Japan Dialogue Journal

SATUR-
SUNDAY
one of the first things
to catch my eye in
tokyo was the diver-
sity of architecture. i
was reminded of my
previous dialogue, four
years ago in spain. it
was my first real time
spent outside of the
US and i was fascinat-
ed by the built envi-
ronment of each city
we visited. unlike the
relatively young archi-
tecture of the relatively
young US, the build-
ings in other countries
can tell stories dating
much further back
than a couple hundred
of years.
the contrast of mod-
ern or brutalist ar-
chitecture next to
buildings with more
traditional styles is
really cool to me. they
tell a story of who was
here and what visions
they’ve had for their
city. what does it say
about this country?
and what of ours?
early days and
walking around

i find it entertaining
how common umbrel-
las are here. now on
a rainy day there’s no
real surprise (beyond
noting how many are
plain or clear and not
adorned with some
cute pattern), but
they’re more common
than i realized to block
the sun. sun safe?
cool. hating tans? far
less cool.
rainy days
there’s not much to
say here other than
how much i’m loving all
the tiles used on the
exterior of buildings.
it’s giving vaporwave,
it’s almost hypnotiz-
ing, and it is so fun.
not pictured: some
really cool colors (red!
green!) and finishes (ir-
idescent glows! matte
next to gloss!)
tile and more tile and the
neverending beauty of
overlapping patterns

fish grilling at a festival
i loved the color and
textures in this. “fes-
tival” food in the us
is usually soft and
doughy, and this
felt like a fresh, tex-
ture-filled alternative.
MONDAY
i liked the contrast
and vibrancy of these
floating leaves at the
tennoji temple. i’m not
sure what plant this is,
but the color was so
bright in the sun and
popped against the
dark water. vistiting
this temple was a great
start to the trip. it was
quiet and peaceful
but also served as a
reminder that we are
visiting a country with
hundreds of years of
tradition and history. i
felt like a stranger, a
tourist, but also felt
calmed.
plants at tennoji temple
MONDAY

where to even start
here...
these were both found
on the same day but
in completely different
locations.
the neutral concrete
background serves as
such a beautiful back-
ground to the bright
pops of red.
then there’s the con-
trast between created
objects vs natural ob-
jects, hard and soft.
and the similarities of
the imperfect and deli-
cate beautiful objects.
i know some people
don’t like concrete
since it’s a “brutal”,
“cold” material, but i fall
into team concrete. i
think it can be a great
contrast to more bright
and “natural” materials.
i also tend to think of
it as a “natural” mate-
rial inn its similarity to
stone and i like how
each pour has its own
flaws and character.
contrast continues

a group of us met up
at the indian restau-
rant near the hostel for
lunch. it was adorned
in decadent decora-
tions and felt like every
corner has something
new to admire.
while we were there,
i was thinking about
how we don’t talk
about or celebrate
south asian art near-
ly enough, at least in
american discussions
of asian art. they have
centuries of detailed,
gorgeous practices
that are present from
lamps to room dividers
to tapestries.
eating here was fun,
but experiencing a
meal where every item
and square inch felt
artistic and decorated
made me reflect on
the items i surround
myself with and levels
of decoration in my life.
as i travel, i planned
to buy more kitchen
items like ceramicware
and utensils.
eating here made me
think about the styles
i tend to gravitate to,
which are usually more
simple in decoration
and tend to be more
interesting in the differ-
ent shapes or textures
they have.
the indian restaurant
TUESDAY

getting to do
calligraphy was
something i was really
looking forward to.
as soon as we started,
i was taken back to
sticky summers in
my grandparents’
apartment, laying
on their couch and
looking at the scrolls
hanging from their
walls. i’d fall asleep
with the thick black
lines of korean
symbols floating in
my eyes. just a sweet,
quiet nostalgia.
calligraphy workshop
the visit to the tokyo
national museum
was a great time to
decompress. there
were so many items
that stood out, but my
favorite were probably
all the pottery.
seeing different glaze
techniques evolve
was super interesting
(iron oxides to blue
porcelain to multiple
colorful enamel layers.
i liked that jamal made
me do my “whys” on
it in class, because i
really do appreciate
the way we have all this
evidence of human
touch and expression
preserved. that
something someone
worked hard to make
beautiful can still be
admired hundreds of
years later.
art museums make
me emotional, it just
leaves me in love
with how human it is
to need to express
ourselves through art.
tokyo national museum

WEDNESDAY
found a windbreaker
set in this iridescent,
bettle-shell colored
fabric and basically
started drooling on the
spot.
i guess a common
theme here is emeging
that rich colors and
textures really catch
my eye. i am truly no
better than a common
crow.
anyway, it was tough
to walk away from this
one with only some
photos that don’t near-
ly capture how cool it
was in person
harajuku shopping

i visited a beauty store
and found they had a
display for a makeup
brand i’d been a long-
time fan of but had
limited access to.
i really love their ap-
proach to makeup,
making futuristic-look-
ing components and
thoughtful design
choices, like this
form-fitting paper out-
er packaging. i picked
up a mascara and ad-
mired its 3-CPO-ness
packaging design
after a couple days
walking around hara-
juku, i’ve been really
enjoying the punk cul-
ture some have here in
tokyo.
it’s interesting to see
amongst the minma-
lism and modest out-
fits, there’s some that
really adopt a maxi-
malist, rebellious style.
layers upon layers,
structured streetwear
and many references
to american hip hop/
punk culture.
this isn’t exactly novel
to me (shoutout the
great blog tokyofash,
which i’ve followed
for a few years). how-
ever, it has made
the people watching
great. in many ways
it symbolizes the
spectrum of japanese
culture— that there’s
this delicate, reserved,
disciplined side and a
wild, youthful, or even
scandalous (ex. red
light district) side too.
how much is a reaction
to the other? i find
myself wishing i could
ask a tokyoite
harajuku shopping continued

THURSDAY
i’ll be honest. it’s been
a busy clump of days
and i’m a bit burnt out.
allergies are kicking
my respiratory sys-
tem’s a$$. class was
cancelled so we spent
time working on as-
signments. we only
really ventured out
for food, which was a
devastating journey
as the unagi place i
had bookmarked was
closed for a holiday i
wasn’t aware of.
for part one of today’s
entry, you get some
pretty photos of flow-
ers i saw as we were
walking around to find
a place to eat in nip-
pori. the purple ones
stood out because i
always send photos of
purple flowers to my
mom. it’s her favorite
color.
don’t get me wrong,
i’m not unhappy to be
here. it’s just that we
all have days lower
than others.
i find myself wanting
more time alone. i
didn’t realize how
much alone time usu-
ally enjoy — i love eat-
ing alone, doing work
alone, etc. not living on
campus and having my
own apartment (with a
reclusive housemate)
means i find a lot of
comfort in time spent
only with myself.
the week drags on

i just liked this photo
i took while walking
around. the nature
here feels more or-
ganic. in the us, many
trees are planted in
a uniform, repetitive
nature to line streets,
whereas here it seems
nature/trees interact
more organically with
the built environment.
i also love the tree
species here, they
can have some really
fun shapes and i feel i
notice more varieties
planted around the city
peace and contrast
today we ate break-
fast at a new cafe,
which used utensils
created by a japanese
designer. harkening
back to tuesday, my
appreciation for in-
teresting home item
design was engaged
here. i thought they
were funky and almost
aquatic looking.
i almost considered
buying one of the
spoons but alas i must
practice restraint
designed tools

FRIDAY
a group of us were
chatting, as we do.
we tried to guess
eachother’s favorite
colors.
henry confidently
declared that mine is
blue. henry is wrong.
it’s green.
maybe you can tell
already. there’s
something thrilling
about green. it can
feel warm, like a color
that you want to be
consimed by. or it can
be a vibrant flash of
life. or maybe that’s
how we all feel about
our favorite colors.
favorite colors
favorite colors

i felt very small walking
through the meiji
jingu forest, a feeling
i always enjoy. it was
a great reminder of
how impactful green
spaces can be and
how great nature
is (in both size and
emotional impact).
it also left me in awe of
what 100 years means.
100 years ago, roughly,
100,000 trees were
selected, donated, and
planted. now they feel
as though the space
could’ve existed far
before only a couple
generations.
the trees were
beautiful. but it
was uncanny in a
way. prerecorded
announcements
and constant planes
flying overhead. if it
felt like for a moment
you might be able to
lose yourself to your
surroundings, there
was always a loud
reminder around the
corner that you were
in fact standing in a
constructed space
inside a huge city.
it was refreshing and
pretty and sad and
inspiring all at once
a visit to meiji jingu
ends of wood beams
painted white to con-
trast the dark wood,
metal pieces in intri-
cate designs, gold
hardware on a handrail.
the wood was calming,
humble even, but then
there were these small
details indicating this
as a place made with
devotion.
old catholic churches
can be gorgeous, but
almost overwhelming
in the decadence of
their adornment.
here, the open space
and public forest and
“humble” wood felt
more earnest. like it
was meant for peo-
ple and not for a god
(which makes sense
given the differences
in religions).
the wood of the torii
bowed in the same
way roman columns
do and we wondered
if stone columns were
made to mimic wood.
perfect little details...

SATURDAY
continued appreciation
for handmade things
it might seem
repetitive, but strap in
i suppose since we’re
going to have four
more weeks of me
trying to wax poetic
about the things i see
and like, which remain
largely consistent.
i love these little
spoons. i’ve seen
them in several stalls
and stores now and it
remains a challenge to
decide which variety i
should buy a couple of.
handmade, human-
touch adjacent
items are just lovely.
they feel warm and
nostalgic and a
handmade bowl or
spoon is simply an
extension of being fed
by someone else. it’s
loving and it’s beautiful.
anyway, i’m having a
tough time not only
because these spoons
are all adorable but
because i’m quite
picky about spoons
and dislike ones
that are too wide
(inconvenient) or
too shallow (poor
scoopage).
the hunt continues.
just kidding, i feel like
we all get what’s up
with wabi-sabi. it’s the
same reason why i love
handmade, imperfect
little objects and why
one might embrace
shoes showing
their creases and
notebooks growing
wider as pages
warp and layer upon
eachother. these two
photos are decay and
imperfect and cool
and i thought they’d be
worth including.
what’s up with wabi-sabi

yeesh a lot of hand talk
today. but come on.
hundreds of years
later, many hands
having molded and
assembled and
reinforced these
bronze walls and here
we are, standing inside
it as a childs pudgy
little fingers reach up
in admiration to touch
something that so
many have touched
before.
it’s poetic.
or at least i thought so.
touching buddha

SUNDAY
sunday was a slow day,
meant to be the one
rest day of the week.
pictured above is a pot
of flowers i saw by the
side of the road.
i really like all the flow-
ers potted next to the
sidewalk. whether a
part of the sidewalk’s
greenery or sitting
outside someone’s
door, it’s just sweet to
see and walk past. it’s
nice that even without
any ‘front yard’ or often
even a stoop (as doors
will open right onto the
sidewalk), people still
find a way to decorate
the outside of their
homes and make them
look inviting. it just ex-
tends into a ‘caring for
their space’ practice.
i’ll be honest, i didn’t
have many thoughts
today. i was tired and
spent time finishing
work and napping.
i think the constant
go-go-go was starting
to get to me, along
with what felt like
constantly getting 1-2
hours less sleep than i
needed.

for lunch we visited
a cat cafe that had
roughly two dozen ab-
solutely adorable cats.
this one fell asleep
right next to my chair
and i fell in love with
him. anyway, i enjoyed
the color patterns of
his coat and how it
almost mimiced the
floor’s woodgrain.
as we ventured out, we
saw the street near the
hostel bustling with
people and lined with
tables set up by vari-
ous vendors.
i found a stand of
handmade earrings
that really appealed
to me and ended
up picking up a pair.
these were so fun
and funky. i liked the
memphis-style, child-
like designs that also
felt a little modern art/
mondrian-y.
they’re playful and yet
almost elegant with
such a simple design
spotted at the cat cafe
makers tables
security camera
footage from a train
station. a cool feature
and also something i
could imagine being
filmed for a music
video. i liked the three
videos lined up, which
resembled the way i’ve
been assembling my
own videos.
just look up

MONDAY
i went shopping at @
cosme in harajuku
today, which had two
different floors of
beauty products.
i was really tempted
by all the different nail
polish displays they
had, with this brand’s
summer collection
particularly enticing.
it just felt like it cap-
tured so many colors
that i’ve seen here
in tokyo and was so
satisfying to see all laid
out together. props
to the people who put
this one together, you
nearly separated me
from my money once
again
nearly spending money
on tiny little bottles of
very pretty colors

whew do i love a good
fashion poster cam-
paign. through hara-
juku and ginza, i’ve
really enjoyed finding
cool little posters for
all sorts of handbags,
jewelry, and clothing.
these loewe posters
were attractive for a
couple reasons. as a
texture lover, i really
appreciated how rich
in texture each image
felt. the top right with
the red bag on light
green background
might be my favorite
inside it makes me
want to shrink down
and just bounce
around inside.
however, they’re a little
fun and not as pol-
ished or glitzy as some
other ads. there’s
color, some ridicu-
lous lilttle background
images and not com-
pletely perfect models.
entertaining visuals,
minimal text. cool.
looking at loewe
to be honest, it’’s
because i was wearing
black and green this
day and found it funny
that i was twinning with
the trash.
but i can say more.
reusable mesh bags
used for recycling
collection, little clips
to keep them up, the
labels removed making
it seem so clean and
simple for something
like trash. also cool.
why did i take this
photo?

another day of classes.
i bought this muji mat-
cha treat pastry baked
good thing from law-
sons, ate one bite, and
decided that would
be the last bite. just
wasn’t what i expected
it to be and ended up
being really dense.
i really like muji’s
branding. simple, red
ink on beige or card-
board brown paper.
only the information
needed, nothing more.
plus their products
are typically of reliable
quality.
a lot of my organiza-
tional items at home
are muji products.
sturdy clouded plastic,
all lined up on different
shelves, everything
sorted neatly. i miss
my shelves at home. i
miss rearranging them.
it’s weird what you
miss when you leave.
TUESDAY

thinking about all the
different textures on
the ground here in
tokyo - the bumps
and raised lines that
help show you where
to move, stop, stand,
wait, enter.
someone asked yuki
why there were so
many tactile guidance
tiles in the sidewalk
and his best response
was because there
was a company that
made them.
i think that’s a pretty
funny answer. but
aside for the visually
impaired, i find them
helpful, especially in
the train stations. plus,
it just makes walking
around a little more fun
floor bumps for an
enriched walking
experience
finally found the
individually wrapped
bananas everyone
mentions as evidence
of japan’s excessive
plastic use.
they’re not wrong,
it is excessive. and
it’s a waste because
the packaging isn’t
even nice. it was cool
to know where the
babana was grown, but
i’m sure a sticker could
do that job.
banananana

WEDNESDAY
ginza was fun, but
only about as fun as
any other shopping
district. almost like
a zoo for insanely
expensive items.
oh look, its a designer
bag. a pair of
sunglasses priced at
a month of rent. how
curious and bizarre
and sometimes pretty.
the highlight, of
course, was reaching
the top floor for an
expansive view of
nearby tokyo. it was
like a reward.
as i looked down, i
thought about how
many more rooftops
i wish were publicly
available and put to
use. give us everyday
people access to
the birds-eye views
so often left to only
those who can afford
highrises or who end
up employed in the
lego block office
buildings stacked into
the sky.
hi from the top of
ginza six
give me rooftop
gardens and rooftop
walkways and rooftop
benches!!!
and as i gaze down,
i think about how we
might be viewing on
borrowed time, in that
we take for granted
how much space
isn’t yet turned into a
constant barrage of
advertising. it might
feel overwhelming
from the ground, but
up high you realize how
much real estate still
goes unmarked.
no banners fill the sky
(yet), no enormous
billboards plastering
entire buildings (yet).
as a designer i
question what future i
might be a part of.
will i end up designing
campaigns to clutter
another space in
someone’s life? when
people ask what’s
next, i might answer
markerting. but is
that the future i want?
where do i actually
want my skills applied?
i already create
marketing imagery
and i feel conflicted
thinking my success
in making something
beautiful might entice
someone to enter debt
or waste their money.

nothing tickles me
more than an everyday
object going out of
its way to be well-
designed.
so much so that my
instagram feed is full of
targeted ads tempting
an endless stream
of well-designed
versions of bed linens
and bath towels and
vintage sofas and little
lamps and dinner sets
and cookware and
structured knitwear
and funky teapots
and european storage
sets and sculptural
loveseats and and...
because if we’re to
live beautiful little
lives, shouldn’t we
be surrounded by
beautiful little things?
day of
looking

THURSDAY
more thinking about
the beauty in nature’s
little details.
both of these were
near our meeting place
near senso-ji. i love
that even in a packed
city space, there are
these little bits of natu-
ral growth peeking out
if you look for them.
again, my love for
textures and greens
collide here. the tree
trunk to the right
already provides a per-
fect little color palette.
tiny little gems

i’m loving all the tiny
little gold details here
and i play a little game
where i guess how old
they actually are.
seeing the worn han-
dles was great here
- true wabi-sabi and
the beauty in evidence
something of orna-
mental being used
instead of sitting idle.
touch of gold
pattern on pattern
and rich colors galore
at senso-ji. i actually
found it really over-
whelming to be here
due to the crowds and
number of small stalls
dense with product,
customer, shop owner.
just a bit claustrophic.
but there’s always
some space to appre-
ciate seeing some-
thing traditional and
old and very beautiful.
my favorite parts were
these little white ac-
cents on the red paint
and the enormous lan-
terns hanging down.
big and small.
senso-overload
my outfit color palette
of the day made me
happy. i call these
pants my amity pants
because i usually pair
them with omething-
similar tonally - some
warm, clay or soil
inspired shade that
makes me look like i
could be in the amity
faction from divergent.
if you missed the
divergent hype of early
2010s, each person
would be assigned
a personality-based
faction that had a des-
ignated color palette.
and there was always
something appealing
about rolling up with
a bunch of people in
one coordinated color
scheme. part of the
appeal of wedding par-
ties or cults or suited
corporations, i guess.
resembling one of
those soil-based
boho watercolor
palettes

FRIDAY
completely soaked
in the aggressve rain,
a 7-eleven umbrella
found one long walk
too late.
colder air than i antici-
pated, nothing left but
to embrace that life
rarely goes as expect-
ed even if we have an
app to help predict it.
i actially like the rain,
i just hate being cold
and i’d prefer not to
start my day left with-
out an umbrella in the
lobby.
anyways, today i felt a
bit out of my creative
juices and made it a
priority to say goodbye
to tokyo.
drop
drip
drip
drop
drip
drip
drip
drip

one of the last two
places i wanted to visit
in tokyo happened to
be right next to cam-
pus.
this place was really
old and had giant piles
of red bean paste sit-
ting past the window.
i was glad i went, it was
delicious and perfect
rainy weather food.
red bean is one of my
favorite sweets flavors
(red bean ice cream
especially) and it once
again reminds me of
all the flavors koreans
and japanese share.
taiyaki wakaba
the other spot i want-
ed to stop at and, in
my opinion, the best
way to end our time in
tokyo.
it came at the cost
of one entire hour of
standing in the rain.
i am running out of
things to say here.
the sushi was great,
like tiny little precious
jewels laid out. i like
when a meal can have
a variety of different
bites. like having ban-
chan or a small army
of different hot sauces
for my tacos.
sushi no midori
it’s only getting cornier
folks.
anyway, this was at the
aforementioned taiyaki
place, a giant stone
that i’m guessing was
used to signal taking
one’s shoes off? or
maybe just a marker of
the entryway.
it reminded me of
the small stones you
sometimes see in
boston meant to help
mount horses or the
little areas to tie them
up. did you know nyc
has so many fountains
not for the view or for
the birds but for the
hoards of horses used
in day to day life de-
cades ago? echoes
of the past are every-
where.
a step into the past

SATURDAY
as our time here
moves on to the next
scene, the second act,
i find myself asking
what and why.
why am i here, what am
i to do? to create?
projects arrive and
demand develop-
ment and i find myself
shackled by the famil-
iar pressure to perform
there is perhaps no
greater stress than
being given freedom
creatively when you
know it will be graded.
i want to do something
good, but by what
standards? with what
purpose?
why why why

ah, here’s some cool
packaging for little
crackers shaped like
paper fish. somewhat
related to my project
for jamal’s class where
i want to explore alter-
native onigiri packag-
ing options.
i keep thinking about
the fact that design
is inherently a prob-
lem-solving practice.
art may be beauty
making, but design is
supposed to be driven
by the need to accom-
plish something.
but that also means i
have to invent prob-
lems and decide who
i want to solve for,
without ever getting
to see any real-worl
benefit since my de-
signs never leave the
confines of a canvas
assignment.
or at least not yet.
but even as a nearly
non-student, my work
has been comfortable
in its need to prob-
lem solve for clients
through photography.
it’s more forgiving than
design in many ways, a
bit harder to pick apart.
i question what i want
to do with my skills in
the future. i question
my skills. any this is all
human, normal, yadda
yadda. but it also
plagues me existen-
tially.
i think about how
often we decide art
and creating must be
purpose-filled and
bettering the world
and wonder how often
other professions de-
mand those answers
from themselves. if i
had become an ac-
countant, would i be so
saddled by the need
prove i’m useful?
pack it up

a treat for y’all
week threejune 3 - 10

SUNDAY
walking around kyoto
on our day off. i was
honestly a bit wiped
so i spent most of
the time napping
and recovering from
another week of
nonstop go go
go go
go go go
go.
or at least it felt like
it. i didn’t realize
tomorrow and the day
after would also be
packed with activities
so maybe it’s good i
spent the whole day
doing nothing but rest.
rest, work, decay.
enjoying kyoto so far,
really enjoying the
older wood buildings.
my dad worked a
lot of construction
growing up and i don’t
know, seeing wood
structures last the
test of time and stand
as remnants of the
hand-crafted work of
someone else’s father.
maybe i’m being
emotional.
different levels of
tradition and decay
in one city

really enjoying finding
that “one pop of color”
while i’m out walking.
a lot is concrete, tile,
grey, or natural sun-
bleached wood. and
then there’ll be this
brilliant little burst of
21st century plastic
in some cherry red or
insane teal or other
fischer-price adjacent
color.
there was a period
where all my notes
were black ink in a little
black-cover moleskine
peppered only by a
tiny marks from a red
marker. one pop of
color was my sh*t.
but that was also the
time i was having
fun learning about
bauhaus and russian
constructivism and
herbert bayer — black
and red and white
were all my rage. these
neutrals and yellow will
do right now.
simple accent colors
also been looking at
the doors here. in italy,
my dad was fascinated
by the different doors
the buildings had.
i’m not sure what this
hanging item is, but i
wish i did.
in fact, i wish more
of this dialogue had
those moments for
cultural education
about the things we
see in japan.
doors and
adornment

monday
monday
mondy
mody
moy
oy
still appreciating the
amount of elegant
decay and signs of use
i can find each day.
i found these benches
at the ryozen kannon
temple after our
meditation and i
wondered how many
peope had sat here
before.
built and old
MONDAY

i really enjoyed the
breath meditation
session we had. i’ve
tried to practice
meditation on and off
for years now, so it
was really nice to have
official time devoted
to it. i found the time
flew by and i felt quite
relaxed.
i spent a lot of time
thinking about the
monk’s words, about
how quickly time
passes and how paying
attention to your breath
in the moment can help
center you.
i’ve been thinking
about how quickly
time passes a lot
throughout the last
year. how it feels all
i’ve had of my twenties
have been whisked
away by the haze of
the pandemic. if three
years can go by this
quickly, how fast will the
rest of my life pass?
each year drags by
and yet suddenly
we’re already halfway
through 2023. it’s
good to stop and
cherish each moment,
take photos, breathe.
but it feels alarming
and completely out
of my control. 23 is
young. but i will blink
and 30 might be
looking back at me.
a moment of
meditation
do you enjoy feeling
small?
does it make you
feel connected to
something bigger?
does it feel freeing? is
it terrifying?
i like feeling small, like
a little “who” that a
horton might hear, but
maybe not. maybe
we just scurry around
on our enormous
rock in our even larger
galaxy and nobody
greater will ever hear
us and it’s fine because
everything larger than
us doesn’t care to be
hearing such small
people talk anyways.
big and small

TUESDAY
god, today was long.
like long long.
but i’m glad for it,
because we got to
do and see so much.
i honestly can’t say
much other than how
beautiful everything
was. from the lush
greenery, the small
temple details, the
masterfully crafted
garden.
i honestly can’t choose
what my favorite part
of the day was. but the
gardens of the imperial
palace were stunning.
at every turn you could
feel the intentionality,
someone’s careful
vision seen to life
hundreds of years later.
i wonder how many
people it took to
keep that up, how
many plans they have
reference to. i wonder
if any of the people
most tasked with the
gardens have visions
of their own for what
they wish they could
do after being so
acquainted with the
space.
kiyomizu-dera temple
was also breathtaking.
huge structures in
the sky, the rainy
like a delicate veil
making it even more
picturesque and grand.
a day of many things

you don’t need me
to say more about
the wonders of small
textures in nature,
right?
i mean we were
positively surrounded
by them. how could a
hand-made pattern or
textile compete? the
delicate patterns are
imperfect and yet there
is no doubt that they’re
exactly as they’re
meant to be.
it’s almost intimidating,
wanting to somehow
incorporate them in
work knowing that the
real object is just that
much more enthralling.
you can smell the
wood of the temples,
you can feel the ridges
of the stepping stones
underfoot.
honestly, i don’t know
what i’m looking to say
here. maybe just that
things are beautiful
and i don’t know how
i can make things to
complement them. i
don’t really know what
my motivation is (i
mean, i don’t have to
have one, i am only a
person). but i want to
share in celebrating
beautiful things but
everything i make
feels... so pedestrian
and plain and naive.
i feel humbled.
more more

WEDNESDAY
i don’t feel good today.
i woke up thinking,
hoping, it would be
allergies but it only got
worse. by the time i
was walking home, i felt
faint and weak and just
wanted to lay down.
yet i found time to take
a photo of this wall.

it’s funny that while i
have all this time to
repetitively praise the
beauty of nature and
its patterns, i also find
myself in a decidedly
built environment.
even much of the
nature i spot is
appearing through
walls and along paths
built by others.
i do appreciate the
styles i find in the
buildings here. so
much concrete and
tile, in perfect, cold, 90
degree contrast to the
whatever wood and
natural elements might
pop through.
not enough tile in the
US. that’s today’s
conclusion.
buildings

THURSDAY
i spent most of today
sleeping and resting.
at night i felt strong
enough and restless
enough to go out and
walk around a bit.
i ended up in a larger
shopping center, each
floor with new shops in
different sections.
i like clothes but
shopping tends to
grow old, like how malls
feel depressing now.
who made all of this? it
feels like the other side
of a landfill. ominous
and repetitive and too
brightly lit.
sleeping

really entertained
by the difference in
branding styles.
here you find so
many clothes basic
and unmarked. little
wordmarks outside
of luxury brands. this
sort of simplicity that
makes all outfits look
both uniform and sleek,
like they could’ve all
come from the same
catalogue.
meanwhile, the
7-eleven and lawsons
and subway ads
are riddled with text
everywhere. colors
and outlines and text
in every crevice, tiny
characters popping up
to advertise food or
train stations or apps.
once again it feels
like a country of stark
contrast.
in the US, i feel like
everything has a
similarly busy branding.
every backpack and
bottle and hoodie has
some company’s mark.
even though there are
individual outliers, it
doesn’t feel stark.
quiet and loud
i don’t know, i’m still
thinking about the
clothes here.
it’s an interesting mix,
high quality cottons
and also the cheapest
little polyester things
will hang next to
eachother. maybe
that’s just all fashion to
be honest.
clothessss

FRIDAY
back to looking closer
at the buildings i pass
when walking to and
from class.
the different tiles
used on the exterior
of buildings remains
interesting to me.
you’d expect them to
be largely plain given
the task of covering a
building, but instead
so many are covered
in delightful little tiles
with greens or blues or
reds.
even these tiles, each
wonderfully unique. it’s
just a beautiful touch.
i try to imagine who
made the decision that
their store would be
adorned with this color,
who picked out the tiles
and how many they
might’ve looked at.
speaking of which,
i need to look into
joining some pottery
classes or a studio
once i am in one place
for an extended period
of time.
all of the tile

while i was walking
around, i found these
worn away tiles
underneath an awning.
it just stood out to me.
i mean, you don’t see
this often because it’s
technically a sign of
poor materials. your
street “shouldn’t” erode
away because of rain
water, but then it’s a
bit crazy to assume
that everything to last
perfectly forever. they
just don’t.
anyway, i’m still not
feeling great today and
honestly i don’t have
many other thoughts.
this is starting to feel
like a writer’s journal
that just details how
many days it takes
them to think of
anything.
i’m starting to miss
having any privacy.
every moment is
passed in a communal
space and my
introverted side is
struggling big-time. i
just miss the pure
silence of being
alone in my room, but
maybe that’s made
worse by only wanting
to sleep and lay
around because i feel
exhausted.
wearing away

SATURDAY today was cool. that’s
it, that’s the takeaway.
today was cool and fun
and a much needed
refresher.
crafts! little crafts!
making paper and
getting our hands wet
and squishing tiny bits
of pulp around.
it was an honor to be
have access to this
process. and it was
just a lot of fun. it
makes me think of the
crafts i used to do as
a kid, summers in a
hot highschool making
paper mache blobs
or very uneven pinch
pots. those summers
remind me of how
much i feel fulfilled
working with my hands,
and how i wish i had
more of that in my life.
i want to make more, to
craft and create. but
it seems that takes
time and space and
supplies, all of which
feel so hard to collect
in one place right now.
papermaking

i loved that they still
had older equipment
at the workshop. the
wood worn into a
perfect groove to
launch the press into
the air and back down
again. it reminded
me of these “sheep
to shawl” festivals my
mom would take me to
in the spring.
sheep would get shorn
and in this historic
house, people in little
1800s outfits would
demonstrate each step
of processing the fiber
with the machinery
they had at that time.
the kids even got to
participate, picking
debris out of wool or
touching the spindle
like sleeping beauty.
it’s just great to see old
techniques preserved
and in-use. i think of all
the mastery of certain
processes that have
died to time making
them obsolete, lost to
the past.
keeping the old

SUNDAY
feels like another day
where there’s nothing
much to say.
when we don’t have an
early morning, i happily
sleep in and enjoy life
without an alarm.
after trying out the gym
and taking my time to
finish some stuff for a
work project, the only
real thing i did was have
gyu-kaku with tianna
and claudia. i’m very
much appreciating how
affordable good meat
is here and am trying
to tkae full advantage
of it. i don’t eat red
meat nearly as much
in the US just because
it’s more expensive for
more mediocre quality.
another day of rest

it’s beginning to
dawn on all of us that
the end of the trip is
approaching far more
rapidly than anyone
wants. so i’m trying to
get the best of what
i can here and took
some time to look at
the different shops.
i’m starting to think
about checking things
off of my souvenir list:
a good knife, incense
and an incense holder,
maybe more ceramics
or cool clothing.
i usually try to limit
how many material
items i bring into my
life, shopping slowly
and waiting weeks to
pick up items that have
caught my eye. but
knowing we’re on a
limited time schedule
has sent me into that
must shop mentality
where i almost
frantically scan shops
hoping that something
will call out to be and
demand a part of
my life. i’m trying to
remember that in my
real life i’ve tried to lean
away from impulsive
buying, the need
for more, and being
reasonable about what
i actually “need”... but
here i treat myself lol
walking around
the market

MONDAY
this day trip was a lot
of fun. i liked that we
had free roam for most
of the day. i love deer,
despite their stink,
because they just
fulfill that very disney
bambi magic slot in
my childhood memory.
one time my friends
and i had rented a
place in more rural PA
and were surrounded
by a ton of beautiful,
gentle deer. i loved
waking up early and
seeing their long little
legs gently step on the
frozen grass.
to shatter the magic
for a moment, i felt
exceptionally hot and
damp and stinky too.
a day in nara

spent much of the
trip at nara by myself,
taking things slowly
and collecting some
images for kate’s class.
i’ve always had a
fondness for moss - as
a kid, the outer edges
of the yard would grow
moss along the dirt
and grass and fallen
leaves and i would just
touch them gently and
feel their little give and
how tiny and soft and
very fun they are. who
needs grass when
you can have this fun
squishy ecosystem.
i dont know how much
more i have to say on
this topic. everything
was lush and green
and wet and much like
everything else here.
i am feeling a
bit unmotivated
concerning the work
for this class, since i’m
growing tired of making
things for the sake of
hypotheticals and i
think once again, for
the thir-ourth year in a
row, simply exhausted
by being in classes. i
love this trip and y’all
are cool, but it’s more
about the rhythms of
being a student.
looking close

TUESDAY
this is actually more
like monday part two
because all these
images are from part
two of what we did on
monday. i simply didn’t
take photos of my very
routine “go to class
and then eat dinner”
day today. yesterday
was a Group Day and
after nara seven of us
ventured out to rent
bikes and loudly pedal
around Kyoto as the
sun set.
it’s been funny thinking
about the mix of
people on this trip. in
many ways i don’t feel
like i particularly fit in,
since the young ones
do their own thing and
the older ones have a
group chat i’m not a
part of. for the most
part tianna and i are in
the same boat and we
enjoy doing our thing
together. spending
time with The Rest was
fun and i appreciated it.
f is for friends who do
stuff together

in reality, i often
struggle to feel like
i’m ever creating
solid bonds with
people. maybe
that’s the typical ND
experience, maybe
it’s all a holdover from
childhood, maybe
i’m just projecting
because at the end
of the day i value my
alone time and don’t
even love constantly
being with others.
but somethings i get
stuck on this feeling
of being exceedingly
lonely in the presence
of people who aren’t
acquaintences and
aren’t my close friends.
we don’t know
eachother, not really.
and that’s okay.
what is friendship

WEDNESDAY
how are things going?
we’re in class, we’re
chugging along.
everything has
become a daily rhythm
and i’m not mad about
it. i do, however, miss
working. i have this
ever-present hole
in each day where i
think about not only
how i’m missing out
on work projects and
$ to be here, but how
much i actively miss
working on photo/video
projects.
then comes that fear of
oh-god-what-if-more-
work-won’t-come that
happens every time i
have to put things on
pause.
after graduating i
have all this pressure
to feel like i can take
the next step and
not have the ground
swallow me whole. and
i can, i am incredibly
privileged to have
my parents whose
home i will probably
temporarily return to
so i can save on rent.
and i have a couple
years’ experience of
freelancing and i know
that i want to continue
doing that.
but that feeling of being
three steps behind
never leaves. the other
grads have lofty plans
of traveling all summer,
maybe for the next
year, job offers from
co-ops and such a
beautiful little “oh things
will be fine” attitude.
and maybe that is their
own facade they have
and if i didn’t have
anxiety and financial
fears i could partake
in it too, but instead
i feel deflated, feeling
too old to just now be
graduating when all my
friends did two years
ago.
feeling like i always
have less skills than
others, less to show
for myself, and far
too much experience
with derailing medical
emergencies and
mental health crises.
feeling unemployable
on “real” design work
because i never was
accepted to a design
co-op when i had the
fortune of applying
during the pandemic
and never made work
good enough to beat
out the competition.
the pains of trying
to be creative is
that everything
feels personal. and
personally, i don’t feel
good enough.
mid week check-in

this one-trick-pony
makes another round
small pretty things

THURSDAY
pumped up with
caffeine from the fun
little tea ceremony
experience, i set out
to go look through the
many nearby shops to
see if i can check more
off of my souvenir to-
do list.
i ended up spending
most of the time
walking around with
django, which was
actually kind of nice
because he doesn’t
linger long so we
moved through the
shops at a clip pace.
there were so many
beautiful ceramic
pieces i enjoyed, but
i didn’t give into the
urge to collect them
all. i did get some
matcha powder for me
and my little brother,
chopsticks for me and
my mom, a knife, and a
cool incense holder.
i also finally checked
out the sou sou shops
and they were every bit
a textile wonderland.
i found a cool pair of
pants that i’ll have to go
back for when i have
my passport at hand.
tea ceremony

before we went to the
tea ceremony, i was
walking around the
marketplace near our
hostel and found this
place selling very cute
plates.
i really wanted to get
some of these raised
edge plates (like plates
that are 1/4 bowl),
but i couldn’t decide
on which glaze and
decided to come back
if i really wanted them.
i dont know, what
do you think? i think
they’re simple enough
to be used everyday
but not necessarily
“special”. just probably
more affordable than
if i bought them back
in the US. the white
is very neutral but the
grey-green is more
interesting. kind of
rustic-y.
maybe i just won’t get
them, this whole time
i’m calculating how i’m
going to pack things to
bring them back.
to plate or not to plate

FRIDAY
today was actually
really nice, i ended
up going to dinner +
drinks with henry and
claudia. we went to
this really small place
that was basically
a mom cooking in
her living room with
only four seats. i
ended up getting the
“special” and it was a
plate of nine different
little vegetable (and
occasionally beef)
bites. it was adorable
and very tasty. i
definitely want to find
more of these small,
delicious places but
it’s tough to find them
without references
from other people.
maybe i’ll just continue
to leech off of the list
henry’s friend gave him
a day out

as much as i’ve been
enjoying the food here,
i really miss tacos and
plantain. it’s something
i eat pretty often and i
miss it.
i’m not gonna lie, i miss
the whole routine.
usually each weekend
kendrick and i will
order tacos, plantiain,
empanadas, what have
you. we make sure we
get different flavors in
a mini conference that
always has a hilarious
level of intensity. then
we’ll maybe watch a
game or a show and it’s
just something i look
forward to each week.
so yeah, i miss the
company and the food
and our silly routines.
missing tacos and
plantain

SATURDAY
i really enjoyed this
visit, especially since
we were able to ask
questions about the
process. it was a bit
chaotic being in the gift
shop - i really wanted
to pick up bowls but
the amount of options
were hard to choose
between. in the end i
kind of ran out of time
but i’m happy with what
i ended up with.
buying bowls in two felt
sweet, thinking about
the future meals i’ll
share with them. it also
really made me want
miso soup.
the repetitive, slow
movements reminded
me of my dad again.
he did a lot of work on
our house (like, a nearly
non-stop amount of
work) and one of the
biggest themes was
how much repetitive,
boring work went into
making things beautiful
and exact. sanding
every piece, laying tile,
soldering each wire.
every action needs a
lot of care, every detail
needs time to be done
well. the difference
might seem minor, but
he stressed the pride in
knowing his work was
done right throughout.
laquerware making

i’m so happy we ended
up here. it was so
pretty and refreshing.
i could’ve stayed for
hours more, just sitting
there and enjoying the
view.
thanks for ensuring we
got to see this :)
pretty surprises
we’re down to one
week, which is a little
insane.
i’m pretty happy with
how things have gone,
i feel like i’ve done and
seen a lot. this last
week has me a little
stressed given how
much work we have
to do. i’m sure it’ll be
fine but i just want to
have enough time
and energy to do new
things too.
end of week

SUNDAY
most of today was
spent slow and solo,
something i welcome.
i did slept in again (the
usual sunday routine)
and spent a lot of
time walking around
the shops. i needed
to find a duffel bag to
help pack everything
i bought during this
trip, but unfortunately
didn’t find anything
that wasn’t ridiculously
overpriced (i’m looking
at you, patagonia).
i didn’t come up
completely empty-
handed — see classic
mj tee that is destined
to enter the shared
closet rotation for me
and k. worth the as-of-
now non-existent extra
luggage space.
i honestly should
explore more of
kyoto outside of the
immediate area, but
with so much to look
at so close by, it’s been
easy to feel satisfied
staying close. there’s
no shortage of places
to wander into, even if
most have overpriced
vintage duffels.
another slow sunday

i won’t lie, it does feel
like there’s a lot i’m
missing out on.
i took a break from
work to get an iced
coffee from a shop
that was filled with
chatter and people
looking like they were
having a good time.
but of course i couldn’t
understand or engage
in any of it. instead i
just bumbled my way
through a coffee order
and scampered away
as quickly as possible
to avoid being present
in something that i
clearly didn’t belong to.
i don’t see how anyone
lives here without
knowing japanese.
coffee shops
i won’t lie, this has
become one of my
favorite meals here. it’s
a spicy tantanmen beef
soup with wide hand-
pulled noodles and
cilantro.
it’s comforting, filling,
and just really delicious.
i went in for lunch by
myself today, eating at
the counter, and they
quickly took my order
and didn’t say a thing
about my swollen brow.
soon after, a hot bowl
came and i could just
eat happily.
this is getting boring
to talk about, i can’t
imagine you’re enjoying
reading this.
girl spent day alone.
girl got noodles. girl
loves noodles. call
me the next american
writer, i truly am the
voice of my generation.
fascinating material.
finding favorites

MONDAY
today’s trip was very
cool. there was more
than a little hesitation
going into another
weekend-adjacent day
trip following another
night of not enough
sleep, but i’m grateful i
went. everything was
very pretty and i was
able to take some
interesting photos.
i was walking through
the iconic gates
and noticed how...
imperfect they were.
moss and spiderwebs
and dusty hand prints
and evidence of a lot
of visitors. i wonder
how other people felt
standing in their insta-
perfect spots.
was it just as satisfying
as they expected
from photos? did
the ceremony at the
start make things feel
more important than a
photo op? how do the
japanese feel?
it’s the cliiimb

the sheer quantity
of gates was really
impressive. tiny ones
tucked into shrines all
along the pathways.
who made these how
long have they been
here?
i wonder if it’s
therapeutic, if one
person just cranked
out a couple hundred
in a zen-like meditative
state. i could go for
something repetitive
and mind-numbing.
little gates
i took the walk up alone,
stopping only to get
some guidance of a
group of much older
ladies walking together
with little walking
sticks and gloves and
backpacks.
the narrow stairs were
brutal but thankfully
short and honestly i’m
grateful for the physical
activity.
the walk down was
confusing in an i’m-lost-
but-that’s-okay way
walk up/down

TUESDAY
what is this building?
it looks distinctly like
something i might find
in mass or ny, some old
building that used to
belong to some family.
do i bother to look it
up? no, because i am
lazy and it is easier
to simply write the
questions here and
muse on it than to stop
and search it up.
let’s pretend some
guy came over in the
early 1900s, made
this building because
it resembled the
homes he was used to,
and used it as some
space for studying
or diplomating or
otherwise being some
white man in japan 100
years ago.
little mystery

stopped at the grocery
store in the subway
on the way back from
class and picked up
a combination of tiny
fragrant strawberries
and a pack of pre-cut
assorted cheeses.
i then returned the the
hostel and devoured
both. there is little that
can compare to fresh
fruit and some cheese.
cue the ratatouille
scene where the
colors of remy the rat’s
palatte dance across
the screen as he eats
grape and a hunk of
cheese. i am that rat,
that rat is me.
tiny mundance
delights
also on that list is the
near constant supply
of moss growing in
random spots. moss,
you will always be a
star. the most adorable
and squishable of
random growths.
also, this hat. it made
me laugh, then made
me think, then laugh
again. a couple weeks
ago i also considered
getting a short tee
that was adorned only
with a single easily
misinterpreted word
on it.
big love for messy
english translations.
tiny mundance
delights p.2

WEDNESDAY
the week continues
and it feels like the
end is too-rapidly
approaching. i’m
feeling more than a little
apprehensive about my
current poster project.
honestly, i just struggle
to feel confident in
my work. there’s this
constant voice telling
me that my ideas are
plain and uninteresting.
even this book is plain
and uninteresting, i fear
work work
more walking around
shops searching for
duffel bags. still none
found.
i did come across
these very pretty
glasses. i think a lot of
this trip has consisted
of me looking at pretty
things and going “wow.
that’s pretty.”
not necessarily deep
thoughts, but it has
become a huge
resource to reference
whenever i think about
the kind of items i
want in my life. i’m
considering i should
play with more pattern
in my wardrobe.
they make patterns
seem luxurious and
sophisticated here,
instead of silly + busy.
small glasses

i’m quite happy with
how things turned
out. i won’t say things
were perfect, but they
worked which was a
great relief.
i don’t know how to
stop looking to others
for confirmation of the
quality of my work. i
guess it’s silly, since
everything of aesthetic
value is determined so
by people other than
the artist. viewers,
curators, etc. they are
who decide a piece
is special. and all
design is dependent
on feedback to be its
most effective.
but i feel like my need
to hear that something
i did is good is a
burden, a weight that
needs to be lifted by
some therapy and
time. it feels naive, it
feels immature to want
approval. and yet i
feel like my own worst,
most negatively biased
critic, depending on
others to prove me
wrong.
presentation day

little star imprints
on a sewage grate.
small statues of frogs
or bears or other
creatures placed to
welcome visitors. so
cute! i appreciate the
attention to detail and
the tiny joy sparked
by knowing someone
set out to make these
things, to place them
here.
i’ll be honest, i had
anticipated a lot more
working with my hands
for this trip.
i think i crave creating
things that can exist
without a screen, that
i can labor over for
hours and hold.
small details
this mini pig cafe was
a highlight. i was tired,
stressed, and have
spent most of the few
days alone. sometimes
feeling left out of plans.
it was nice to go here,
even if it came from
basically inserting
myself into plans i
wasn’t initially invited
to. is that too self-
pitying? ooh look at me,
i’m alone and nobody
invites me anywhere?
i talk about enjoying my
alone time, which i do,
but it feels different at
times when it’s not by
choice.
this tiny one chose my
lap for the hour. for
him, i was grateful.
piglets

FRIDAY
we’re done, basically.
final presentations
have been presented.
we sat in the classroom
for one last time,
together for the
second-to-last time.
over lunch, we talked
about how we felt. how
the past couple weeks
have flown by. what we
miss (for me, hispanic
food, k, the privacy of
my own room). how we
felt about our projects
(anxious, relieved,
ambivalent).
the fact that many of
us won’t see eachother
again.
for the grads, we’re
fairly confident that our
lives will just split off. i
can barely remember
who was in my first
dialogue four years
ago. is that sad? or
just a course of life?
it’s definitely just the
course of life. i don’t
anticipate being sought
out by anyone after this
program and honestly,
i’m okay with that.
i don’t know what to
share other than corny
“dear diary, i wonder
how people perceive
me” musings.
someone asked me
if i miss my family and
i said no. that’s not
surprising to me but i
guess it might’ve been
to them.
someone asked me
if i thought this trip
changed me. and in
my opinion i would
change within 5
weeks even if i weren’t
abroad. i don’t think
i’m enlightened, i just
have more interesting
memories now.
last day

i’ll miss kyoto. i’ll
miss many japanese
customs (the
cleanliness. the
bidets. the wet cloths
at the start of a meal.
not having to make
conversation in stores,
not only because
i literally can’t, but
because nobody wants
me to.)
i took a long walk today,
and finally found a
duffel bag.
in a sentimental mood

SATURDAY
i wonder about how
women feel living here.
i wonder what culture
shock would be to
them living in the US or
UK or anywhere else.
do they feel hyper
aware of the masculine
culture? would the
insane back-and-
forth on womens vs
mens issues in the US
intrigue them or feel
completely insane? do
all women fear being
sexualized, perceived,
picked out the same
way? i don’t think i
felt as wary here. but
maybe the threat
to them feels just
as real. the culture
surely doesn’t lack in
objectifying women,
making them targets.
but US culture is hardly
better. women might
be louder, bolder (to
our eyes), but they’re
also just as vulnerable
in many ways. plus,
you know, we can get
shot by our partners.
guns heighten that fear
ceiling.
i liked bryn’s project,
but i wonder what a
japanese woman might
have to say about our
culture. you might not
see content drawn as
often, but the amount
of photos and videos
available of real people
outweighs a 7-eleven
mag, right? i think
there’s a lot more to
say about this topic but
i don’t have evolved
thoughts right now.
disembodied arms at
the prada store
found a very cool pir of
ugg collab sneakers in
a mall. i walked away
and started down the
block before turning
back to ask for them
in my size. i’m only
here once, i thought.
i ended up leaving
the shoes i brought
outside the room with
discarded cardboard
boxes and shopping
bags. i hope i don’t end
up missing them.
new shoes

dinner was sweet. i’m
glad we were able to
gather one last time,
and even more so that
it was an experience
for all of us. there was
a lot of simply trying
something and hoping
it was a taste and
texture i liked.
i wish someone
from the group had
stood to thank you
two. because thank
you. this was a big
experience and i’m
very happy that you
two were the ones
running it. it didn’t feel
too suffocating or too
demanding, but was
not completely lax
either.
we had the freedom to
discover things on our
own but were guided to
the main spots.
it was memorable and
fun and i am so glad i
could come.
the final adventure
thank you and goodbye

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