
up the mess? It sure isn’t a bike. Take the old crash and bone
fracture story for instance. Who gives you a lift to the infirmary,
and who drives your broken legs around when you get out? If
you’re still breathing, that is. Since the 1930s more than 44,000
cyclists have been killed in the traffic in the US alone, not to
mention all the babies who will never be born as a result of
bicycle induced sterility.
45. FIVE
SAFETY (SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST)
Cars have a roof, steal girders, airbags and seatbelts. Bicycles
offer nothing but a Styrofoam helmet. The first car crash ever
occurred in New York City in 1896, when a motor vehicle
collided with a bicyclist. The first car crash killed a cyclist, and
still today drivers are at fault in almost 90% of pedestrian and
bicyclist deaths in New York. It’s easy to see who comes out on
top here.
46. SIX
KRAFTWERK’S AUTOBAHN IS A BETTER ALBUM
THAN THEIR TOUR DE FRANCE EFFORT
Music pioneers Kraftwerk changed the face of pop music, much
because their Autobahn from 1974. The 22-minute title track
captures the feeling of driving on the freeway: from the high-
speed concentration of the fast lane, to the monotony of the
long journey. When the band made the official anthem for the
cycling race Tour de France in 1983, it went strait down hill. Two
of the original members, Ralf Hütter and Florian Schneider,
got so hooked on cycling that it became a serious problem.
After several disputes the two percussionists in the band left.
Kraftwerk has never again been able to reach their former
heights.
47. SEVEN
ILLEGAL ACTIVITIES
Bank robbing, hooker pick-ups, drive-by shootings, dope
pushing, people smuggling, getting chased by the law – all are
done more efficiently by car. If you want fast money and a slick
style, you’d better rethink your Grand Theft Biko.
48. EIGHT
MOBILITY
There’s no doubt the car beats the bicycle when it comes to
sufficiency. If you think you can go anywhere on a bike, think
again. Consider your favourite place to spend time: on the
freeway. Bicycles aren’t even allowed there, which puts them in
the same pathetic category as tractors, mopeds and pedestrians.
49. NINE
BETTER TO GET A LOST FRIEND BACK, THAN
LOOSE ONE FOREVER
Most bicycles get stolen, and they never turn up again.
Estimates of the number of bicycles that disappear in
Amsterdam each year run as high as 180,000. That’s in a city
of 740,000 people. A theft may leave your car a bit smashed and
foul-smelling, but you’ll get it back eventually.
50. TEN
SUPPORT THE UNDERDOG
There are about a billion bicycles in the world, twice as many as
automobiles. Be courageous. Don’t follow the crowd.
